by Jas T. Ward
Reno ran his fingers through his hair and shook his head slowly in confusion. “But I feel. I hear and see. I mean...I walk and talk. If I’m dead as in dead dead, how is that possible?”
Yin walked over and took his hand. “When Madness was able to claim its Keeper it also became what animated you. What allowed you to exist to do all those things. You no longer have blood. You have pure dark power pulsing through you. As long as your power and you are one, you will continue to be as you are now.”
Reno searched her eyes and whispered as his eyes drifted away, “The black I saw in my blood. Why I got so sick. The noises in my head. All that was Madness trying to take me over?”
Omega nodded. “Yes. But the love and compassion you found in your new life kept it at bay. When that was gone, Madness started overtaking you. But it was not until the purpose for which Bounce had created you ended that it could then fully attach.”
Reno lifted his hand and stared at the back of it. The blackness had receded beneath his pale skin but as he turned his arm over he could see that the veins were darker than blue if anyone looked or knew. He sighed and blew it out slowly as if testing the fact. “And I breathe. But I don’t really need to?”
Yin nodded and bounced on her feet again once again excited. “Your body is just doing what its instinct is to do. You don’t really need to eat or sleep or any of the frail human functions because you are no longer human.”
Omega put a hand on Yin’s arm to slow her down. “Let’s not overwhelm him, Balance. I am sure this is much to take in.”
Reno let out a snort, finding that a big, huge understatement. “Oh yeah. No. This is like an every few years thing with me.” He let out a humorless laugh and circled a finger in the air in front of him.
“So, I’m immortal? And not human. But I can exist and function as long as my dark power is allowing me to do so.” He looked up almost afraid to ask and learn the answer. “So who’s in charge? Because I really have a problem not being the one calling my body’s shots. I’ve been there and done that. Didn’t get a t-shirt and it gave me gas.”
Omega laughed heartily once again. “Oh it’s a partnership of sorts. As long as you do your Keeper purpose and ensure that Madness is fed and controlled, you are completely in charge. Live whatever life you wish and live it however you would like. But be warned. You are neither light nor are you dark. You must walk the very fine line between the two in order to maintain your power and also control it from growing too strong. It needs you as much as you need it. A Keeper walks the shadow between the dark and light. And never treads too long in either one. So, you are one of the shadows. A Shadow-Keeper is of the line that keeps the two sides defined and balanced.”
Yin reached out to take Reno’s hand again. “I’ll help you. To make sure you don’t go either way. You’ll need to learn to feed Madness too.”
Reno yanked his hand away and took several steps back away from them, putting his hands up. “Oh no. I won’t be like those Eaters and chew on people. No offense but I always thought that was really gross. I won’t become a sucker thing.”
Omega shook his head as he chuckled. “No. As you are the first Keeper, we aren’t exactly sure how you would feed. But Madness is insanity so you would need to ensure it is fed that. You have time, Reno, to learn all your new powers. But I can assure you, we would not expect you to take lives unless they were deemed too dark to be. That would help the light and the balance.”
Reno gawked at them both. “Oh great...wait. Am I a zombie? I thought they only walked around going brains, brains.” He put his arms out and lumbered around as if he was a movie zombie.
Omega laughed and shrugged. “I guess in a way, you are a zombie. But unlike the movies, no plague or chemical animates you. Your power does. And well, no dropsy or need for brains. Nor will you rot, as you are suspended from aging or deteriorating due to the power that flows through you. You’re hygiene needs are the same as a human. However, your needs are purpose-based rather than human-based. Food and such are wants rather than needs.
“And since you are already dead, you cannot be killed. Your power will restore any damage and you will continue to function. We believe you will go to the Void, as you did when you died, until your body is made whole again, or healed if horrible damage is done. But I wouldn’t suggest removing your own head or exploding yourself into tiny bits. No being is indestructible. And you can go in the sun as that was a weakness of a Breaker which you no longer are. But, be careful. Being controlled by darkness, you will have very little powers in sun or bright light. Or in the presence of innocents.”
Yin was once again bouncing as she almost squealed her next statement. “And you’re a demigod because of who your daddy is!”
He blinked and tilted his head as he narrowed his eyes towards her. That explained while Madness had been trying to take him over he was in the sun without going bye-bye. But his brain halted when Yin tossed that little yippee out there causing him to blink and gawk at her. His gaze drifted right and then left to come back to rest on Omega. “Is she talking that endearment thing again? Because I don’t have a daddy. Or are you my daddy too?”
Omega shook his head but his amusement was clear on his face. “No. I am not your daddy in that regards.” He paused and motioned with an outstretched hand to a chair. “You may want to sit down for this for it’s a bit twisted.”
Reno’s jaw dropped as he moved to sit and let out a laugh of disbelief. “It’s just now getting twisted? Dude, have you been paying attention?”
Yin laughed and hopped to sit in his lap and draped her arms around his shoulders as she continued to bounce there too. He shifted before she bounced something that might realize it was alive again, thinking that would be weird. Really weird.
Omega sat and thought how best to tell this part of it all, causing his face to go somber as he asked. “Do you remember who killed you?”
Reno frowned and nodded, trying not to dwell on the memory for it still burned as white as the blade that slashed through him. “Yeah. I do. Powerful guy, but he was not very nice. Had white hair with blue eyes and he was weird. It was like he knew me, but I didn’t know who he was. Kept...,” brows came down trying to recall what he needed from that night without going back to it in his head, “acting like he cared about me at the same time as he was slaughtering me. It was strange.” Reno’s eyes met Omega’s. “Who was he?”
Yin went still and quiet as she too looked at Omega, her hand stopping its motion on the back of his neck. Omega said softly, “That was your father.”
Chapter Forty-Three
Family Ties
Reno felt like the room spun really fast, and then like someone put the brakes on even faster when he heard what Omega said.
He looked away as his brow creased and his face flushed with shocked confusion. “Wait. My father killed me? I was never born. How...?” He looked over at Omega and then down at Yin. “I think I’m confused again.”
Yin reached up to cup his face and waited until his eyes focused with hers. Her voice was soft and it had an edge of an apology in the tone as she spoke.
“You are the son of Epsilon in body and spark since he created the first Keeper. Epsilon is the son of Lucifer, which makes you the dark lord’s descendant as well. It was Epsilon’s son that your body came from. I thought it would lure him out seeing Kelion walk around, so when Bounce asked me for a body, I stole it from where Epsilon kept it hidden in Hell. I was hoping we could catch Epsilon when he went after you.
“I didn’t know you were who I was looking for. I thought the cowboy was when I would sense darkness there. But it was so hidden and now we know why. He kept you hidden and locked up before you came to be. I didn’t know Madness had already started to try to merge with you.”
Reno jerked his face from her touch to clench his teeth, a slow tick pulsing in his jaw. He hissed angrily as he bared his fangs. “So you used me to protect Jess. I was just disposable?” He snorted as his lip curled in disgus
t. “Don’t worry. You weren’t the first goddess.”
He lifted her off his lap and dropped her before rising from the chair to walk off the sensation that was all too familiar.
“My whole existence. Hell, whichever one you want to poke at, I’ve been a pawn. Used and thrown away. Don’t know why I even care or why it hurts anymore.”
He stopped moving and straight-armed the back of his chair from which Yin still sat to watch him. “So my dad killed me because he figured I was bait. That’s what he said.” He glared down at Yin. “And you let him because that was your plan?”
Yin winced at his pain and looked over at Omega. “No. Yes. Both?” She looked over frantically at Omega seeking help in how to explain it.
Omega tilted his head and gave her a ‘not getting you out of this one’ look as he crossed his arms sitting back to watch.
She twisted her lips in frustration and got to her feet to pace. “I didn’t know you were anything more than a flaw. That I will admit. I did not know you could be anything other than what you were. I have been watching Jess since he became a Breaker, and continued to do so after you were separated. So I did not become aware of your special destiny until Madness made itself known after you died, when I felt it grow stronger despite the claim death had on your body. I was mistaken.” She held her hands up in the air in complete defense. “What? It happens.”
Reno stood and felt a little better, but not much. Wrapping his arms around himself, he asked softly as he rocked back on his heels, “So what now? What happens to me? Do I have to stay here? Do I go to well...wherever? What?”
Omega stood and walked over to him and placed his hand once again on Reno’s arm. “You have choices now, Keeper. As I said before, your life and your new purpose are yours to do what you wish. As long as your purpose is met the High Council will allow you to return to the realm of mankind to do your duties.”
Reno thought of that and asked as he hunched up his shoulders and looked down at the floor. “Does Bounce know I still exist? What I was meant to be? Any of it?” He really hoped not. Part of him still respected and admired the god, both as his former boss, and creator. Boy, how many creators could one person have? He’d have to get a scorecard if he ever had to explain it. Maybe a pie chart.
Oo. Pie. When was the last time he had pie?
Omega cleared his throat before speaking, which in turn caused Reno’s eyes to un-glaze from the thought of pie.
“No. Bounce was not aware. The lost Shadow-Keeper was thought a myth. No more than a fairy tale told to children. You can return to your former life or you can start anew. We can even give you a new face and existence. But as your body is claimed by Madness, sorry, no upgrades there and no changing the way you and Sundown are connected. Maintaining your Dark Power is the sole purpose for both of you now.”
Reno’s head snapped up when Omega said that, and he realized he hadn’t heard a peep in his head since he was brought back to life. Uh, death. Zombie-ism? That triggered a fear and he moved away to do some internal checks like he used to in the past.
“Sundown?”
At first there was only silence and he felt grief move through him. He had never been without Sundown, in one form or another and the thought of his dark side being gone scared the crap out of him. He closed his eyes and whispered the name again.
“Please be there, Sundown.”
“Just once, I’d like to be consulted. I mean shit, I may not get to do any of the god-damned shopping, or pick out where we get to eat, but some things I should get a fucking memo on. Ain’t it bad enough I never get laid and you do enough for the both of us? Or is that three of us now? Yet another thing I didn’t get a memo on. Down right rude.
And by the way? I am not covering for the new thing. It’s crazy. We’re talking major loco. It’s babbling worse than a junkie on crack. But yeah, I’m here. Where the Hell else am I supposed to go? And you better make the right damn choice this time, or I’m going to kick our sinuses until they come out our ass. You got me?”
Reno started laughing as his dark side began fortifying very strongly that it existed and they were very much still a part of each other in typical Sundown style.
But as he listened he sensed something more than Sundown. It seemed to be hissing, and felt like it was scratching at his gooey grey matter. Face twisted in wavering doubt, he walked over to brace a hand on the wall and dropped his head to stare down at the floor between his bare feet.
He almost didn’t want to verify it but he knew, like Omega said, it was a partnership.
“Madness?”
Sundown fell silent and at first Reno thought that maybe he had no idea what he was doing. Could a dark power even talk?
But then the hissing increased and a loud static like noise vibrated through his head. Reno brought his other hand up to cup and kneed his forehead as what felt like crackling energy started firing in his synapses like small fireworks in his brain.
-We here. We are they, you is us. We are here. Hi! We are glad we are us with they.-
Madness had the strange high-pitched voice of a child, but in layers, as if the seconds it took for the words to be said caused an echo of each one, over and over. Reno had to take in a few fast, deep breaths as a bit of panic of having yet another passenger in his head took reins on his emotions.
Reno knew he had to learn to get this under control, so he whispered back, “Did you help me? That night with Witch? The night I died did you try to help then too?”
Again silence and Reno felt a strange twisting in his gut that seemed to be connected to his head as it coiled and then uncoiled. Not totally unpleasant but it would definitely take some getting used to. But he also realized that it felt right, like knowing the presence had been absent for a long time without knowing he had been missing it.
-Yes. To care for you. You unhappy. We wanted us happy. Cowboy in the way of us. Dead yes. You not run. Bad. We tried to help. But we need they dead so we could be us. Sorry-
He couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at his Dark power’s strange, disjointed way of speaking. “It’s okay. We’re really bad at decisions. Guess it’s our thing, huh?”
Madness and then Sundown laughed causing Reno to smile. Guess he never had to worry about being alone again. Not with a split personality and a dark power latched on.
They would let him decide. And he had such a cold feeling of déjà-vu as he remembered when Mr. Hahn and Bounce had given him the same option. Return to a life that didn’t want him, or make a new one and hope he didn’t screw it up like the old one. That pain in his heart started throbbing again which was a surreal feeling considering it didn’t beat.
Witch and Rugrat were in that old life and as much as he tried to believe they didn’t want him there, he hoped he was really wrong. But then again, maybe they had moved on after so much time. Maybe they were better off thinking he was dead so they could have a normal life.
A normal life...
Reno wasn’t sure if Witch would want to be with a zombie, or have someone that carried insanity help raise her child. Maybe Emma deserved and needed a life without all that in it to have some peace. And without him she could have that. All Reno wanted was for them to be happy. Dead or not, that had never changed.
Feeling Madness seem to curl up like a strange cat inside of him, he then turned to face Omega and Yin. “So. I have to make a choice for what’s best for Madness, Sundown and me, right?”
Omega nodded. “Yes. You do. But you have time. You’ll need to learn your powers and ensure you are stable before returning to the realm of mankind. Then the choice is yours.”
Yin walked up and wrapped herself around him again, pressing herself against his chest. “I’ll help.” She then whispered in his ear, flicking out her tongue to lick the lobe. “With whatever you want.”
“I got something she can help us with. Let me out and get us a room.”
Madness just snickered insanely.
Oh great. This was going to be
sooo much fun.
Chapter Forty-Four
Changes and Choices
(Two Months Later)
Reno was alone as he stood in front of mirrored wall, a sheen of sweat coating his bare chest, and his breath sawing in and out from training.
But this training had been different.
His full Keeper form decided to make an appearance. The warrior winged-angel that Yin had brought to him to fight had been kicking his ass like it was nothing, all while Yin bounced and cheered on the beating. Then something snapped in his head and he was expecting Sundown to take over, but instead felt a rush from his new head roommate - Madness. Now he was...well...whatever this was.
His skin had swirling black runes forming, dissolving and reforming under his skin like strange tribal signs but...alive. One had even branded itself over his former mutilated Grid stamp, claiming the flesh as its own rather than the Grid, and there it had stayed.
His eyes were totally dark, black as a pit and his fangs were deadly and long. As he lifted a hand to look at the changes there he saw fingers tipped with black, razor sharp claws, curved for slashing. The warrior that had been kicking his ass?
Had not stood a chance.
The fight was over in seconds as Reno found he was ten-times faster as well as stronger. His reflexes were a blur even compared to Sundown mode and he craved to feed on the warrior when the angel fell.
And then there were the tiny little things. Not a metaphor, no. There were literally really tiny little things like micro-beads of mist swirling out of his pores, from under his nails, as if his sweat had vaporized and were as much alive as he was dead.
He even heard these small black things in the form of a million whispers in his head.
Now, flexing his fingers? Claws? Whatever he had now, they swirled out again to dance over his palm with their touch like a tiny tickle to his skin. They seemed giddy but nothing like what they were when he wanted to devour the warrior.
