by Erica Ridley
Being with Theodore was easy. If he wanted something, he told her. If she did something unexpected, he went along. With him, she could be herself. He liked her just as she was, peculiarities and all. Was it any wonder she had fallen in love?
She stumbled at the realization.
He caught her.
“Shall I commission leg braces for you?” His low voice rumbled into her hair.
Not a leg brace. A metal box to hide her heart away and keep it safe. But she suspected it was far too late for armor. With Theodore, she had no defenses at all.
“Virginia?”
She forced herself to look up and meet his eyes.
His smile was victorious as he dipped his head to steal a quick kiss. “I like how you waltz.”
“I like how you kiss,” she answered, and immediately ducked her head, so he would not see the full truth on her face.
He liked her well enough up here in Christmas, far away from his peers. London was a different world. If she gave her heart to him, only for him to toss her away…
She would not be able to survive it a second time.
Chapter 10
“Come,” Theo commanded.
Duke opened his eyes, yawned, and closed them again.
“If you can learn to respond to your name and your honorific, you’re clever enough to learn other words, too.” In fact, Theo was willing to bet Virginia had taught the beast an entire vocabulary. He crossed his arms. “Come here, now.”
Duke rolled to face the opposite direction.
Theo changed tactics. “Come hither, almighty cat-beast.”
Duke let out a short purr that sounded suspiciously like a snicker.
Theo tried again. “O great and powerful—”
“You have a visitor,” Swinton announced from right behind them.
Theo jumped, and winced when the action jarred his knee. He looked over the butler’s shoulder and saw no one. “Where is she?”
“In the outbuilding.”
Checking on the partridge? Theo frowned. He’d given his word to care for it. Surely, she trusted him by now.
“And the surprise I have planned?” he asked.
“In the mews, awaiting your summons.”
“Have a footman bring it up front.”
Theo had been waiting all day for Virginia to arrive. He hurried down the corridor as fast as his leg brace and wounded knee would allow.
He caught her in the outbuilding just as she was stuffing the partridge inside a wicker basket.
“What are you doing with Dancer?”
She shut the lid. “Taking him back to the castle.”
“I thought he was my responsibility now.” Theo folded his arms over his chest. “Part of my afternoon constitutional.”
She glanced up guiltily. “I may have neglected to mention that I don’t own this bird.”
He stared at her. “I’ve been playing nanny to a stolen partridge?”
“Borrowed,” she assured him. “You were too injured to visit the aviary, so I promised to bring it to you.”
“I thought you were being metaphorical.”
“At the time, it made no difference. No one visited the aviary but me.”
He arched his brows. “Has the prospect of viewing a dozen birds suddenly become all the rage in Christmas?”
“Loads of birds,” Virginia corrected. “The new veterinarian arrived along with a sizable collection. Everyone in town has finally realized the aviary is worth visiting. You should see it.”
Theo resisted glancing down at his leg brace or touching his fingertips to the scarred half of his face. “No need. The pleasure of Dancer’s company was more than enough.”
He plucked the basket from her hands and led her through the rear entrance toward the front of the cottage.
When they arrived at the entryway, he handed the basket to Swinton. “Can you please see this partridge anonymously returned to the castle aviary?”
To his credit, Swinton asked no questions. “I’ll have it done.”
“I could have taken him,” Virginia said.
“And have them discover it was you who stole him?” Theo pointed out.
“They already dismissed me,” she said with a shrug. “Besides, I would have returned him when no one else was present.”
Of course. Theo winced. The last thing Virginia would do was voluntarily enter a loud, crowded chamber.
“While everyone else is at the castle,” he told her, “I have something I think you might like.”
She tilted her head. “What is it?”
“Christmas.” He opened the front door.
There in front of the cottage was the sleigh he had rented for this occasion. Theo had paid the owner to take a day’s holiday. One of Azureford’s footmen held the reins instead.
“A sleigh ride?” Virginia said in wonder. “I’ve always wanted to try it.”
Sleighs were a common sight in Christmas, and typically brimmed with passengers. Theo remembered she had worried about being overwhelmed by too many sensations at once. Of the possibility of making a fool of herself in front of her neighbors.
“Just you and me,” he promised. He held out his arm. “Shall we?”
She did not take his elbow.
“What if someone sees us?” she whispered. “Together.”
He did not have to parse her meaning. “You are worried about becoming accidentally compromised by me?”
“Aren’t you?” she asked.
Fear hadn’t crossed Theo’s mind. He pushed the question away, rather than examine it too closely. “It’s no different than a curricle ride in Hyde Park. Besides, we’ll be bundled in scarves, hats, and outerwear. While everyone else is at the center of town, we’ll meander through the evergreens along the edge. Just us, in an endless forest of snow-covered trees.”
“It does sound Christmassy,” Virginia admitted and lifted her hand to his arm. “I’m ready.”
Once she was bundled in the center of the sleigh, he eased down beside her. It might surprise and perhaps embarrass her to know how proud Theo was of her courage.
Things that were easy for others were difficult for Virginia, yet she never ceased trying to conquer them. Practicing dinner parties, overcoming a fear of animals to become an accomplished healer, building a new life for herself when the one she should have had was ripped away.
A sleigh ride was the least he could offer her. He loved that she loved Christmas, and would make it his mission to give her as much of the holiday as he could.
He wrapped his arm about her. The horses and driver led them away from the cottage and down a narrow trail leading to the forest.
“Should we sing carols?” he asked. “Just you and me?”
“Perhaps another day. I like doing one new thing at a time.” She nestled into his shoulder. “Right now, I am enjoying being with you.”
Theo’s heart thumped. He’d been enjoying every moment with her since the day they met. She gave him a reason to greet each day beyond London and war. She gave him peace.
He gazed at the slowly passing fields of snow-topped evergreens. The world was silent except for the soft sound of horse hooves upon the snow. The only scent in the crisp winter air was that of pine. Comforting warmth came from the woman cuddled next to him. He hoped she loved this moment half as much as he did.
The corner of his mouth twisted. She’d trusted him enough to share the most vulnerable parts of her past with him. It was time for him to come clean about his own identity. Even if it changed everything.
“I asked you to call me Theodore instead of Mr. T,” he began slowly.
She nodded. “I remember.”
“Obviously that is not my full name.” He hesitated. “I am Lord Ormondton. A major and a viscount.”
She nodded. “I know.”
“You know?” He stared down at her. “Since when?”
“Since you had me post a letter to your father.”
“I didn’t say it was my father,” h
e spluttered. “He is known as Lord Ramsbury.”
“All my friends said that Ramsbury’s son is a strong, clever, selfless, courageous hero.” She peered up at him through her lashes. “No one fits that description better than you.”
His heart gave a little flip and he held her closer. “It describes you just as well.”
Her lips curved. “I am not Lord Ramsbury’s son.”
“Care to trade?”
“There are two kinds of family.” Her voice lowered, and her gaze turned wistful. “The kind you are born with, and the one you make yourself.”
Theo hoped he was someone she would choose to keep.
“Tell me about the marquessate,” she said. “Is it large and complicated?”
“Large,” he admitted. “But I’ve been memorizing every detail since I was old enough to toddle.”
“Every detail?” She lifted her brows. “What kind of trees does it have?”
“Oak, elm, pine, juniper, plane trees, and several varieties of buckthorn.” He gave her a placid smile. “Would you like to know the percentages per hectare?”
Her eyes sparkled. “Tell me about the fauna.”
“Deer, squirrels, hares, hedgehogs, foxes, and grouse, to name a few.” His chest warmed. “One of my favorite spots is the folly overlooking the pond. No one goes there but me. It’s the perfect place to watch the sunrise or to see ducklings swim in a row after their mother.”
“It does sound perfect,” she murmured.
He wished he could take her with him.
“The marquessate belongs to my father, not me.” He gave a rueful smile. “The best I have to offer is an elegant Mayfair town house.”
“Does it have a pond in the center?”
He shook his head. “Fancy carpet.”
She clucked her tongue. “Missed opportunity.”
“Ducks might like my carpet,” he protested. “I’m thinking of having some delivered. I’m an excellent bird nanny.”
“You are an indulgent bird nanny,” she corrected. “Don’t think I missed how plump Dancer has become.”
“I didn’t know he was the castle partridge,” Theo protested. “I thought he was a hard-luck partridge, scraping by on his last feather.”
She lifted her chin. “Dancer has all his feathers.”
Theo nodded slowly. “That should have been a clue.”
Virginia patted his chest. “You’re not ready to be a bird nanny.”
He sighed. “I suppose I won’t have time anyway. Once I inherit the marquessate, I’m to become an automaton like my father.”
She wrinkled her nose. “Why don’t you become Theodore?”
“I’m already Theodore.”
“Exactly.” Her gaze softened. “I don’t see a reason for you to change.”
“That’s because you’ve never had the pleasure of one of my father’s detailed and lengthy discourses on the topic,” Theo said dryly.
“Disappointing,” she said. “I’d assumed your father to be intelligent.”
“He is intelligent,” Theo said. “He is one of the most respected and powerful—”
Why was he arguing? He didn’t have to prove himself or his credentials to Virginia. She had already accepted him exactly as he was.
It was a bewildering concept. Theo had spent his life living up to other people’s standards. Virginia didn’t give a hot fig what people like Theo’s father thought. Perhaps in part because she literally couldn’t tell, but more importantly, she had decided it was outside her control. People would think as they would.
The high regard that mattered the most to Theo was Virginia’s. It would destroy him if the woman he loved lost her faith in—
God save him. He was in love.
His body froze in place. His pulse began to gallop as if a thousand enemy soldiers had surrounded him with muskets. Their shots came too late. He had fallen, damn it all. And it terrified him.
Theo had walked away from London. He’d been carried away from war. He did not want to lose Virginia.
What the devil was he going to do about it?
Lady Beatrice had been selected for him at birth, although their personalities had always been wrong for each other. He gazed down at Virginia. No one had ever felt more right.
Theo grimaced at the impending confrontation. He and Lady Beatrice weren’t children anymore. They would discuss the matter like adults, and Theo would make her see. She had never wanted him. He had never wanted her. The only logical solution was for both of them to find a better match.
He tightened his jaw. Lady Beatrice would not understand why Theo would follow his heart rather than increase his connections. Theo’s father would not understand, either.
His heart skipped. His father and Lady Beatrice would be the first in a long line of obstacles and resistance. People would talk. Theo’s name would appear in the scandal columns. He would lose the one thing he’d worked his life to maintain: his impeccable reputation.
Even if the full truth of Virginia’s past never came to light, her emergence as his wife would cause a firestorm. Caricatures would be just the beginning.
Theo clenched his fingers. He didn’t care what people said about him anymore, as long as Virginia was by his side. She was worth everything.
The trick would be convincing her he was worth the risk, too.
“You said your London Season was unfruitful,” he began, then winced. Subtle transition to the topic of marriage? Not in the least. But now that he’d begun… “Have you considered marrying in the years since?”
Virginia blanched. “I will never wed.”
So, yes. She had considered. And the answer was no. Theo could not risk asking until he’d developed an argument capable of convincing her.
A feat, he realized with a suddenly heavy heart, that might be impossible. Virginia’s greatest fear was being discarded. Which was, in effect, what Theo would be forced to do with his current, “perfect” intended in order to be with Virginia. The very act of choosing her over Lady Beatrice could make Virginia believe Theo would one day reject her, too.
There had to be a way to prove this was different. That what they shared was real and valuable.
Virginia shivered in his arms and Theo tightened his embrace. Their sleigh ride could not last forever. The sun was setting.
“To the cottage,” Theo called to the footman.
The driver took the next break from the trees.
Theo’s eyes widened in surprise. They were closer to the cottage than Theo had realized. He looked down at Virginia.
“Have dinner with me,” he said urgently. “Not just tonight. Every day for as long as I’m here.”
And every day after. Just as soon as he figured out the best way to propose.
Virginia made no such promise, but accompanied him into the cottage.
Inside the dining room, Theo paused before they took their seats.
“Here.” He slid the small book of poetry from its secret home next to his heart. “You loaned me a book. Allow me to do the same.”
It wasn’t just a book, of course. This tiny volume was part of his soul. The part that protected him. That gave him words when he had none.
“This is…” Virginia’s eyes were wide and searching.
She did understand.
Theo crossed his arms. He already felt naked without the book of poetry to protect him. Although he no longer needed to fear enemy fire, he’d never left his heart more vulnerable.
A footman strode into the dining room, bearing not a food platter but a newspaper. “Swinton says you’ll want to see this.”
Frowning, Theo accepted the paper.
His first fortnight in Christmas, Theo had scoured its pages eagerly, hoping for news of home. Of course there was none. No one in his family had ever comported themselves in such a manner as to cause their name to appear in a scandal column. Theo had stopped paying attention.
But there, on the front page, was Theo’s own likeness. Right beneath a head
ing that read:
* * *
Presumed dead.
* * *
He sat down hard in the closest chair.
Virginia took the one beside him. “What happened?”
He pointed. “Gossip.”
According to the article—if, indeed, fiction this outrageous could be considered an “article”—Major Viscount Ormondton had been mortally wounded in France. Reports that he had still been alive when removed from the battlefield could not be substantiated. His corpse had not been returned to his family, who could not properly grieve without knowing the truth.
Bollocks, all of it.
He lifted his head. “Swinton!”
The butler materialized with the portable writing desk Theo had been planning to request.
“My ‘grieving’ parents already know I’m alive,” he told Virginia as he dragged foolscap and ink from the desk to the table. “To the rest, this twaddle will come as a shock. I’ll have to ensure everyone I can think of that there is no need for mourning.”
“Can I help?” Virginia asked. “I can post letters in the morning.”
She was right. It was dark. Nothing could be mailed until dawn. Theo pushed the papers aside. There was plenty of time to think about the right words while he enjoyed a quiet dinner with Virginia. He turned to smile at her.
Her face had gone ashen.
His stomach tumbled in alarm. “What is it?”
“You’re not the only one in the paper.” Her voice shook.
“They wrote about you?” he asked in surprise.
She shook her head. “My sister.”
He yanked the paper in front of him and scanned until he found the word Underwood.
It seemed Miss Vera Underwood, youngest daughter and the last of her siblings to marry, was now betrothed to a baron. Theo frowned in confusion.
Last of three unwed daughters.
“How many sisters do you have?” he asked.
“Three.” Her brittle smile did not reach her eyes. “There are four of us. I guess I’ve been dead far longer than you.”
Theo pulled her into his arms. It was time to come back alive.
