by Paige Cooper
“In the flesh, I can’t believe it’s you. My eyes must be deceiving me,” Joel’s larger-than-life voice boomed off of the four walls.
“Please, the phone works both ways.” I grinned and reached over for a hug.
We got into our squash positions and I let Joel hit the ball off first. The first five minutes were silent as we focused on the game, hitting the ball when it came to us and deflecting it back to the wall.
Sweat lined Joel’s brow after a few minutes, and I couldn’t resist the jab.
“Dad bod coming in already?” I teased, hitting the ball with my racket as it came whizzing toward me.
“Please, I can still outrun you any day of the week,” Joel teased back, a smile on his face as he slammed his racket against the ball.
“How are Megan and the baby?”
“Great. We’re both tired and running on fumes, but then the baby does something totally unexpected and we’re hooked again. It’s exhilarating and exhausting all at the same time. I wouldn’t give it up for anything,” Joel said, the happiness evident in his voice.
“I don’t think the domestic life is for me,” I admitted after a pause.
“That’s cause you haven’t met the right one.”
“Women are complicated. Difficult. Time-consuming. Take my secretary right now, for example—”
“Oh, tell me you didn’t,” Joel cut me off before I could finish my sentence.
“I don’t know if I did or not. That’s the problem.”
“The last time I saw you, you were determined to not have a secretary. What happened?”
“John and David. They hired this impossibly stunning woman named Nicole. She makes my coffee perfectly. I couldn’t give that up.” I shrugged, hitting the ball hard again and getting my heart racing.
“And now you’ve slept with her and mucked things up,” he said, looking at me sideways for a second before tackling the ball that came his way.
“That’s not it. I’m not sure what we did. I woke up in the middle of the night in bed with her and no recollection of what we did. Only bits and pieces, though I think it’s fair to say we probably slept together,” I mused aloud, distracted by thoughts of Nicole and nearly missing the ball that came at my head.
“Has she quit yet?’
“No. And I don’t want her to. I mean, at first, I did. But I really like this woman. It’s bizarre. I don’t like feeling this way. I don’t like having her consume my thoughts. Besides, she’s irritating. I constantly have to show her how to do things my way, and she challenges me. No one challenges me. It’s disrespectful.”
“Sounds like you’ve got it bad for this woman,” he huffed. “Maybe I was wrong. Maybe you have met the woman who’s going to change your perspective on everything.”
“Don’t you dare threaten me that way,” I laughed, pausing the game more to give Joel a break than anything. Sweat dripped down his back now, and I was sure he had missed more than a few gym sessions.
“What’s the problem, then, if you like her?” he asked me once he caught his breath.
“I don’t know how to like her. I also don’t know much about her. Besides, how do I recover from last night’s screw-up?” I asked him, looking up at him as if I didn’t know jack shit.
Which, to be honest, I didn’t. Nicole was the first woman I’d ever truly had an interest in this way.
“Don’t you have that charity thing coming up?” Joel asked, pointing the tip of his racket on the ground and leaning over it.
“What about it? I’m not looking forward to it in the first place, but I have to go. And according to brothers one and two, I need to give a speech this year.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Take her as your date.”
“What?” I scoffed. “You’re kidding? What if she says no? It’ll be absolutely humiliating if she rejects me.”
“What woman in her right mind has ever rejected a date with you?”
“She’s different. Feisty. She’s not afraid to speak her mind, and I’m nervous that I screwed up badly last night.”
“Won’t know until you ask.” Joel picked up his racket again and hit the ball toward the farthest wall.
He had a point. I could avoid Nicole all day long, but it wouldn’t help me know if she was truly interested in me or not.
I was dreading the charity event, but with her by my side, perhaps it wouldn’t be as bad as I imagined it to be.
A flashback of the night before entered my mind, and I recalled speaking about the event. I’d asked her to go with me, I was sure, but I couldn’t remember if she’d said yes or no. I would have to ask again.
I hit the ball as it hurtled toward me and grunted in frustration.
If she said no, I’d simply have her come with me as my secretary. She could hardly say no to a work obligation. I felt better about this now that I had some way to move forward, and I continued the game with renewed vigor, beating out Joel.
Chapter 19: Nicole
A s I had feared, the small headache had turned into a full-blown pounding. Work was insufferable right now.
Mark had sent through a bunch of different notes for me to take care of, and I was having a hard time getting through them. Partly because of the headache and partly because with every passing second, my anger at Mark grew.
After he’d left me alone in his love nest, I’d tried to rationalize his behavior in my mind. Maybe he was simply nervous about sleeping with another secretary, or maybe he found it awkward to face me in the morning.
Maybe there was an emergency he had to attend. Although, seeing as I organized his work and personal calendar, it didn’t seem very likely that he had left me on an emergency basis. In the last three weeks, he hadn’t even taken an evening off to get a drink—at least, not to my knowledge.
I did know he also spent Saturday mornings in the office, putting in more hours to make sure everything was in order for his cases. He worked like a dog. I supposed that would turn any potential girlfriend off of him.
I shook my head. Perhaps he thought I’d be gaga over him after we slept together. Well, he had another think coming. He was a pompous asshole, and I was itching to tell him exactly that.
Normally, Mark personally handed me the notes he needed, but today he had sent them through email. He was definitely avoiding me.
I’d hoped we would talk once I gave him his morning coffee, but even after that, he’d dismissed me callously. He was definitely avoiding me, and it pissed me off. If he would only speak to me, he would find out quickly I wanted nothing from him at all.
I was ready to chalk the night up to one night of drunken and passion-fueled fun.
The computer screen stared at me, calling me a liar even as I refused to admit the real feelings that were developing for Mark.
I typed out a few more words, slogging through the third document I needed to get done, but my mind simply wasn’t on work. It kept drifting toward Mark and his avoidance of me.
I had no idea where he had gone earlier, leaving me with no more than maybe ten words of instruction.
I took my break at my usual time, but today I ate alone at my desk. I ordered in one of those fancy salads I’d seen Abby begrudgingly eat. Hey, I could afford more than a brown-bagged sandwich at work now.
The feeling that everyone knew what happened last night overwhelmed me, and I felt like the office slut. I didn’t want to be another secretary that Mark had slept with, but I felt like the writing was emblazoned in red on my forehead.
Instead of facing the barrage of questions or feeling sick to my stomach around everyone else, I chose to eat my lunch alone and in silence. At least this way, the only person I had to face was myself.
However, an hour after lunch ended, Mark still wasn’t back at the office. This was highly unlike him, and I began to worry if something else was going on. My mind ran rampant with different potential scenarios.
As my mind stumbled over the idea of reporting his odd behavior to his brothers—who knew, m
aybe he was sick somewhere, or in an accident—Mark waltzed into the office, his face set in grim determination.
He was wearing running shorts and a sports workout tank. So that was where he’d been, working out somewhere. He always used the office gym, so it was odd to see him come back from outside of the office in his sportswear.
I hated myself for lusting after him. He was hot and sweaty as he walked toward his office, and I wanted to lick his neck, taste his sweat, and tumble back into bed with him.
Why, after 32 years of self-control, was I suddenly finding it hard to rein in my emotions when it came to Mark?
I wanted to be angry at him. I wanted to fume at him. Instead, here I was, wondering what he would look like naked and on top of me.
At first, Mark breezed right past my desk, not even bothering to look my way, and my heart sunk in my chest. But, at the last moment, he turned around and looked me dead in my eyes.
My heart raced as our eyes met and a soft smile curved onto my lips despite myself.
“Nicole, please come into my office. We have something to discuss,” he said briskly, his tone serious and businesslike.
I gathered my notebook and pen, prepared to take notes even though I hoped we would finally get to clear the air about the night before.
I stood awkwardly in front of Mark’s desk as he took his standard seat in his chair. He was probably itching for a shower and every minute we spent here was one more minute I got to watch his glorious body. The v-necked exercise tank he wore clung to his stomach and highlighted abs that his work shirts normally hid.
Working up the courage, I was about to bring up the night before, but Mark beat me to the punch by speaking first.
“You need to be my date for the charity event next Friday evening.”
That was it? That was what he wanted to tell me? I was hesitant to bring up the night before, but now I felt insulted.
It wasn’t even a question. He told me what I was going to be doing without checking in. I resisted the urge to grind my teeth in annoyance.
“Well, I’m sorry to tell you, but I can’t. Next Friday night, I will be with my dad. And even if I was free, I wouldn’t. I’d never want to go anywhere as your date.” I flung my words at him with venom, intending for them to hit their mark.
If they did, he gave no indication at all that he was wounded. He sat in his stupid chair, watching me with his stupid stormy eyes that I still wanted to fall headfirst into. Why couldn’t I turn off my attraction for this man?
“It’s vital that you’re there,” he said simply, not leaving it open to debate or question.
I felt sorry for him now. I remembered that the night before, he’d mentioned the charity event, and it had seemed as if he wasn’t happy to go. He was being put in the spotlight and told he’d need to deliver a speech.
I’d been mesmerized by his looks and charm and hadn’t paid as much attention to his words as I should have, but I recalled something about John and David having to do it every year, and now they were passing the torch to him.
Mark felt like he needed to constantly prove himself to everyone around him, especially his brothers, so he took on every task with an intense passion to do his best. I figured the charity event was only one more thing on his plate; he didn’t want to handle it alone.
My heart softened toward him, and for a brief momen, I considered saying yes. Only for a brief moment, though. It didn’t take long for me to remember that we were playing the pretend-it-didn’t-happen game, and that didn’t sit well with me.
I wasn’t going to abandon an evening with my dad simply to jump at his beck and call. I’d done that last night, and look where it had landed me. From now on, my personal time was mine, and mine alone. Mark Allen would have to scrounge up a date somewhere else.
“My personal life is important to me, too—especially my family, and particularly my dad. Nothing and no one is more important to me. I’m not going,” I said, stressing the word ‘no one’ so that he would understand he was not an important figure in my life.
“You’re coming. Discussion over.”
“The discussion is over, but I’m not going with you. I’d rather spend the night scaling and gutting fish than spend another second of my time off with you,” I announced before turning on my heel and storming out of his office.
When I had woken up that morning, I didn’t regret my night with Mark—but now I did. I regretted every single second that had led us to get into bed together.
It was a giant mistake I wished I could go back and undo. Or at least forget about. Now that I knew what he looked like naked, it was hard to erase the image from my mind.
Never in my life would I drink with Mark again. From now on, our jobs were as detailed: I was his secretary, and he was my boss. I belonged to him during work hours, but not before and not after.
If he wanted to sit there and pretend like we hadn’t slept together, that was fine by me. I was a damn good actress, too—and I’d sooner forget the night than repeat this embarrassment over again.
Chapter 20: Mark
N ever in my life did I think I’d be out shopping for formal dresses.
Scratch that.
Never in my life did I think I’d be out shopping for dresses, period.
But when the woman you liked rejected you, again and again, you needed to take things to new heights. That was exactly what I was doing now.
The fact that I couldn’t control Nicole irritated me. She did and said whatever she wanted, and it felt like I had no say.
That’s because you don’t have a say, my brain reminded me. She’s her own person.
And I understood that. Well, a small part of me understood that. But, in the grander scheme of things, it would be easier if she simply did what I told her to do.
“What about this one, sir?” One of the shop attendants approached me with a beautiful floor-length gown. It was a shimmering turquoise color, and I could already imagine it on Nicole. It would complement her skin and bring out the gold in her hazel eyes.
“Add it to the pile.” I nodded and swept my hand back to the other dresses.
This was harder than I thought. Every other dress I came across, I could picture her in—and out of.
I needed to narrow the choice down to one perfect dress. I couldn’t exactly buy her five million dresses for one event. Even I wasn’t that naive.
I returned to the pile of dresses I’d accumulated and looked at each one in turn. I could see her in every one, but something kept feeling off. Either the cut of the dress was wrong, I didn’t quite like the color, or it was too revealing for a charity event.
“What size will you need the dress in?” the attendant’s voice chirped from behind me.
“I’m sorry?” I asked, looking at him quizzically.
“The dress size. It’ll help to know the size you’re looking for. We don’t have all the sizes in stock for all these dresses.”
“Oh, right.”
It dawned on me that I had no idea what Nicole’s size was. Her body flashed in my mind for what felt like the millionth time in the span of the last hour.
I hadn’t thought to ask her for her dress size before. After all, she didn’t know I was buying her a dress to an event she’d flat-out told me she wasn’t going to attend.
The idea was to buy her a dress and make it impossible for her to refuse. The other side of the coin was that I wanted to give her something nice.
I noticed she made a lot of effort to look good at work, and it worked. But I also noticed that a lot of her things were from a few seasons ago, or possibly thrifted. I wanted to spoil her with something current and new.
I looked around the department store, trying to conjure up a figure for her size, when I spied a woman at one of the racks, flipping through blazers. She looked to be about the same height and build as Nicole. I had nothing to lose, so I cautiously approached her, waving my hand in the air in greeting.
“Hello, sorry to bother you,” I
said sweetly, flashing her a smile that normally got the jurors on my side before I’d even started talking.
The woman dropped the blazer she was holding up back against the rack and stared up at me. Her eyes shone as she took in my face and a blush crept into her cheeks.
“Hello,” she managed back, but I could tell she was a little flustered that I was talking to her.
“I’m wondering if you wouldn’t mind telling me your dress size?” I asked, and the look on her face told me I needed to provide more context. The sparkle in her eyes dissipated, and she raised an eyebrow in question at me.
“It’s a gift for this woman I’m seeing. I realized now that I don’t know her dress size, but I really want to surprise her with the perfect dress,” I added.
I didn’t know why I lied and said I was seeing Nicole, but a warmth spread in my chest at the thought of Nicole dating me and being on my arm. It was an image I didn’t want to let go of anytime soon.
“That’s so romantic. I wish I had a man who cared about me that much. My dress size is a four in this store. I hope you find the perfect dress for her,” the woman gushed.
I thanked her and wished her a happy rest of her day before moving on to the dress racks again.
A four. At least now I knew what to look for.
I scanned through the dresses I’d accumulated and decided I didn’t like a single one. They weren’t right for Nicole.
The attendant took the garments away and returned them to the appropriate racks after I shook my head no at each one in turn.
Suddenly, I had a new appreciation for women and their clothes shopping. It really was a mission to find the right things sometimes.
Frustration seeped back into me, and I was about to give up when I turned and passed a rack of Spanish-influenced dresses. The first dress was gold, with glitter and rhinestones that made it shine in the right light.
Two thin straps held the dress up on the hanger. It had a high slit, and one side of the dress was shorter than the other, in typical salsa style, for freedom of movement.
