by Sara M Zerig
That settled, Chloe resolved to not be a gushing schoolgirl. She started her day early and kept busy with basic tasks while the counselors arrived. She acknowledged each of them politely and re-focused on work. When Ritt came to the reception area to greet an appointment, Chloe kept her eyes on whatever was in front of her.
At 10:45 AM, Chloe headed to the break room. No one ate lunch that early. She grabbed her sack lunch out of the fridge and turned to find Ritt standing close. They were alone in the room. She stepped backwards into the refrigerator door.
“OK, what is it?”
His rich brown eyes seemed warmer today. The blue button up shirt he wore was open two buttons from the collar. She kept her gaze there. “What is what?”
“You haven’t looked at me all morning, and you’re running into major appliances to get away from me,” he noted. “Did I do something to offend you?”
Chloe swallowed, still staring at his collar. “No.”
“You’re not upset with me at all,” Ritt stated plainly, taking one step closer. She caught the faintest scent of cologne on his skin. She shook her head.
He leaned forward, and Chloe couldn’t help but look up. “You’re fine with my being here.”
He was standing too close, his eyes searching hers. She worked up a weak smile and nodded. He reached up with one hand, and just when Chloe thought he might pull her to him, he grasped the handle to the refrigerator door behind her. “May I?”
If death by embarrassment was a thing, Chloe would have been a standing corpse. She cleared her throat and stepped away. “Yeah.”
Her first instinct was to flee to her desk and eat her sandwich there in quiet humiliation.
No, stay.
That other voice stopped Chloe a few feet from the door. She should stay, she thought. It was acting abnormal that was embarrassing. Really, she should be making conversation with Ritt like she did with the other counselors. Maybe she would learn they had nothing in common, and that would dull her attraction to him.
Chloe sat down with her lunch at one of the two tables in the break room while Ritt grabbed a water bottle out of the fridge and something else from the freezer. He moved to the microwave. Pretend he’s one of the other counselors, she told herself. Pretend he’s Noah.
Noah was graduating with his bachelor’s degree in counseling this year. He would be working for the center full time, come summer. And she wasn’t attracted to Noah in the slightest. Summoning a particle of courage, Chloe asked, “What did you bring?”
Ritt looked her over before answering. “Frozen burrito. Steak.”
If Noah told me he was having a frozen steak burrito, I would say … “Gross.”
A half-smile tugged at Ritt’s lips, but Chloe didn’t let her eyes linger there. “Are you a vegetarian?”
“No, but frozen anything is gross. It never heats up right.” Chloe unwrapped her sandwich.
“A fresh steak would be better,” he acknowledged, pulling the burrito from the microwave.
“But no grill here,” Chloe supplied helpfully, feeling very proud of herself. Looking at something else and talking to Ritt as someone else was working, until she looked up to find him standing over her.
“Mind if I sit here?”
Chloe dropped her eyes to her sandwich, her mind-trick playing out too soon. She couldn’t pretend he was Noah, this close. She didn’t know Ritt, yet knew he was nothing like any of the guys from school. Ritt wasn’t a guy at all. He was a man.
“Chloe?”
“Hm?” She looked up and then down again quickly. “Yeah, it’s fine.”
Ritt settled in the chair across from hers and took a swig of water. She somehow knew he was staring at her even without looking up to confirm it. Seconds stretched to a full minute before he spoke again.
“I may be here through the summer. Are you volunteering this summer?”
Chloe hadn’t decided yet. It was only late March. She would receive full credit for the volunteer work by the end of May, but that didn’t mean she had to stop volunteering. “I don’t know for sure. Why?”
“Because that would be a long time of you not being able to look at me.”
That brought Chloe’s extraordinary eyes back to his. Ritt knew it would. It wasn’t nice of him to tease her, but in reality, she was teasing him. Not even teasing—more like tormenting.
Chloe showed up today in black pants that molded to every curve of her shapely legs and backside and an almost flesh-colored top. She didn’t wear much in the way of make-up, and she didn’t need it. Her skin was smooth and evenly toned; her green eyes were framed by long, black lashes. Not that he saw much of her eyes today, since she was working so hard to avoid him.
Ritt never had to do much to pursue a girl, and his occasional girlfriends weren’t long term. It wasn’t that he had been holding out for his “mate.” He hadn’t been sure that there was such a thing as a single, pre-destined mate, despite the testimony of people in his family.
It was said that mates had an instantaneous attraction to each other, but his kind was lustier than humans. Animal attraction was the norm for them. It was said that mates shared a deep emotional connection. To Ritt, that sounded a lot like what humans called love.
After four sleepless nights since the day he’d met Chloe, though, Ritt was starting to get it. This was beyond love. This was destiny. And, in his case, it sucked.
Chloe didn’t know what Ritt knew. She wasn’t feeling the certainty that he was feeling. She was confused and nervous.
Ritt wished he could clue her in on what was going on here without scaring her away. He wished he could tell Chloe that he was hers now, and she was his. So can we just get on with it already? Move in together? Start having kids?
Ritt gave himself a mental shake. Did he want kids? Chloe staring back at him with those innocently seductive eyes of hers made him sure that she would be the mother of his children. But they had a lot of ground to cover first.
Ritt held her gaze for as long as she’d let him, before Chloe began inspecting the lettuce on her sandwich. He watched her stare at her food and waited for her to say something. More torment.
“I haven’t been myself lately.” She sighed. “I don’t know why.”
Honesty. Nice. Ritt couldn’t disclose the whole mate thing yet. He could redirect her, though—give her another out, until she had time to come to grips with what she was feeling. “There’s been a lot going on around here. It affects you, doesn’t it? Personally.”
Her eyes flew to his with some alarm. “What do you mean?”
Touched a nerve. Ritt wanted to explore that, but since she was actually talking to him, he backed off. “It affects all of us to some degree.”
“Oh. Right. Yeah, I guess it does.” Chloe chewed at her lower lip a moment. “I’m normally not … like this. Can we start over?”
Progress. Ritt smiled. “Sure.”
Chapter Two
Piketon was a small touristy town that wasn’t far from Ritt’s short-term apartment. Nestled in the base of the mountain range, the outskirts of the town offered semi-secluded tree-lined roads, well-suited for his purpose. Ritt pulled his Jeep to the side of an unlit road, cut the engine, and tuned in to his surroundings through the open car window.
The rambling waters of the creek took center stage. No other cars were about. There were footfalls out amongst the pines, but they were of the four-legged variety, not two. No air-zipping whoosh of a late-night bicycler nearby. Ritt exited the Jeep.
The wildcat within him had been impatient since meeting Chloe. When the cat wanted out, he let Ritt know it with a tense energy that grew until he shifted. The days that Chloe wasn’t at the center, like today, were bad. Shifting and hunting were necessary but increasingly less helpful; the cat wouldn’t be truly satisfied until Chloe was marked as his. Neither would Ritt, but his intellect overrode his carnal desires. He couldn’t just pounce on her, although that very thought crossed his mind. Often.
It had be
en about two months since that awkward day when Chloe had told him she wanted to start over. They fell into the habit of eating lunch together on her volunteer days. Ritt wasn’t surprised to learn that she had been adopted as an infant. Chloe didn’t tell him that she knew she was different from others, and she didn’t have to. It was clear in the way she stressed to him how average and boring her life was; she was projecting who she wanted to be, not who she was.
Chloe lived with her best friend, Nikki. Nikki’s mom covered their living expenses so they could focus on their studies. It was a privileged setup, but Chloe wasn’t wealthy. Her fingers weren’t manicured, her clothes weren’t expensive, and he was willing to bet that the faded black flats she wore to the center were the only “dress” shoes she owned.
Ritt made his way into the thick of the trees and refocused on the task at hand. He paused again to listen before undressing. The landscape hadn’t changed.
The transition from man to wildcat had been awkward as a youth but was as simple as walking now. Within seconds, flesh gave way to thick black fur, and all four paws hit the ground running. All the details and concerns that had been rattling about his brain faded to black.
Game was small out here, but there was plenty of it. In less than an hour’s time, he had devoured two rabbits and a fox. He hadn’t run as far as he would have at home, the cat cognizant of the fact that he was in unfamiliar territory. But stretching his limbs and hunting in this form was a good release of tension. The cat returned to the clothes piled beneath a tree and listened for intruders before shifting back.
By the time he was dressed, Ritt’s mind was back to working through the problem of Chloe like a puzzle cube. Why her? Why did she have to live here? What was she?
After two months and twenty-some lunches with Chloe, he wasn’t any closer to having those answers. They had gotten to know each other better, but it was time to move on from the friend-zone. Ritt knew it was killing her too. He could hear her pulse race when he stood close, could scent her attraction to him so keenly it made his mouth water.
Ritt drove home without bothering to turn on the radio; he wouldn’t hear it over his own thoughts. It was just after 1 AM. In mere hours, Chloe would be at the center again. Today, he decided, things would be different.
Chloe rolled to her side and faced the clock on the bedside table. It was 1:05 AM, a full hour since the last time she had checked. She turned weary eyes to the ceiling. It wasn’t that she wasn’t tired—she was—she just couldn’t sleep. And she blamed Ritt Carter.
Chloe had decided months ago to accept her feelings for Ritt as futile. She was attracted to a man she could never have, but she knew she couldn’t have him, so it was fine. It was OK to fantasize about Ritt, if she was clear with herself that they were only fantasies. It was all right that he would eventually return to Arizona, and she would never see him again. One day, she would meet someone who was right for her and think back on her attraction to Ritt as a phase.
Chloe had come to grips with all that and got to know Ritt as a friend. Some days were harder than others, but Chloe liked talking to him. And the more time she spent with him, the less she heard that strange, third-party voice in her head. A few weeks ago, “she” or “it” stopped talking to Chloe completely.
Today she would see Ritt, and they would have lunch together. He would lean in close and say something in that husky voice of his that gave her butterflies and set her heart racing. Or he could say nothing but stand too close and have that same effect on her. Or just look at her in a certain way that made her think he wanted her too. And maybe he did want her, fleetingly. Not like she wanted him.
Chloe squeezed her eyes shut and reminded herself that Ritt could never be more than a friend. She attempted to count sheep. Cute, fluffy, happy, innocent sheep … hopping over a split rail fence on a scenic ranch somewhere. Maybe in Arizona.
Somewhere between the denials and the delusions, Chloe finally dozed off. The alarm clock buzzed her awake at 7 AM. She showered and shuffled into a black maxi dress, layering a blue cardigan over top to dress it up a bit. The scent of freshly brewed coffee beckoned to her from the first floor, and Chloe congratulated herself for having the foresight to set the timer on the coffee pot the night before.
Nikki was still sleeping. Her friend could probably sleep through a tornado, but Chloe padded softly across the tiled floors into the kitchen where cherry cabinets hung above dark granite countertops. She rummaged quietly through one of the cabinets to find a travel mug, then grabbed the creamer from the stainless-steel refrigerator.
As she poured the dark brew, Chloe thought of Ritt’s rich, warm eyes. There was a gleam to them when he smiled and a heat to them when he didn’t. The kids and parents at the center loved Ritt. He was relatable and approachable. He had a knack for reading people, for tuning in to the things they didn’t say. She wouldn’t call him a bleeding heart, but she could feel his genuine concern for the kids he counseled.
Ritt had suggested that Chloe could become a counselor. She had all the right traits, he had said. She told him that business was a better fit for her, and then they had one of those silent moments where he wanted to ask her why but knew she didn’t want to talk about it and so didn’t push. He had already surmised that she was personally affected by the kids at the center, and it occurred to Chloe that she could own up to that without mentioning the visions. But Ritt was too easy to talk to, despite his effect on her nervous system, and she was afraid she might let something slip. Ritt believed she was a perfectly normal college student, and Chloe preferred to keep it that way.
She snagged the keys to Nikki’s VW Jetta from the hook by the door and locked up behind herself. When Chloe had first started volunteering, Nikki was her taxi to and from the youth center. But the mornings got old for her friend fast, and Nikki insisted that Chloe take the car. Nikki held a part time job at a boutique downtown, but her work hours were light and rarely overlapped with Chloe’s hours at the center. Besides, Nikki had plenty of friends and boyfriends who would take her anywhere she wanted to go.
It was a nicer morning for a walk than a drive, Chloe noted. It was late May, and the weather had shifted to a pattern of perfect morning sun followed by a mid-day spike into the high 80s that would be overtaken by an afternoon thunderstorm. Chloe was all for sunshine, but by the time the afternoon rain hit, it was a relief. She didn’t love the higher temps. Seventy-nine was her max.
Ritt preferred the heat. He was an outdoorsy type who enjoyed hunting and fishing year-round. He was a family-oriented person, too. His apartment was in the same small town where his mom and close friends of the family he had grown up with lived. An only child, like Chloe, Ritt’s mother had raised him on her own. He didn’t know his father.
The dad thing was a sore subject, Chloe gathered, although no visions accompanied that observation. Ritt wanted to talk about his father about as much as Chloe wanted to talk about her eyes or why she would never go into counseling. Fair enough.
Chloe parked in the back lot, beside Noah’s car, just as Noah was getting out of it. “Hey, Chloe.”
“Good morning.” Chloe spotted Ritt’s Jeep a row behind them. He must have come in early today.
She turned back to Noah. He was a big teddy bear of a guy, tall and broad shouldered and a bit fluffy in the middle but not really overweight. He kept his blonde curls trimmed atop his rounded, cheerful face. They entered the building together, and Noah punched the button to the elevator.
“I heard you didn’t put in for an extension.”
“Extension?”
“To volunteer through the summer.”
“Umm …” No, she hadn’t. She was still split on whether or not she should, and her initial assignment was over next week. She wanted to continue volunteering and thought she probably shouldn’t continue volunteering for the same reason: Ritt Carter. The elevator doors opened to the empty reception area.
“I get it,” Noah intoned. “It’s summer, and you’ve done y
our time. It’s just that this place won’t be the same without you.”
“Aw, thanks, Noah.”
Noah made his way to the break room for coffee. Chloe settled in at the reception desk. She looked up to see Ritt emerge from his office at the far end of the hall.
“Hi,” she greeted as he approached.
“You’re not staying through the summer?”
“And good morning to you too,” she joked. He didn’t laugh. “I haven’t decided.”
“That’s not what it sounded like.”
“What what sounded like?” Chloe glanced behind him, down the hall of office doors. He couldn’t have possibly heard her talking to Noah from his office. She lowered her voice. “Did someone say something to you?”
“Are you staying or not?” Ritt asked impatiently.
He was tense and annoyed. It was so unlike him. Chloe frowned. “Are you OK?”
Ritt drew back, clenching and unclenching his jaw a moment. “No, I guess I’m not.”
With that, he retreated not to his office but to the elevator. The doors opened, and Chloe felt compelled to follow him. She waved a hand through the closing doors to stop them and step on. Ritt stared back at her, bewildered, his deep brown eyes simmering with a golden edge she had never noticed before. As the doors closed behind her, Chloe realized she had no idea what to say or do next.
Chloe had picked a hell of a time to do something bold. Ritt heard Noah’s words loud and clear, and the message received by the cat was that Chloe would soon be out of reach. Now the wildcat was practically pacing beneath his skin and gaining ground over rational thought.
“What is happening?” Chloe breathed.
Were his eyes changing? He wasn’t sure. He dropped his gaze and took a deep breath. The elevator doors opened, and Ritt told himself he would just walk past her. He’d get some fresh air, calm his mind, and come back with a reasonable excuse. As he passed, though, he caught Chloe’s elbow and brought her along with him.
