by Cindy Kirk
“Of course not,” Ryan said, a look of surprise in his eyes. “I know you were faithful to Gayle. I was just saying that Anna seems happy.”
Tripp glanced at the midwife holding the tiny baby, who was gripping her finger with his little hand. Ryan was right. She did look happy. Perhaps this one-month fake relationship hadn’t been such a bad idea after all.
The baby unexpectedly let out a mewing cry that reminded Tripp of one of the ranch kittens.
“Time to head home,” Betsy said with an apologetic smile.
Anna handed the baby back to Betsy with apparent reluctance. “He’s gorgeous, Bets. Simply gorgeous.”
“We think he’s pretty special,” her friend said with a proud smile.
After more hugs and handshakes, the couple left and everyone returned to their seats. The waitress finished taking their orders and the topic turned to Travis and Mary Karen’s retro party next weekend.
“Tell me we’re not going to have to play any silly games,” Tripp said to Travis, who sat at the far end of the table.
The popular ob-gyn physician just smiled.
His wife, Mary Karen, was more direct. “Depends on what you consider silly, Mr. Randall. I’d think you’d enjoy the chance to play, say, Twister or spin the bottle with your beautiful girlfriend.”
Girlfriend.
The charade had been a success. Everyone viewed them as a couple now. Tripp admitted it had been fairly easy for him to slip into that role. Too easy.
It’s just a game, he told himself. No harm. No foul.
With everyone gazing at him so expectantly, he took Anna’s hand in his and brought it to his lips. “You’re right. Count me in on the game playing.”
Some of the pleasure that had lit Anna’s eyes dimmed and he realized how she’d taken his words.
He leaned close, brushing her cheek with his lips. “I’m looking forward to Saturday night.”
“You’re not the only one, Randall,” Winn said, which told him the man had already secured an invitation. His gaze shifted and lingered on Anna. “I love Twister. And spin the bottle.”
Tripp turned and met Winn’s gaze head-on. Even though a smile remained on his lips, the look he shot Winn warned him to back off.
There was a responding challenge in Winn’s eyes. One that told Tripp if he didn’t keep Anna happy, Winn would.
Tripp placed his arm around the back of Anna’s chair. Although he’d planned to catch up on some work this afternoon, it suddenly seemed prudent to spend time with the woman at his side. “Interested in doing some hiking this afternoon?”
A doubtful look filled Anna’s emerald eyes. “Hiking?”
“Nothing too strenuous,” he said. “I thought we could go to Yellowstone, walk around Jenny Lake, then have an early dinner at the lodge.”
“I’m not much of an outdoorsy gal,” Anna said slowly.
He smiled as an image of the two of them under the stars flashed before him.
“Oh, I think you’re more outdoorsy than you think.” His tone took on a seductive edge. “Give it a try. It’ll be fun.”
When she nodded and smiled, a surge of triumph raced through him. He told himself he was excited because he hadn’t taken time to do much hiking this year. The truth was, he looked forward to spending the afternoon with Anna.
Far, far more than he should.
Chapter Fourteen
Anna glanced down at her green walking shorts and hiking shoes. Or she supposed they were hiking shoes. Because she’d never done any hiking, she wasn’t sure what one wore for a walk around a lake. So, she’d picked the shoes that seemed the ugliest and most comfortable in her closet.
She knew she couldn’t wear a dress, although she had some pretty ones in her closet that Tripp hadn’t yet seen. Instead she’d topped the shorts with a stretchy gold T-shirt and a plaid shirt in fall colors that she left hanging open.
Even though she thought she looked way too casual, the way Tripp smiled when he saw her seemed to indicate he liked the outfit. His cargo shorts and navy T-shirt weren’t anything special, yet her gaze couldn’t help lingering on his muscular legs and broad shoulders. She could honestly say that in all the years she’d lived in Jackson Hole, the hospital had never had such a good-looking CEO.
She’d worried she might feel awkward or be consumed with lust—like she had in church—when they were in the close confines of his truck. Thankfully, neither happened on the drive to Yellowstone.
Oh, she had to admit that her body still perked up when she was close to Tripp, and for a few minutes she couldn’t help focusing on his lips. She hoped he didn’t notice. Or if he did, he thought she was simply hanging on to his every word.
Honestly, she enjoyed their conversation. He talked about his studies at Yale and his time working for a large health system in NYC. She told him about her nursing education and how she’d decided she wanted to become a midwife after a stint in Labor and Delivery.
The only thing that disturbed her was Tripp seemed to be making a conscious effort to avoid mentioning Gayle. Anna thought about bringing her up. After all, she didn’t want him to think he couldn’t mention his own wife when he was with her, but the time never seemed right.
All too soon, they were at the park and out of the truck, ready to face the great outdoors. She shivered with sudden alarm.
Didn’t snakes hang out by water?
“Have you ever been serious about a guy?” Tripp asked, after they’d started on the path around the large lake with the shimmering blue water.
Anna was so focused on scouting for reptiles slithering on the uneven terrain that the question didn’t register at first. “What?”
“You’re a beautiful, intelligent woman, Anna. I can’t believe you’ve made it to almost thirty without being in a relationship.”
“As you know, my parents were older and a bit overprotective.” Saying the words felt wrong, as if she was dissing her mom and dad, which she wasn’t. “I didn’t date at all in high school.”
“High school was a long time ago for both of us.”
“Yes, I suppose you’re right,” she said, wondering why those years often loomed so large in her mind.
“What about college?” Tripp prompted.
Anna had tried to purge that time from her head. Especially the scandal that had erupted her senior year.
“I had a somewhat serious boyfriend,” she said in what she hoped was a casual tone.
“You obviously didn’t stay together.”
Anna realized with a start that he’d taken her hand in an almost comforting gesture. With him beside her the sick feeling she got when she thought back to her college days didn’t seem quite so pronounced. Or maybe the bad memories were finally beginning to fade. After all, that, too, had been such a long time ago.
“What happened?” Tripp prompted.
“Matt had a Jekyll-and-Hyde thing going.” Anna tried to keep any bitterness from her voice. She thought she’d succeeded until Tripp gave her hand a squeeze and slanted a questioning look in her direction.
“At first he was sweet,” she said with a sigh. “Then everything changed.”
“What happened?”
His curiosity told her Gayle had kept the story to herself, as she’d requested. Betsy knew the truth, too. But they were the only ones she’d told.
An air of watchful waiting hung heavily between them.
Before answering, Anna lifted her face to the sun and let the warmth seep into the deepest recesses of her soul. Even though she hadn’t thought she’d ever tell him about that time, Anna suddenly wanted to explain. Needed to explain.
She felt close to Tripp. And she didn’t like having secrets from someone she lo—well, from someone she considered a dear friend. Anna knew the risk she’d be taking in
coming clean. He might listen to her story, then walk away in disgust. It would be worse to see the disappointment in his eyes.
Yet, she would tell him. Soon. Before she lost her nerve. They reached a clearing. After scanning the ground, Anna stepped close to shore. She stared out over the endless blue but found no pleasure in the beauty surrounding her.
“You don’t have to tell me.” Tripp moved behind her, wrapping his arms lightly around her waist.
She leaned back against his broad chest, drawing strength from his warmth. “Matt was a physics major,” she began haltingly after several more seconds had passed. “I had a part-time position working for several professors in that department. That’s how we met.”
She tried to picture him in her mind, but after all these years the best she could come up with was a mass of rumpled dark hair and intense blue eyes. “I’d gone out with other guys, but after a couple of dates, I’d always lose interest.”
“He was different,” Tripp said against her hair, his voice giving nothing away.
“I think that was part of the appeal.” Anna pulled her brows together. “He was so into me. I was flattered by the attention. No one had given me that much notice before. He was brilliant and handsome and he wanted me.”
Tripp’s only response was to stroke her arm.
“While all the attention he gave me was really great, it was also overwhelming at times. And a little...scary.”
Tripp’s hand halted midstroke.
“We were always together. My college girlfriends had quit calling. He didn’t like my hanging around with them anyway.” Anna’s tone turned wistful. “I didn’t have any family. With my oldest and dearest friends far away, there was just...him.”
Tripp remained silent, allowing her to continue at her own pace.
“He had a temper. He’d get so angry with my stupidity, as he called it.” Anna sighed. It had taken several years of therapy for her to understand why Matt had been so successful in dismantling her self-confidence.
Anna felt Tripp’s body tense. She didn’t wait for him to respond. “Midway through second semester Matt told me there was something I needed to do for him. Didn’t ask. Told me.”
“What did he want you to do?” Tripp’s voice was tight with control.
“Nothing big.” Anna gave a humorless laugh. “Just get him a copy of an upcoming midterm exam off his professor’s computer. Apparently Matt wasn’t as smart as I thought, because he was only pulling a B in that course. Such a low grade in his major could have impacted his choice of graduate programs.”
“What did you tell him?”
Had Tripp asked, or had she just imagined the words?
“I said no. He was shocked. He tried everything to change my mind...including getting physical.” She brought a hand to her cheek. While Anna may have blocked out Matt’s facial features, she could still feel the sting of the hard slap that had turned the whole side of her face numb.
“He hit you?” Tripp’s voice shook with a fury that made the leaves on the nearby trees quiver.
Anna gave a jerky nod. “Thankfully, one of his roommates came home just then and I ran out the door.”
“Did he come after you?” Tripp’s hands tightened around her arms.
She gave a little squeak. “Tripp, you’re hurting me.”
“Oh, sorry.” He immediately loosened his hold and expelled a harsh breath. “That bastard should be—”
“Anyway.” Even though this was ancient history, the rapid pounding of Anna’s heart made it feel as though it had happened yesterday. She licked her dry lips. “I spent the night with a fellow nursing student. He called my cell thirty-two times. I didn’t answer. The next day he came to the physics department where I was working. He had a bouquet of flowers and was all apologetic and contrite.”
“I hope you told him what he could do with those flowers.”
“I—I was confused.” Anna closed her eyes and expelled a shuddering breath. “Remember, he was my life. Or so it seemed.”
“Oh, Anna.”
Her knees went weak at the caring in his voice. But her relief was tempered by the knowledge he still didn’t know the full story.
Anna drew a deep breath, determined to press through to the end. “Shortly after Matt arrived, I took a call for one of the professors. The young man—who I learned later was Matt’s friend—said it was crucial he speak with Dr. Douglass as soon as possible. He said he’d tried everything to reach him. I told the guy I could leave a message on the professor’s door so he’d see it the instant he got out of class and returned to the office. Matt said he’d wait. By the time I got back he was gone.”
“Good riddance,” Tripp muttered.
“I settled back to work and immediately noticed someone had messed with my computer,” she continued, ignoring his comment. “I worried Matt had gotten the test after all.”
“Wasn’t your PC password-protected?”
She nodded miserably. “He knew my password. We’d joked about the silly one I’d chosen months earlier. My suspicions were confirmed when a cheating scandal erupted.”
Her eyes grew hot. Without another word, Anna pulled herself from Tripp’s arms. She returned to the path that encircled the lake and began to walk. Anna had thought she’d made peace with that time in her life, but the surge of emotion fueling her steps told a different story. Angrily, she brushed unwanted moisture from her eyes.
“Anna.” In several long strides, Tripp reached her.
When she turned and he saw the tears, he pulled her to him and hugged her. “It’s okay, sweetheart. It’s all good.”
Anna’s heart lodged in her throat. Tripp hadn’t called her sweetheart since the night they’d informed everyone they were “a couple.” But that had been part of the charade. This felt real.
“Matt and several others were kicked out of school.” Anna sniffled and swiped at her eyes, determined to regain control. “Administration determined a group of students had gotten their hands on the test. They suspected it was through me, but couldn’t prove it. Still, I lost my job. Being fired was...humiliating. I saw the look of derision in the dean’s eyes, heard the disappointment in his voice.” She shuddered.
His gaze searched hers. “Did you tell them what you suspected?”
She shook her head. “I was afraid I’d get kicked out, too.”
“Why?”
“I’d given Matt my confidential password,” she reminded him. “I’d left him alone in the office, giving him the opportunity.”
“You couldn’t have known he’d do something like that—”
“Couldn’t I?” She breathed the last of her secrets, the one that had niggled at her for years. “Perhaps I secretly wanted to give him access. That way I could make him happy without being directly involved.”
“No.” Tripp’s response was swift and sure. “That’s not what happened.”
“How can you be so certain?”
“Because I know you.”
She shrugged.
“What were you feeling that morning?” Tripp asked. “When you saw...him?”
It was as if Tripp couldn’t even bring himself to say Matt’s name.
Anna thought for a moment. “Anger. Sadness.”
“Did the flowers soften you up?”
“A little,” she admitted, wanting to be completely honest. “I’d never gotten flowers before. He insisted he hadn’t meant to hurt me, that his hand had...slipped.”
“Slipped, my ass.” A muscle in Tripp’s jaw jumped. “Did any of it change your decision about helping him?”
“No,” she said firmly.
“Would you have left him alone in the office if you’d known what he had planned?”
Anna shook her head.
“There’s your answer,
then,” he told her.
“But maybe deep down—”
“Anna, no. Don’t torment yourself over this. It was a long time ago and it’s over.” His lips curved up in a gentle smile. “Even if you had helped him, we all make mistakes. We learn from them and move on.”
“You don’t hate me?”
“I could never hate you.” He trailed a finger down her cheek, then kissed her lightly on the lips.
The truth will set you free.
The doubts that had dogged Anna for many years slipped away in a rush of emotion. She lifted her face, wishing Tripp would kiss her again. Instead he took her hand and they began to walk.
After a couple of minutes of silence, he slanted a sideways glance. “Was there anyone after college?”
You, she wanted to say. Instead she lifted a shoulder in a slight shrug. “Work has always kept me busy....”
She let her voice trail off. She’d dated, but no one who touched her heart. That was, until she’d contacted Tripp a couple of months after Gayle had died. It had been a courtesy text, to show support and see how he was holding up. To her surprise, slowly and a bit awkwardly, an online friendship had ensued.
They’d grown close, via texts sharing thoughts and feelings that would be impossible to say in person. She’d had high hopes when Tripp had moved back to Jackson Hole. But from the second he arrived, he’d taken a step back from her. That was, until he’d approached her with this one-month-relationship idea.
“Have you dated anyone seriously since Gayle died?” she found herself asking. Even though he’d shared a lot via text messages, she wasn’t foolish enough to assume he’d told her everything.
“Not really.” His eyes were focused on the distant mountain peaks rather than on her. “I probably should jump back into the dating pool, but right now I don’t have the time.”
“You have time to see me,” she pointed out.
“Yes,” he finally said. “But we’re not trying to build a relationship.”
His words were like a hard punch, a blunt reminder that no matter how close she felt to him, no matter how many times he called her “sweetheart,” he wasn’t envisioning a future with her.
