by Kristi Rose
Caroline poked a finger into his bicep. “Please don’t go down this path again. Do you really want to be connected to that family? The mother is…well, awful is such an understatement. Her sister, Elizabeth is—” Caroline shook her head. “I can’t even find the words. All the sisters are something else. And I don’t mean that kindly.”
“I am aware of how you feel, Caro. But I don’t feel the same way. Particularly about Jane.” He glanced around the crowded room. A party was not the place for this conversation.
Caroline stomped her foot. “Please don’t be a ridiculous fool and make our family look bad. I beg you to let common sense prevail.” From a side pocket on her dress she pulled out her phone. “I’m going to get to the bottom of these videos and prove to you once and for all how right I am.” She tapped her screen a few times.
Bingley looked over at the phone and saw a giant microphone on the screen. “Is that a recording app?”
Caroline nodded.
He covered the phone with his hand. “That’s disturbing, Caro. Diabolical even. Recording someone without their permission—”
Caroline pushed his hand away. “I’m not doing it for court purposes, you moron. I’m doing it to show you that what Jane says to you and what she says to others is the same thing.”
Bingley struggled to keep his tone from sounding terse. Knowing his sister, she'd take his anger as a challenge. “What you are forgetting is that I don’t care what she says to other people. I won’t listen to anything you record. It's wrong, and what you’re doing is reprehensible.”
“I’m only trying to protect you.”
Bingley shook his head, frowned down at his sister, and said, “It doesn’t feel like it.” He turned on his heel and stalked away.
Chapter Eight
Jane surveyed the room but paused to watch Emma introduce Mrs. Bennet to several couples. Jane assumed these were the people Emma intended to pair. When observed with a non-emotional eye, the events at Emma’s were no different from what she and Lizzy did with Meryton socials. They brought people of like interest together to see if chemistry might take over.
Jane did a head count and, sure enough, she and Elizabeth had evened out the numbers. Curious, she wondered whom Emma had in mind for her. How did Emma even know what Jane was looking for in a partner? At Meryton, Elizabeth and Bill did extensive interviews and got to know their clients before exposing them to an event such as this.
Exposed. That’s how Jane felt as she stood among Emma’s partygoers. Jane wasn’t sure of the rules. People she didn’t know knew her, and she couldn’t help but liken the experience to being undressed and out for the world to see.
It was the same feeling she got when strangers brought up her videos. They’d been easy enough to make. After all, one of her sisters had been behind the camera. Plus, she’d been thinking a lot about dating and her own assumptions and apprehensions, so she found talking about those points helpful. The videos had given her a forum to air her fears in a way that felt non-threatening, and liberating to a certain degree. Jane was not prone to sharing her feelings with anyone and everyone who would listen. Only Lizzy saw her raw underbelly, and even then it was a glimpse. Not that she didn’t trust Lizzy. It was more the vulnerability of being exposed. To feel everyone’s eyes on her and wondering what assumptions they were making. How odd that sitting in a dark room, talking about dating to her younger sisters, had been easier than late night conversations with a trusted, secret-keeping sister. Maybe it was because the videos hadn’t felt real. She never imagined sharing that bit of raw humanity to the world would make her a trend.
Jane glanced at Bingley; he was talking to his sister and Margaret Elliott. Catching sight of Charlie still caused her heart to flutter. Only now it was followed with an ache in the center of her chest, a pain that squeezed her heart like a vice. Left to speculate on why he took off was exhausting. She'd hoped journaling, putting her fears into words, would have provided some sort of release. But no release came.
Elizabeth said something, and Jane faced her, not processing her sister’s words. She was too lost in her own thoughts. “Say again?”
“I’m going to look for a restroom. I need a moment to collect my myself.” Elizabeth chewed her lower lip, her eyes darting around the room.
Jane grabbed her arm. “Don’t leave me here, Lizzy.” Panic started to build within her.
“I won’t. I promise. I need ten minutes, though. Can you manage that?” Elizabeth removed Jane’s hand from her arm and squeezed it in hers.
“Yes, of course. I can find a dark corner to fade into.” She quickly looked around the bright room. “Or maybe a couch or something. I’ll be all right.” Because she had to be. The look on Elizabeth’s face reflected what Jane was feeling inside, the unfamiliar sensation of spinning out of control. “But you must come back.”
“I’ll be right back,” Elizabeth whispered, gave her hand a final squeeze, and then let go before rushing from the room.
They were pathetic as far as matchmakers went. Being here was harder than Jane had imagined when Anne pitched the idea. How naïve she'd been. Jane walked slowly to the bank of windows, hoping she looked like a woman enjoying herself, relaxing.
Outside, everything was white and blinding, the snow covering every possible inch of the ground. Jane debated what she’d rather do, brave the outdoors and snow or stay inside and face this crowd and the damage her mother or Caroline Bingley might do.
She felt someone beside her before they touched her shoulder and, without looking, knew it wasn’t Charlie. It stung he hadn’t sought her out, but his actions gave weight to her beliefs. He didn't like her.
“Excuse me, Jane?” Frederick asked behind her. He came to stand closer, leaning against the wall next to the window she was looking out. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but I need your help.”
“With what?” She crossed her arms over her chest, rubbing her hands up and down her arms to warm herself.
Immediately Frederick took off his sports jacket and offered it to her. She shook her head. “I think it was looking at all that snow that made me cold. Thank you, though.” Looking at the snow, maybe, but thinking about Caroline and Charlie had definitely sent a chill through her.
He tucked his jacket over his arm. “Forgive me for being this forward, but I’ve watched every video you’ve made. More than once for some, and—”
Jane groaned. “Those videos were such a bad idea.”
Frederick shook his head. “I’m sorry to hear you think that. Those videos helped me come to my senses. Those videos helped me understand Margaret better and the severity of my actions.”
Jane cocked her head. “What do you mean the severity of your actions?” She couldn’t imagine Frederick doing anything illegal or heinous.
“Your sister was spot-on when she matched Margaret and me. She really is the perfect girl for me.” He gave Jane a sad smile. “I knew she was right away. I fell hard.”
“So what happened?” Jane moved to sit on the window ledge.
“Stuff like this happened.” He nodded to the crowd. “These are Margaret’s people.” He gave a short laugh at his own joke.
Jane recalled something Caroline had said earlier. “And you and I aren’t.”
“No matter how much money you have or make. I see that now. Let me explain. After dating Margaret for a while and attending functions with many of these same people, I couldn’t shake the sense of not belonging. I'm in shipping and I do well enough, but not this well.”
“Did you ask Margaret if that mattered?” Jane knew the answer.
Frederick pressed his lips together and shook his head. “It wouldn’t have mattered, but her protest would have fallen on deaf ears. I was determined to make sure she continued in the life she was accustomed. So, without telling her what my intentions were, I took off. I spent the last five months doing more”—he coughed slightly, followed by a subtle throat clearing—“aggressive runs.”
“And you made a l
ot of money.” Jane recalled Caroline’s comparison of Frederick’s new money to her old money.
“Yes, but nothing illegal, of course,” Frederick assured her.
“And where do I come in?” She was intrigued by his declaration that the videos had helped. She’d heard this before from other people now and again, but now she was listening. She needed to change the way she felt about those videos. She needed to find something good, or else anytime anyone, Caroline or Charlie in particular, brought them up, she’d be too embarrassed to defend herself.
“Watching your videos helped me see the truth about my situation and my insecurities.” He smiled wryly. “It’s taken me a lot to admit I have those, you know.”
Like Lizzy had been telling her, Jane’s videos resonated with others because they were having the same fears and doubts.
Jane squeezed his arm. “It hard for all of us to admit such things.”
Frederick shook his head. “You made it look easy. Anyway, I also realized you and Margaret are similar in nature and, because of that, I now ask you, I beg you, to help me reconnect with Margaret. Maybe give me some insight on how I can make it up to her. Explain what a dufus I am so she’ll forgive me and not run away from me, as she should. She deserves someone better than me.” He ducked his head briefly before looking up, his attention across the room. “But I want her, and I want her to want me again, too.”
Jane turned and saw he was looking at Margaret, who was talking with Emma. Though Margaret wasn’t facing them—she was sideways—Jane knew by the frequent but slight turn of Margaret’s head in their direction that she was aware of Frederick. That was a good sign. He was still on her radar.
Direct action was what was needed. No more tiptoeing around each other, speculating what the other might be thinking or speculating on the purpose of the other’s actions.
Jane clenched her teeth. The irony that she needed to take her own advice when considering her actions toward Charlie did not escape her.
She was about to tell Frederick her plan when Caroline interrupted them yet again.
“What do we have here? A lover’s tête-à-tête?” Her words were cold. “You two are spending a lot of time together today. Is there something we should know?”
Jane scanned the room, looking for a way to escape. Charlie was walking across the room, his back to them. Lizzy had not yet returned. Emma caught her eye and gave a fluttery wave of her fingers. Jane sighed with resignation.
Frederick looked at her, worry creasing his forehead, and pushed up from the wall. He was smart to be cautious around Caroline. Jane had only just learned that lesson. She searched for a reason to give Caroline but then realized she owed the woman nothing. She didn’t need to explain one single conversation, action, or friendship. She was about to inform Caroline of this when Frederick chimed in.
“We’re simply chatting, Caroline. Getting to know one another.”
“Is love blooming here? Do you find our Jane to be the same sweet and open woman that she portrays in her videos?” She tapped a finger on the back case of her phone.
Jane couldn’t stifle her groan. “What’s your real issue, Caroline? Do you wish you could be in the videos? I can’t work out why they upset you like they do.” Particularly when others were saying how much they enjoyed them, how refreshing the videos were.
Caroline snorted with false laughter. “Certainly not. Be in a video. It’s so…common. So desperate. Half the world has seen them. ‘Jane Seeks Man’ is what they should be called. Jane just puts it all out there, and men like you, Frederick, fall instantly in love. Why, I’m guessing she'll have her pick for the future Mr. Jane. Isn't that what you wanted, Jane? How will you eliminate the men you don’t want? It's more complicated than handing out roses like that tacky show on TV.”
Over Caroline’s shoulder, Jane glanced toward Charlie who’d come to a sudden stop. He then swiveled on his heel and come toward them. She glanced between the siblings. It was hard to believe they were related. He was so kind: she was so wicked. A wild thought struck Jane. Unless Charlie did a good job of hiding his true feelings? Unless Caroline and Bingley were cut from the same cloth? The thought was horrifying.
“Tell us, Jane, which man have you set your sights on now?” Caroline leaned closer, her negativity palpable and pressing against Jane. Caroline continued, “Who's going to give you the payout?”
Jane surveyed the woman. Though they were close in age, Caroline's pinched expression and chronic down-turned mouth made her look older. Pity for the woman swept over her. What was she getting from life that made her so bitter and cutting?
Frederick bumbled his words as he tried to come to Jane’s defense. Jane put her hand on his forearm to stop him.
“Actually, Caroline. They weren’t videos about finding Mr. Jane, as you so cutely put it. But more about how hard it is to be single. How scary it is to put yourself out there repeatedly, hoping not to get rejected. You might know something about that. Dating is not for the weak.” She looked at Charlie who’d just arrived. “What disappoints me is that people misconstrue the videos and my intention. I would especially hope that if someone took the time to get to know me, they would see the videos for what they really are.” She returned her attention to Caroline. “If you’ll excuse us, I see a friend of mine that I think Frederick would like to know better.”
With her hand on his arm, she tugged him behind her and across the room to where Margaret Elliott was chatting with the man Jane had met earlier, George Knightley.
Chapter Nine
Jane approached Margaret with a hesitant smile and slightly raised brows, a gesture she hoped conveyed she wanted to join them. Margaret might have been casting furtive glances at Frederick, but that didn’t mean the woman wasn’t going to throat-punch him upon arrival. Frederick had royally stomped on Margaret's heart. Though George was talking, Margaret watched Jane and Frederick approach, her eyes darting between them. Since Margaret didn't glare, snarl, or turn away, Jane took that as an invitation.
“Hi,” Jane said to Margaret and George, her hand still grasping Frederick’s forearm. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but I was wondering if you remember me, Margaret?” She increased the size of her smile to show that she wasn’t a threat. “It’s been forever since we last saw each other at that party.” Margaret Elliott was a petite woman. Next to Frederick she looked delicate. Her glossy brown hair, fair skin, and brown eyes were unremarkable but gave her a warm and friendly vibe. She was dressed simply in a classic navy wrap dress with a kelly-green cardigan.
Jane watched realization dawn on Margaret’s face before she continued, hoping to ease Margaret’s fear that Jane wouldn’t out her for using a matchmaker company. “Frederick reminded me we’d all met there, and I thought that was a funny coincidence. I’m happy to see you again, and Frederick said much of the same.” She gave him a nudge.
Frederick bobbed his head a few times, so Jane nudged him again. “Yes, I’m very happy to see you.”
Jane linked her hands behind her back, keeping her body language non-threatening. She didn't want Margaret to think Jane was competing for Frederick. She didn't want anyone to have the same thoughts. “How have you been?”
Margaret’s attention darted between Jane and Frederick before a tentative smile crested her face and her shoulders visually relaxed.
“Tell them about the fantastic fundraiser you and Bingley just ran. Quite an achievement,” George said.
“If she won’t tell, I will,” Charlie said, coming from behind Jane and moving to stand next to Margaret. He put his hand on her lower back in a way that was both familiar and possessive. Jane felt Frederick stiffen next to her and realized she’d done the same, her arms dropping to her side.
Margaret said, “We raised over eight million dollars to help fight childhood homelessness.”
“That’s why I went to the West Coast a few months back,” he explained to Jane.
Jane felt the urge to roll her eyes. “That’s the only reason?
” Couldn’t have been. Why disappear without so much as a goodbye if one was leaving to do something admirable.
Charlie briefly ducked his head, and when he looked back up, his gaze went to something across the room. Jane looked over and saw Darcy standing across the space. She assumed Charlie was looking at him.
“No,” he said. “That wasn’t the only reason. I had work to do. But the fundraiser gave me the diversion I needed while there.” He gave Jane a meaningful look. Trouble was, she didn’t know what it meant.
A burst of anger shot through her. “Well, how fortuitous for the homeless kids that you needed a distraction,” Jane said and crossed her arms. Although she hated confrontation, she hadn’t been able to keep the words in her mouth. Anger was a strong and careless motivator.
“That’s not what I meant,” Charlie stammered out the words.
Jane shrugged. “That’s what you said.” She didn’t know why she was being so combative. Maybe she was the one who would throat-punch someone. Maybe, knowing he took counsel from his sister, a spiteful person, was making her angry. Maybe because, despite it all, she continued to be madly, hopelessly, into him.
Stupid heart.
Charlie went to say something, but Margaret cut him off. “With the money, we have been able to renovate a twenty-unit apartment building to provide homes for families with children. It's the first step to help them get back on their feet. The funds help cover school clothes, medical expenses for the children, transportation to needed appointments, and provides counseling to parents,” Margaret said.
“Sounds amazing,” Frederick said softly.
“Margaret runs the foundation that now funds it. I was more than honored to be a part of the project,” Charlie said.
A silence hung between them. Jane searched for a starting point aimed at bringing Frederick and Margaret back together.