by C. M. Albert
“You think he would?” I asked, looking around. “Where did he go anyway?”
She shrugged. “Who knows. He could get lost in books and office antiques for hours. He’s probably still over there.”
“You okay from earlier?” I asked. I didn’t mean to pry, but it was obvious that there was tension between them back at the house. “You seemed upset.”
Olivia swallowed, picking at the cuticle on her thumb nail. “I’m okay. Just a misunderstanding.”
“I’m not that misunderstanding, am I?”
She looked up, the faintest smile lifting her sensual lips. “Why, Brighton, don’t you think highly of yourself.”
I shrugged, giving her the smoldering look I usually reserved for women at bars. Liv burst out laughing, deflating my ego. “Damn, you know how to gut a guy.”
She stood, laughing still, and put her arms around me in mock-comfort. “There, there,” she said, petting my hair. “Does that actually work these days? It’s been so long since I had to bring out my A game.”
“You don’t have anything to worry about in that area,” I said huskily.
Her laughter died on her lips as she looked up at me, each of us lost in each other’s eyes, with so much more emotion swirling behind them than either of us could express.
A throat cleared, causing us to part quickly. Louie was standing there with a doorbell, his eyes wide.
“Whatcha got there?” I asked, trying to play it off.
“A doorbell,” he said, holding it out and not saying anything else.
I took it from him and smiled, but Louie didn’t reciprocate. Well, shit.
“I’m going to go get Ryan. He found a desk he wants for his office, and I needed to grab the price for him,” he said, looking at Olivia.
“Oh, where is he? We’ve been looking all over for him?”
“I could tell,” he said, turning to leave.
Olivia started to say something, and I shook my head, telling her not to. I ran a hand through my hair and cursed. I didn’t care what Kent or Louie thought of me at the end of the day, but I wouldn’t have them think bad of Olivia.
“You go find Ryan. I’ll go talk to Louie.”
“What exactly are you going to say?”
“That it’s not what it looks like,” I said, sighing.
“Isn’t it though?” she asked, biting the corner of her lip. “He’s not stupid. And every time you look at me, you look like you want to have your dirty way with me. That didn’t escape Louie, trust me.”
I moved toward her again, walking us both back until we were out of sight from the main floor, nestled behind a row of old, wooden doors. I pressed her up against the rough surface of the barn and lifted her hands above her head, holding her in place. Our pulses raced, and I could feel the thump of our hearts with each rise of her chest against mine.
“Brighton—”
I never let her finish. I crashed my hungry mouth down onto hers and stole, devoured. My tongue lashed at her mouth, begging her lips to part for me. Her hips arched off the wall and pressed into mine, and finally, finally, she conceded, parting her lips and letting me in. I hovered over her, taking more and more from her with each stroke of my tongue. It was animalistic, something dark and dangerous that we’d not shared before. It was a stolen moment in time that we might regret later, but while we were melded together, we consumed as if it were our last breath.
I finally pulled away, resting my forehead against hers while we came down from the high we were chasing. Our breaths mingled as we panted, my hands still gripping hers above her head against the wall. “I will never apologize for wanting you,” I told her. “But you are going to be my undoing, Liv.”
She closed her eyes, and I wanted to kick my own ass for taking so much from her. I knew the guilt would weigh heavy on her heart and Ryan would eventually find out. But in that moment, I didn’t care. I just wanted more of her. And the worst part? I wanted her to myself the next time.
“You’re already mine,” she whispered before sliding out from under me and going to find her husband.
Chapter 30
Ryan
I’D OBSERVED THEM several times during the day, Kerrington and Liv never the wiser. Even a casual outsider would be able to feel the current of electricity that pulsed between them. I tamped my jealously, though, because Olivia was my wife. And no matter how great the sex was between the three of us, he would never have her alone. So, I gave them their space, because I knew they needed to find certain pieces for Kerrington’s house. I lost track of time looking through the antique book collection they had. Kent usually always held at least one gem aside for me, and today was no different.
He handed me the brown-clothed hardcover book, The Scarlet Letter written in gilt on its spine. My hands shook as I opened the cover and peered inside.
“It’s a first edition, second printing,” Kent explained. “Made in 1850. In surprisingly good shape, all things considered.”
“Where did you find this?”
“Estate sale. Little old lady had a massive library. I tried to curate the entire thing, but her relatives wanted most of the books to go to libraries and museums. I managed to get this one and a few others I’m saving for you.”
“How much?” I asked, already knowing I’d buy it no matter the cost. Kent did, too, and he never took advantage of that fact because he knew he had a consistent customer in me.
“Twelve hundred. And that’s a steal.”
I nodded. “How much does the first printing go for?” I asked, knowing Kent would have the answer off the top of his head. He was as much of a book junkie as I was.
“About sixteen thousand.”
I whistled.
“Doesn’t mean someone will pay that. Just means that’s what they’re asking.”
“I’m glad you didn’t find that printing, then. Liv would have my head on a silver platter.”
Kent laughed. “Speaking of Liv . . . how are things going? I know she was in a place the last time you guys visited. She looks much happier now. Whatever you’re doing seems to be working. What’s your secret?”
If he only knew.
“Must be my witty personality and dashing good looks,” I joked.
Just then Liv walked over, out of breath. Her cheeks were flushed from the exertion. “I’ve been looking for you everywhere.”
I loped an arm over her shoulder and kissed her temple. “Sorry, babe. I got sidetracked back here.”
She laughed. “You always do.”
“Where’s Kerrington?”
“Uh,” she said, looking around as if she hadn’t a clue, “I think he went to find Louie. He grabbed a few more items for the house, and I think they’re loading everything in the trailer.”
“Will there be enough room for a desk?”
“You really found one you want?” she asked, surprised.
The one currently in my office was passed down from the professor before me, and the professor before that. And while I appreciated the legacy, it was just plain ugly.
“Yep,” I said unapologetically. I couldn’t wait to get rid of the Beast, as I’d affectionately named it. “You’ll love the new one, I promise.”
She leaned over and whispered into my ear. “I kinda had a fondness for the old one.”
I groaned. “We can always make new memories.”
We loaded up the desk and a few items Liv found for her own warehouse stash she kept stocked for clients and staging homes. Then we met Brighton by the truck. He was holding two watermelon slushies in his hands for us, and Louie was standing there with their signature popcorn tube filled with steaming hot nuts. I wish I were kidding. They were the best, though, if you liked hot, candied pecans. Which Liv went nuts over every time.
She stood on her tiptoes and kissed Louie goodbye on the cheek, then she climbed into the cab. I saw Louie pull Brighton aside and say something, clapping him on the back after they’d chatted a few minutes. He looked into the cab directly at m
e.
“Keep on keeping that lady of yours happy, Wells. She looks mighty pretty smiling again.”
Liv blushed, and I nodded. I wish I could take all the credit for that smile, but considering I wasn’t with her for most of the trip, I’m quite sure Louie had just witnessed the Brighton Effect. I tried not to let it eat me alive as Kerrington drove us home, he and Liv singing along to Tom Petty in the front of the cab. Somehow, hearing a song about free-falling when my wife and I were sharing a bed with another man wasn’t in any way comforting. I tuned them out, thumbing gently through the delicate pages of my book. A passage caught my eye, and I nearly sobbed.
Love, whether newly born or aroused from a deathlike slumber, must always create sunshine, filling the heart so full of radiance, that it overflows upon the outward world.
It was as if Nathaniel Hawthorne was whispering from his grave. If Brighton was the new love, ours was the one aroused from slumber. Either way, the result was the same: Livy overflowed with happiness again, her heart creating sunshine everywhere she went. Louie and Kent had both seen it. I saw it every damn day. While it gutted me that I alone wasn’t the reason, I couldn’t be mad at Kerrington for being part of the solution I’d asked him to help with.
“We going straight home?” I asked them. Two sets of eyes found mine through the rearview mirror. Then they found each other’s. Something silent passed between them that I really, really didn’t want to know the answer to today.
All I wanted was to wrap my arms around my wife again, with Brighton enveloping her, and lose ourselves in a world where no words were needed, but every sentence our bodies uttered spoke of an undeniable, inner-woven connection that was beyond comprehension. Beyond our control. I knew in my bones we were teetering on destruction, and that we needed to nip this in the bud, soon. But I also felt the warmth today after basking in the sunlight that was Olivia when she was happy.
And I would do damn near anything to hold onto that for just one more day.
Chapter 31
Olivia
I PICKED UP my husband’s copy of The Scarlet Letter. It was nearly two in the morning, but I didn’t dare take Stitch outside tonight. It had been a week since the last time the three of us had been together, and every time I was around Brighton, I was like a lit fuse. I didn’t trust myself these days.
Why had Ryan left this out in the sunroom? Was it purposefully for me to see? Or maybe that was my own guilty conscious speaking. I still hadn’t told Ryan about the kiss I’d shared with Brighton alone. I knew I had to, but the thought turned my stomach. I’d had no excuse for what I’d done.
So, why then couldn’t I stop thinking about the way his lips seared mine when we were alone? I lifted my fingers and touched my bottom lip as if I could still feel his mouth consuming mine. It was utter annihilation, that kiss.
“You daydreaming?” Ryan asked from the doorway.
I dropped the book to the floor and gasped, scared I’d ruined it. But the spine was still intact, and the book had landed perfectly on its back, staring up at me. Don’t you look at me like that! I hissed silently to the book.
Ryan bent over and picked it up.
“I forgot to show you this last week when we got home,” he said. “We got a little distracted.”
Had we ever.
The sex that night had been explosive. There was no other word for it.
I couldn’t shake the feeling that we were all holding secrets beneath the layers of passion we were sharing, though. The energy had been so magnetic; we were so desperate to hold on to one another, as if we were all afraid that this was the last time.
And it had been.
A week had passed, and we’d hardly seen Brighton. I was scheduled to go over later this morning for the installation of the tin ceiling. He was working with the contractors, but I was laying out the design and directing the install to make sure everything looked beautiful, given the age and inconsistent wear of the tiles.
“We need to talk,” Ryan said simply, staring down at the book.
“What’s up?”
Stitch bounded up, hopping onto the porch swing to sit beside me, his head folding over onto my lap with a contented sigh. It gave my worried hands something to focus on as Ryan sat down beside me.
“We haven’t really processed everything together.”
I nodded. I knew it was only a matter of time. But somehow, I’d lived in my own little dream world these past few weeks, not wanting to desecrate the perfect little bubble I was in—getting to have my cake and eat it too. Truth be told, there was nothing in this world that would make it okay if the tables were turned. I wasn’t sure how Ryan was able to compartmentalize everything. I was certainly struggling.
“Let’s talk then.”
The way Ryan was staring back at me—completely vulnerable and raw—made me realize I was fooling myself if I thought for a minute that he was successful at compartmentalizing any of this. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” he answered automatically. Then he laughed when he saw my face. “Okay, no. Maybe? I don’t know, Liv. I just feel like we need to talk about this like adults and be honest. This isn’t something you can just sweep under the rug and act like it never happened. We chose this path for a reason.”
“I agree. I just don’t know what to say.”
“Me either,” he said. He lifted my hand, then kissed the back of it. “It’s been amazing, though. I never knew I could find even more reasons to love you. But I feel like you’re more open now since we started this. It’s like I’m getting to see all these new sides of you.”
I smiled. “You always had a way with words.”
“I mean it. Even Louie and Kent could see it.”
My heart sank. They’d seen it all right. I just hoped they’d kept it to themselves.
“You are happier, right?”
I thought about what he was asking. I was happier lately. It didn’t negate my losses, or how often I thought about our babies. But I was happier. Was it because of what we’d done? Had it really been the catalyst I needed?
“I am,” I admitted quietly. “I don’t know if it’s all because of what we did. But I think it’s a big part of it. I think you trusting me so fully and being willing to expose yourself like that—that takes so much vulnerability, Ryan. All so I could be happy.” I looked down at my hands, unsure how to say what was really on my heart. “That’s unheard of. I’m so grateful to have you. And that you didn’t give up on me.”
“I’d never give up on you,” he said, pushing the hair away from my face. I leaned into his open palm, not wanting to rock the boat. “Was it what you imagined?”
I bit my lip and nodded. “More.”
“I want to put it all behind us, Liv. But the truth is, I can’t stop thinking about it,” he said, his voice low and heated.
“At least you’ll never run out of fantasy fuel, right?” I teased.
He growled, leaning forward and biting my lower lip. He set the book onto the coffee table and moved Stitch off the large porch swing. Then he turned the overhead light off and pressed me back into the mound of pillows.
“Ryan, I thought you wanted to talk,” I whispered.
“I do. But I want to be with you even more right now. I don’t know why, but Kerrington makes me blind with jealousy somedays. Then other days, I’m so grateful for him—because he brought you back to me. And I can’t get the images of the way you look when you’re lying there, giving and receiving from both of us, out of my head. You’re seriously the hottest woman I’ve ever known. The way you can handle both of us. Jesus, Livy.”
He pressed my hand between his legs so I could feel what the thought did to him. “I want you so bad, baby.”
“Out here?” I asked. The lights were out, but I had no idea if Brighton was asleep or if he was waiting in the yard like he still did some nights for our “Insomniacs’ Club” meetings, where we ended up talking for hours about everything and nothing.
“It’s our house, we can
fuck anywhere we want,” he said, running his hand under my nightgown. He parted my thighs, and I couldn’t stop the sigh as my eyes fluttered closed. “Besides, it’s not like its anything he hasn’t seen before.”
He dropped his sleep pants and lay down beside me in the pitch dark. His lips closed over mine to absorb my moans as he pressed deep inside of me. No matter how torn I was feeling these days, I couldn’t deny my love or attraction for my husband. And it had increased because of Brighton. The only problem was it also increased for Brighton.
“Tell me what turns you on, Liv,” he said, pulling his hips back and thrusting inside of me. “When he touches you. What makes you hot?”
“You don’t really want to know this, Ryan. Just make love to me. Give me you tonight. Just you. You’re all I’ve ever needed.”
“You’ll always be mine,” he growled. I wrapped my legs around his waist as he increased his pace and gave up trying to think of anything but the two of them. As my orgasm climbed, I had to bite his shoulder so I didn’t scream out and wake up the whole neighborhood. He lifted my hips and pressed deeper inside of me for a few last thrusts. Until a low, guttural moan ripped through him, Ryan’s body arching with his release. He dropped his weight and fell against me, sweaty and spent. I lay there, stroking his hair as he embraced me, as if he never wanted to let me go.
“Do you wish you could have him all to yourself?” he asked suddenly.
“No,” I whispered, kissing his temple.
His lips found mine and kissed me more tenderly this time. “I only wanted to make you happy.”
“And you have.”
“Good. Then it’s over, Liv. I can’t share you anymore. It’s just you and me from now on. Okay?”
