by Liza James
"And who are you to decide where she belongs?" Her voice becomes a firm reprimand and I narrow my eyes in her direction at the sudden outburst. "There's always a little light in the darkness, a little evil tainting the brightest of suns. Nothing and no one is ever completely good or entirely evil." Her gaze falls back to Lucifer, who's hands are trailing around the front of Stella's waist.
Stella’s watching me though. She’s always watching me. Her pale blue quickly phases, ghosting into the alluring white that immediately calls to my own phase. We aren't even bonded and I know what she's doing, what she's asking me.
It's always the same question. We're back to this place again. Because even while she's angry, she's drawn to me. Even when she hates me, she belongs to me. I want own her body, ravage her spirit, and then fuck her mind in the only ways that matter.
All the ways that make her fucking mine.
He sees me. He's watching while I dance with the man who just mentally tortured me not long ago. But in this, it's harmless. I can tell because while Lucifer dances with me, his eyes stay glued to Esme. But she watches with mild interest on her face, keeping her eyes on his while him and I move and grind against each other.
I don't care about them in this moment though, because my Succubus is released full force here. She's engulfed me, swallowing my mind and working herself through my limbs. I'm feeding from the overflowing spill of sexual tension. No one holds back. No one has regrets. I’ve never felt so free. The overwhelming pressure that usually tightens within me is released and I’m high on the liberation. This is a world brimming with abandon, and I want to let go.
I'm still angry, in fact, I'm fucking pissed, but I'm also hungry and aching to finally give into this wildfire that blazes through Nathanial and I.
I beg to let the flames burn us the fuck up.
So, while I dance with Lucifer, while my hands slide up and around his neck, my eyes beseech Nathanial to come claim me. To dominate and punish me for whatever the hell he thinks I deserve.
The music is a ghoulish blend of harmonizing voices, defiling the air and intoxicating every part of me. I lose myself to it, to the rising power that's blooming in my stomach.
And for the first time, the very first time, he gives it to me. My heart hammers against my chest like a trapped winged creature. I would say a bird, but that seems far too innocent for how I feel. This is more like a bat, or a dragon, thrashing against my bones to the point of pain as I watch him take another step. And then another. And another.
He's intimidating, and I hear Lucifer's arrogant laugh echo in my ear as Nathanial gets closer. I take a sharp breath in as he nears me, my lungs begin inhaling and exhaling a little faster than before while I watch his strides.
He's fucking hot. So unbelievably sexual in each move he makes. His eyes never leave mine as he finally reaches me, his chest coming flush against my breasts while his hand tightly grips my chin so that I'm looking at him.
"Go the fuck away," he says to the Devil, not even acknowledging Lucifer with a glance. But just when I think he won't listen, he releases his hold on me and steps back, leaving me alone with a man who invokes equal parts arousal and terror in this moment.
"Tell me why you lied," I whisper as Nathanial steps even closer and crowds my space so that it's only him I see, only him I feel. He releases my chin and spins me around so that my back is pressed tightly against his chest, his hands slide down the front of my thighs and then back up, his thumbs drifting dangerously close to my core as we begin moving to the music.
He dips low and his hand slowly rises up to my jaw as he turns my head back so I can look at him. "It's a long fucking story," he says, his lips so temptingly close that they brush against my own. A slight tremor slips across my back and icy goosebumps erupt across my skin.
I pull away from his hold just slightly, but he immediately tightens his grip on my jaw and drags me back to him.
"Don't even think of running away, baby girl. You wanted me here, and here I fucking am." His voice drops lower, alarmingly dangerous in the way he silently holds me hostage.
"I didn't ask for you," I challenge, knowing it's useless, but wanting the fight anyway. Wanting the fucking struggle of our power and foreplay.
He laughs as his teeth bite and scrape against my bottom lip, pulling it out before he lets go with a sadistic pop. "Did you just lie to me?"
"You've been lying to me this entire time. So why don't you start with the goddamn truth and we can go from there."
"You want the fucking truth, Stella?" This time, he's angry. I can hear it in the way he bites out the words and leans away from me. I'm grating against his nerves, pushing the boundaries he's always so firmly placing between us.
But I do want it. I need it.
He groans in frustration as he roughly turns my head to watch the people in front of us. "Do you see them? The man and woman with the horns," he says the words in rage. His hand tightly holds the front of my face while his words grind against my ears.
I do see them, a man and woman, her body moves seductively over his while his hands explore her flesh. She arches her back, his hand slips up to catch her tit, tugging and rolling her nipple through the thin fabric of her sheer top. He has long, back horns that twist and burst from his head, while hers are smaller. Two little red, sharpened points that emerge just above her hairline.
"Yes," I whisper. My body responds to the show naturally. Arousal pools in my lower stomach, wetting my inner thighs and soaking my panties. I'm turned the fuck on watching other people get off, but even more so when Nathanial forces me to do it. I can feel his cock thickening in his slacks, pushing against my ass with every move we make together.
"Those two, he's a true Incubus and she's a true Succubus. You and I, we're different. You were born of two different bloodlines. But I was turned into this several years ago when I made a deal I couldn't back out of." He tenses behind me as he lets his words sink into my consciousness. I try to process what he's saying, that he was transformed into what he is now. But it doesn't make sense, he's an Angel.
"What deal?" I say, my voice softening into a moan as his hand leaves my throat and slips down to my waist. He drags me against him, and I push back into his touch, letting my hand drift up so that I can pull his head down towards me. I want the nearness of him, the intimacy.
"When Elijah and Amelia Fell, I wasn't supposed to go with them. I was supposed to stay in Arcadia," he replies as his lips brush against mine again. I lean up on my toes, frantic, desperate to taste him. He lets me, capturing my mouth with his briefly in a kiss that’s punishing and raw. His tongue sweeps inside as I part my lips, crashing against mine as his hold on my waist tightens. He pulls away as he continues speaking, giving me the truth I so badly wanted. “I couldn’t let them go without me, not when it was my fault Elijah Fell to begin with. So, I came to Lucifer, and offered something in exchange for the transformation. He used Esme to complete it, she had access to a dark magic that allowed the demonic nature to take root inside of me. After it was complete, I wasn’t allowed back in Arcadia. I was exiled, but Elijah believes that I Fell for interfering alongside him and Amelia when we found you.”
God, the memory of them finding us floods my mind. Sometimes I forget that we’ve known the three of these Fallen Angels far longer than we ever realized. Suddenly, his words truly process, and I worry that he’s avoiding saying something I don’t want to hear. Something I don’t want to believe he gave up in exchange of Falling. Fear courses through me, that maybe I’ve been right all along. That maybe someone can be Fated, without the other person reciprocating those emotions.
Fuck, no. Please no. I can’t bear the thought that he’s been lying to me for good reason, avoiding hurting me until he had no other choice. Until he brought me here, until I broke at the scene of Lucifer’s fucking game and every single nightmare I had manifested in front of my eyes.
This is him letting me go. Telling me we aren’t Fated, that it’s time I move the f
uck on and forget about whatever this was.
Tears sting my eyes and I shut them tightly, sucking my bottom lip into my mouth and biting down in order to inflict my own pain, distract me from what’s tearing me apart inside. “What did you trade Nathanial? What did you give up?” The question burns my throat on the way out, searing my lips and polluting the space between us. My heart plummets in my chest, bursting in an entirely different way than before.
I don’t want to hear him say it. I need to hear him say it.
His forehead crushes mine as he whips me around so that I’m facing him. He wraps his arm tightly around my lower back, crushing me against his torso until my chest is flush against his. We’re both breathing heavily, my beat in sync with his own. I fist my hands in the front of his dress shirt. It’s parted at the top where several of his buttons are released, giving me a hint of his muscular chest and golden skin. I want to touch him, feel the heat radiating off him while we’re like this.
But it’s painful and I’m afraid his flesh will burn me. “I take it back, don’t say it. I don’t want to hear it,” I whisper as the tears spill from my lashes and slip down my cheeks. I taste the salt on my lips, stinging the bite from his teeth when we kissed. He lifts one hand and wraps it firmly around my hair, tugging my head back and into his palm in a raw grip.
His powerful chest vibrates with a thundering growl as his biceps flex and bunch while he tightens his hold. Anger electrifies his body as it comes alive in front of me. His muscles clench and release, the tick in his jaw bounces uncontrollably, his head pushes painfully back on my own as he stalks us towards the edge of the room.
“You need to hear it. You need to listen to me,” he demands as my back smashes against the hard wall behind us. He crowds me in, punishing me for this damned situation we’ve both found ourselves in.
I wait, aching over the words I know are about to spill from his lips, letting the tears fall and opening my eyes to meet his hard gaze. I recognize the pain in them, the searing torture that’s pulling us both apart. It’s reflected in my eyes as well.
“I traded my Fated. The connection I would have with someone else in order to Fall with Elijah and Amelia.” His voice is rough, jagged and sharp with painful words that wreck us. My head falls back against the wall as I shut my eyes tightly.
“Then tell me this is real, what we have. Do you feel it? Or has it only been me this entire time?” I bite the words out angrily, because I’m fucking pissed and God, I’ve never felt more alone than I do now.
I’ve never belonged. Always the outcast, the odd one even now in this new life. Luna has Elijah, but she’s always been independent. She took care of me when I needed her most and I always tried to do the same for her, but I’ve never found my little corner in the world like other people do.
Hell, the closest I’ve felt to belonging anywhere is in this room, with these people who all feed from the same energy I do. I’ll always belong with Luna, but I need to find my own life as well. At one point, I thought that was going to be with Nathanial.
Nathanial’s hand slides up to the bend in my shoulder, his thumb dragging along the skin of my collarbone. He pushes against my flesh until he’s kneading the muscle, working me over while he drags the tip of his nose up my neck and down into my hair. He breathes me in, and I work to memorize this moment, remember the feeling of his hands on my body.
“Of course, I fucking feel it. It thrives and burns in everything you do. In the tiny gasps that fall from your lips when you phase, in the way your hands drag across my skin when we touch, in the moans and cries you surrender when I take them from you. Hell, even in your sleep, in the way that you fucking breathe. All of it calls to me, begs to be completed and dominated in all the ways I could give you.” His knee shifts in between my thighs, coming to press tightly against my core. He leans down, releasing his hold briefly enough to gather my dress by the hem and drag it up my legs until it’s no longer a barrier between us, just draping over my sides.
“I would possess you, Stella. Destroy you in order to put you back together in a way that ignites your spirit and frees your mind.” My breath catches in my throat, arousal courses through my veins at his words. Fuck, I want him. And even though we can’t satisfy our Fated connection, at least I know he fucking feels it there between us.
But before I have a chance to respond, to tell him I don’t give a fuck about that as long I can still have him, everything silences and falls into darkness around us. The lights die, the music fades, and then gasps and screams erupt in the space.
I yelp in fear after being plunged into obscurity. I feel Nathanial’s body still pressed against mine, but a new worry begins lacing my blood at the uncertainties of what’s happening. Nathanial isn’t even concerned by the lack of light though. His touch grazes up and into my hair, his thumb possessively trailing along my jaw line until he brushes it across my lower lip, tugging it down before he releases.
He laughs, a quiet dark sound that sends shivers down my spine. “Are you afraid of the dark, baby girl?” he whispers gravely as he turns my head to the side, holding me still and at his mercy. “I hope not, because we’re staying here tonight. And there’s only enough room for darkness and sin in a place like this.”
A jolt of thrill electrifies my limbs, filling my mind and spiraling through my body. I’m on fire at the deadly promises, the severe tone to his voice calls to every need inside of me that only he can fulfill.
“He can have it back,” Lucifer’s provocative voice breaks through our tension, slicing it cold as I try to find him in the dark. But I can’t see anything, and I only hear the rough and ragged breaths of Nathanial as his lips move across the skin at my neck. He isn’t slowing down, he’s giving into this just as much as I am. “His Fated connection. I just want something in return that he promised to meet in the case that he ever found his match.”
In an instant, I want to do it. Whatever it is, whatever he needs for us to bond, I’ll fucking give it.
“What is it?” I ask, desperation and desire thickening my tone.
“No, Stella,” Nathanial says admonishingly. As if he’s putting me in my place and not allowing this to go any further. “It’s not your issue to try and fix.”
“Rule a portion of my Underworld. You and Nathanial, together.”
Rule a portion of Hell. As if it were that easy.
My heart sinks, absolutely plummets to the pit of my stomach. I don’t know what that would entail, what that would mean for Luna or my life on the upside. I lift my hand and find Nathanial’s face, letting my fingers slide across his skin and around his neck in order to tangle in the silky strands of his hair.
“Shut the hell up, Luc.” Nathanial bites out at the same time that he moves to grasp either side of my face, tilting my chin up so that our breaths are crashing together. He returns the conversation to me, “This isn’t the place for you. It’s too dark here.”
Lucifer continues to interrupt while my thoughts twist and wind through my mind. “I take offense to that, it’s pretty fucking great here. As you can see. I’m all about orgasms and parties. And taking what I want when I want it.”
But Nathanial fights back, “It’s not for you, Stella. You have a life on the upside. One I promised I would get you back to.”
I’m torn between wanting to give up everything to have Nathanial in all of the ways I can. But also not wanting to sacrifice what’s happening above. I can’t, not with Amelia also going through her own shit. Not with the new sightings of Sunan, and Elijah stepping in as leader with my sister. I have to keep an eye on her, keep Luna safe while we all live in the same house.
But fuck, I want to succumb to everything here tonight. I want to give in, let it go and let the darkness corrupt me. “Okay, I’ll go back. But tonight, I want this. I want you to show me the darkness. After you’ve lied, and pushed me away, and rejected me when I needed you.” I pause, tugging on his hair while I grit the words out through tight lips. “I want you to fuckin
g feed me, Nathanial. Like I know you can.” I know he’s always holding back, never giving into me fully. Fuck that, not now. Not now that I know he’s been lying to me about everything.
He growls against my neck, his teeth grazing and biting down on my flesh while Lucifer laughs in obscurity around us. “You’ll be back little one, I have no doubt about that. Have fun tonight,” he finishes before vanishing entirely.
Nathanial suddenly grips my waist and lifts me over his shoulder, locking his arm around my knees while I cry out in surprise. “You want to fucking feed, baby girl? Fine, but you better be ready to choke.”
My heart races as we walk through the darkness, my arms clutching onto his back while he moves as if he knows exactly where he’s going. “How the hell can you see? Where are you taking me?” I shout over the loud and crazed voices around us. The music is still off, until I catch a quick glimmer of aqua blue, a small hypnotic flame that bursts before it disappears. Suddenly, the music returns, and the strobes are back. In the place of the flame stands Esme, her arms crossed tightly around her chest while a quiet smirk plays along her lips.
Nathanial stalks down a narrow hall, another one lined with several doors scattered on both sides. This pathway though, has torches lining every few feet, extending from the brick walls and lit with deep purple flames. Each torch is linked to the next by a series of chains, and Nathanial walks us all the way to the end of the hall until he turns into the last doorway on the left. He kicks it open, dropping me to the floor before he slams it shut behind us.
“Stand over there,” he orders as he nods his head to the other side of the room. I quickly turn around, truly not ready for the scene that surrounds me. I try to take everything in as I hear the soft click of the lock bolting in place. He’s shutting us in, making it so that I can’t escape. I can’t run from this.
The room is dark. Cold drafts of air slither across my bare shoulders as my eyes slowly scan the area. Countless candles are lit and scattered about, some in tall candelabras while others melt directly onto the brick shelving that holds it. Purple flames dance around the room like tiny flickers of magic.
