by Rob Loveless
Cal arrived at his apartment just after two and took his packed bags out to his car. Once it was loaded, he laid the Christmas gifts he had purchased on his kitchen table and began wrapping them as the minutes ticked closer and closer to six.
At five thirty, Cal could not procrastinate any longer, and he determined that he would need to leave in a few minutes to arrive at his parents’ house on time. He decided to change into some of the new clothes he had bought a few days earlier and he threw on a pair of dark-washed jeans, stylish winter boots, and a white thermal shirt that complemented his toned body. Then, Cal threw on his coat, carried the wrapped gifts out to his car, and left his apartment.
Cal arrived at his parents’ home just after six and saw what he assumed to be Andrew’s car already parked in the driveway. Cal’s body trembled a bit as he pulled his keys out of the ignition, and he drew a deep breath.
You’ll be fine, Cal reassured himself as he retrieved his luggage and the wrapped gifts from the trunk of his car. He knew he would be seeing Andrew and had spent the last week preparing for this moment. Sure, it would sting to see his ex again, but Cal couldn’t let that affect him. He had to prove to Andrew how much better off he was without him—even if Cal doubted that himself.
“Gotta fake it till you make it,” Cal muttered aloud before he opened the front door and stepped into the toasty home.
“Hello?” his mother’s voice echoed from the kitchen, over the clinking of dishes. “That better be my son walking through the door.”
“It is,” Cal responded as he removed his coat and set his things off to the side.
“You’re late,” Mrs. Adams stated, still unseen in the kitchen.
“I know. I’m sorry,” he apologized as he walked into the kitchen and was bombarded by an array of scrumptious aromas. His mother was bent over in front of the oven, tending to dinner.
“Oh my God! Look at you!” she exclaimed when she stood up and faced Cal. “You look great!”
“Thanks,” he chuckled lightly.
“New hair. And, oh, you’re growing your beard back,” Mrs. Adams remarked and pinched Cal’s cheek before giving him a maternal peck.
“Hey, Cal,” his father called from the staircase, “I saw that new car in the driveway from the window upstairs—”
“New car?” his mother wondered.
“Is that yours?” Mr. Adams asked.
“You bought a new car?” she questioned.
“Yeah,” Cal replied to both of his parents.
“Nice!” his father exclaimed. “What year is it?”
“You bought a new car?” Mrs. Adams repeated. “What? Are you having a quarter-life crisis?”
“It’s only a year old. And I told you my car died on me last week.”
“Yeah, but you didn’t say you got a new car.”
“Well, what was I supposed to do? Drive around with a rental?”
“I didn’t say that, but your car only died a week ago. That’s awfully fast to—”
“What’s the engine like?” his father called, now staring at the car from the front door.
“It’s really nice, Dad. Want to take it for a ride later?” Cal offered. Mr. Adams, who rarely ever splurged on purchases, always received a thrill of excitement whenever a neighbor or family friend bought a new car.
“Yeah!”
“All right, well not now,” Mrs. Adams replied. “It’s almost time for dinner. Claire and Andrew are waiting in the dining room.”
“I’m gonna put my bags in the guest room,” Cal stated and left the kitchen, while his mother fiddled with a pot on the stove. He traipsed up the stairs and deposited his luggage in the guest room before he sank onto the bed. To his surprise, Cal’s anxiety had almost completely subsided. Instead, he was emotionally exhausted from keeping up this charade. Nevertheless, he refused to appear vulnerable to Andrew, so Cal mustered up all the positivity he could find deep within himself and headed downstairs into the dining room.
“Cal!” Claire called out an excited greeting, as she leapt up from her chair and hugged him. “I love the haircut…and the scruff.”
“Thanks,” he replied with a smile and then turned toward Andrew. A slight pang of desire welled up inside Cal, but he silenced it as he offered his ex a hug. “Hey, Andrew. Great to see you again!”
“Uh, yeah. You too,” he replied. Andrew seemed to have been thrown off by Cal’s composed, sociable demeanor compared to the last time they had seen each other, but he recovered as Mrs. Adams bustled into the dining room with a sizzling roast and began to serve dinner. Cal took his seat at the table, but not before he noticed Andrew quickly eye him up and down, observing—and perhaps lusting for—this new and improved version of himself.
Per usual, Mrs. Adams had outdone herself and cooked up a delectable meal. Cal was pleased to discover that unlike their previous family dinner, this one went much smoother. The conversation had remained pleasant and Cal avoided any awkward interjections. Maybe he could fake his way through this week.
After dessert—a mouthwatering tiramisu—Claire volunteered to wash the dishes, despite their mother’s protests. Cal sat at the table with his parents and Andrew, and the group sipped their coffee while chattering away about the upcoming holidays. However, Cal’s courage soon ebbed as he made eye contact with Andrew, so he excused himself to assist Claire.
“Hey,” she greeted him as he entered the kitchen, carrying in the last few dirty plates with him.
“I thought I’d lend a hand,” he offered.
“Great, thanks.”
As the siblings scrubbed away at the scraps of food stuck on the dinner plates, they discussed their current endeavors regarding school and work. As their conversation subsided, Claire bit her lip.
“Um, can I ask you something?”
“Sure, what’s up?” Cal inquired.
“I’m not quite sure how to ask this,” she began, “but do you like Andrew?”
“What—?”
“Last time he was here, things seemed a little awkward…and you seemed a little dismissive of him.”
“Oh. Uh, yeah, I like him,” Cal assured as he swallowed hard. “He seems like a great guy.”
“Really?”
“Yeah!”
“Okay, good,” Claire breathed in relief as she placed a serving tray in the dishwasher, “because your opinion really matters to me, and I like him. A lot.”
“Oh, nice,” Cal replied, and for a moment he felt weakened despite the confident exterior he had been attempting to display that evening. “Are things pretty serious between you two?”
“Yeah,” she beamed, as if she was a young schoolgirl experiencing her first innocent crush. “I’ve been in relationships before, but I’ve never felt like this. I don’t know what it is, but there’s just something about him.”
“I know exactly what you mean,” he said.
“So, what about you?” Claire probed, as she sensed her brother’s minor dismay. “Are you seeing anyone?”
“You know me, Claire. I’m always seeing someone,” he answered with a slight chuckle.
“Well, are you seeing anyone worthwhile?” she pressed.
“I’m not sure yet,” Cal said. With Jacob in mind, he wanted to say yes, but Andrew had begun to creep into his thoughts again. “I’ll be sure to let you know when I figure it out.”
“There are my wonderful kiddies. Thank you so much for doing the dishes,” Mrs. Adams said as she walked into the kitchen with a glass of wine—her third that night—in hand.
“Mom, it was nothing,” Claire dismissed.
“Well, I appreciate it,” their mother replied. “Oh, you two look so cute standing there together. Let me take a picture.”
“Ugh come on, Mom.” Cal said.
“Oh, would you just shut up and humor your mother,” she retorted as she pulled her cell phone from her bag. “Okay, move a little closer together and smile.”
Cal put his arm around Claire and the two smiled while t
heir mother fidgeted with the phone’s camera.
“Oh shit. How do I turn on the flash? Oh, wait. There we go. Okay, ready? Smile,” she instructed as she snapped the picture and examined it. “Oh, would you look at that. I really do have gorgeous children. Let me show your father. Hey, Todd, look at this.”
Cal and Claire rolled their eyes in unison and attempted to stifle their laughter as they finished washing the last of the dishes.
Later that night, after everyone had gone to bed, Cal remained downstairs to relax and ruminate in silent tranquility. He went over to the liquor cabinet and poured himself a whiskey—his father’s favorite—before he retired to the family room. Cal settled himself on the couch in front of the lit fireplace and was quite cozy dressed in his lounge pants and hoodie. He gazed into the gentle flames as he sipped his drink.
The night had gone better than Cal expected, though his defense had worn a bit thin toward the end of the evening. Andrew had definitely been eyeing him up throughout dinner, which did little to ease his anxiety. Cal had succeeded in showing his ex what he had missed out on. However, that no longer seemed to be enough for Cal. He almost wanted a second chance with Andrew, though he knew he was being irrational and hurried to force his lustful thoughts out of his head.
Cal pulled his phone from his pocket, to distract him from these thoughts. He opened his messages and smiled as he read through his conversation with Jacob from that day. He was a gentleman with a good sense of humor, and treated Cal well—something he was seldom used to. More importantly, Jacob seemed invested in him and interested in getting to know him more.
Cal had begun to accept that he had feelings for Jacob, and he tried to focus on that so as not to let himself fall for Andrew again. This was the first time in a long time he had a rational crush where there were no red flags, no excuses for poor behavior, and no faked feelings. This had the potential to become something real, and Cal didn’t want to risk losing that.
His attention was diverted from the crackling fire as a creak resonated from the adjacent staircase.
“Hey,” his father said as he entered the family room. “I thought I heard someone down here.”
“I’m just having a nightcap,” Cal informed him as he tilted his glass.
“Mind if I join you?” Mr. Adams asked.
“Not at all,” he replied as his father poured himself a whiskey before taking a seat on a nearby reclining chair.
“Oh, that’s good,” he said after sipping his drink. “I feel like I didn’t get a chance to talk with you at dinner. Your mother tends to dominate the conversation.”
Cal laughed.
“How are things with you?”
“Can’t complain,” he replied before taking a swig of whiskey. “The gym’s still closed, so that sucks.”
“Do they have any idea when it’s going to reopen yet?”
“Not yet. It’s nice having some time off from work, but I’ve been feeling kind of stir crazy lately.”
“Is that why you bought a new car?”
“Dad, no. My car died and it was time for an upgrade. And I got it for a pretty good deal.”
“Good, so you’re not going through some quarter-life crisis?” Mr. Adams teased.
“Not yet,” Cal chuckled.
“Glad to hear. I’d hate to see you go through a life crisis at such a young age, since you have a lot of great things going for you.”
Cal scoffed at his father’s remark.
“No, I’m being serious, Cal. You’ve got an education and a good job. You’re responsible with your finances, and you’ve got your health,” Mr. Adams commented.
“Well, that’s not everything,” Cal said to himself before sipping his drink. His father eyed him and took a quick glug of his own beverage.
“Cal, can I ask you something?”
“What?”
“How come you never bring anyone around?” he wondered.
“What?” Cal repeated as he choked on his whiskey, having been caught off guard by his father’s question. His palms grew clammy around his almost empty glass as he realized what his father was getting at.
“You’re twenty-five years old and a good-looking guy, so I’m assuming you date,” Mr. Adams remarked. “So how come you never bring anyone around? Your mother and I would be happy to meet whoever you’re dating.”
“Who says I’m dating anyone? Maybe I’m a loner.”
“Well, if you were dating someone…”
“Dad, it’s not that simple.”
“Why not?”
“Because, it’s just not! Okay?” Cal retorted in an unintentionally raised voice.
His father took the cue that Cal no longer wanted to speak about the topic and grew quiet, though he appeared dejected.
Cal eyed his father and felt a bit guilty. Though he had always felt uncomfortable talking about his dating life with his parents, perhaps he was being somewhat selfish by keeping that from them. Maybe they did want to know from time to time if he was seeing anyone. Cal emptied his glass, sighed, and then spoke.
“I do date, Dad, but it’s never anything serious. I wish it got to the point where I was in a serious enough relationship to bring someone around…but…”
“But what?” he father inquired.
“But,” Cal said before biting his lip. He wasn’t at all drunk; he was barely even tipsy. However, as uneasy as he was, he still had the urge to divulge a secret to his father—a secret that only Sophie knew. “Okay, the truth is I got hurt…bad. About three years ago, right around the time I was graduating. I really liked this…guy who acted like…like he really liked me, but then he would pull away. I always blamed myself for it and thought it was because of the timing.
“But I realized he was just a player. Or at least I thought he was. I don’t know, but stuff has happened somewhat recently with that situation, so now I don’t know what to think. Anyway, I’m not sure if I ever got over it. And that’s why I’ve never had a serious relationship.”
Though he was somewhat embarrassed, Cal was relieved to have disclosed this information to his father, after years of building walls to seal off his dating history from his family. Still, he avoided eye contact and stared into his empty glass as he waited for Mr. Adams to speak.
“Well,” his father began and set down his drink, “I hate to sound cliché, but everything has a way of working out in the end, and if it wasn’t meant to be, it wasn’t meant to be.”
“Yeah, you’re right,” Cal concurred.
“And honestly, this guy sounds like trash,” he continued. “I wouldn’t want a guy like that around you. I wouldn’t want a guy like that around Claire. You guys deserve better.”
“I know.”
“Don’t worry, you’ll find it when you least expect it,” Mr. Adams assured him. “Do you see the way Claire and Andrew look at each other? That is love. And you’ll find that someday.”
“Do you think they’re actually in love?”
“Oh, I know it,” his father replied with a curious twinkle in his eyes.
“Can we talk about something else?” Cal asked as his stomach churned uneasily at his father’s comments.
“Sure,” he replied and finished his whiskey. “So when are you gonna let me drive your car?”
Cal laughed. He and his father poured themselves another drink and continued to chat for a while until the clock’s chime interrupted them at midnight. Mr. Adams determined it was time for him to turn in for the night. He swallowed the last mouthful of liquor and then rose from the couch. As he walked past Cal, he placed a hand upon his son’s shoulder.
“Love you, bud,” he said, giving him a reassuring squeeze.
“Love you too, Dad.” Cal’s father retreated upstairs and left him alone to finish his drink in front of the dimming fireplace. As he sipped the last of his whiskey, Cal reflected on his father’s words.
Mr. Adams had seemed to believe what Claire and Andrew had was love—something that had not been there between Cal
and Andrew. Perhaps he had been oblivious to the connection between his sister and his ex since he was so caught up in showing himself off to Andrew.
I’ve never felt like this before. I don’t know what it is, but there’s just something about him.
Cal recalled Claire’s blissful expression as she gushed over Andrew earlier. His sister was in love, and he had been blind to this until now. Maybe he should let go of his infatuation with Andrew. No, he had to let go of his infatuation with Andrew. It wasn’t fair for Cal to stand in the way of Claire’s happiness. This could be true love, something that probably would have never flourished between Cal and Andrew—even if he had stayed.
Besides, it appeared as if there was potential with Jacob. Mr. Adams was right: everything has a way of working out in the end. Maybe this could be the closure Cal needed. He could move on and find his own happiness—maybe with Jacob.
Feeling somewhat at ease, Cal finished his drink and grew drowsy. He extinguished the last of the embers in the fireplace and then prepared for bed. As he climbed under the toasty covers, Cal repeated his father’s words.
Everything has a way of working out in the end.
The next morning, Cal awoke before nine and still felt rather content from his conversation with his father. After gazing out the window and discovering it was a clear, sunny morning, he decided to go for a leisurely run to further ease his mind. Cal changed into his running shorts and a tight tank top and grabbed his zip-up athletic hoodie before heading downstairs into the kitchen for a light breakfast.
“Good morning, sweetie,” his mother greeted as she fried some eggs in a sizzling pan. Claire and Andrew were seated at the kitchen table with mugs of steaming coffee.
“Morning,” Cal replied.
“You want some eggs?” Mrs. Adams asked.
“No thanks, I’m getting ready to go for a run,” he informed her as he grabbed a cup of plain Greek yogurt from the fridge.
“Oh, mind if we come with you?” Claire inquired as she set down her coffee.
“Um—”
“I didn’t bring any running clothes,” Andrew admitted, with a concerned expression.
“And he probably doesn’t have the right shoes,” Cal added.
