“What?”
“Just remember… I’m crazy about you.”
***
Nick fisted his hand on the table as he watched the woman he cared about cozying up to the man he despised. They hadn’t touched since he’d warned Megan against it, but every time Carver made her laugh, Nick’s gut twisted as though he had witnessed a physical caress.
“What the hell’s goin on between you and Carver’s chick, man?” James asked.
He’d been friends with that group of guys since high school. They all knew Shaw Carver and how much Nick hated him.
“She’s not Carver’s woman. She’s mine.”
Nick’s best friend, Warren, nudged his shoulder. “I think someone should tell her the score. From where I’m sittin’, she and Carver look pretty tight.”
Nick finished off his third Jack Daniels. Megan was still working on her first glass of wine. She’d be driving his car home. “I warned her not to let him get too close.”
James stole a glance at her. “She looks familiar. I haven’t seen you two together, so where the hell have I seen her?”
“On TV,” their friend Kevin chimed in. “She does that country music show.”
“That’s right,” James said, snapping his fingers. “Man, she’s even hotter in person.”
“Watch it,” Nick said as he gestured for another round of drinks.
“Why haven’t you told me about her?” Warren asked.
“We haven’t been seein’ each other that long.”
The waitress rested her hand on Nick’s shoulder when she delivered their drinks, and Nick couldn’t hide his smile when he spotted Megan shooting daggers through the back of the waitress’s head.
“So, is it serious, or what?” Warren asked.
“I’d like it to be.” That was an understatement. He’d never pursued a woman that way before, never been so terrified he was less than she needed.
“So why the hell is she out with Carver?” James asked, drinking his beer.
“They were seein’ each other before we hooked up.” Nick glared when Megan leaned across the table and rested her hand on Shaw’s forearm. “She said she’s here to tell him about us.”
“What’s there to tell? You bangin’ her, or what?” Kevin asked, grinning.
Those guys had known him half his life, so Nick wouldn’t normally have been offended, but his feelings for Megan were different. “Mind your own business, asshole.”
The three men looked at each other and laughed. They said in unison, “He’s bangin’ her.”
“So, watchin’ your woman with the enemy must make you crazy, huh, McCall?” James laughed.
Nick knew his friends were just trying to get a rise out of him. He would have done the same thing, but they didn’t know how close he was to losing it. Just seeing them together pushed him closer to the edge than he’d ever been before, and he didn’t know how to suppress the rage. With every fiber of his being, he wanted to pick Megan up and carry her away from Carver. He couldn’t risk alienating her when they were finally getting closer.
“I suggest we change the subject,” Nick said.
J.T. walked up and gripped his nephew’s shoulder. “I want to make sure y’all have a ride home before I head out.”
The guys all said they did before J.T. turned to Nick. “How ‘bout you? Did you drive tonight?”
“Yeah, but Meg didn’t. She’ll be drivin’ my car home.”
Nick was grateful he’d brought his convertible instead of his pickup. As much as he’d love to see Megan shifting gears in her tight little dress and high heels, he didn’t think they’d make it all the way to the ranch without him directing her to pull off on some dark, deserted road.
He wanted her so badly. He could almost smell her perfume, taste her on his lips. His hands itched with the urge to caress her skin, to feel her under him again, hear her crying out his name. His desire went beyond needing to wipe the image of Carver out of her mind. He wanted to possess her the way she possessed him.
Chapter Eleven
“Why him?” Shaw groaned. “Of all the guys you could have picked, why the hell did it have to be him?”
Megan hadn’t said it in so many words, but Shaw was a perceptive man. The way her eyes had drifted to Nick all night made guessing the reason for her distraction easy.
“I’m so sorry. I never intended to start seeing him, it just kind of happened. I want you to know, I wasn’t with him while I was dating you. I swear.”
“That’s somethin’, I guess.” Shaw scowled as he reached for his beer. “Damn it, Megan, you and I could have had somethin’ special if you’d given me half a chance.”
“I think you’re a sweet guy. I’m sorry things didn’t work out,” she said, wishing she could say or do something to make him feel better. He was a good man, despite what Nick thought. Shaw didn’t deserve to be collateral damage in the train wreck known as her love life.
“So am I. Sorrier than you know.” He reached for her hand.
Megan withdrew her hand when she saw Nick glaring at Shaw. “What is it with you two? Why do you and Nick hate each other so much?”
Shaw smirked. “I suspect it’s because we’re so much alike. We’re both competitive as hell, whether it’s football, fast cars, girls, or horses. We both want to win.”
Megan rolled her eyes. “Why do grown men think acting like little boys is okay? Y’all need to grow up.”
His mouth twitched as though he was suppressing a smile. “Careful now, you’re startin’ to sound like you were born and bred here.”
She wagged a French-manicured fingernail in the air. “You can take the girl out of Hollywood, but you can’t take Hollywood out of the girl.”
“Does that mean you miss it?”
“Not as much as I thought I would.” Megan was surprised to hear herself say that. She was even more surprised it was true. She’d come to Nashville for a little distance from the people talking trash behind her back. That, and she’d hoped to build a relationship with her father. She never expected to make friends or find a place she felt… No, she wouldn’t allow herself to go there. L.A. was her home. All of her career prospects were there, and her career was the only thing that mattered.
“Does that mean you’re thinkin’ about stickin’ around a while?”
“Only until the end of my contract.”
“Does McCall know that?”
“Yes.” She drained her wine glass, hoping he would let the subject rest.
“He can’t be too happy about it. I know he likes to call the shots.”
“I never promised him anything. He says he’s fine with a temporary arrangement.”
Shaw laughed. “I don’t see why he shouldn’t be. He’s never wanted to be tied down before.”
“Is that so?” Megan thought about the photograph she’d found in his drawer. “What about Brandi?”
Shaw clenched his jaw. “That’s my little sister. I think he just went out with her to piss me off. She’d been crushin’ on him a long time. We came to blows when I found out.”
Megan wondered if Nick fought Shaw for the hell of it or because his feelings for Brandi ran deeper than he claimed. “Does she still have feelings for him?”
“I suspect so, but she knows better than to talk to me about him.”
“So he ended their relationship?”
“She went away to school, so it just kind of died a natural death.” He grinned. “Thank God.”
“Huh. How long ago was that?”
“A few years back.”
Megan let the pause rest, hoping she could resist the urge to ask any more questions. “Is she back in town now?”
“Yeah. Why?”
“Do you know if she and Nick ever see each other?”
He smiled, though amusement never reached his eyes. “You really do have it bad for him, don’t you?”
“No, I’m just curious. Your sister would probably be the perfect girl for him.” Just saying that made
her heart hurt.
“Why the hell do you say that?”
“They must have a lot in common. You guys all grew up on a ranch, went to the same schools, have the same circle of friends. She’d fit into his world. A perfect rancher’s wife, right?”
“I don’t know. I never really thought about it.” Shaw slid a plastic menu between his fingers as though he needed the distraction. “I sure as hell wouldn’t want that guy as my brother-in-law. I can barely stand havin’ him as my neighbor.”
Megan stole a glance at Nick, and the thought of him marrying the beautiful girl in the photo hit her with the impact of a sledgehammer.
She watched him throw some bills on the table and say a few words to his friends before heading toward their table.
Nick didn’t even acknowledge Shaw when he reached their booth. “You okay, sweetheart? You look a little pale,” Nick said.
“I’m fine.” He raised an eyebrow at the hitch in her voice, and she cleared her throat.
Nick said to Shaw, “If you need a ride, the boys said they’d give you a lift. Megan is drivin’ my car home.”
“But my car’s at the station.” She didn’t appreciate his assumption she was ready to call it a night simply because he was.
“Tomorrow’s Saturday. You don’t have to work, right?”
“No.”
“Cool. We can sleep late…” He winked. “Maybe even have a little breakfast in bed. Then I’ll drive you into town to pick up your car before we head over to Alisa and Liam’s.”
Megan knew he was sending Shaw a message about the status of their relationship, but she couldn’t find the will to argue. After her conversation with Shaw, she needed Nick’s reassurance she was the woman he wanted to be with… at least for tonight.
“Alisa and Liam’s?” she asked, trying to focus on something other than that territorial gleam in his eyes.
“Yeah, they’re havin’ that birthday party for their little guy tomorrow night. I thought we’d go together.”
Alisa had sent Megan an evite, and Megan had responded that she’d love to attend, but she hadn’t even considered attending with Nick. She wasn’t sure she was ready to answer questions from his family and friends about their relationship.
“Listen, we can talk about it at home.” He reached for her hand before pulling a wad of cash out of his pocket. He threw some bills on the table. “Dinner’s on me tonight, Carver.”
Shaw reached for the money, wadded it in a ball, and threw it at Nick, hitting him in the chest. “Don’t be an asshole, McCall. We both know I don’t need your money.”
Nick laughed, obviously getting off on taunting him. “Whatever you say. I’ll see you around, Carver. Hopefully not too soon.”
Megan touched Shaw’s shoulder. “Thanks for dinner. It was nice.”
“Anytime, darlin’. When you get tired of this idiot, and I know you will, you know where to find me.”
“Let’s go,” Nick snarled, reaching for her arm. They were on the sidewalk when Nick tossed her the keys to his car, forcing her to snag them in the air before they fell to the ground.
“What’s your problem?” Megan demanded.
“We’ll talk about it later.”
“I want to talk about it now,” she said, reaching for his arm.
His eyes glittered dangerously. “No, you don’t. Trust me, you don’t.”
“If you’re mad because I went out with Shaw tonight-”
“Mad doesn’t even begin to cover it.”
Megan knew Nick had a bad temper, but she’d never been afraid he would unleash his anger and frustration on her. He was too much of a gentleman to cross any lines, which gave her the confidence to challenge him. “Maybe you should have your buddies take you home. I’ll take a cab back to the station.” She pushed his keys into his chest.
“Like hell you will.”
He hauled her up against him, kissing her with such ferocity she didn’t know whether to slap him or answer his passion.
When they finally broke apart, he was breathing heavily and his eyes were still half-closed. “Damn you. You make me crazy, girl.”
Still feeling a little light-headed from the kiss, she said, “I thought you’d gotten over your fit. You didn’t let on you were still pissed in front of Shaw.”
He grunted. “I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowin’ watching you laughin’ and havin’ a good time with him made me sick.”
“He’s a nice guy. You’d see that if you’d bury this adolescent grudge and try acting like a mature adult.”
“I don’t want to talk about him. I want to talk about you and me. And how you’re spoken for every goddamn night from now until…”
“I leave town.” Pretending they were building something real, something lasting seemed too easy for him, and she knew that could never be.
“Let’s just go.”
Megan could tell by the tense set of his broad shoulders he was still furious, but he was biding his time until they were behind closed doors. She didn’t care how hard it was for him to hear, she refused to lead him on. She wasn’t in it for the long haul.
He opened the door to his sleek black Mercedes convertible, made sure she was settled inside before closing the door, and walked around to the passenger’s side.
“This doesn’t seem like your kind of ride.” She fastened her seat belt while he did the same.
“Maybe you don’t know me as well as you think you do.”
“What the hell is your problem?”
“You think I could never fit into your world. That’s why you’re not willin’ to give us a chance, isn’t it? You think just ‘cause I drive a pickup truck and wear cowboy boots that I’d embarrass you at a black tie event.”
She shifted to look at him. He looked so hurt, so frustrated, she had to reach for his hand. “Nick, you’re the whole package. Don’t think I can’t see that.”
His hand flexed around hers. “If you want the good life, I can give you that. I know you think just because I’m a rancher, I’m strugglin’ to get by, but that’s not the case.” He looked out the window as he flexed his free hand on his knee.
“I don’t care about your money.”
“I’m just sayin’ I can give you anything… everything you want. If you want safety, security, I can give you that.”
His conviction left her speechless. No one had offered her so much without asking for anything in return. “I don’t want anything from you. I can take care of myself,” she said gently.
He squeezed his eyes shut, as though he was trying to rein in his temper. “Do you know how much it pisses me off when you say that? I want to help you. Why the hell won’t you let me?”
“I don’t know what you think you can do to help me.”
“I can help you build the kind of life you’ve always been too afraid to hope for.”
Megan stared at him, stunned. How could he know she wasn’t satisfied with her life? “You don’t know-”
“Yes, I do,” he whispered, silencing her with a finger to her lips. “I do know. I see it in your eyes when you make love to me. You want more. You want a man who’s gonna love you for more than just your pretty face and rockin’ body. You need a guy who knows when you need to be held, who’s there when you need a shoulder to cry on.” He brushed away the tear streaking her face. “You need a man who’ll take on anyone who tries to hurt you and force you to reach for your dreams because he knows you deserve the best and he won’t let you settle for less. You need me, Meg. Don’t you get that?”
She was crying in earnest, but she didn’t care. He had already stripped her bare, exposing her deepest, darkest fantasies. “I can’t allow myself to need anyone, least of all someone like you.”
He took his seatbelt off and shifted to face her. “What does that mean? Why not me?”
“You’re the kind of guy who needs to take control of everyone and everything around you. You need to protect everyone, especially the woman in your life.”
/> “Why is that so terrible?” He played with the narrow diamond band on her right hand.
“If I let you take care of me…” She pressed her shoulder into the seat, wishing she could disappear instead of voice the truth. “I might forget how to take care of myself.”
He frowned. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I might get too dependent on you. When it ends-”
“Why the hell do you assume it’s gonna end?”
“Everything ends eventually, Nick. That’s why it’s best not to let yourself get too attached.”
He looked at her a long time, as though he was trying to read her thoughts. “You’re wrong, Meg. Everything doesn’t end. My parents are just as in love now as they’ve always been. I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that’s never gonna change.”
“But one of them will die eventually, Nick. Then what will happen to the other? How do you suppose your mother or father could go on without the love of their life by their side?” When he looked dazed by her comment, she said, “That’s my point. Everyone leaves you eventually. Your spouse dies, your children grow up and leave home, your friends move away…”
He held his hand up. “So, let me get this straight. You think by livin’ in your own little world, refusin’ to let anyone get too close, you’re protectin’ yourself?”
She knew she could never make him understand, but she didn’t have to. It was her life and her decision. “You haven’t walked in my shoes. You can’t possibly understand why I feel the way I do.”
“No, but I’m tryin’. I’m really tryin’.” He caressed her cheek with his hand.
“We should go,” she said, reaching out to start the car.
His hand on her wrist stopped her. “Is this really what you want, sweetheart? You want to shield your heart behind walls of dread and desperation? You want to cut yourself off from the rest of the world, warn off the people who try to get too close because you’re afraid of lovin’ someone and losin’ them?”
When he put it that way, he made her sound pathetic. Megan knew she wouldn’t have gotten so far in life if she’d given her love indiscriminately, the way her mother had. The only person her mother had withheld her love and affection from had been her daughter. The men in her mother’s life always felt smothered by her need for more: more of their time, more of their money, more sex, more understanding and compassion. For her mother, nothing was ever enough. That was why Megan vowed she would never ask anyone for anything. She would rather fail on her own than succeed because of someone else.
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