by Jenn Nixon
King Harer Delos stood in the doorway, awaiting an invitation. Tiva knew he was there, yet she continued to stare out her window lost in her own thoughts.
“The longer you dwell and refuse to move on, the more pain you will feel, Guardian Boon.”
“And what do you know of it, sire? At what age did you slaughter another?” she said without turning.
“Much older than you,” he said. “But I do know what you are feeling; I know it well, Tiva.”
“If I may speak freely, sire, you know nothing of how I feel. I took the life of someone I knew. Not in battle or threat of my own life, I struck him down without thinking, before deciding if it was the right course of action.”
“You thwarted an enemy, Guardian Boon,” the king said sternly. “An enemy who attacked you and your mother. The intruder killed two with his bomb in the hover storage facility.”
“Two?” Tiva turned and met eyes with the king. “Who?”
“Yoka Becha and former guardian Mali Jelev, your training mate Jex’s grandmother. What you did was part of your duty, Tiva. Granted all of us wanted you to be older before facing this, but your natural reflexes to protect overrode thought and you did what you had to do.”
“But did I? Would it not have been better if Bumo lived to give us information? Could we not have used the knowledge he possessed to learn more about the faction? We know not how he came here, or how he gained access beyond the gates. We are unsure if he followed me from Hentor. He was surprised to learn I was a guardian, but what of those who ordered him, do they know?”
“You make sound arguments, Tiva, but I am not here to speak of politics.”
“Then why are you here?” she said, confusion clouding her mind. Rage and terror filled her without warning. She balled her hands into fists and shook. “Has something else happened? Where is my father?”
“Nothing is wrong; your father is on his way home from Cenii province. I came here to see you. I am concerned, Tiva.”
She felt angry and was unsure of the reason. Delos was a compassionate king. He cared for his people, and those who protected him. She knew this, yet something inside her remained cold and unfeeling. “Why?”
The king sighed and leaned against the doorframe. “Do you blame me for sending you to Hentor, Tiva?”
She furrowed her brow then shook her head. “The blame is all upon my shoulders. I am the one who murdered Bumo.”
“Tiva Boon, you will not speak such harsh words!” Harer said, body tensing. “Murder is a malicious act of someone with no morals or feelings; an action of a coward with no honor. You are a protector to the people of Abennelp: keeper of peace and guardian of the throne. Your reaction to Bumo may have been rash and vengeful, but you did not murder him. You did your duty. You will learn from this, Tiva, you will carry the pain with you and always remember, but never again will you kill another person in haste.”
She stared up at the king. A tear slid down her cheek. Harer entered her room and knelt down taking her face in his hand. With his thumb, he wiped away the tear. “I may be your king, Tiva, but I care for all my guardians. It pains me to know you hurt so. No one wished this upon you so early, and if I could, I would ensure you would never face such decisions again. You still have the choice to change your life path if you feel you are not made for guardianship.” He gently brushed her hair from her face. “There is such strength in you, Tiva. I knew it from the very first time I laid eyes upon you. Recover your mind and spirit; take as much time as you need. When you are ready, return to us, if that is your desire…for you have time before you can change your path if that is your wish.”
“I am a Royal Guardian of Abennelp, King Delos. I will never turn my back on you,” she vowed, through teary eyes.
“And I shall never turn my back on you,” he said then kissed her forehead. “Rest well, Tiva.”
The king rose and exited her room. She waited for him to descend the stairs before returning to her window. More than anything, she wanted to see her father. Both her mother and the king offered sage advice, but she believed Kevler understood how she truly felt. Her father was born a guardian, just as she was. He had killed, maybe not at such a young age, but he had taken many lives over time.
Tiva stayed in her room, alone with her thoughts. She waited. No visits from friends, no nighttime journey to see Te, no playtime with her siblings. She waited for her father’s return, and before the suns set on the day after the king’s visit, Kevler arrived home.
She spent the night curled up in his lap, talking, crying, and listening. Replaying the night in her mind was hard; she strained to gather the words. Kevler comforted her, told stories of the scars he still carried in his heart from battle. He advised her how to deal with the guilt and anger. The night passed into morning, D’laja interrupted to bring them food and drink, then left them to their healing.
Finally, after all her tears were spent, and she could think of nothing more to say, Tiva hugged her father and thanked him. She asked for one more day of rest before returning to the palace, knowing many would wish to speak with her. She had many loose ends yet untied. Kevler agreed, and left her to collect her thoughts for the remainder of the day.
When the family gathered for evening meal, things seemed more normal within the house. Everyone was together, and somewhat relaxed. Remock and Bintu spoke of their training in the palace. Kevler offered a few details of his tour in Cenii, and D’laja mentioned the mourning for Becha and Jelev. The sinking feeling returned within Tiva’s chest, but she put on a brave face and asked if she could attend. Her parents agreed then changed the subject.
The rest of the evening was quiet. Tiva ventured out, after sunset, to visit Te. She told him every detail of her mission thankful that Te could ask her no questions nor press for details; it afforded her the chance to speak her mind freely. Eventually, she fell asleep in the comfort of Te’s roots, enjoyed a dreamless sleep, and woke in the morning refreshed and ready to return to duty.
There was still much to do. The faction, now more powerful and dangerous than believed, needed to be uncovered. The king had sent her father to Cenii for a purpose, and she wanted to find out the reason. Tespor mentioned news he wished to share as well.
She still had to deal with Tespor on a personal level. Telling him she was not interested in courting would be difficult, but she had plenty of time alone to think about what to say to him. She hoped for the best.
Tiva rode into Degort with her entire family. Remock and Bintu had training. Her mother was on duty inside the palace, and her father was meeting with the king for council. When the family parted, Tiva went into the palace searching for Zenid. This would be her first day on patrol as a level two guardian, it seemed as if it were yesterday she passed the test, however it had been almost two weeks; first her mission to Hentor, then her time away to heal.
She walked through the courtyard, averting her eyes from the incinerated hover storage facility. She overheard her mother talking with the king when he visited about a timed bomb in one of the hovers inside the deck. It didn’t sound sophisticated, not heavy on damage, but the amount of fuel in the facility caused the destruction to be far greater than the device meant to do.
Once inside the palace, she breathed in, trying to stay composed. The memories were still vivid in her mind.
Slowly she walked the corridor, through the Great Hall to the lift, and rode up to Zenid’s training room. She was busy with five trainees, one was Jenon with a new hairstyle, two other, the children of Lety Ispek’s eldest son, and the last were her cousins Hanall and Riyn.
“Welcome, Guardian Boon.” Zenid waved her inside.
“Spirited greetings.” Tiva saluted and acknowledged the children. “I am here for my assignment. I have returned and recovered from my mission.”
“Ah, yes.” Zenid smiled and picked up a data recorder. She scrolled through it for a moment then nodded. “Here we are…I have assigned you the ground through fifth floors of the palace. Your partner
will be my son, Yark, he usually starts the day on floor five; you can find him there.”
“I may have to meet with the king today, shall I inform you if it comes to pass?”
“No need, just ensure Yark knows your whereabouts.”
“I understand.”
“Well wishes, Tiva. I will see you at the end of the day.”
Tiva bowed before exiting the room. She didn’t know her patrol partner, Yark Finto, well. He was older than Rae and Rux, but Tespor knew him for they were adopted brothers. It would be nice to become familiar with someone new.
She found Yark on the fifth floor as his mother had said. She saluted him when she neared; he smiled and returned the gesture.
“I am Tiva Boon, assigned as your patrol partner.”
“Greetings, Tiva. Yark Finto. How do you fare this fine morning?”
“Well, and yourself?”
“As good as can be asked of me,” he said warily, and led the way as they began their patrol through the corridors of the fifth floor. “Have you heard the most recent news of the faction?”
“No, I have not,” she said, now curious.
“The king dispatched several groups of guardians to infiltrate a known hideout after this latest incident. He is none too pleased about losing more guardians.”
“I can understand that. What news from the missions?”
“None yet, this happened only a couple days past.”
“How did you gather information so quickly?”
“My father keeps me abreast. I am preparing to take my level one test, and he wishes me to know all that is happening.”
“Should you be sharing this with me? I am only a level two, and from the looks of things as they are, even though I wish it, I may never reach my goal of level one.”
Yark grinned. “So you are the one who wants to be an elite Royal Guardian?” A chuckle escaped his lips. He motioned to the tower lift and they stepped in. “My mother speaks of you often, but has never told me your name. I assumed it was Rae Boon or Rhula Ispek, or perhaps Loloa Becha. Well, after all I have heard, I’m not surprised it is a Boon, or you for that matter.”
“What do you mean?”
“Word travels quickly among the halls of the palace. I’ve heard stories. Ones that may still be a sore subject for you, that which happened in the garden...”
The lift stopped and the doors opened. Yark waited for Tiva to exit first, and when she did, she bumped into Tespor and Jex.
“Tiva!” They said, surprise in their eyes.
“Spirited greetings,” she said. Her friends acknowledged Yark, and Tespor quickly pulled her to the side. “I am on duty,” she protested.
“I must speak with you soon. Meet me for midday meal in the dining hall.”
“I will try my best,” she murmured and drew her arm from Tespor’s grasp. “This is my first day on duty. I wish not to cause trouble.”
“Everyone must eat, Tiva.” Tespor rolled his eyes. “Meet me if you can. There is much to say.” When Tespor and Jex left, Tiva followed Yark down the corridor of the fourth floor.
“He seems anxious to speak with you.”
“Quite,” she said. “He has something of importance to tell me.”
“Tespor probably overheard my father talking with me. He is quite skillful at picking up information not intended for his ears.”
Tiva smiled. Tespor seemed to be copying her habits. However, she had a feeling that he wanted to speak about courting, again.
Together, she and Yark patrolled the remaining floors of the palace, keeping to general topics of weather and training. Once they reached the ground floor, she saw guardians rushing about heading to the king’s private chambers. Yark seemed as curious as she did, but neither said anything and continued with rounds. Tiva’s thoughts wandered back to the garden, and Yark’s curiosity about the event. He was almost an elite Royal Guardian. He had been on missions and had the respect of others. Could she gain insight from him?
“You asked me about what happened,” she spoke suddenly.
“I did…” he said, slowing his pace. “I will be forthright with you, Tiva, if you permit me.”
She nodded.
“Many are concerned, my mother included, she asked me to try and help if I could.”
“Help in what manner, Yark?”
“I took the life of an enemy some time ago. My father and I were on tour in Obadan province and a man had taken a family hostage. He needed medical attention for he was not of sound mind, but he was ready to harm his captives. My father and I could not let that happen.” He paused as if to collect his thoughts. “We infiltrated the home, and this man gave us no choice but to attack and kill him. I battled inside my mind for many moons, trying to understand the weight of it all. It is not an easy thing to take the life of another, as you well know, but time has passed and I can recall the incident with a clear mind and conscience now. We did everything possible not to harm him, but in the end there was no other action to take.”
“How did you deal with the guilt of your actions?”
“It was not easy. Mostly, I spoke of my feelings with my parents and trainers. Many of us in the service of the king have had to do things we are not proud of, but alas, they must be done. Keeping emotions locked inside will only delay your healing,” Yark said solemnly. “Having said that, if you ever wish to speak your feelings to me, I will listen, for I understand how you feel.”
“Thank you, Yark. I appreciate your kindness and candor.”
“It is all we can do for each other in this charge, Tiva. We must support and help one another when we can, otherwise we will fail as a team.”
“Quite true,” Tiva said. She would not tell him her feelings now, but perhaps in time as they became closer she could open up to her new friend.
Yark and Tiva secured the first five floors of the palace several times before midday. They talked of history and dreams of the future. Tiva didn’t expect anything to happen, as the grounds around the palace were on high alert with a dozen more guardians than usual. She was grateful for the quietness of her duty, and hoped it would remain so for as long as possible.
Returning to the fifth floor, Yark left Tiva to patrol alone while he went to the dining hall to eat. As she secured the fifth floor again, she saw Neola exiting the lift.
“Tiva!”
“Spirited greetings, Neola.”
Neola ran toward her and wrapped her arms around Tiva. She returned the embrace.
“How do you fare, my friend?”
“I am well.”
“You cannot fool me so easily, Tiva, but I will not press you for details. I know you’ve had some trouble. It is good to have you back. Come to see me at any time if you feel the need to talk. I am here for you, my friend.” Neola squeezed her tight then released her and smiled. “I may not understand what you have been through, but the words of the Yantar can help calm your spirit.”
“I thank you, Neola. I may take your offer to heart, for my spirit could use calming.”
“I must go, but please visit me in the palace ministry house when you feel ready.”
“I will.”
Yark returned and forced Tiva to take time for herself. She proceeded to the dining hall, ordered a small platter of food and a juice. She sensed many eyes on her as she sat in the corner away from the other guardians. Tiva wondered what they were thinking. Did they now see her in a different light? Was her reputation to be the guardian who slaughtered a boy in rage? The Truda twins were present, laughing and eating with a few other guardians she did not know well. She caught Litru’s eye, he smiled at her as he often did, not acting differently in the least, so she returned the gesture with a slight nod.
Glancing around the rest of the hall, she searched for Tespor and Jex. Seeing neither, Tiva quietly ate her meal, keeping to herself. The hall slowly emptied. She finished her juice and carried her tray to the trash receptacle. Before she turned to leave, she felt the presence of her mother.
“How are you faring, precious one?” D’laja said, walking toward her.
“Very well, Mother.” Tiva forced a smile. “My patrol partner, Yark, and I have made quick friends.”
“I am pleased to hear that.” D’laja touched her daughter’s cheek gently. “I must eat and return, but I shall see you this evening.”
“Yes, Mother.”
Tiva returned to the lift. She called Yark on her PCD to find his location, and after he replied, Tespor appeared in the corridor. He waved at her as he approached.
“I missed you on break,” he said with a smile. “May I walk with you back to your post?”
“Yes, Tespor, we have much to talk about, do we not?”
“I wished to invite you to my celebration, my eighteenth cycle is near, and I’m having a gathering with the Finto’s. I’m also informing the king I wish to begin preparations for level one.”
“That is most joyous news, Tespor. You will make a fine elite guardian.”
“I know the journey is long, but I should finish all that is needed by my next cycle.”
“I have no doubts you will, and I would be honored to attend your gathering.”
“There is some other information to share, though you are on patrol with Yark, he is loose with his tongue so he may have told you that which I know.” He chuckled and held the door to the lift for her. “Where are you heading?”
“Fourth floor,” she said, stepping in. “Yark has told me of the king’s orders. Beyond that he did not say much.”
“Many of the guardians have returned, and the king is in council with them now. I passed the Great Hall, tensions are high.”
“That can only mean the news is bad.”
“That is my guess as well.” He shrugged. “There is not much else to say, but tell me, Tiva, how do you fare?”
“I am dealing as best I can, Tespor, but I wish to speak to you about personal matters.”
He took her hand and looked deep into her eyes. “This time for you must be confusing, I know not what you have been through. In time, I hope you will confide in me, but for now, matters of the heart should be the least of your concerns.”
