I notice Judy’s blush.
“Leave Judy out of this,” J.D. says, “She’s not the one that shirked duties, ran off on a surprise vacation with an artist on our platform, got caught using drugs, and came home with a tail between her legs.”
J.D.’s outburst stuns me.
“It’s okay, J.D,” Judy says softly, flashing a smile. “I’m not offended. I understand what he meant.” She glances at me. “I agree it’s a non-issue. We don’t work directly with her or anything, she’s just one of many artists on our platform.”
Something’s going on between J.D and Judy. I’m sure of it.
“Thank you,” I say, nodding at her.
But J.D.’s shaking his head. “What if someone says the reason her popularity skyrocketed is because of this little romance? The public doesn’t give a damn about the truth and media is in it for reads.”
Around the table, the partners shift uncomfortably.
“Oh come on, J.D,” Judy says, planting her hands on her hips. “Are you trying to say the media can somehow make SXz responsible for her blowing up on all platforms? She’s not a hit on our site alone. The song is blowing up everywhere, and anyone who thinks we’ve got anything to do with that is just going to look ignorant and like they’re stretching.”
J.D. shuts up and I watch them both very carefully.
“She’s right,” I say and J.D’s head whips my way. His scowl is white hot.
“She is,” Aaron says.
“So, what is the plan moving forward?” Damian asks me.
I consider my words carefully. “No coke. It’s not going to be a problem.” I’m not about to swear no pot. It’s not fucking heroin. I didn’t go overboard. I’m not craving it.
Damian nods. “Good,” he says.
“We aren’t a bunch of teenagers, anymore,” Aaron says. “We’ve got a lot of people on the payroll, Hayden. We have a responsibility to them, to the company you thought up, that we’ve built.”
The words cut through me. Aaron is the chief operating officer and knows the day to day of SXz better than anyone. He has an incredible ability to track the best tech talent. I know what he’s saying. If we start losing talent, the jig is up.
“I’m sorry,” I finally say.
“It’s not about the fucking tabs,” Damian says. “It’s about you, dude. We need to know you’re good, bro. You’re clean. You need rehab? Take as much time as you need.”
“No,” I say. “It’s not like that. You guys have my word.”
There is silence.
“What about Sabine?” Judy asks me, her eyes shining with excitement.
“What about her?” I ask.
She brings both fists up under her chin and presses her arms tightly to her chest. “You’re going to keep seeing each other, right?”
“Oh, hell,” J.D. mumbles. “I’m leaving. Some of us have work to do.” He walks past me, hesitates, then claps a hand on my shoulder. “Good luck,” he says sincerely.
“Thanks,” I say, making a mental note to confront him later. I have a feeling we’ve got a lot to talk about.
“Same here,” Damian says as he and Aaron stand up. “I’m glad you’re okay, man,” he says to me as they head out. I nod.
Left alone in the room with Judy, I notice she’s staring out the glass doors. Following her stare, I see J.D. laughing with another employee.
“So, I guess romance is everywhere,” I say nonchalantly.
“Yeah,” she sighs. Suddenly, her back snaps straight, and she spins to face me. “I mean… what?”
Busted. “So, you were telling me about the new guy,” I say, moving toward the door. She falls into step beside me.
“Oh, yeah, nothing happened. He’s married or something,” she says, absentmindedly worrying over her pinkie nail.
I bet.
Chapter 16
Sabine
We have to talk.
My text to Bassirou is just hanging there in limbo, and I’m more aware of every second ticking by than I think I’ve ever been.
My phone lights up with a message. An address.
I give the taxi driver the info and sit back, staring out the window in misery. I knew I’d have to come home and face the music, but I didn’t expect this.
I didn’t think the whole world was going to be calling me a druggie. It’s just some fucking pot. I’m not on meth or anything, for fuck’s sake.
I’ve done heavier stuff in the past, but not on that trip with Hayden.
The taxi stops in front of the hotel, and I head out, my stomach knotting up so hard I feel like I’m going to throw up. In the elevator, I lower my head, studying my bag. This is harder than I thought it would be. I’m shaking, feeling ill because I know this is going to get ugly. There’s just nothing else that can be done.
Standing in front of his door, I have second thoughts. I could walk away now. Just leave and not come back. Runaway, hire a lawyer, have that lawyer fire Bassirou for me and never talk to him again. Hell, I never considered what rights I might have, but I know someone who might just be willing to help me with all of that.
The thought of Hayden brings me a sudden strength. He’s going to help me in any way he can. He already told me as much. I’ve got nothing to fear with Bassirou. But I’m a strong ass woman, and I’m going to confront him.
On all of it. The missing money, the lies, the bullshit, his threats, all of it.
I knock on the door.
Bassirou opens it a moment later. My already knotted stomach twists harder, and I swallow back bile as his body odor booze and cigarettes me in a one-two punch that leaves me reeling.
“You need a shower,” I gasp, feeling my eyes water.
He walks away, leaving the door open like he knows I’ll follow.
Once inside, I close the door. The click sounds so final it’s unnerving.
He ignores my statement and walks back over to the coffee table. Sorting a little hill of white powder into a line, he quickly inhales it before addressing me again.
“So, I see you’re back with your tail between your legs,” he says, brushing his nose with his thumb like he’s wiping away invisible traces of the drugs he’s snorting.
I laugh. “No, I’m not. I’m back to ask about that threat you made before I left.”
His evil grin sends my heart pounding. “You saw the papers, huh? How the mighty have fallen.”
That dread worming through me tightens like a fist. “It was you,” I say.
He nods, almost gleeful. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it? I can make it all go away, Sabine. Be with me and this will all…” he closes his hand in a fist before blowing on it and opening it wide, “go away.” His eyes struggle to focus on me.
“You’re fucked,” I say, struggling to find the phrase.
“You’re fucked.” His expression twists to pure evil.
I shake my head. “I mean you’re high. And drunk. This isn’t you, Bassirou.”
He laughs. Throws his head back and really laughs. The roaring sounds are scary, and I back up a step, ready to run out the door if need be.
“This is me. Moi,” he says, advancing on me. “I’ve always loved you, always wanted you. Just like you’ve always loved me, even if you’re too scared to admit it. We’re one and the same, Sabine.” He shoves his face near mine. “I’ll have you, one way or another.”
Stunned, I stare up at him, frozen. “That sounds… are you threatening me?” I ask, unable to believe it’s come to this.
His glee dies down a bit like he’s actually thinking about it. I pray he comes to his senses. I pray that he stops all this madness and becomes that brotherly man I cared so much for.
An evil grin spreads slowly across his lips.
“Oui, belle.” He plants a hand on the wall over my shoulder, leaning in so close I press as flat to the wall as I can. “See, I figured out how to get you away from that douchebag, Hayworth.”
“Hayden,” I correct, then wish I could jerk the word back. O
f course, he’s baiting me.
“See,” he says, lowering his voice to a snarl that makes my heart thunder, “here’s what’s going to happen.”
My whole body is so tense it aches. I can’t breathe; my lungs are paralyzed, and my chest is in agony.
“You’re going to break it off with Hayden.” He leans so close his lips are nearly touching my cheek. “You’re not going to call him or text him again, or…” he trails off, pressing a little kiss to my cheek. I squeeze my eyes closed, struggling not to rip away from him. His stench overpowers my nose, and I feel bile backing up my throat.
“Or…” He’s toying with me. Torturing me on purpose. But what could he possibly do to me that’s worse than what he’s done? At this point, I’ll forfeit all the money, all the fame, all of everything just to be rid of him.
I should never have come here. I should never have freaking come to his room without Hayden or some form of protection.
“And,” he says suddenly, and I realize the terms are changing like he’s still thinking on the best course to trap me. “And you’re going to return to France for good with me.” He trails off again, his tongue tickling up my face as he licks me.
The urge to shove him away and wipe his saliva off my face is nearly overwhelming, but I’m still frozen in that paralyzing fear and disgust.
“Mmm, delicious, Sabine.” He licks me again, and I feel hot tears slip down my cheeks. I want to hit him, knee him in the daddy bags and run for my life. I want to be free of him and all the disgusting things he’s doing now.
“You’re going to dump Hayden. You’re going to come to France with me.” His voice is velvety and rich as if he knows he’s won already. “Or something really, really, really bad is going to happen to your mother.”
My heart sinks to my shoes.
My mother. My poor, crippled, emotionally unstable mother. He’s threatening the one person I love; the one person I wish I could help. The one person who I haven’t been able to help because the fucking money is not rolling yet. Or so he says.
And suddenly, it all flashes before my eyes. My life of fame and fortune is over. My singing career is through. I’m going to give it all up to go home and keep my mother safe from this monster.
Bassirou pulls back, his eyes shining with victory. “You’re mine, sweet Sabine. Mine.”
His face is lit with an almost fanatical expression and his cheeks are red like he’s burning up with fever. I stare at him, hating him.
But mostly hating myself.
I’m moving back to the Goutte d’Or.
I should have believed the people who told me no one ever escapes that place.
Chapter 17
Hayden
I’m at my desk when Judy pops her head in. Her teal outfit is so bright it very nearly gives me an instant headache. I blink at her and notice her somber expression.
“Um, the guys need to talk to you,” she says in a stage whisper and I realize they must be right behind her.
I nod. “Send them in,” I say, putting my computer screen to sleep. Not because there’s anything to hide; it’s a respect thing we all do. During any kind of meeting, screens are placed face down or turned off.
Aaron, Damian, and J.D. all file in. Aaron and Damian drop onto the couch, and J.D. stands, arms crossed, expression unreadable. Nerves clamp tight like a hand around my gut. I stand out of my chair and walk around, sitting on the edge of my desk like removing barriers will make this easier.
I have no idea why they’re here, but I have an idea.
“There’s no easy way to say this,” J.D. says while the other two watch me. Damian’s slowly nodding his head while Aaron watches me closely like he’s trying to guess my next move.
I focus on my brother.
“You have to stop seeing Sabine.” J.D.’s neck bobs as he swallows hard. His jaw ripples like he’s clenching his teeth, expecting me to hit him or something.
I’m not going to hit him.
I have no fucking idea what to say. So, I say nothing. Adjusting my cufflink, I stay locked on my brother’s face. His eyes narrow a little bit as he continues.
“The tabloids are going crazy. There’s talk of secret marriages, payoffs, pregnancy, and sleeping with the enemy.” He shakes his head. “We know it’s all bullshit. But they also pulled your past.” He hands me a paper.
On the front is an old image of me back in the day. I look insane in the image. I don’t remember the image, but I remember the lead up to it. I’d been awake for three days. In the picture, my pupils had overtaken my eyes, my hair was sticking up every which way, and the wild look makes me want to cringe. I’d lost it back then. I’d found my way again with the help of my brother.
I shove the tabloid back at him.
What the fuck am I going to do now? I don’t want to give up Sabine. Is she worth losing everything?
“It’s not forever,” J.D. says like he’s reading my mind. “It’s temporary. Let the heat die down, then back to this fling.”
“Sequoia Capital just called. They want a meeting about all this. They want to make sure management of SXz is stable. They’re out biggest investors, Hayden.”
I know this but I’m not listening. Fling.
“This shit is starting to spook the money,” Damian says.
I’m still not listening. Sabine has never been a fling. Sure, attraction drew me to her first. But it hasn’t just been about lust for a long time. The more I know about the woman, the more I want to share her company. It’s crazy. I’m not going to put labels on it. But thinking about this now makes me realize that maybe hitting the brakes is a good idea. I need to examine what I feel and put a lid on it. Because I can only get hurt.
“I don’t know where you see this going,” J.D. says, and I assume he’s talking about the relationship.
It’s a damn good question. Where do I see it going? I don’t fall in love. I’ve never been attached to someone. I don’t let people in. I don’t let people close. Sabine has somehow managed to wiggle in closer than anyone ever has, yet, while she’s told me the ugly things in her life, I never opened up to her.
She doesn’t know what my home life was like. What my upbringing was. Who I am and what made me, me. In all honesty, she knows nothing about me. She knows the things everyone knows. I’m a partner in SXz. I’ve got money. That’s all.
“You’re making me nervous,” Aaron says.
I lift my head and look at him. “Not a problem,” I say. I’ll sort things out later. This is my business, my vision that created this whole fucking thing. I’m going to protect it even while I plan what to do next. Because I’m not giving Sabine up.
“Are you pissed?” Damian asks.
I shake my head.
J.D. studies me closely. “Don’t get mad…” He says.
“…Get even.” I finish the adage.
He nods, offering his hand in the age-old offer of truce by a handshake. It’s a deal. I shake on it, and the guys all shuffle out stiff-shouldered, and tight muscled. I wonder what they expected.
When they’re gone, Judy edges in. Her eyes are wide and tears sparkle in them. Both hands are pressed to her mouth, and I open my arms to her. She steps into them, resting her head on my chest.
“I’m so sorry,” she whispers. “I know you love her.”
Love her? No. That’s too far. Too much. It’s not love. Respect? Yes. Attraction? Absolutely? Love? No way.
I pet Judy’s hair for a second and release her. “I’m not mad,” I say softly.
She blinks up at me. “Why not?” she asks, her voice demanding. “It’s a terrible situation. Be mad. Be pissed. Don’t just let her slip away.”
I smile. “I’m not letting her slip away.”
“I’m sorry this is happening to you,” she says, staring at the floor. “You’re a nice guy, a good boss, and a good friend.”
“Thank you, that means a lot,” I tell her.
“I know it’s hard to see,” she says, “But they’re not
just worried about the company.”
I’m not sure what she’s trying to say. She must see my hesitation because she continues. “They want you to be happy. Especially J.D. They worry about you.”
I nod. I believe that wholeheartedly. The bad press isn’t helpful, especially when all I’ve ever wanted was to be left alone. There’s a reason Damian is the face of SXz. He’s better looking, but I prefer the shadows. The company doesn’t need the drama. It doesn’t need me behind the scenes making things look bad. Sure, Damian is the face of the company. But J.D. and I are the idea machines, the think tank inside the company that allows us to innovate, stay two steps ahead of the competition. Everyone is Silicon Valley knows that, and we don’t need this kind of attention.
“Thank you,” I say.
She gives me a thumb’s up and slips out the door, closing it quietly behind her.
This is temporary. So why doesn’t that make me feel better?
I sit down, turn my monitor back on. Stare at the screen. It all makes sense.
I get back to work, but in the very recesses of my mind, I plot and plan. I’m not giving Sabine up. Not for good. But how do I keep things on the down low without pushing her away? I don’t want to hurt her or make her think she drove me away. Or worse; I don’t want her to think I got what I wanted and I’m through with her now.
Fuck.
Chapter 18
Sabine
Packing everything up feels like a death sentence. Maybe that’s being overdramatic, but that’s what it feels like. I’m heading away from this life that I’ve come to love, apart from this man I’ve got feelings for to save my mother and appease this man that, I’m pretty sure, has lost his mind.
Bassirou passes behind me, his hands trailing lightly over my lower back. I spin to face him, my anger lashing out.
“I’m not your whore, Bassirou. Don’t touch me.”
He leans in close as I press back against the bed, trying to keep space between us. “Actually,” he says in a low voice that makes my stomach turn. His eyes flick to my lips, then come back up to meet mine.
Hardwired: A Billionaire and Virgin Romance (Tech Titans Book 2) Page 7
