by Leanne Banks
Her emotion choking her, she swallowed twice before she could speak. "You are a beast," she whispered. The books left diamond stud earrings in the dust.
* * *
The Billings home was an historic landmark, grand, but not as grand as Crofthaven. It was beautifully decorated, although a bit too Victorian for her taste. Nicola noticed that heads turned within a minute of Abe entering the front foyer. After a year of being in close contact with Abe, she should be accustomed to the electricity he generated just by walking into a room, but she wasn't.
"Abe, I'm so glad you could come," Robert Billings said, extending his hand.
"Wouldn't miss it," Abe said. "You remember Nicola, don't you?"
"How could I forget? The best mover and shaker in the South," Robert said with a smile. "Will you be going to D.C. with the new senator from Georgia?"
"N—"
"We're negotiating," Abe interjected. "Where's Gloria? She's done a great job with the house."
Robert winced. "I've already broken two of her angels. I'll be glad when Christmas is over."
"Abe Danforth, you're just the man I'm looking for," a woman called from across the foyer.
Nicola identified the woman as Gloria, Robert's wife. She had looped her arm through another woman's elbow, Vivian Smith's.
"Abe, I know you've been terribly busy with the campaign with no time for a social life, but now you can catch your breath and have some fun. You've met Vivian, haven't you?"
"Yes, I have," Abe said, extending his hand. "Vivian, I appreciate all your support. You've been very generous."
Abe gave a formal response, Nicola noticed. Vivian looked hopeful.
"Vivian, have you met Nicola Granville?" Abe asked.
"Oh, you were his campaign manager, weren't you?" Gloria interjected. "This girl is quick as a whip. Listen, we won't make you hang around us old folks tonight. I invited the new surgeon in town and I'm sure he'd love to meet you. Come along," she said.
Nicola shot Abe an I-told-you-so glance. "Very nice to meet you, Vivian. That color looks fabulous on you. I'll see you later," she said to Abe.
"Soon," he said.
* * *
Keeping track of Nicola with his peripheral vision, he was aware of every move she made. Although he'd made as much small talk as he'd wanted within two minutes, Vivian seemed determined to prolong the conversation. Nicola had no shortage of men wanting to talk to her, he noticed sourly. She lit up the room with her smile and laughter.
"She's so young and full of energy," Vivian said, looking at Nicola.
"Not that young," Abe said and caught Vivian's double take. "I mean she's not twenty-something. She's mature for her age."
"Will she be joining your staff in Washington?"
The woman's fishing irritated Abe, especially since he couldn't say, yes, she is. "I haven't made final arrangements for my staff."
"Do you think you'll mind the change in weather?"
Abe frowned. "What do you mean?"
"Well, it gets cold in the winter. How will you stay warm?"
Abe blinked at the coy expression on her face. Oh, no, she was offering to help him stay warm. Time's up, he told himself. He cleared his throat. "I have an excellent wool coat," he said. "Vivian, it's good seeing you again. Again, I appreciate your support. Excuse me while I get some water."
He grabbed a glass of water on his way to Nicola, who was talking with a young man. "Hello," he said with a nod to the man.
"Senator Danforth, this is Dr. Jenson. He's the new surgeon Gloria was telling us about."
Abe extended his hand. "Welcome to Savannah," he said.
"Congratulations on the election, Senator. Nicola was just telling me she won't be going to Washington, so I thought I'd check with the hospital administration about using her services."
Abe ground his teeth. "I haven't given up on bringing Nicola to Washington with me," he said. "I'll use every means at my disposal to persuade her. Excuse us for a moment," he continued, barely taking a breath as he slid his hand around Nicola's waist. "Thanks."
He led her into the hallway.
She shrugged out of his embrace and looked at him as if he'd lost his mind. "Abe, you're acting like a territorial caveman," she whispered.
"Between Gloria branding me as 'one of the old folks' and Vivian offering to keep me warm in Washington, I'm feeling a little primitive," he said.
Nicola's eyes widened. "Vivian offered to keep you warm in Washington?"
He nodded, slightly mollified by the outrage in her voice. "She went on and on about how young you were."
"I'm not that young," she retorted.
"That's what I told her."
She blinked then chuckled. "You can't blame her for going after you. You're handsome, intelligent, wealthy, sexy. Plus you've got that senior citizen's discount."
Abe scowled and something inside him ripped. "I've got two words for you, little girl." He glanced up at the mistletoe above their heads. "Merry Christmas," he said and took her in an open-mouth kiss.
* * *
Horrified by Abe's public display of passion, Nicola fled to the powder room. She splashed water on her face to cool her cheeks. She swore under her breath. Her entire body was hot and she couldn't say it was entirely due to anger or indignation or embarrassment. Oh, no, that man could kiss like nobody's business.
Trying to pull herself together, she struggled with her distress. Why was he making this so difficult? Was he one of those men who was attracted by the unattainable? Then as soon as he attained it, he lost interest?
Taking several deep breaths, she stepped into the hallway smack-dab into Gloria Billings. "Oh, excuse me. I'm so sorry."
"No problem," Gloria said.
Nicola felt the woman studying her face and tried to draw the attention away from herself. "It's a lovely party. You're a terrific hostess."
"Thank you. It comes from experience," she said with a smile. She paused. "Aren't you a little young for him?"
Nicola froze. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"A little young for the senator," Gloria said in a lowered, but knowing voice. "I saw you under the mistletoe."
Her heart slammed against her rib cage. "That was really nothing."
"It didn't look like nothing to me," Gloria said with a laugh. "Listen, you're young. Abe isn't. He may seem like great sugar-daddy material, but he needs a mature woman to handle him."
Nicola dropped her jaw. Anger and amazement rushed through her. "Number one, anyone who calls Abe a sugar daddy is greatly underestimating him. Number two, I'm no immature sugar-daddy hunter. Number three, none of this matters, because Abe and I aren't planning a future together." Still infuriated, but fearing her mouth would get her in trouble, she shrugged. "Thank you for a lovely party."
Twenty minutes later, Abe and Nicola left. He turned to her in the car. "You're being ridiculous, Nicola. When are you going to talk?"
Nicola looked at him in exasperation. "I'm being ridiculous! I'm not the one who initiated a French kiss at the home of the biggest busybody in Savannah."
He waved his hand as if she was concerned for nothing. "What's she going to do? Put on a billboard that Abe Danforth kissed Nicola Granville? So what? I'm not married. Neither are you."
"There's more than you to consider," she said, thinking of the baby. The more attention Abe drew to their relationship, the more attention there would be drawn to their child.
"What do you mean by that?"
Nicola bit her lip. "I mean, this doesn't make me look good. The man often comes out on top in these situations when people start gossiping. If this gets out, the next person who hires me will wonder if I sleep with all my clients."
Abe looked appalled. For all of one moment. "I can solve that. You can work for me."
Nicola sighed. "I don't want to work for you. I feel like a broken record."
"Then play a new song," he suggested, pulling into her driveway. "I guess this means you won't be inviting me
in," he said.
"That's correct," she said crisply and opened her car door.
He caught her arm in a firm, but gentle grasp. "Nicola?"
She took a deep breath and glanced around. "What?"
"I've never felt this way about a woman before."
Her heart stopped. "I have to go," she said. "I'll talk to you later." She scrambled out of the car and up the steps to her front door as if the hounds of hell were after her. She wondered how quickly he'd get over his feelings for her once she told him about the baby.
* * *
"Did you read the gossip column this morning?" Nicola asked Abe as he presented her with a year's supply of Skittles and walked through her front door.
Judging by the anxiety on her face, Abe figured she was going to consume all five bags this week since they were Nic's form of "nervous food." "I hate to show my age in this area, but I don't read the gossip column very often," Abe said. "I'm more likely to read the Financial Times."
Nicola dogged his steps to her den. "Their gossip columnist writes blind items. She describes the people so that readers know who is being discussed. This morning, it said, "Hot from holiday-party central, a certain newly elected representative was caught kissing his much younger campaign director under the mistletoe."
Nicola dumped all the two-pound bags of Skittles on the table except one and ripped it open. "I warned you this would happen."
Abe shrugged. "If they didn't name names, then what's the harm? Elections were held in November. Technically, everyone is newly elected."
"But you know it won't stop there," she said. "It's bound to show up in some other newspaper or magazine or on a radio show."
He watched her put three of the candies into her mouth. "So the worst thing that could happen is you'd have to make an honest man of me and marry me," he said, but knew he was only half joking.
"Oh, don't be ridiculous."
Ouch.
She chewed and swallowed. "I already told you I don't want to have the reputation that I get involved with my clients."
The situation seemed simple to Abe. "The truth is you don't get involved with your clients, but you have gotten involved with one. One who is single just like you."
She bit her lip, looking terrified.
He shook his head and tugged at her mouth. "Stop abusing your lip. I don't understand why you're so upset about this unless you're ashamed of your relationship with me."
Her jaw worked and she moved her head in a circle. She stepped back. "I'm not ashamed of our relationship. It's just not a real relationship."
"What the hell do you mean by that?"
She paced around the den. "I mean, look at the way it all started. Late one night, we got carried away. Then we told each other we should stop. And we did, sorta," she said with a wince. "We didn't start out choosing to get involved romantically. We just fell into it. I don't think that's the way a real, solid relationship starts."
Something in her tone made his gut twist. Abe absently rubbed at his stomach. "A relationship is like a journey. Just because it starts on one road doesn't mean it stays on that road."
"Yes, but don't you think we got involved because of the passion of the campaign? The passion and intensity of everything that was going on?" she asked, popping three more Skittles.
"That may have contributed, but that's not the only reason. It's not the major reason." His gut tightened another notch. "The major reason for me is that I've never felt a connection with a woman like I have with you. You don't agree with me just because my last name is Danforth. I feel like I'm on equal footing with you."
He saw a half-dozen emotions cross her face so quickly he couldn't identify them all, but he did see raw want and need and despair. He didn't understand the despair.
"I trust you, Nic. After all we've been through, I think you can handle me." Unaccustomed to exposing himself this way, he paused and chuckled. "That probably sounds arrogant as hell."
Her lips twitched. "No. It's actually a compliment." Her smile fell. "But you don't know everything about me and I'm just not sure—" Her voice broke off and she bit her lip again.
Realization dawned and he felt as if she'd stabbed him. "You're not sure of me," he said. "You don't trust me."
"Of course I trust you," she countered. "I wouldn't have been effective as your campaign manager if I didn't trust you and I wouldn't have gone to bed with you if I hadn't trusted you on some level."
"But you're not sure you can trust me in a real relationship," he said. "I was good for a secret affair, and a hot roll in the sack, but not for anything you call real." He shook his head. This was his worst fear realized, that he was incapable of having an intimate relationship with another human being. Nic had told him just as much and he was left with the worst emptiness he'd ever experienced in his life.
* * *
Ten
« ^ »
Nicola didn't hear from Abe for three days. Every hour that passed, she felt the distance between them grow exponentially. She hated hurting Abe and she knew she'd hurt him, but she also knew he didn't want any more children.
Nicola couldn't bear the thought of bringing up her child in a home where the father gave grudging attention and affection. She still hid scars of her father's abandonment. Add to that, the thought of watching Abe's feelings for her die a slow death because he didn't want the child. Nicola couldn't stand it. Better to nip things between them now before they went any further.
She told herself to be strong, but every other moment she doubted herself. What if Abe could accept their baby? What if he felt the same joy she did about having a child?
What if she won the lottery?
Nicola focused on the baby, devouring books on baby and child care, pregnancy and labor and delivery. She played Mozart music every night despite the fact that it was entirely too early to have any effect on the baby. When she visited department stores, she lingered in the infant department, wondering if her baby would be a girl or boy. It was way, way too early, but she bought a beautiful leather baby album for recording everything from the baby's first burp to the baby's first steps.
She might be facing parenthood alone, but she was going to do her best, her absolute best for this child. It was tough, but she also began to discreetly investigate job possibilities in California. She hated the idea of leaving Savannah. So much had happened to her here during the last year.
The fourth night after she'd last seen Abe, and yes, she was counting, the phone woke her. She groped for the phone, glancing at the clock. One o'clock in the morning.
"Hello, Nicola? This is Lea."
Nicola sat up in bed, her heart racing. Lea was the illegitimate daughter Abe had fathered during a special mission in Vietnam. Abe hadn't even known of her existence until this year, and it had been quite an ordeal, but a relationship between them had begun to grow.
"I'm here," Nicola said. "What is it, Lea?"
"I'm at the hospital. Harold, Michael and Reid are here, too. Something's wrong with Abe."
Nicola's blood ran cold.
"What's wrong? What is it? Was he in an accident?"
"No accident," Lea said. "He developed terrible chest pain. Harold had to force him to go to the emergency room. He's being evaluated right now. I—I thought you would want to know."
"Which hospital?" Nicola asked, throwing off her covers.
Lea told her and Nicola hung up. Her heart beating a mile a minute, she stripped off her nightgown and blindly reached for a sweater and slacks.
There's something wrong with Abe.
Her hands shook as she pulled the zipper up on her slacks.
There's something wrong with Abe.
A sob escaped her throat. He couldn't die. What if she lost him? What if her baby never met his father? Unable to do anything with her hair, she pulled it up in a loose bun, yanked on some socks, stepped into shoes and grabbed a cloak.
She was so rattled she had to return to the house for her purse. Jamming the keys int
o the ignition of her car, she started toward the hospital with a thousand prayers on her lips.
Bursting through the E.R. doors, Nicola immediately spotted Harold, Lea, Michael and Abe's son Reid. "How is he?" she asked. "Have you heard anything yet?"
Harold shook his head. "Sorry." He reached for her and embraced her. "The good news is he was conscious when we brought him in and giving me hell for making him come to the E.R."
Nicola nodded, feeling a sliver of relief, but still anxious. "How did you know? How did it happen?"
"I found him in the kitchen. He was doubled over clutching his chest. Scared the daylights out of me." Harold ran a nervous hand over his thinning hair. "You know he's strong as an ox. Nothing gets to him. He can run on less sleep and less food than us normal mortals. He's got more energy than men half his age. I just take for granted that he's going to be Superman forever, but you know even Superman had to deal with kryptonite."
Nicola felt her panic return. Abe doubled over, clutching his chest. The image of it stopped her heart. She swallowed over her dry throat. "How long has he—"
"We've been here a little over an hour. If we don't hear something soon, I'll talk to the nurse."
Nicola wanted to talk to the nurse now. She wanted to go to Abe and make sure he was okay.
Harold took her hands. "You're as pale as a ghost and your hands are cold as ice. Abe hasn't said anything the last few days, but I can tell something's bothering him. Do you have any ideas?"
Guilt suffused her. "We talked the other day and it ended badly. I haven't talked with him since." Her eyes burned and her throat closed up. She fought tears, but they overflowed. "He can't die, Harold," she whispered. "He can't die."
* * *
"I'm going to kill my brother," Abe said to the attending physician.
"Your brother may have saved your life, Mr. Danforth. A bleeding ulcer can kill. As long as you take your medication regularly and watch your diet, then you'll be fine."
"Okay, so I can get out of this blasted nightgown and go home now?"
The doctor nodded. "Would you like me to talk to your family?"
"No. I want to see their faces when I tell them I'm finally getting ulcers instead of just giving them," Abe said.
