by Emily Camp
“I can look at it for you when you finish.”
“I don’t want you reading my inner thoughts.” How awkward would that be?
“It doesn’t have to be your inner thoughts. It can be about what you ate for breakfast.”
“Wheaties.” I tapped the pencil again, chewed on my bottom lip.
“Really?”
“Hey, Lanyard does smile.” I pointed to him, catching him mid-grin.
Immediately, it was gone, and he was back to his stone-cold expression and then he cleared his throat.
“You know it’s not a sin to grin,” I said as I turned the paper toward me.
“Let’s get back to work.” And there he went talking again. I stared at the ceiling. Every year art students got to paint some of the ceiling tiles. The one above us was a painting of a football helmet. That made me think of Dylan. Thinking of Dylan made me remember that Jack was on the football team.
“What position do you play?” I asked as he was mid-sentence about haikus.
“Huh?” He moved his eyes toward me, but kept his body hunkered over the book. This made his forehead wrinkle.
“Dylan told me you’re on the football team. What position are you?”
“Oh,” his shoulders relaxed and he let out a breath, “bench warmer.” And he cracked another smile. I was killing it today. “Except we don’t sit on the bench, we stand on the side lines. I’m a receiver, like your boyfriend, but I never actually catch the ball, so … there’s that.”
“Why are you on the team if you never get to play?” I picked at the eraser on my pencil. As long as I kept him talking, I wouldn’t have to do actual work.
He shrugged. “Just because I’m not good at it doesn’t mean I don’t like football. Besides, the more I’m involved in, the better it looks on a college application.”
“Is that why you tutor?”
“Pretty much.” He tapped the eraser of his pencil on the table. “Do you want to read more or write your poem?”
“I’d prefer to write my poem in private.” The thought of him watching me while I wrote was even weirder than him watching me read.
“We can talk triangles.” He slid my geometry over.
“What is your obsession with triangles? I mean I myself enjoy a good love triangle even if they are cliché and all, but …”
“That’s good to hear, because there are some in Great Expectations and The Great Gatsby which are both on your reading list.”
I let out an exasperated sigh. “I mean love triangles from this century, like Bella, Jacob and Edward. Katniss, Peeta and Gale.”
“You like to read?”
“I watched the movies.” I held my chin up. “Don’t even get me started on the best love triangle ever, Lucas, Brooke, and Peyton.”
“Who?”
“Oh yeah, Serena, Nate, and Dan. I’m still bummed Serena ended up with Dan. I mean come on, he was Gossip Girl. Did she not remember all the horrible things he said about her? Besides Nate is ... if Serena don’t want him, I’ll take him, just sayin’…” I looked up and realized I should have shut my mouth a while ago. There he was, arms across his chest and blank expression on his face. “But we’ll talk about your triangles.”
“Right triangles?” He gave me a hint of a smile.
I couldn’t deny, he wasn’t terrible looking with a grin on his face. Addi was right, he was kind of cute. Today hadn’t been so bad. Hopefully, that meant I would be out of here soon and things could get back to normal.
Chapter Six
I was at my locker when Dylan came up to me. He looked good, all broad shouldered in his navy and light blue jersey. “You coming to the game?”
“Yeah.” Why wouldn’t I?
Addi smiled at me from her locker two doors down.
He grinned sideways. Maybe Dylan could tutor Jack on how to smile. Boys just look better with smiles. Dylan got down on one knee. I looked around the hall. People were staring and whispering. Addi gave me a thumbs up.
“Uh what are you doing,” I asked. This was odd.
He pulled his white jersey out from under his arm. “Will you be my girlfriend and wear my jersey tonight?”
“Only if you stand up right now.” I leaned forward making my hair cover my face even if everyone knew who I was.
He laughed and stood. Then he gave me a big hug, lifting me off the ground. “Go Bulldogs.”
The people around us echoed. “Go Bulldogs.”
I slipped the jersey on over my shirt. I was going to wear it the rest of the day. It even smelled like him. Like laundry detergent and boy soap.
After he left, Addi came flying toward me.
“Now we can match.” Though she didn’t have Tyler’s shirt on right now, she would at the game tonight. A few people congratulated me as if we were engaged now, not just taking our friends status to more.
***
I sat in the stands beaming with pride. Addi and everyone cheered around me. The announcer called, “That’s another touchdown for Dylan Andrews. Bulldog fans, he’s on fire.”
Gavin sat at my side munching on his popcorn, his eyes wide in amazement. He asked me three times if that was my boyfriend. Each time I said yes, his grin grew wider. I didn’t mind bringing my little brother when my mom asked me to babysit tonight while she went on her date. I had my date tomorrow.
As I watched Dylan though, I couldn’t help but look for Jack on the sidelines. He was standing by Tyler. After Addi showed me which one he was, I had a hard time not glancing at him. I should have known before she even pointed him out. He was the tallest one. His hands were hooked in the collar of his jersey and one knee slightly bent. His head was tilted to the side as if his helmet was heavy.
“Do you want to meet Dylan?” I asked Gavin when the game was over. We won by so much the game was boring at the end.
“Yeah.” His eyes lit up in amazement as everyone filed down the bleachers around us. I maneuvered my way out and we went down the stairs, across the track, and on to the field. The band played our pep song.
His hair drenched in sweat, Dylan winked at me as his coach, Mr. Radcliffe, gave a speech. Jack stood a few rows behind Dylan. When I looked at him, he was staring at me. For a split second, I thought he might have smiled before he turned to his coach, all serious.
Dylan found his way to me once the speeches were over. He wrapped me in a hug and kissed me. In the commotion I’d lost Addi, but spotted her several people away with Tyler.
“My little brother wants to meet you.” I said putting a hand on Gavin’s back when Dylan sat me down.
Gavin stepped forward in awe. Someone tapped Dylan’s shoulder. “The paper wants a statement,” they said.
“Okay.” He turned to me and held up a finger. “I’ll be right back.” Then he was off, not even acknowledging Gavin.
“It’s the news.” I patted him on the head. “You know how that is.”
“Being a celebrity is tough.” A deep voice came from behind me. I turned to see Jack. His hair wasn’t sweaty like Dylan’s, but it was smashed down from his helmet. “Can’t disappoint the Bulldog fans.”
“Hey Lanyard.”
“Who’s your date?” He nodded toward Gavin, his helmet hanging from his hand.
“My brother, Gavin, he plays for the Little Dogs.” Which is what we called our peewee team.
“Oh yeah,” Jack crouched down to Gavin’s height. “What position do you play?”
“I usually play fullback, but tomorrow I get to be quarterback.” Gavin had been telling everyone tonight.
“Quarterback? Wow.” Jack said with as much excitement as Gavin just had. “You must be a good thrower.”
“I’ve been practicing all season.” Gavin mimed throwing a football. “Kacey’s been helping me.”
“She has?” Jack looked up at me.
“Yep.” Gavin held his chin high.
“Maybe she should join the football team.”
I looked over my shoulder at Dylan, who was still
talking to that reporter. I had to admit it was cool to be dating the guy who was MVP of the game.
“You look different without the lanyard and your …” I pointed to Jack’s face when I turned back around. “Glasses.” He actually had nice, dark eyes I’d never noticed before.
Just as I was noticing his eyes, I was lifted in the air from behind. I let out a loud squeal. “This isn’t educational support, four-point-oh.” Cody said before he put me down.
Jack’s almost-smile turned to a scowl.
“Put my girl down, QB.” Dylan jogged toward us.
Cody laughed and put my feet on the ground with a thud.
“You’re the quarterback.” Gavin looked up at Cody in awe.
“Yes, I am.” Cody patted him on the shoulder.
“I’m playing quarterback tomorrow for the Little Dogs.”
“Sweet.” Cody replied just as someone called his name. Cody waved at them, but didn’t leave us, he turned back to Dylan. “Where’s the party?”
“Didn’t you hear? It’s at Landry’s.” Dylan hitched a thumb toward Jack.
Jack shook his head and rolled his eyes. Just as he was walking away, Dylan called out, “Hey, Jack.”
Jack turned back to us.
“Do you think you could work a little harder in educational support? I need my girl to entertain me in study hall.”
Again, Jack didn’t reply.
Cody began to talk about how they were going to get the beer for the night.
“Good luck with your game.” Jack said to Gavin as Dylan and Cody gabbed. Then Jack nodded a goodbye to me and walked away.
Dylan turned to me, sweat still dripping from his hair. “You wanna come?”
“I can’t.” I pointed to Gavin. “Have my brother.”
“Bummer,” he didn’t even look at Gavin or say hello before he kissed me on the cheek and said. “Talk to you later.”
Gavin didn’t seem too down about Dylan not talking to him, because Cody and Jack had. Even if Jack didn’t play tonight, he wore the uniform that Gavin dreamed about wearing one day.
I walked over to Addi, she stood at Tyler’s side. I still couldn’t believe she took him back. Tyler’s uniform was clean just like Jack’s. Unlike Cody and Dylan’s.
“Hey.” Addi said, looking over my shoulder. “Where’s Dylan?”
“He’s busy.” I pointed behind me where everyone waited to get a chance to talk to him.
Tyler talked to the group beside him, his helmet hanging from his hands, barely taking notice of Addi. Then he turned toward us. “Hey,” he leaned toward Addi. “Are you coming to the party?”
Addi looked at me. “Are we?”
“I’m babysitting,” I said, “but you can go.”
She looked at Tyler who watched her expectantly, and then said, “I’m staying with Kacey.”
“She just said you could go.” He pointed toward me, his jaw slack.
“Ty.” She tilted her head and bounced on her toes.
“What’s the deal? You were the one saying we haven’t seen each other enough.”
“I’m serious, go.” Because I knew what a big deal this was. As freshman we were never invited to parties. Now that we were sophomores, it was a novelty to be invited.
She looked at me. “I’ll be over later.”
“Okay.” I said, and I meant it. I understood wanting to spend time with your boyfriend. I just hoped that things didn’t end as badly with Tyler this time and that he truly had changed for her, but it didn’t seem that way.
Chapter Seven
“I think you need new glasses!” A burly man a few seats down from us shouted.
My mom leaned forward in her fold-up chair and glared at him. He didn’t take his eyes off the game long enough to see her death stare. After what felt like forever, she sat back and huffed. “It’s just a kid’s game.” Loud enough for others to hear her. Though I wasn’t sure the burly man did.
I watched as Jack ran across the field, following the short players. In black and white stripes, he looked taller. A whistle hung around his neck in place of his lanyard. How did he have time to referee a kid’s game with school and football? He wasn’t bothered by the man yelling at him. The more I was around Jack the more I noticed how much he didn’t care about other’s opinions. Part of me wished I could be like that.
Jack threw a flag at the end of the play. The man yelled at him again, his face red and spittle flying from his mouth. I hadn’t seen what happened, but I’m sure it was a fair call. He’d been making them all day. Bulldogs had two peewee teams that were playing one another right now. The Little Dogs and the Bulls. Gavin was doing a good job as quarterback.
When I texted Dylan earlier to see if he could come with me, he’d replied that he was too hungover, but he would see me tonight. It was okay, we hadn’t technically been a couple for 24 hours. I didn’t expect him to watch my brother play. I just knew Gavin would be excited if he did.
After Gavin took a knee for the final play to run the clock down, he looked over at me and mom. He beamed with pride. My mom, who was mid-clap, stopped long enough to give him a thumbs up. Then he was off with his teammates high-fiving the other team.
“Great job.” My mom hugged him when he came running to us.
“Did you see that pass?” He wiggled from her grasp.
“Yeah, that was awesome.” I said, ruffling his sweaty hair.
I spotted Jack who was conversing on the other side of the field with the other referees. He jogged toward me when he saw me watching. His ball cap hiding his normal poof of hair that sat on top his head. I didn’t want him to come over here and say something about the tutoring in front of my mom.
“Good game, Gavin.” He held out a fist.
“Thanks, Jack.” Gavin bumped his knuckles.
When the coaches called for the players, Gavin handed his helmet to mom and jogged back on to the field. My mom stood there watching me and Jack with a weird smile on her face, Gavin’s helmet tucked under her arm. I hoped she didn’t ask too many questions.
“Hey.” Jack said to me with the slightest of smiles on his face. Another smile, that was a record.
“Hey.” I replied though had to keep this short because the last thing I needed before my date with Dylan tonight was for mom to find out how badly I’d been doing in school.
He stood there as if waiting for me to say something else, but I looked out on the field and watched as my brother’s coach gave a speech to the third and fourth grade boys. I wondered why Jack didn’t say anything about reffing this game last night when we talked to him.
I pretended not to notice my mom staring at us.
Jack nodded, “I’ll see you at school.”
I was thankful he didn’t finish that sentence with a comment about tutoring.
“Yeah.”
He waited a beat before jogging away.
“Who was that?” My mom whispered as she nudged my arm like she was my best friend.
“A boy that goes to my school,” I leaned away from her.
“I think he likes you.”
What did she just say? I looked toward Jack, luckily, he was too far to hear.
“He does not.” I said under my breath, she had no clue. Just because a boy talked to me did not mean he liked me.
“You, my dear, are clueless.”
I am not. She didn’t know the context in which Jack knew me. It was not like he even said anything to me but hey and I’ll see you at school. But instead of going into that I said, “He’s a senior.”
“So?”
“I have a boyfriend.” So please stop trying to pimp me out to my tutor, okay? A boy whose only reason for speaking to me was so he could put it on his college applications.
“Speaking of the boyfriend, does Dylan know your curfew?”
“Yes, mother.” I sighed. “Speaking of curfews, you got in late last night.” I always liked to give her a hard time about her dates, if she was going to insist on giving me one.
> She sighed, “I’m an adult.”
My eyes drifted back toward Jack who was drinking from a water bottle and talking to another ref.
“And it looks like you might like him.” My mom’s voice was right in my ear.
“Mom,” I flinched away from her. “I do not like Jack.”
My mom smiled at me as if she didn’t believe me. Whatever, I didn’t have to explain myself to her.
***
When we arrived at the party, Dylan stayed near me with his hand on my lower back as we moved around the crowd, which wasn’t much of a crowd, but enough.
He didn’t drink. His friends were not only drinking, but badgering him about it. All was going great, even though he called my brother Grayson when he picked me up. I could forgive that. Grayson, Gavin, it was close. We went upstairs when the party got too loud. I was okay with this at first, I didn’t mind the occasional make out session with a boy. Actually, I looked forward to it. We laid on our backs on the bed beside one another, staring at the lights from the traffic outside glide across the ceiling.
We talked about school, football, my brother. He tried to talk about educational support, but I changed the subject. He reached over and took my hand which, I had flat on the bed between us, hoping for him to make the first move.
The butterflies in my stomach woke. I smiled to the ceiling. His thumbed grazed back and forth on my wrist. The entire time I was consumed with the smell of his earthy cologne. It was different than what he smelled like at school, but it wasn’t bad.
He then turned toward me, put his free hand to my cheek. I looked at him. When we kissed, I felt it in my toes. Soon he was above me. I liked the feel of his weight on my chest. He kissed my neck then my collar bone, and back to my lips. His hands grazed back and forth across my stomach where my shirt had ridden up.
I used my hand to push his down when he went for my bra. He must have too this as a cue for something else, not a cue that I didn’t want to go that far, because he reached for the button on my jeans.
“Stop.” I said, but it came out breathless.
I barely had him pushed off me before he was unzipping my zipper. All the butterflies came to a screeching halt as I pushed harder and said a firm, “No.”
