by Emily Camp
“Apply myself?” I crumbled the empty wrapper in my fist. “Now you sound like Mr. Radcliffe.”
“You did call me Mr. Landry when we first met, remember?” He smiled and I liked that he was smiling.
“Mr. Lanyard, to be exact.” I pointed toward the lanyard hanging from his neck.
“I can’t …” he trailed off.
“You can’t what?”
“Nothing.” He looked away from me.
Between us, on the hardwood floors, his fingers grazed mine. I moved my hand to my lap.
“You think we could get to work now?” He said pointing to my backpack. “I told Miss. Deeter we would.”
I groaned, “Miss Deeter. Did Cody say anything?”
“Who cares about him?” He nodded toward my backpack.
“I do.” I looked at Jack like he was crazy. Who cared about Cody? That would be me, despite how he just broke up with me. It wasn’t like I could turn that off like a tap or something.
“Right, sorry.” He dug through his bag again and pulled out another granola bar and tried to hand it to me.
I shook my head, “I don’t need to go into sugar shock.”
“Are you diabetic?” He said in all seriousness.
“No.” This made me smile. “I just don’t need any more chocolate right now.”
He put the bar back.
“You keep a large stash in there for crying girls?”
“It’s my last one.” He zipped his bag.
“I was joking.” Even though I didn’t want to, I opened my backpack and pulled out my biology book.
“Kacey,” he said.
“Yeah?”
“Cody will regret it.”
“Thanks.” And his shoulder touching mine didn’t seem as awkward as it did a minute ago.
After a beat of eye contact, Jack looked away and took in a deep breath. “We’re losing good working time.”
“Right. Can’t lose that working time.”
“You’re almost out of here.” He pulled my book to his lap and opened it.
“Is that why you want to work? So, you can get rid of me?” I said as a joke, but I wasn’t sure I wanted to be rid of Jack. I was going to miss him.
“Not at all.” He said quickly enough that my breath caught.
Did Jack like me like that?
Not possible.
“But when you’re out of here, I’ll still help you.”
I had a habit of reading more into things than what they were. I knew that had to be the case now. I was a mess. I liked boys. Some would say I was a bit boy-crazy. It wasn’t that I meant to have a lot of boyfriends, just that things never seemed to work out. Today made me think about my life. About boys. Maybe I should just take a break, breathe. Not assume a boy liked me just because he told me I was pretty or said something kind.
Chapter Thirteen
I shoved the Ohio State t-shirt I stole from Cody and ticket stubs from his football games in a box. Then I pushed that box as far back under my bed as possible. I moved the rest of the junk that resided under there in front of it. It was my way of burying Cody. Even though my heart still hurt. I thought we would be together for a while. I’d imagined Christmas, he’d come over here and I would go to his house. It wasn’t even that far away from now. I thought for sure we’d still be together by then. I thought about sledding when we had snow days, his arms caging me in. I even had my prom dress picked out. I just wanted someone I could depend on. Was that too much to ask? Someone I could call whenever I was having a bad day to make me forget. Someone I could laugh with when I was feeling silly. Someone consistent in my life.
Addi burst through my door, making me jump and almost fall off my bed. “What happened?”
My self-pity party had ended when I pushed his stuff deep under my bed. From here on out, I was over Cody even if I still had a trace of the breakup on my face. My eyes were still red and puffy. My makeup worn off from tears.
“He likes Serena.”
“Come here.” Addi held her arms out, tilting her head. Then came at me with one of her tight bear hugs.
“I can’t breathe.”
She flopped down beside me. “He’s a jerk.”
I shrugged.
“He’ll regret it.”
Funny Jack said those same words earlier.
“I don’t want to talk about it.” I said. “I’m over it.”
“You should go out with Tyler’s cousin, Mason, on Friday.”
“I’m done with boys.” At least for now.
“He doesn’t want to like hook up or anything. He just needs someone to make his ex-jealous. You can go to the basketball game, too, let Cody see you.”
“I’ll be too busy feeling sorry for myself.” I leaned back and covered my face with a pillow. Even though five minutes ago I resolved that I was over him, just the mention of his name made my heart heavy.
“You will not.” Addi removed the pillow. “You didn’t let me when Tyler and I broke up. I’m not letting you.”
***
I was not in the mood for Educational Support. I flopped down in my chair. Left my books in my bag, crossed my arms across my chest and stared straight ahead. What did any of this matter if I was just going to get crap grades anyway? Sure, it didn’t help that I took the test the day after Cody broke up with me. But still, I tried. I knew the material.
The bell rang, and as usual, Jack strolled in a couple minutes late. Cody’s voice was loud and annoying today. Jack tossed his backpack on the floor beside him. The chair scraped as he pulled it out.
“What are we working on?” he flopped down on the chair.
“Nothing. What’s the point?” The week just kept getting worse.
“Whoa.” Jack looked over his shoulder as if to see if I was talking to someone else. “Where did that come from?”
“I got a D on the Romeo and Juliet test.”
“How? We … you knew that stuff.”
“I thought I did.” I glared at the empty table.
“You still have your compare and contrast essay.”
“I’m not writing it.” I wished Cody wasn’t so freaking loud with his stupid annoying laugh.
“You have to.”
“No, I don’t.”
“Yes, you do.”
I glared at him, “I’m not going to write it because what’s the point if I’m just going to get a D anyway?”
“You’re not going to get a D, because I’m going to proofread it.”
“So, you’re admitting I’m not capable of doing it on my own.”
“Get your book out.” He sighed and pointed toward my backpack.
“Yes Sir, Lanyard.” I huffed and pulled the Romeo and Juliet paperback out along with the assignment rubric and a sheet of paper. My phone went off in my pocket, but I ignored it. It was probably Mason. He’d texted me after Addi gave him my phone number. I’d finally agreed to go on that date.
Ignoring my Lanyard comment, Jack looked at the rubric. “First identify what versions you are comparing, that’s easy enough.”
I didn’t respond, just tapped my pencil on the page. I could feel him staring at me, but I didn’t care.
“Whatever.” He huffed and leaned back in his chair. I felt his eyes boring into the side of my face. I looked up at him and he glared his flat-mouthed look that had absolutely no emotion in it. It ticked me off, as it always did.
“Why do you have to look at me like that?”
“Like what?” he deadpanned but wouldn’t quit staring. Fine, two could play this game. I turned my head toward him and glared right back into his eyes. Just like he was doing to me. It seemed we were in a staring contest now and neither one of us budged.
Did it all come down to who was more stubborn? That was easy, me. Or maybe it wasn’t. I was starting to feel uncomfortable. It was like he was a mind stealer or something from one of those weird Sci-fi movies my brother loved and he was stealing my brain’s thoughts. It didn’t help that Cody’s voice and s
tupid laugh carried. Why didn’t Miss Deeter tell him he needed to be quieter? Or better yet, stick him in the single study room.
I could not let Jack win. Did he ever blink? Was he some kind of alien? Why was I just noticing the golden flecks in his eyes? My heart sped up and it felt like the walls were closing in on us. This room was too small, the table too little. As much as I tried to win this fight, I couldn’t. I was weak. Finally, I looked away.
“Are we done yet?” His know-it-all voice was almost as irritating as Cody’s cackle on the other side of the room.
“Fine.” I looked down at the blank notebook page.
“Write.”
I wanted to growl at him, something about Jack brought out my spirit animal. It had rabies. But I restrained myself, picked up my pencil, and began to write. It didn’t make any sense, but I was jotting words on the page anyway.
When it was finished, he looked over it. I couldn’t watch his expressions at how dumb my paper was. I’m sure it sounded horrible. Instead, I doodled as I listened to his pencil glide across the page marking all the mistakes I’d made. I scribbled out Cody’s name in my notebook. I jotted down Mason, just to see how it would look. Testing it out. I hadn’t even met Mason in person yet. I had no idea if I’d even like him as a friend. I only saw his picture. He was cute, his skin dark, was a surprise, considering he was Tyler’s cousin and Tyler was about the whitest white boy I knew. Mason’s mom was black, his dad, Tyler’s uncle, was white.
“Okay.” Jack slid the paper toward me. “The content looks good. I just put in some minor suggestions on your grammar and some rewording.” Grammar, why did I hate that word so much?
I looked at the writing. It was scribbled all over. He called that minor changes? I called it a complete rewrite, which, yeah, I knew I should have another draft, but really what was the point?
I grudgingly made the changes as I rewrote the essay on a clean sheet. Jack watched me like a cat stalking its prey. I knew I was being dramatic, but I was in a bad mood and Jack wasn’t helping any. What happened to the sweet understanding boy he was the other day? Maybe I needed to cry again.
The bell didn’t ring soon enough. I practically jumped out of my seat when it did, gathering my things in a rush and shoving the papers in my backpack. Later they would be a wrinkled mess, but I didn’t care as long as it got me away from Jack.
As soon as I was in the hall, I checked my phone. It was a Mason selfie. He was smiling with a pair of goggles we use in science class on his face. It was captioned Do these make me look fat?
I laughed.
I took a picture of myself standing in front of the ‘educational support’ sign. I made a thumbs down and pouted my lip out.
He replied with, you look cute when you make that face.
I sent back you look cute in goggles.
I was rockin’ them, I know. He replied
Yes, you were. I replied. It was good to have something to keep my mind off all the drama today.
Even though I bucked at the thought of going out with him, when we exchanged pictures, I was pleased with what I saw. His hair was short on the sides, almost shaved bare and a little longer on top. I definitely wasn’t looking for another boyfriend right now, but it didn’t hurt to be friends if we were going to go on a date to make our exes jealous.
Chapter Fourteen
The gym already smelled like sweat and the game hadn’t even started yet. Cody, still in his warmup gear, dribbled toward the basket. This was the first real game of the season. When we were together, Cody had told me how he thought he was going to play varsity. I found it funny to see him out there warming up with the JV. Mason had his hand on my back as we walked into the gym. Cody gave me a double take when we went past him. He had the ball, aiming for the hoop. He missed. I couldn’t help but smile and pretend I didn’t even notice. Cody might have been a starter on the football team, but he wasn’t that great as a basketball player. Addi, who was walking at Tyler’s side in front of us, looked back, grinned and gave me a thumbs up. Yes, so far everything was going as planned.
We made our way to the student section. Maria glared at me. Good, I was the one here with the mysteriously hot guy, not her. Turned out though because of sports, Tyler, and, social media Mason knew a lot of people from my school. Dylan in particular. And that was who we sat with. Cody kept glancing up at us throughout the game. Then when Serena, was on the top of the cheer pyramid, she wobbled. I tried not to take too much delight in that. I was a horrible person.
“I wish she’d fall,” Addi whispered to me.
“That’s mean,” I said. Though I couldn’t deny that thought hadn’t crossed my mind.
“It’s mean to steal someone’s boyfriend,” Addi said.
“If he had truly liked me enough, he couldn’t have been stolen.” At least that’s what my mom said when I told her about the break up. And she was right. It was better to find this out now than it would be in six months or so. If he really cared about me like he said through his lying teeth, then nobody would have stolen him from me in the first place.
The gym began to feel stuffy. The squeaking sneakers grated my nerves.
I leaned toward Addi and Mason, “Want anything from concession?” I shouted over the crowd. I hoped Mason would offer to go, but he was too engrossed in his conversation with Dylan and Tyler to leave. He just shook his head.
“No thanks.” Addi said, her hand firmly wrapped in Tyler’s. He probably just didn’t want her to go.
As I stood in the long line, I wasn’t sure why I picked half-time to get my soda.
“Get your paper done?” A deep voice said from behind me, his breath on the back of my neck. I jumped and flung an arm out like I was going to karate chop him.
His reflexes were quick because he grabbed me by the wrist, not hard, just enough to keep from getting hit.
“Awfully jumpy.” Jack smirked, his hair was damp with sweat. He wore a hoodie that said Bulldog Wrestling on the front and a pair of athletic shorts.
“Don’t sneak up on me like that.” I straightened my sweater. Normally I would have worn a Bulldogs shirt. Since this was a first date, I thought I’d dress a little bit nicer for the occasion. Especially since we were going to a party afterward.
“I just asked you a question.” He shoved his hands in the front pocket of his hoodie.
“Creepily.”
The lady in front of me moved after getting her popcorn and drink.
“Can I help you?” The parent behind the counter asked.
“Coke please.” I dug money out of my pocket.
“Your date isn’t going to pay,” Jack said.
“What?” I said as the lady gave me my Coke and I handed her the cash. It wasn’t like it was 1950. A girl could pay for herself.
Then the lady asked Jack, “Can I help you?”
“No thanks.” He said though he was eyeing the pizza that the last person carried away.
I moved out of the way for the kid behind me. “Are you hungry? Do you need money?” Even though I didn’t even think about the fact both his parents were doctors. I was sure he had money.
He put a hand to his stomach. “I’m three pounds over.”
“Overweight?” He sure didn’t look overweight to me.
“For my weight class.” He nodded. “Have a meet tomorrow.”
“You’re going to lose 3 pounds overnight?”
“If I sweat a lot and don’t eat anything until after weigh-in.” Even over the noisy crowd I thought I heard his stomach growl.
“When’s weigh in?”
“Tomorrow morning.”
“You can’t eat anything?” I couldn’t imagine that.
“Not unless I don’t want to wrestle.”
“How can you be here by the concessions?”
“The smell makes me think I’m eating,” he said. We made our way through the crowd, back to the gym.
“If I couldn’t eat, I wouldn’t want to be around food.” I said. We walked into t
he gym. I was glad I didn’t get anything else. I would feel bad if I scarfed down pizza in front of him.
“Is he your date or Dylan’s?” he nodded toward the student section.
“I know right?” I looked up at the stands where Mason and Dylan were laughing and making big gestures with their hands, high-fiving. “How’d you know he’s my date?”
“Saw you come in earlier.”
He noticed me walk in?
“Did you purposely track him down on social media or something to tick Cody off?” Jack fidgeted with the draw strings on his hoodie.
“He’s Tyler’s cousin.” I said, pointing toward Addi and Tyler who were perched on the other side of Mason.
“You do know that Cody and Mason hate each other, right?”
“What?” I did not. “But Dylan.” Dylan was Cody’s best friend and now he was acting like he was Mason’s.
“Guys aren’t like girls we can be friends with people our friends don’t like.”
“Girls aren’t like that,” I said.
He raised an eyebrow.
“Not all of us are, okay?” Though, the fact that Addi hated Serena and Maria was because of me.
I looked up at Mason. Knowing that he hated Cody actually did make him more attractive.
“Good luck at your wrestling meet tomorrow.” I twisted the cap on my soda. “I probably shouldn’t say break a leg, right?”
“I cannot wrestle with a broken leg.” He nodded then made his way to the student section.
Instead of maneuvering my way back to Mason, I stood down here and waved to get his and Addi’s attention. We had stayed for a least half of the JV game. It was too hot, and too sticky, and too noisy for me. Everyone saw my hot date. We made my ex jealous now it was time to move on and make his jealous. Just knowing that Cody and Mason hated one another and Cody saw him here with me was enough.
Chapter Fifteen
Mason was greeted with hoots and hollers, high fives and half-hugs as we strolled through the party. He kept his arm hooked around my shoulders as he fist bumped and waved at his friends.
Girls glared at us. I wasn’t surprised to be the most hated girl at this party. Here with the hostess’ ex. I knew immediately who she was. The tall one with long, platinum hair in the middle of the gaggle of glaring girls. He’d showed me pictures of her during our late-night texting session. As she stood leaning against the counter talking with the other girls in her crop top and skinny jeans, she tossed her hair over her shoulder, looked me up and down with her beady eyes, before going back to her conversation.
