by Emily Camp
“Not since I was eight. I don’t remember much, except I wasn’t good at it.”
“I’m not the greatest, myself.” I put the hot chocolate to my mouth.
“You may not want to do that.”
“Huh?”
“It’s spiked.”
I looked behind me. It wasn’t like I hadn’t been around parties, “But it’s a school night.”
“That’s what I said,” he shrugged.
“There are waters in a cooler.”
I didn’t want water. I was looking forward to hot chocolate. But, I left it on the table anyway.
“You going to show me how to snowboard?” He asked as I opened the cooler for a water. It didn’t have ice in it, that wasn’t needed. Not today, anyway.
“Yeah, that would be a negative.” I laughed. “I’m here for the sleds.” And the romance of going down the hill with Dylan behind me, his arms and legs caging me in.
“Maybe Dylan can teach me something.” Jack nodded toward Dylan who stood at the edge of the hill, poised on his snowboard.
He leaned forward and began to ease down the hill. It was interesting to watch for a second. He had on his helmet and his reflective goggles, but then he went falling face first and rolled.
“That’s about how it went for me, too.” Jack scratched his chin.
I couldn’t help but laugh along with everyone else. Dylan huffed turned over to his bottom and unstrapped the snowboard.
“Doesn’t look like he can teach you anything either,” I said.
“Noted.” He took a sip of water. “I missed you at school this week.”
“Me too.” I said and meant it. I hated we hadn’t spent more time together since New Year’s. But it wasn’t awkward like I thought it would be. It seemed since I no longer needed tutored, I rarely saw him at school.
“Hitting on my girl, Landry,” Dylan said, slapping him on the back. His helmet off and his goggles hanging around his neck.
“Just talking,” Jack said a little too quickly.
Dylan draped his arm around my shoulders, again it was heavy and pulled on my braid. I adjusted to free it.
“Sorry man, she’s not coming back to you.”
Jack’s skin turned pink. “She …”
Dylan let out a loud laugh that hurt my ears. “I mean in ES, dude.” He punched Jack in the arm. Then went for the table, “This mine?” He lifted the hot chocolate I’d poured.
“Yeah.” I shared a look with Jack, knowing full well that Dylan wouldn’t care if it did have alcohol in it. In fact, I would think he was the one who had put it there if I hadn’t have shown up with him just a few minutes before I tried to pour it.
“This is good.” He bobbed his head.
“Let’s see that again, Tony Hawk,” Cody shouted over the roaring fire.
Dylan held the cup in the air. “Maybe after a few more of these.”
That sounded like a solid idea.
“Let’s go on the sled.” I tugged on his arm. I wanted to go down before he got too drunk.
“Give me a minute.” He tipped his drink back.
“Yo, Dylan.” Someone called from the other side of the yard. Dylan waved then turned toward me. “I’ll be right back.” Then he was gone.
And he wasn’t right back. I watched Emma and Cody go down then Maria and Addi as if all of a sudden they were besties. Tyler snowboarded, the best thing of the night was seeing him fall. The sun went down and here I stood making small talk with Jack.
Finally, after what felt like I was standing here forever Jack said, “You want to go down with me.”
I scratched my elbow though it really wasn’t much of a scratch considering that my puffer coat sleeve was between my fingernail and my skin. I looked toward the crowd hovered around the fire. Dylan one of them, another cup of something in his hand though I knew it wasn’t hot chocolate now, because I’d been standing by the jug the entire time.
“Um sure.” I was here to go sledding after all. Jack and I approached the hilltop. Addi and Maria were walking up with the sled dragging behind them. They were laughing and it stung to see my best friend having so much fun with one of our enemies. I was the enemy now.
Their smiles faded when they reached us. Maria looked me up and down, then looked at Jack. Addi turned her head away as if she didn’t even know me. Jack thanked Maria said “You’re welcome,” in an irritating high pitched tone when she handed him the sled.
Jack set the sled on the edge of the hill. He held it down while I climbed on. Then he sat behind me, his long legs on either side. His arms caging me in. “Ready?” Even through all the layers we had on I could smell his soapy scent.
“Yes.” Though I wasn’t sure.
He pushed off with his feet and we went racing down the hill. I held onto the side of the sled, feeling like I couldn’t get a tight enough grip through my gloves. Snowflakes speckled my face, eyes and even stuck to my lashes. When he leaned forward we went faster, when he leaned back we slowed. The cool air whipped my face, but inside I was warm. His chest against my back was solid, keeping me safe. We veered sideways for a second, his arm came around my waist. My breath caught.
When we reached the bottom of the hill, he made a sharp turn and I went tumbling off before he could catch me. It was a good thing though, I needed to separate myself from him. I’d just now realized what a mistake this was. We were friends. That was it, just friends.
“Are you okay?” He said, reaching for me as he stood.
“Yeah, I’m good.” Other than the fact my insides were doing things they shouldn’t be doing. I didn’t take his hand. I was perfectly capable of standing on my own. Once I stood, I brushed the dusting of snow off my face. That only added more to it.
“I didn’t mean to stop that quickly,” he said.
“It’s okay.” I blinked, though it did nothing to help get the snow off my lashes.
“You cold?” he took off one of his gloves with his teeth, and then shook it out.
“A little,” that was an understatement, my face was freezing from the snow.
His now glove-free hands were on either side of my face. My heart racing. He swiped the snow from my lashes with his thumbs. I wasn’t sure how I was breathing. I should step away. I should step way back. Then as if he realized what he was doing only after staring into my eyes for what seemed like eternity, yanked away.
I blinked, waiting for my heart to return to normal. I was thankful the sky was just about dark now.
“We should.” He pointed to the hill. “Get back up there.”
I nodded and followed his lead.
Dylan hadn’t seemed to notice that little moment. He was still standing around the fire with everyone else. It was as if they all forgot about the sled and snowboard. After removing my gloves, I looked at my phone that had been tucked in my pocket. It was getting late for a school night. With the amount of snow we got we may not have school, but it wasn’t cancelled yet. I knew my mom would want me home soon. Besides, I didn’t want to be here with Cody, Maria, Tyler, and Addi.
I maneuvered my way to Dylan through the circle.
“Hey,” he said mid-sentence, smiling at me, then without even stopping his conversation, he draped an arm around my shoulders. He was talking about next year’s football team.
I waited on him to stop talking before saying, “I need to go home.”
“Already?” He practically shouted in my ear. When he did, I could smell the alcohol on his breath. He wasn’t going to be able to drive me home anyway.
“Yeah, but …”
“Try that snowboard now, man.” Someone shouted over the crowd.
“I’m ready!” Dylan called to the group.
Everyone cheered and hollered as he made his way to the snowboard.
I huffed and sank away from the crowd. I hadn’t noticed how cold it was outside the circle until I was standing out here.
“You all right?”
Jack’s voice startled me.
�
�Yeah.” I stared at Dylan as he strapped the snowboard to his feet. “No,” I turned to Jack. “I need to get home and Dylan couldn’t take me if he wanted to.”
“I can.”
“You can what?”
“I’ll drive you home,” he said.
“I …” I looked back at the hill where Dylan was actually staying up right on his way down. I was sure he wasn’t going to miss me any and I just needed to get away from here. “Okay.”
Chapter Twenty-eight
I wasn’t sure when I became comfortable enough to change the radio station while Jack was driving. This was the only boy’s car I’d done it in. He didn’t complain though, he just grinned with a glance before looking back to the road. The street was getting whiter by the minute.
“So this is starting to become our thing.” He said.
“Our thing?” I asked.
“Me driving you home from your dates.”
“Oh,” I fidgeted because I wasn’t sure what he was going to say, but I kind of wanted to have a thing with Jack. “That wasn’t technically a date.” But yet it was.
“Oh.” Jack drummed the steering wheel to the beat even though I’m sure he didn’t listen to Taylor Swift often.
When my phone buzzed, I shouldn’t have been surprised that it wasn’t Dylan. He probably wouldn’t even notice I was gone.
Instead, it was a text from my mom. Have you left yet? Roads are getting bad. Greg can pick you up.
I texted back, Jack is bringing me. On our way.
I noticed Jack tense, his hands gripping the wheel tighter.
“What is it?”
He cleared his throat. “Nothing.”
“It’s not nothing.”
“It’s getting bad out here.” He looked in his rearview mirror then back to the windshield. The wipers flicking back and forth quickly.
“Maybe we should have stayed?”
“Nah, I got it. Just …” the car barely moved. “Need to take my time. That’s all.”
Now I was nervous. I sat here watching the snow coming at us like we were going warp speed in one of Gavin’s space video games. Jack’s phone rang over the speakers. The dash lit up, Mom calling. He pushed a button on his steering wheel.
His mom’s voice came over the speakers. “Are you home?”
“I’m on my way. Just have to take Kacey home first.”
“Kacey, huh?” her voice had a sing-song tone to it.
“Mom, you’re on Bluetooth,” he groaned.
“Hi Kacey.” She said. “How close are you?”
“Hi Doctor Stephens.” I said.
“We’re about two minutes normal drive time from Kacey’s.”
“I don’t want to have to worry about you. If it’s okay with Kacey’s mom maybe you should stay there.”
My mom was just as worrisome as Jack’s. I knew she wouldn’t care. She’d probably suggest it herself. “I’m sure she won’t mind.”
Then I thought of what that meant. Jack would be at my house, possibly for the night. I’m sure Gavin would be happy about that.
***
That was how I found myself sitting around my coffee table playing Uno with Jack, Gavin, Evan, my mom and Greg. The roads were basically shut down now. Greg and Evan weren’t going anywhere. What a fun sleepover this was going to be. At least Gavin thought so. Evan sat on one side of me and Jack on the other. I didn’t know why Evan kept looking at me like he was in on a secret or something. He nudged my elbow and nodded giving me a knowing grin. I glared at him. I wanted to say, “Jack and I are just friends, dummy,” but I refrained.
Finally, my mom stood and yawned. “I’m sorry, it’s past my bedtime.” She said. Then looked at Gavin, “And yours, too.”
“But mom.” Gavin whined all dramatic like. “We don’t have school.”
School had been cancelled an hour ago, causing the four of us in school to celebrate. I’d been surprised when Jack was happy about it. I thought he loved that place.
“Listen to your mom.” Greg’s voice was gruff.
I wasn’t sure how to take that. He wasn’t Gavin’s dad. But Gavin only pouted as he stood and followed my mom.
“Thanks.” She leaned toward Greg, and her arm reached around Gavin.
“I’ll be up in a minute,” Greg said.
“Why don’t they have to go to bed?” Gavin complained as he went up the stairs.
I didn’t hear my mom’s reply.
Greg looked right at Evan. “Behave.”
It wasn’t like we hadn’t had a night together before. Last year, Greg took us all on a ski trip. But at that time Evan and I hadn’t dated yet. Evan hooked an arm around me. “Always. I won’t let anything happen to my sister.”
“I’m not your sister.” I moved away from him. That was kind of gross to think about considering I’d kissed him less than a month ago.
Earlier, my mom brought down our extra blankets and pillows for Evan and Jack to have a sleepover down here. The unlikely duo. The most wild of guys I’d dated and my most reserved friend.
“If these boys bother you, you let me know,” Greg said.
“I’m alright.” I hadn’t had a dad around for years. I didn’t need one now.
He then headed up the stairs.
“Who’s up for some truth or dare?” Evan rubbed his palms together.
I groaned.
“No.” Jack said in his matter-of-fact tone.
I knew I liked him for a reason. We shared a smile. I should go to bed now myself. It was late, but I didn’t want to leave Jack. Even though Evan was here with us, I wanted to stay down here and visit a little longer. I did need to go upstairs before I fell asleep or my mom would make a big deal of it, I was sure.
“Kacey, can you get me a soda?” Evan said.
“Do you have legs?” I wasn’t a slave. I didn’t care if this wasn’t his house, he’d been here enough to help himself.
Evan tilted his head back and let out a loud laugh.
“Geez, people are trying to sleep here,” I said.
“So, Jackie,” he said, righting himself.
“It’s Jack,” Jack said.
“What are your intentions with my sister?” Evan leaned back, lounging against the sofa, his arms stretched wide.
“Jack and I are just friends and I’m not your sister. Quit calling me that.” I tossed a pillow at his head.
“You’re going to be soon,” he ducked and caught the pillow.
I laughed at this.
“I helped my dad pick out the ring.” He sat the pillow beside him.
“What?” I sat up, almost in shock. Would she say yes? What would that mean if she did? Would we move in with them or they here with us? And what about school? My mom had never been serious enough about any of her other boyfriends to marry them. I’d never even considered this would happen.
“When we were out of town.” Evan said, as if I’d asked him to elaborate. “But enough about that, what’s going on with you two? For real.”
“We’re friends.” I sighed and looked at Jack. Who seemed cuter right now than he normally did. His hair was disheveled from the hat he’d had on when we were outside. His t-shirt hung loose on him. His face, though, was his stone-expressionless one instead of a smile, but the fact that the face was toward Evan instead of me didn’t bother me any.
“I wonder how much snow there is now.” I said, breaking my thoughts and attention from Jack. I stood up and went to the door. The wind had died down and the snow was only a trickle but everything was covered in white. Even Jack’s car.
“Snowball fight!” Evan threw open the door and ran outside. I laughed at myself when I slammed the door shut behind him and locked it.
“What?” He shrieked, holding his arms out wide.
“You’re cruel.” Jack said from behind me, but he had a hint of a smile.
“You know this is funny.”
Jack nodded. He crossed his arms and stood beside me. I could step a little bit closer and be touch
ing him. But I didn’t. Though I wanted to.
“You going to let your brother freeze?” Evan pounded on the door.
“My brother’s upstairs warm in his room.”
“Kacey.” Evan held his hands out. I figured I’d scared him enough, I unlocked the door and opened it.
“Shit.” Evan’s teeth chattered. He ran to the sofa, where he picked up a blanket and wrapped it around himself.
“Didn’t your mom teach you not to go out without a jacket?” Jack said.
I knew he was my friend for a reason.
“Maybe if your girlfriend wasn’t so cruel …”
Girlfriend. A part of me liked the sound of that. Jack didn’t correct him either.
“Want to watch a movie?” because I wasn’t ready to go upstairs.
“Sure.” Jack said.
We settled down again. Evan was like Gavin in the sense that not twenty minutes in, he was snoozing, snoring in fact.
Jack wasn’t two feet from me. I could have adjusted just a little and been against him, but I refrained.
“Are you going to go out with Dylan now?” He asked, his eyes on the television.
“I don’t know.” I said after a short pause.
I wasn’t sure if it was the snow or the time or the dark. But I kind of wanted to date Jack. He was solid and he made jokes, but not too many. When he smiled he meant it. And those freckles on the back of his neck were adorable.
“Remember when I said I needed to step up my game,” he asked.
My heart fell, because I actually had forgotten about the girl that he liked. “Yeah?” I looked up at him, but his eyes were on the TV.
“Kacey, you’re still up?” My mom’s voice made me jump. How did I not even hear her come down the stairs?
“We’re just watching a movie.” I may have said too quickly.
“Maybe you should finish it tomorrow?” She looked from Evan to Jack then me.
“Prob …probably.” I shot up. I wasn’t sure what Jack was going to say, but I didn’t want to know either. I didn’t want to hear about him crushing on another girl. “See you in the morning.” I said without even looking back at him. My mom had no idea how much I welcomed that interruption. Too many feels and thoughts surrounded Jack right now. I needed to distance myself anyway.
