With sudden force, he swept her into his arms and carried her into the first open door. He laid her on the floor’s thin carpeting and knelt down, bruising and marking her body with his hands, lips, and teeth. The act left her breathless, a little frightened, and wanting more.
Every Friday night it became their meeting place. She’d wait for him there, until midnight or into the early morning. Sometimes, when the team traveled away, he didn’t visit at all. His absence only fueled Emma’s determination to have him.
Each time they were together, they played games of their own. He’d tear at her clothes, desperate and hungry. She’d put him off, tease until he tingled from head to foot with desire. They made love on chilled exam tables, on chairs, next to volumes of veterinary books. When he was finished and spent, he’d trace the bruises he left on her delicate skin and kiss the marks, as if to say she was his. He owned her completely.
She opened her heart wide, poured herself into him. His lips burned and scorched hers, a passion Emma couldn’t imagine. There was nothing she wouldn’t do to see him. She shed every bit of herself. She went willingly, carrying secrets and dreams.
2016
When Allie rang the bell, Emma jumped, checked the clock on the wall, and calculated how long it would take for Caroline to show up.
Tick. Tock.
“Right on time,” Emma said, balancing plates with one hand as she opened the door wide. She tilted her head in the direction of the living room. “Come on in. I made up some chicken salad.”
Allie shrugged off her jacket, draped it over the edge of the sofa, and collapsed into a chair. “Sounds great.”
“I can’t take the credit. Mom’s creation.” Emma stepped into the kitchen and retrieved the bowl from the refrigerator. As she lifted the lid, she glanced at her sister. Beneath the cheery exterior, her sister was nervous.
Allie pursed her lips and glanced at the clock, kneading her hands.
“Um, and so, by the way, did you know that Ben’s back in town?” Emma asked, a smile playing on her lips. “I ran into him at the grocery store about an hour ago.”
Allie stopped rubbing her hands, frozen as if she’d seen a ghost. “Ben?”
“He’s been back for a while, actually, maybe a couple weeks,” Emma added. “His parents moved to Florida, so he’s living in their old house. The word around town is that he’s disillusioned with the whole political scene and quit whatever campaign he was working on.”
Allie nodded and blinked rapidly, shell-shocked at the announcement.
Ben, ever the knight in shining armor, had pledged to wait for her sister. Emma curled her lip in satisfaction as Allie glanced away. Her sister had returned Ben’s loyalty by breaking off their engagement and breaking his heart.
Emma knew that just the thought of Ben so close would add another heavy layer to Allie’s already-substantial stress.
Sure, Emma knew it was logical for Allie to let Ben go. Allie had agonized afterward for more than a year, confiding several times in Emma that it was one of the most awful decisions she’d had to make. But Allie had sworn, too, that she wouldn’t have forgiven herself for making him put his life on hold.
Tamping down a flare of jealousy at the depth of Ben’s love, Emma had comforted her and listened, agreeing emphatically that her sister had, indeed, done the right thing.
Back in the present, Emma capitalized on her sister’s silence and continued. “He’s doing freelance reporting for a few newspapers and writes for a couple of blogs.”
Before Allie could remark or reply, Emma heard the familiar creak of the front door opening. Footsteps pounded toward the kitchen. “Hello?” Caroline called, her voice scratchy. “Where are you?”
“In here.” Emma swiveled her head to look at Allie. “At the table—”
Caroline skidded to a stop, momentarily thrown off balance at seeing her mother. Her dark hair lay in thick, tangled waves around her shoulders. Thick lashes framed her wide, chocolate-brown eyes. Below, her lips were glossed the color of raspberries. Smudges of dirt marked the knees of her jeans, and there was a place just below her elbow beginning to bruise. And she was furious.
Emma squinted at the mark. “What happened?”
“Nothing,” Caroline snapped. “I’m fine.”
“All right. Well, why don’t you come in and say hello?” Emma said, keeping her tone even.
Caroline ignored the polite request. She threw her backpack to the floor, bent over to unzip it, and shuffled through folders and notebooks. After a few tense moments, she yanked out a red piece of paper and waved it around.
Emma reminded herself to act surprised. “What is it?”
“Did someone think this was funny? A joke?” Caroline shook the page, making it rattle.
Emma wrinkled her forehead. “I’m not sure what you’re talking about.” She glanced at Allie, whose skin looked bleached white. “What is that? Where did you find it?”
“It was in my locker,” Caroline said through clenched teeth. “There were more copies, though. In the lunchroom. In the hallways.” Her eyebrows arched, framing her face.
Thrusting out her hand, Emma beckoned her niece to give her the paper.
“It’s an editorial from the newspaper. From, like, ten years ago,” Caroline spat out, and then swiveled and glared at Allie. “You wrote it. You started the whole thing.”
The room vibrated with the accusation.
Emma hoped, in some small way, that Caroline lashing out at Allie would bring her niece some relief. She knew, only too well, that ridding that sort of emotional poison was necessary and cathartic. Once a person betrayed you, they couldn’t be forgiven.
Caroline needed to put up walls, blocking out Allie once and for all. This, what was happening tonight, was the start.
Allie didn’t deserve Caroline. She wasn’t worthy. Emma, after all, had done the work of raising a child, spent the time parenting her, guiding her, and loving her. Emma would take care of her. She always would. She wouldn’t allow Allie to take Caroline away.
Allie didn’t reply, but kept her gaze level. Her eyes said everything, with Caroline stomping around like a wild animal, gnashing her teeth and behaving like a three-year-old.
“Calm down,” Emma said. She grabbed the red paper from Caroline’s hands and skimmed the type.
As if she could tell her aunt was scrutinizing every move, Caroline inched away and stood by the window. When Caroline spoke, her voice was softer. “Do you know . . . Do you realize how many copies they made of this?” She stared at the red paper.
Allie didn’t answer.
“Hundreds! Probably a th-thousand,” Caroline said, looking up at Emma, her words getting caught in her throat. “They were in the basement, in the teachers’ lounge, in the locker rooms.” She swallowed. “I ran out of school. I stayed in the park until everyone went home.”
Emma gave her niece a moment to breathe. Caroline’s eyes were puffy from crying. Caroline trembled, shivering like she’d been locked in a subzero freezer. She shut her eyes and covered her face, pressing her fingertips to her temples.
“Did you have to put it in writing?” Caroline finally murmured. “Because you were going to med school and you were ‘so smart’?” She made quotation marks with her fingers. “That’s why everyone thinks you killed him. You probably did.”
Allie rose out of her seat shakily. “That might be what everyone thinks, Caroline. But that’s not what happened—”
“Let’s not do this now,” Emma said, putting both hands up.
Allie ignored her. As did her niece.
“Then why did you go to jail?” Caroline demanded. “You ruined everything! I hate you. I hate everyone.” She began to sob and sunk down against the wall, knees splayed.
Emma rushed to Caroline, one arm circling her shoulders, her hand stroking her cheek and wiping away tears. As Caroline’s sobs slowed, Emma heard footsteps. She looked up to see her sister standing by the front door. She was leaving. Thank God.
“I am innocent, no matter what anyone says about that night,” Allie said, her voice husky, as if she’d inhaled smoke from a wildfire.
Caroline jerked her head up, wiping her tears on her sleeve. She sucked air in gulps, her chest rising and falling. Emma started to soothe her, patting and rubbing her back, but her niece pulled away. Caroline studied her mother, unblinking. She seemed shocked at first, then perplexed, as if it were necessary to consider the statement.
“I am. I’m innocent,” Allie repeated, standing still, unwavering.
Caroline drew herself up and lifted her chin. “Then prove it.”
TWENTY-SIX
EMMA
2016
Allie left without saying good-bye. The editorial had disappeared along with her. Emma didn’t really care, though it wasn’t going to do her sister any good destroying one copy when a thousand were floating around Brunswick.
Emma didn’t hurry closing up the house, locking the doors, and shutting off lights. She knew that Caroline was still awake. Every so often she heard her moving. She would check on her in a little while, reassure her that everything would be all right. For now, allowing the evening’s drama to settle was best.
It took effort to guide Caroline in the right direction without pushing her too hard. So many decisions. All of the worry. But the sacrifices were necessary. Caroline needed Emma’s protection.
Fortunately, tonight her sister had come to the house willingly; she trusted her, no doubt hoping that Emma would help pave the way for a peaceful, civilized reunion.
And as predicted, Caroline’s bottled-up outrage and anger spewed into the open within seconds of seeing her mother. Caroline channeled all of the blame and hurt she’d stored and hurled it at Allie like a grenade. Ten years of worry and wondering had taken a heavy toll.
Emma placed both hands on the counter, took a deep breath, and glanced at the clock. She needed to talk with Caroline, make sure she was holding up as best as she could.
There was one thing gnawing at the back of Emma’s mind. Caroline, surprisingly, didn’t entirely dismiss Allie. Emma had wanted Caroline to stand up and shout, scream at her mother for being a liar and a fake, and accuse her of awful things.
But she hadn’t.
Somehow, a sliver of doubt about Allie’s guilt had pierced Caroline’s heart.
Prove it.
The words didn’t come with a dose of hatred or disdain. In fact, the opposite seemed true. Had she imagined it, or had Caroline really inched away from her? Nudged her away, moved apart, while she listened to Allie plead for mercy?
Caroline had been surprised, or shocked, and had involuntarily twitched as a response. There could be no other explanation. Emma would have to double her efforts to widen the divide between them. Prove to Caroline what a terrible choice it would be to believe in Allie, even for a moment.
With a soft knock on the bedroom door, Emma peeked inside Caroline’s room.
“I wanted to say good night.”
Emma made out the outline of a shape in the dim light. When her eyes adjusted, she saw Caroline’s face. Anxious, a little terrified, confused. Emma made her way over to the bed and knelt down. “Oh, sweetie. I’m so sorry. I know you’re hurting.”
Caroline shook her head.
“Can I talk to you about it? Just a little?”
Another nod.
“Whoever put up copies of that article—that editorial—was cruel. It was hurtful and deliberate. There’s no reason for anyone to bring up the past. It’s done.” Emma sighed. “Just so you know, I’m going to call the principal and the superintendent and get to the bottom of this mess.”
“All right,” Caroline murmured.
“And since someone shoved this back into our lives, at the very least I can tell you what I know about it, okay?”
Caroline’s shoulders tensed, like she wasn’t sure she wanted to know any more. Finally, she nodded.
“So, one thing you have to understand about Allie is that she has always been very driven. She’s never been shy about sharing her opinion,” Emma said. “It got her into trouble with teachers when she’d try to correct them, and it upset Grandma, because she doesn’t like any type of controversy. But Allie would get an idea into her head sometimes, and she wouldn’t let it go.”
“So what made her write it?”
Emma shifted her eyes. “There was this really talented player, a big guy who wasn’t getting along very well with his teammates.”
Wide-eyed, Caroline tucked the pillow closer.
“So, during one of the games, near the end of the season, this same kid punched the other team’s quarterback—a cheap shot, no question. Really hurt the guy; took him out of the game. The referees gave our guy a penalty, of course. Everyone was talking about it.”
Her niece sat up straight, eager to hear the story. “And then what?”
Emma hesitated. She had Caroline’s full attention, but she had to tread carefully and choose her words wisely. She wouldn’t criticize Allie, not outright. She would be the better sister. The wiser, more caring sister. And from now on, she would make sure to say Allie’s name instead of “your mother.” So Caroline would think of her that way too.
“Somehow, Allie decided it was Coach Thomas’s responsibility. She said the coach needed to watch out for the players better, teach them right from wrong. If they were out of control, he had to stop them.”
“So that’s when she wrote that article for the newspaper?”
“Yes. She did a little investigation work. Talked to some players,” Emma said. “Her boyfriend at the time had a brother who was playing for the team. I think it must have been him she talked to. One week after practice he showed up to school with cracked ribs and bruises.”
Caroline bit her lip. “The article said she saw something happen.”
“I don’t know. Maybe she did. Maybe she didn’t,” Emma said. “It’s her word against his.”
“What do you think?”
Emma ran her hand along her leg, deciding how to answer. “I didn’t agree with what Allie wrote. I didn’t think he would do those things.”
“But if she did see something, that must have made my mom pretty mad.” Caroline frowned.
“Yes, it did. Grandpa Paul and Grandma Lily were really upset at Allie. Everyone was upset. She’d made such poor choices. Embarrassed the family.” Emma lowered her voice. Here was an opportunity to drive home her point. “Allie proved that she wasn’t exactly the golden girl that everyone believed her to be. It broke all of our hearts.” She sat back and looked at her niece, who’d cast her eyes down at the fingers that lay laced in her lap. “About two weeks after that, the coach was murdered and your mom got arrested.”
Caroline rolled over on her stomach, hugged the pillow under her chin. “Did you know him? Coach Thomas?”
“I did.” Emma felt her voice catch. Inside, she was dying, recalling it. She smiled brightly to cover it up. “Everyone liked him. His family owned a pharmacy in town. He was very nice to me. One time when you were sick, he made sure I had the right medicine for you. And he asked about you, remembered your name. I thought he was very caring.”
“Wow. I guess so,” Caroline said, widening her eyes.
Emma reached over and squeezed her hand.
“She did it, though, didn’t she?” Caroline’s voice was muffled.
After a pause, Emma lowered her voice. “I think there’s a lot we don’t know about that night. But when the court was presented with all the facts and witnesses . . . well, they agreed that Allie was guilty.”
When Caroline didn’t respond, Emma stood up and pushed the chair back under the desk. She had made her point about Allie, planting key questions without insisting she had murdered anyone.
“Emma?” Caroline said.
“What is it, honey?” She leaned on the chair and smiled down at her niece.
“Um, something bad happened to Maddie today. Like, really awful.”
Though she
kept her face awash with concern, a shiver of delight coursed through Emma’s body. “What happened?”
Flipping on her side, Caroline hugged her pillow. “There’s a bad picture going around of her. On SnapdIt.”
“What’s SnapdIt?” Emma asked, playing innocent. Caroline, at fifteen, didn’t realize the extent of her aunt’s tech skills. Emma wasn’t simply a web design geek. In her spare time, she honed her knowledge of computer hacking and breaking down cyber security measures.
“A phone app. You share pictures and stuff. Messages,” Caroline said. She ducked her head. “Someone sent out this photo of Maddie. Without . . . without many clothes on.”
Emma forced her jaw to drop open. “Oh no.”
Caroline flushed. “Maddie left school right after someone sent it out. One of the sheriff’s deputies came to the school. I don’t know what else happened.”
“They’ll take it down, sweetheart. They’ll get to the bottom of it.” Emma reached down and patted Caroline’s hand.
“Okay.” Caroline frowned and stared off into space. “I still feel . . . well, really bad for her. She doesn’t deserve it.” Her niece’s eyes filled with tears.
“Even though she’s been so awful to you, you’re still worried about Maddie?” Emma said, raising her brow. “I know you care about her. I know you’d like to still be friends, but if she really posed for a photo like that . . .”
“I know,” Caroline whispered, wiping at her cheeks.
“Just be careful, honey. Sometimes people get what they deserve.” Emma allowed the words to hang in the space between them. She wanted Caroline to think about that. Digest it and remember it.
Her niece winced and frowned.
“Oh. Shoot. And there’s something else,” Emma added, trying to inject an air of nonchalance. “I was going to tell you earlier, but . . .”
“What is it?” Caroline tilted her head back to face Emma.
“Allie got a job,” Emma said. “With the vet who bought Grandpa Paul’s office.”
Caroline sat straight up. “What? Why?”
Sister Dear Page 15
