by Alan Snow
The swell was having a bad effect on the nest boats.
Bert looked from the weird armada to the beach. Against the monster and the huge number of birds, his friends’ preparations looked puny.
“I think they might need my help. Time for a swim!” And with that, he launched himself from the crow’s nest, plunged down into the sea, and started swimming as fast as he could for the beach.
Arthur watched Bert as he flew from the crow’s nest and then swam toward them, and then he turned his attention as the others did to the rapidly approaching monster and nest boats. The monster reached the gap in the reef, and more of the nests broke up in the surf there, but there were still hundreds of them, and even the shipwrecked birds were trailing along behind.
“Stay out of sight and keep quiet!” Marjorie called.
Closer and closer they came. As they reached the shallows, the monster rose higher in the water, and its legs became visible as it paddled its way toward them. Bert was now only yards ahead in the water, and as he reached the sand, Kipper broke the silence and called out to him.
“Bert! Over here, quick!”
“Bert! Over here, quick!”
The wet rat ran up the beach and dived behind Kipper’s sandcastle.
“I don’t know if we are ever going to be able to stop that thing. But I am ready for a fight,” Bert said, panting.
Then the monster stopped. Arthur saw the glint of metal somewhere on the top of the monster’s head. A blade, pushed through from inside, and cutting a flap in the fabric skin. Snatcher’s head appeared through the hole, followed by an arm with a megaphone.
“Morning! I know you’re there, I can sees you from up here. Me and my friends”—at this point he pointed at the mass of floating birds and nest boats that bobbed around him—“ ’ve come to get a few things, and if you keep out of our way, there will be no trouble. We might even spare a few lives. But if you don’t play along, we is going to give you all a very hard time.”
Snatcher’s head appeared, followed by an arm with a megaphone.
Kipper and Tom came out from behind their sandcastles. Both had large spears and swords.
“If you don’t disappear, you will discover you have bitten off more than you can chew,” said Tom bravely.
“That’s not the way to speak to a man in control of a sixty-foot monster and a bunch of vicious bird warriors.”
“What!” Kipper scoffed. “That bunch of turkeys?”
Kipper hadn’t quite realized the effect this insult would have on the wet birds. They were furious. No sooner were the words out than the birds started puffing up their chests, flapping their wings, and squawking very rude squawks. Even the sound of surf was drowned out by the noise. Kipper and Tom ran back behind their defenses.
The combination of the rough journey, Kipper’s insult, and the thought that someone was standing in the way of a bargain that was rightfully theirs, was all too much for the birds. They could hold back no longer.
“ATTACK! ATTACK! ATTACK! ATTACK!”
Snatcher had not intended it to go quite this way, but there was little he could do about it, so he watched as the birds stormed the beach.
The birds leaped ashore and made for the sandcastles where Tom and Kipper were hiding. But as the birds crossed the high water mark, something Tom and Kipper were not expecting happened. The birds disappeared.
Marjorie had designed a trap. This consisted of a disguised trench about five feet deep, covered with palm fronds and sand. As soon as the first of the birds realized that they were dropping into a pit, they panicked, but this had no effect, as the birds behind were so angry that they just charged on. Soon all the birds had disappeared, and the second part of the plan came into action.
The trench trap.
“Nets!” shouted Marjorie.
From the cover of the trees, islanders and pirates ran forward pulling nets to seal the birds in. Once the nets were over the trench, rats appeared from holes in the sand and pegged them down.
There was a cheer from Arthur and his friends.
Snatcher watched in disgust.
“Right, you lot. You leave me with no choice. I am just going to have to flatten you all.” He looked back down inside the head and bellowed. “Start the legs and prepare for lunch!”
The monster moved onto the sand and easily stepped right over the trench. Up the tree Arthur could feel the stomp of each footfall.
The monster moved onto the sand.
“Pull!” shouted Marjorie as she set in motion the next part of their plan.
Several yards back in the forest, ropes were cut and coconut trees that had been bent over with winches were released. As the trees sprang up, they released coconuts, which flew through the air and hit their target. The monster screamed in several places and looked rather punctured . . .
The monster screamed in several places and looked rather punctured.
. . . but still it came on.
Marjorie shouted again. “Operation Lace-Up, GO!”
A very long length of rope had been looped around the beach and hidden under the sand. The ends of the rope were being held by two groups of the burliest pirates who, on the command to go, started to pull in the rope. The rope lifted from the sand and caught around the monster’s legs.
The rope lifted from the sand and caught around the monster’s legs.
The monster wavered slightly as the rope pulled tightly round its legs—but then somehow managed to keep moving shakily forward.
“Keep pulling!”
Seeing that the monster seemed unaffected, the islanders ran to join the pirates at each end of the rope. The rope pulled tighter still, and for a moment the monster stopped.
Inside, Snatcher was screaming at his crew. “If yer don’t make this thing walk again, I will have your guts for garters!”
This seemed to do the trick. The legs strained at the rope and with a loud pop, the rope snapped and the two teams pulling on the ends fell to the ground.
The two teams pulling on the ends fell to the ground.
“What now?” Kipper shouted to Marjorie.
Marjorie looked distraught. “I . . . I . . . don’t know.”
“We have to do something.”
“Yes, but what?”
Arthur felt Fish pull at his sleeve. The boxtroll wanted to tell him something but didn’t have the words. Fish pointed to himself, then Arthur, and then to the ground.
“You want me to come with you?”
Fish nodded and quickly shinned down the tree. When they reached the ground, Fish looked across at the monster and then to one piece of the broken rope. Then he did something Arthur didn’t expect.
Fish ran from the cover of the trees, grabbed the rope, and tied a large loop in it. When he’d done this, he looked up at the monster. The monster’s left foot was about to land only a few feet from the boxtroll.
With enormous courage Fish suddenly threw himself to the ground and rolled right under the foot as it fell. The foot landed . . . but Fish had escaped and was now standing on the other side of it. The loop was now around the monster’s foot, and Fish pulled it tight.
Arthur watched as Fish ran along the beach to the free end of the rope. He picked it up and dived into the waves.
He picked it up and dived into the waves.
As he did, he waved to Arthur to join him. Arthur rushed past the monster and ran into the surf. Fish held the rope high and pointed to the ship.
“I get it! You want us to take the rope out to the ship?”
Fish nodded. Arthur grabbed on to the rope, and they began to swim.
Kipper and Tom saw what was happening.
“We need to cause a distraction!” shouted Kipper.
“Got any ideas?”
But before they could come up with anything, the monster started to bend over and open its mouth. Kipper looked up and saw something horrid.
“Look! It’s got new teeth. Sharp metal ones . . . and they are coming this way.”
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br /> The jaws of the monster started to close. Kipper saw it happening and, quick as a flash, took his thick bamboo spear and forced it between the roof of the monster’s mouth and just behind its lower dentures.
Quick as a flash.
The jaws locked. Tom and Kipper were inside the monster’s mouth and could hear Snatcher shouting.
“Raise up the head and chomp them up a bit!”
They rose, but the chomping wasn’t working.
“What’s going on? Why aren’t you chomping them?”
“The jaws are stuck!”
“Apply more pressure!”
Kipper and Tom saw the spear begin to bend.
“It’s going to give!”
Tom was holding his spear and pushed it into position alongside the first.
The jaws stopped moving again, and there was cursing from somewhere inside the head.
“SONS OF CHEESE-THIEVING VERMIN!!!!”
Kipper smiled to Tom. “He is mad, isn’t he?”
The spears started to bend.
“More pressure!” screamed Snatcher.
Out in the waves Arthur and Fish heard the twang as the drive belt that drove the jaws broke and the monster’s mouth fell open. Kipper and Tom started to fall, but as they did, Kipper grabbed on to the large cloth tongue with one hand and Tom with the other.
Their friends on the beach held their breath.
“Crawl up my arm!” shouted Kipper as they dangled from the monster’s mouth. Tom climbed for all he was worth.
Inside the monster’s brain, Snatcher screamed. “Gristle! Fix those blooming jaws!”
Gristle unbuckled his belt and, as his trousers dropped, managed to tighten it around the cogs that drove the jaws.
Arthur watched, horrified, as the monster’s teeth snapped together and a large bump slid down its throat and swelled its belly. But then a sword poked through the wall of the tummy and split to reveal Tom and Kipper, who then jumped to the sand and ran to join their friends, who were so relieved that they let out a cheer.
A large bump slid down the monster’s throat.
“That was close!”
“You are telling me. I thought we had seen the last of you.”
“You should be so lucky.”
Arthur and Fish clambered aboard the ship, still clutching the rope.
“What are we going to do?”
Fish waved to Arthur to follow him. The boxtroll fed the rope around one of the winches and fixed it.
“You are going to wind him in?”
Fish smiled. They both grabbed the spars of the winch and started to push. Quickly the slack in the rope wound in. Then almost as soon as the rope was tight, a gentle breeze came up from the west and started to push against the ship. This tightened the rope even more and began to pull on the monster’s leg.
They both grabbed the spars of the winch and started to push.
“What’s happening? I didn’t tell you to turn this thing around,” snapped Snatcher to Gristle.
“I ain’t doing nothing!”
“Well, how come we is turning round?”
“I’m not sure. Why don’t you have a look upstairs?” Gristle pointed at the hole in the top of the monster’s head.
Snatcher looked out.
“OH MY GAWD! They got us tied to the ship and is pulling us out.”
“What do you want us to do?”
Snatcher could see that if he resisted the ship and the rope didn’t snap, they would be pulled over.
“Turn out to sea and start walking!”
There was renewed cheering as the monster retreated back into the sea.
“Well done, Arthur and Fish!”
Snatcher was reassessing the situation.
“Okay, then. I get to control the ship, and by the look of it, I might get a couple of hostages out of it this way. Not so bad. I might enjoy a little punishing of hostages!”
He looked down inside the head.
“Right, lads! I think I’ve just sorted things. Make ready for boarding.”
The monster retreated back into the sea.
The Battle of the Beach
Mass Breakout of Cheese Crims Causes Panic!
While police were conducting their sweep of the whole town in the search for the last cheese fiend, the other “Cheese Crims” housed at Ratbridge jail rioted, smashed down the gates, escaped, and are even now causing panic across the town. The mob seems to be moving toward the cheese marshes in an attempt to satisfy their lust.
Lock yourselves in your homes until the mob is quelled!
The monster loomed toward the ship.
chapter 37
UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT
The monster loomed toward the ship, and as it did, Arthur and Fish went from feelings of triumph to fear of what would happen when the monster arrived.
“What are we going to do?” exclaimed Arthur.
Fish looked worried and clueless.
“I don’t think we will be able to defend the ship, so I think we better swim for it! Over the side!”
They both climbed on the rail, jumped, and swam wide of the monster and headed for the beach. As they swam, Arthur looked back and saw Snatcher and his men climbing from the head of the monster and jumping down onto the ship.
“I am not sure that was such a good idea,” he called over to Fish, suddenly realizing that they might have made things even worse.
They both swam wide of the monster and headed for the beach.
Despite this, they were met with cheers as they reached the beach.
“Well done, Fish and Arthur!” called out Willbury. “You’ve saved us!”
“I am not sure that we have really helped. Snatcher has taken control of the ship,” replied Arthur.
“Snatcher has taken control of the ship!”
A solemn silence fell over the beach. As they gazed out across the water, they could just make out the forms of Snatcher and his mob standing on deck, and they seemed to be laughing.
“Now what?” asked Kipper.
Onboard, Snatcher started dishing out orders.
“Strip down the monster and stow it. I think it will be very useful when we get back to Blighty. And Gristle . . . get me some paper and a quill.”
Gristle lowered himself over the stern to the captain’s cabin, then returned back up the rope.
“The smell down there is awful. I think one of the trotting badgers must have food poisoning.”
“Ah yes, the dear trotting badgers. I’ll have to include them in the deal.”
“What deal?”
“Well, we have the ship, and if our friends want to get home, they will have to do exactly what I tell them. This is going to be fun.”
“If our friends want to get home, they will have to do exactly what I tell them.”
For the next hour or so, Snatcher sat writing and rewriting a letter of terms. When it was done, he was looking very pleased with himself and chuckled as he poked the letter into a bottle and pushed in a cork.
“Gristle. Swim ashore and parley with them pests.”
“What, me?”
“Yes, you!”
Gristle could see that there was no way of getting out of it.
“What do you want me to say?”
“Nothing. Just give ’em the bottle and wait for the reply. It is going to be a joy to behold.”
“He poked the letter into a bottle.”
The monster loomed toward the ship.
chapter 38
DEAL OR NO DEAL
“This is outrageous!” Willbury snorted after briefly inspecting the letter Gristle had just handed him.
Gristle didn’t know quite how to react. His boss had the upper hand, but here he was at the mercy of the enemy. He decided it was best to look at what remained of his old boots.
“What does Snatcher say?” asked Tom.
“Quite a lot. And most of it unrepeatable.”
“Is it some kind of deal?”
“For him it is. I’
ll read it out . . . apart from the rude bits at the beginning, and end . . . and a few bits in the middle.”
“Let’s hear it, then,” Marjorie said with a sigh.
“Dear bunch of misfits, failed lawyers, pathetic pirates, filthy rats, and other assorted losers, if you ever wish to see England again, you’ll follow the following instructions to the letter. Please deliver to the ship the following:
“One: Enough food and water for the journey home. It won’t be necessary to provide much for any of you lot who want to come with us, as prisoners will be on quarter rations. Provisions will include at least ten cheeses from the forest and as much fuel as can be gathered and stowed.
“Two: One ton of Black Cabbage seed.”
“What does he want that lot for? It takes less than one seed to poison someone.” Queen Flo was outraged.
Willbury shook his head. “I think there’s no helping the man.”
“Or most of England if he gets hold of that stuff,” added Arthur.
Willbury continued reading.
“Three: Signed statements from everybody wishing to return to England, admitting mutiny.”
“If we agreed to that, we could all end up in prison or transported,” scoffed Bert.
“In prison or transported.”
“I know, but if we’re to get back, we might just have to take our chance. I doubt very much if Snatcher is going to want to have a lot to do with the legal system back home, but it would be a huge risk.” Willbury did not look happy, but went on.
“In addition to the above, agreement to the following:
“Four: That everybody who wishes to travel home will submit to a search, to make sure they are not carrying any Un-Cabbage Flowers or weapons.
“Five: That all prisoners will sign another undertaking not to mention any details of this trip to anyone, and failure to do so will lead to loss of all personal possessions.
“Six: This contract will stand under the statutes of English, International, and Island law.”
