The Summer of Me & You

by Rae Hachton

  “Sorry it took so long,” he said.

  As soon as I was in the car, Kaleb said, “You're actually going somewhere with me. Wow. What happened?”

  “Not sure,” I told him.

  “There's really not much around here to do. I just wanted to spend time with you. You sure you'd rather not be sleeping?”

  “I'm sure,” I told him.

  “She's only doing that to get back at me,” he said.

  “Get back at you?” I stared at Kaleb. “For what?”

  “For not being who she wanted me to be.” His hands tightened on the steering wheel. “I seem to disappoint a lot these days.”

  “Well, if it means anything, I'm glad you're disappointing her.”

  “Before her dad met my mom, we sorta fooled around.”

  “She's older than you. What did she think would happen?”

  He shrugged. “I dunno.”

  Dang, was everyone in love with him?

  I couldn't believe I was in a car with Kaleb Scheffler. Alone with him, in the middle of the night, driving away from our town. The space inside the car was silent and there weren't a lot of other cars on this dark and narrow road that twisted and curved through a maze of trees. Kaleb accelerated, the speedometer passing sixty. But I still felt absolutely safe with him.

  “She's not my girlfriend,” he added. The soft glow of the dashboard lit his face and I observed the play of shadows and light. How it wrapped around his eyes, deepening his expression as he moved his eyes from the road to gaze at me. “Never was.”

  “Rebekah?”

  “No, Ashley.”

  “Do you always drive like this?” I asked him.

  “Sorry,” he said. “I'll slow down. I just drive fast, but I don't want to scare you.”

  “You're not scaring me,” I told him. I wanted to say so much more. You could never scare me. I feel safe with you. The only thing I fear is not having moments like this with you. We should do this more often. I miss you. I want to cuddle with you in the back of your car somewhere and just fall asleep until sunrise.

  “I'm surprised you haven't asked where we're going,” he gave me a grin.

  The truth was it didn't matter where we were going, I just liked the idea of the drive and being alone with him. I pretended I'd forgotten. “You didn't tell me?”

  “No,” he said, “I never said. But you agreed to come anyway.” His grin widened. His eyes swept over me and my skin tingled. It felt as if he'd reached for my hand or touched me. “I'm really glad you came with me tonight. I wanted to talk to you, Kayleigh.”

  I wondered what he had to say.

  “I want to talk to you about things that no one else understands. I want to take you to a place that no one else has ever been.”

  What kind of things? Melancholy things? Dangerous things? And what did he mean by a place that no one else has ever been? Did he mean somewhere he'd never taken his other girlfriends? Was this his way of trying to make me feel special, thinking he'd have a better shot at getting me to do the things he did with other girls?

  “But not tonight. Someday though.”

  Oh, I thought to myself as we arrived at the lake. He parked the car and stepped out, circling around to open my door. Chivalrous. What a surprise. I followed him down the dock and sat down, gazing across the moonlight water. I had no idea why we were here. But it didn't matter. I was with him tonight. He sat right next to me. When I looked at him, that's when I noticed it.

  His eyes were unusual. When Kaleb was happy, the color of his eyes were a lighter brown, the way they were now. This was the first time I'd ever paid attention to them up close. His brown irises were rimmed in yellow, like they'd been carefully outlined with a fine-tipped drawing pen. His pupils were inky black. “You're the only person I can talk to, did you know that?”

  Beneath the smell of his cigarette smoke was a layer of sweet, like fruit. I didn't know what it was, but I loved the scent.

  This was the moment where he and I got closer and maybe...he would kiss me and I would let him. But Kaleb just sighed, and looked away from me, tipping his head back to gaze up at the glowering sky. “I'm glad you and I can be good friends without all of that other bullshit. You're unlike all the other girls I've known.”

  My heart sank. I'd been reading all of this wrong. Kaleb and I were just friends. That's all he wanted to be for me. A friend. Without all of that other bullshit which meant he didn't want to kiss me, he didn't feel that way. A friend, not a girlfriend. Kaleb didn't want the pressure or the commitment or the obligation of birthdays and dates and stupid girly things like Valentine's Day or cuddling. He just wanted someone like me—a brainiac with zero sex appeal who read lots of books—to listen to his brooding, to realize he was deeper than the guy in torn blue jeans that every girl wanted to rip off. He had more about him than a love of sex, partying, drugs and breaking hearts. I mean because the way he held that cigarette was so damn poetic. I wanted his fingers on me, his hands and arms around me. How could I be so stupid to think he had any interest in me that way.

  I know. Because he'd said he liked me. A lot. And now?

  Good friends.

  Oh shit. I wanted to cry. The tears were forming. I needed to stop them before he realized that I was that emotional creature he wanted to avoid. I couldn't let him discover I had feelings for him. Out of control, mad, passionate feelings that could make me just as moody and extreme as he was. Kaleb didn't want that. He wanted someone strong and challenging and if I wanted to win him over I had to be that person.

  I raised my glasses to wipe my eyes, hoping he wouldn't notice and I tried not to sniff like a baby. But I ended up knocking my glasses off into the lake. He noticed and he pulled his gaze away from the sky and reached down into the water, quickly grasping them before they floated away. I had reached for them at the same time and our hands touched. A shock went through me and I pulled away, hiding my face. He shook the excess water from my glasses and dried them on his t-shirt.

  “Kayleigh?” he said. I didn't want to look at him.

  “Yeah?”

  “Turn around. Please? I really want to see your eyes.”

  It felt like I couldn't breathe. Oh Kaleb, you sexy bastard. Please shut up. Stop saying things to me like that. I want you so badly. You don't need to see my eyes, not when you have the moon and the lake and the stars.

  He couldn't see my eyes or he'd know how sad I was. “I can't see anything,” I tried to keep my voice steady, keep it from shaking. “It's too dark. Hand me my glasses please?”

  He handed them to me and I placed them back on my face.

  “You're being silent,” he said. “Too silent.”

  “I'm just listening to you, Kaleb.”

  “Yeah—but I want to hear you talk. You always have so many interesting things to say.” When I didn't say anything or look at him, he knew something was wrong. I was just gazing down into the lake, swinging my legs back and forth. I was so absorbed in my thoughts about him that I hadn't realized he'd scooted closer. Not until his fingers swept my hair away from my face, and his hand gently cupped my chin, turning my face in his direction. I didn't resist. Our eyes met again and I knew he could see it.

  “Are you sad?” he asked. “Your eyes are a little bit watery. What's wrong?”

  As if he didn't know...

  “I'm fine,” I lied and he knew it. “It's just the lake. I've been staring into it for too long.”

  “Yeah,” he said. “And you're not looking at me.”

  Didn't know you needed me to.

  “Keep your eyes on me, Kayleigh.”

  I wanted to tell him that's where they've been the whole time. I wanted to just take the initiative and kiss him myself. Maybe he didn't think I was interested because guys like him didn't notice girls like me—girls who seemed more interested in books than they were boys. But he had noticed me. He did tell me he liked me. He even asked if I liked him. My answer?—Possibly. Which meant, not yet, but maybe. Perhaps he was tryin
g to respect that. I didn't know.

  Kaleb was nicer than I thought he'd be. But I had to remind myself that no matter what he said tonight, it could all be different by morning. He had mood swings. Being alone with me like this might've been his way of feeling adventurous since he'd already done everything else. Maybe I was a challenge for him. Something he wanted to try so he could add it to his list. The thought of that made me mad. Feelings of foolishness and hurt immediately bubbled to the surface, swallowing and drowning away how he'd just made me feel.

  “Why?” I asked, a little more fiercely than I'd intended.

  He ran his thumb over my bottom lip, deliberately. “Because,” he said. Kaleb knew exactly what he was doing. The gaze in his eyes pierced deep, causing me to become afraid of the intimacy that passed between us. I broke the connection, dropping my gaze from his eyes to his neck. He swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing once, then he dropped his hand from my chin and stretched out beside me, sighing, one hand spread out over his chest, the other ruffling through his hair.

  If I stayed here like this with him any longer I knew I'd end up making a fool of myself. I checked my watch. “It's nearly 3 a.m. Kaleb,” I said.

  His head turned as he peered up at me. “You have anywhere else to be?”

  “Asleep,” I said, laughing.

  He yawned. “I'm already tired, Kayleigh.”

  “Too tired to drive us back?”

  He nodded his head. “Mhm.” He blinked. I could hear his voice becoming sleepy. It was the sexiest sound ever.

  “I can drive us back,” I offered.

  “You will?”

  “Yeah,” I said, standing. “Let's go.”

  He sprawled out in the backseat. I had the stereo on low, playing a song that I listened to a lot, but now I knew that whenever I heard it after tonight, I would think of Kaleb. I began softly singing along.

  I thought he'd fallen asleep, but I knew he hadn't when I felt his fingers run through my hair as softly as a summer's breeze. It was a half hour drive back. He'd sat up and I hadn't realized. I'd been daydreaming. Unexpectedly, he crawled from the back of the car to the front, settling down into the passenger's seat. He leaned his head back against the headrest, closing his eyes. “I love this song.”

  “Me too,” I glanced at him.

  “I'm starving,” he told me. “When we get back we should eat breakfast together.”

  “Where would you like to go?”

  “No,” he said. “I mean, at home. My house. I'll cook for you.”

  Oh really?

  “Thought you were tired.”

  “Nah. Not anymore.”

  Early morning, we arrived back at Kaleb's house. It was just before the blue hour and there was just enough darkness outside to let us know that night was ending and day beginning. Everything around us was silent, all except for the stirring and chirping birds.

  We crept into Kaleb's house. His mom was still asleep. Stephen, Rebekah, Alison, and Stephen weren't there. Kaleb yawned again.

  “You don't have to cook breakfast for me,” I told him.

  “Are you kidding? I'd love to,” he said.

  “Yeah, but I'm really not that hungry and I can tell that you're extremely tired. Rain check? You can do it at another time.”

  “You sure? Because I can totally whip you up something to eat.”

  “I'm sure,” I told him, hovering near the door. Kaleb had already made his way into the kitchen. He pulled open the refrigerator door and grabbed the orange juice.

  “I'll see you tomorrow,” I pivoted around, my hand on the door knob ready to leave. I had just opened it an inch when the refrigerator door crashed shut and he bolted across the living room, pressing his hand against the door, closing it again. He leaned against the door.

  “Where are you going, Kayleigh?” His eyes met mine.

  “Home,” I told him.

  “How? I mean—”

  “I'll walk,” I said.

  “No way. Not letting you do that. It's dangerous. You're going to stay here with me.”

  Now that was dangerous.

  “I'm not going to make you sleep on the couch again just so I can have your bed.”

  “Okay,” he said. “Then we'll both sleep in my bed together. It's big enough for two.” His expression was casual, until he saw my hesitation. I was making it into a bigger deal than it should be. I mean, it was a big deal. For me. But he was totally better at playing it cool than I was.

  He gave me his award winning grin. “Kayleigh, there's nothing to be afraid of. I promise there aren't any monsters under my bed.” He leaned up off the door, giving me back my breathing room. “Besides, it's nearly daylight.”

  Whoa. Was I really going to lay next to Kaleb Scheffler? In his bed? Were we really going to be that close?

  “I trust you with the car. I would let you drive yourself home and bring the car back later on today, but that would be irresponsible of me knowing I kept you out all night. It'd be unsafe and I don't want you getting in an accident.”

  He was super convincing. Almost as if he'd planned it. But there were zero complaints. Standing there I even let out a yawn. And he smiled. “C'mon,” he said, sauntering off to his room.

  My mom was just getting off her nursing shift. If she found out I wasn't home, she was going to ground me. Big time.

  She already had. Punishment would be far worse. She'd probably even kill me if she found out I'd stayed out all night with Kaleb, then fell asleep with him in his bed. Oh God. But it was totally worth it.

  She'd never know.

  I pulled my cellphone out of my pocket, looking to see if she'd left me any messages. None.

  But I'm sure she'd be blowing my phone up within the next few hours, so I silenced it. Like I told you, Kaleb could coerce me into almost anything.

  I followed behind him as he twisted the knob to his bedroom, opening the door. His room was extremely tidy, unlike the first time I saw it. Almost like he'd spent a lot of time cleaning it. His bed was even made. No wrinkles in the covers. Wow.

  He bent down, untying his shoes. I placed my phone back in my pocket and slipped out of my sandals.

  “I'm going to quit smoking,” he said, randomly. “It's a bad habit.”

  “Okay.” I watched him as he removed his shoes. “I like cherry bubble gum,” I told him.

  He glanced up at me. “What?” He laughed, realizing it related to nothing.

  “I thought we were telling each other random things.”

  “Are we?”

  “We are,” I mirrored.

  As he walked to the nightstand, he dug into his pocket and pulled out his blue lighter. He opened a drawer and pulled out a plastic bag.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Lighting a fizzy pop incense,” he informed me. “I love the smell.” He reached in and pulled one out. “Here,” he said, passing one in my direction. “Smell it.”

  I took the fragrance stick from him, raising it beneath my nose. It smelled ah-mazing. Like fairies with magic dust or bathing in a blue soda fountain underneath the stars. Sugary sweet. So that was the mysterious scent beneath the smoke smell on Kaleb.

  I noticed he could be neat when he wanted to be. The only thing in Kaleb's room that was “out of place” this morning was the fact he'd left a half eaten bag of Buffalo flavored Dorito's and a canister of Mountain Dew on his nightstand. I handed the fizzy-pop back to him and he lit it, placing it on the incense holder. I reached down and scooped the bag of chips from the nightstand, digging my hand in. He gazed up at me, curiously.

  “What?” I said. “They're my fave.” I bit in to one, tasting the burst of flavor. I chewed and swallowed. “Breakfast,” I said.

  “Yum,” he laughed.

  “Definitely. Never happens at my house. My mom makes me these health food smoothie drinks with vitamins,” I told him. “Absolutely no junk food whatsoever.”

  “Damn,” he said. “I couldn't live there. No freaking way.”

 
; “Me either,” I said, biting into another chip. “I mean, I barely can.” I chewed. It tasted so good. I didn't even care that Kaleb was watching me. “I could like totally devour an entire bag of these.”

  He laughed again. Then I realized I was probably looking like a pig. In front of him. “Oh my God,” I said, dropping the bag back down on the nightstand.

  “No—” he shook his head. “Don't even turn into one of those girls. Finish the rest of them if you want. Even if it does make your breath stink.”

  “I'm good.” I plopped down on his bed, laying back. It would've been more awkward for me if he'd laid down first.

  He jerked his black curtains across the window, blocking out the daylight, then switched on the fan. “I have to sleep with this thing on. I like the cool air, and the hum. Helps me fall asleep.”

  I gazed at him. “Me too.”

  I watched as he dragged his red beanbag chair beside the bed, right under the fan and plopped down. He reached up onto the bed and pulled down the extra pillow.

  “What are you doing?”

  He stuffed it under his head, extended his legs out, settling in, then laid back, closing his eyes. “I'm a few minutes away from sleeping.”

  “Oh,” I said, under the impression he was going to sleep up here on his bed with me.

  He twisted his head and opened one eye sneakily to look at me. I bet he wanted to gauge my reaction, but I was already looking at him. He smiled. “Sweet dreams,” he said.

  “Sweet dreams.” I rolled over on my side to face the wall. If I'd been any other girl, I bet Kaleb would've crawled up here with intentions of doing anything but sleeping, but since I was Kayleigh he was going to give into his zzzz's.

  The room was silent for minutes. I had almost drifted off into sleep when I heard his voice again.

  “Kayleigh?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Aren't you going to take off your glasses?”

  ***

  I'm not sure what pulled me out of sleep—I think I smelled cigarette smoke—but I woke up in an unfamiliar place. As my consciousness settled back in, I realized I was in Kaleb's bed, and not my own. That I'd slept in his room with him and hadn't gone home last night.