He heard the squeak of wood near him and figured Chloe was probably settling into the Papasan chair.
“You want the couch?” he asked.
“Nope. I’m excellent right here,” she said. “Besides, you need the comfiest spot if you’re going to do some nodding off.”
“Right.” Graham lay silent for a while, but his eyes weren’t even heavy, so he just stared at the darkened ceiling. It figured, his insomnia would kick in right when he really needed to sleep. Then again, it wasn’t even ten yet, and he rarely went to bed this early. “This isn’t going to work,” he said. “I’m not remotely tired. Maybe I should get up and be active or something so I can wear myself out.”
“You think that would work?” Chloe’s voice sounded doubtful.
“I don’t know.”
“Well, I’m always more amped up right after a workout. I think you should stay put. How about we put on a boring movie?”
He shook his head. “I can’t sleep with the TV on.”
“Okay.”
They were silent for a while.
He sighed aloud. “Can we at least talk so I don’t die of boredom?”
“Sure.” He thought he heard the smile in her reply. “Whatcha wanna talk about?”
What did he want to talk to Chloe about? Not his embarrassing display at the fashion show. Not his mildly disturbing connection with Violet. And not his family issues. Then he had a thought. “Let’s talk about why Chloe Schuyler won’t trust a single guy in the entire universe enough to date him.”
“I didn’t say that,” she said.
“But it’s true.”
She groaned. “Graham, just give it up.”
“I won’t,” he said. “I learned a little about being stubborn from my mom, and I can hold on longer than you.”
“I doubt that.”
“You’ve never met a guy like me.” A flush of warmth rose up his neck after he said it, when he realized the comment could be taken as something of a challenge.
“Doesn’t matter,” Chloe said.
“Why won’t Chloe go on a date?” Graham said aloud as if he were musing to himself. “What’s she so afraid of? Is this fair maiden threatened by the intimidating, more powerful gender?”
She gave a loud snort. “Right. That’s it.”
“That a suitor might come and trample on her ever-so-delicate temperament?”
“Lame ass,” she muttered.
Graham smiled to himself. “Or perhaps the lovely maiden is too high to come down off her throne for the likes of a mere mortal. None dare look upon her majestic radiance. It would take nothing less than a demi-god to woo her, with the divine beauty she possesses. In fact, her beauty is so regal that all mankind can only hope to bask in the glow of her—”
“Shut the hell up, Graham.” Chloe’s biting tone startled him.
He blinked. “What? What did I say?”
“Just stop.”
“I was just talking about how beautiful—”
“I said shut up.”
Graham sat up and reached for the table lamp. When he flicked it on, he saw her sitting in the Papasan chair with arms crossed. Her lips wore a silent scowl.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, suddenly concerned. He’d seen her banter back and forth easily. Her sudden coldness didn’t make any sense.
“I don’t appreciate being mocked.”
“I— I was just teasing,” he said.
“You were acting like a jerk.”
“What?” He stared at her, at a complete loss for words. Still, she refused to make eye contact. “I was just remarking on how pretty you were—”
She turned her cold eyes on him then. “Don’t.”
Then he stopped, considering something new. “Wait. Is this a feminine thing? You think I was being chauvinistic? That I care about your looks more than your intelligence? Because that’s not tru—”
“No. That’s not it,” she said.
“Then what? Why did me calling you beautiful—”
Something behind her eyes flamed up at the word.
Graham frowned. “You don’t like me calling you beau—”
“Will you stop saying that?” Her voice was edged with the dry crispness of her frustration.
Graham bit his lip, thinking. She hadn’t reacted like this earlier tonight when he’d told her she looked nice or complemented her hair. What was different here? “What’s the matter with compliments?”
“It’s crap, and you know it.”
“It’s absolutely not crap that you’re incredibly b—” Graham stopped himself this time. “Wait a minute. You don’t believe it, do you?”
She didn’t answer, and she continued to avoid his gaze.
His jaw dropped. “Has no one ever told you that?”
“Sure they have. Plenty. That’s what guys do. They like to mess with you.”
Graham regretted his earlier playful teasing. “Chloe. I swear I’m not messing with you. I just wanted to figure you out.”
She turned angry eyes on him. “Why?”
“I don’t know. I guess because I…sorta…” he swallowed, “…like you.” He tried to give a nonchalant shrug. “You’re pretty cool, and I want to be friends.” He wanted more than that.
Her eyes softened a little, but she still looked suspicious.
“It’s me, Chloe. Not some random jerk. And I’m not really into extraneous flattery. Can’t you…don’t you feel like you can trust me?”
She measured him for several long moments, and her expression morphed. So many emotions flickered across her face that, for a moment, he wished he had Jade’s ability.
The wall she kept around her wasn’t obvious at first glance, but it still kept her away from him. “I wish you weren’t so closed off,” he said softly. “Won’t you tell me why?”
Chloe shook her head, but he didn’t think it was in denial. When she spoke, it was barely audible. “Some things are too personal.”
He watched her, hoping if he held out that she’d relent.
“It’s…embarrassing,” she finally said.
“I’m pretty familiar with embarrassing. I used to get made fun of at school because I didn’t know who my dad was. They called him Ghost Dad and thought it was funny to run away from me pretending to be scared. Then, at fifteen, I finally discover who he is, which ends up severing all ties with the girl who is one of my closest friends. To make things worse, I have to get over this crush I have on her, because, well, she’s my half-sister, and that makes everything fifty levels of creepy. Top all that off with—four years later—getting recurring strange dreams about her. And finding out our…glitches…whatever…are somehow connected. Now it’s five hundred levels of creepy.” He shook his head. He still couldn’t mention the dreams without his face getting hot.
Chloe was listening, and her eyes hadn’t left him the whole time. “I had braces in high school,” she said. “And really bad acne.”
“When I was thirteen, I had the worst haircut of my life,” Graham said. “It was practically an afro.”
“I was a complete dork,” she said.
“My dream was to be on the school paper,” Graham said. “You can guess how far below ‘cool’ that put me.”
It felt like a competition for who’d had the worst childhood, but Graham’s admissions seemed to give her strength. She blew out a charged breath. “There was this guy. His name was Andrew. I had a huge thing for him. One of his friends gave me his number, and we texted back and forth for a while. He would write the sweetest things. Anyway, for a whole year it went on, this silent back and forth between us. We never talked on the phone or anything. His friends would come up to me sometimes and tell me how much he liked me.”
“But he never talked to you?”
“He was too shy—that’s what they all said, anyway. It’s what he told me in his texts.”
“Like Cyrano,” Graham mumbled.
“Who?” Chloe said.
“Ever heard of the playwright Edmond Rostan
d? Never mind. Continue.”
“Well, I thought about making the first move, but I hated talking to people in person because of my braces. I could catch his eye from across the cafeteria and smile at him with my lips closed. But face to face made me nervous.”
Graham nodded. “Ah, yeah. Good ol’ high school drama.”
“But toward the end of freshman year, we finally decided we would meet: after school, outside near the football field. I was so nervous. I wore my favorite outfit—which wasn’t saying much, considering my lack of style back then. Still, I was going to really try. I made up my mind to forget about my braces when we were together and not be afraid to talk to him.” She took a deep breath. “So I did it. After school, I walked out to the football field. He was standing near the bleachers waiting for me. I walked up and started to say hello when I noticed the funny look on his face—sort of like he was stifling a smirk. Like he’d heard some joke, but he was trying not to laugh. And before I could figure out what it was about or do anything, all these guys ran out from hiding and sprayed me with Silly String. It was his friends, and they must have recruited help because pretty much the whole football team was in on the prank. All of them were jeering and laughing at me, and it was like the stupid silly string never ran out. When it finally ended, half the school was watching, and Andrew was shaking his fists in triumph. He’d just pulled off a year-long prank, and I could tell he was buzzed with the high of it.”
“So he hadn’t meant what he’d said in the texts?”
“It had all been a lie. Just one huge joke, and all his friends had been in on it.”
“Wow,” Graham said. “What a jerk.”
Chloe nodded. “I was crushed. When I came back to school the following year, I was determined to be different. I read fashion blogs all summer, had a makeover, and learned all about hair products. I couldn’t get rid of the braces yet, but I was determined not to look like a loser anymore.”
“So you never talked to another guy after that?”
“Oh sure, I talked to them. I learned how to flirt, and once the braces came off, I gained a lot more confidence.”
“You just wouldn’t date any of them,” Graham said.
“Hell no,” Chloe said. “I knew that if a freshman guy could keep up an act like that for an entire year, there was no way I’d ever know who was for real and who wasn’t. I could just imagine all the guys in high school waiting to pounce on what was left of my pride.” She scowled. “Imagine how much more funny it would be to fool the geeky girl the second time. So I never gave them the chance.”
Graham studied her. “I can see the logic in that. I can also imagine the decent guys wishing you would give them a chance to get to know you.”
She snorted. “Decent high school boys? Oxymoron much?”
Graham frowned. “Just because a few guys are jerks doesn’t mean they all are.”
“It was the entire football team,” she said.
“Still. I bet there were at least a few nice guys who could only watch you from afar and wish they had a shot with you.”
Chloe rolled her eyes.
“So now, five years later, you refuse to give any guy a chance, no matter what he’s like on the inside?”
“It’s not just that,” she said.
“Okay, then what?” Graham asked.
She sighed as if frustrated by his lack of understanding. “My parents just celebrated their twenty-eighth year of marriage.”
“Wow, that’s harsh,” Graham said, trying not to smile.
“Shut up and listen,” Chloe said. “They have a perfect marriage. I mean, it’s beyond ideal. My dad still brings her flowers for no reason. They have a date night every weekend. They even cook dinner together.”
“That’s really sweet,” Graham said.
“It’s not just sweet,” Chloe said. “It’s impossible to recreate. If I didn’t see how they act with my own eyes, I wouldn’t believe it. They are so in love still, after twenty-eight years! That kind of stuff doesn’t happen anymore.”
“Maybe not often,” Graham said. “But that doesn’t mean it’s not possible.”
Chloe shook her head. “No way. Even if it was possible, I wouldn’t be able to do it.”
“You don’t want to be monogamous?” Graham asked.
“That’s not what I’m saying. Of course I do. I’d kill for that kind of relationship. But I’m nothing like my mom. She’s so sweet and gentle and kind. Next to her, I’m stubborn and hot-headed and prone to jealousy. I’m pretty sure I’m incapable of anything that’s remotely like their marriage.”
Graham thought about her reasoning and how her protective walls were beginning to make sense. He had his own ideas about relationships. His mother had never modeled one, yet he was confident he could have a successful marriage when he was ready. Maybe it was because he’d grown up fatherless with an overloaded working mother that he felt so strongly about getting it right in his own life. The truth was, when he saw her life, he thought he could do better. And not that Bruce was a terrible father, despite the affair, but Graham thought he could do better than that, too. He would do better, no matter what.
“Maybe you can’t, and maybe you can,” he said. “Who knows how any of us will do in this game. But not even giving it a chance—that’s failing before you even try.”
“It’s not failing—” Chloe began.
“Isn’t it? Are you really happy, Chloe? Is this what you want—to be alone for the rest of your life?”
“I—” She faltered, and her gaze dropped.
“Is it so great to be alone?”
She didn’t answer, and Graham could feel that stubborn streak keeping her from agreeing aloud.
He smiled. “You’re right about one thing. You are stubborn.”
She gave him a dirty look and shot up from her chair like she was going to tell him off. Graham rose to meet her, and they stood eye-to-eye.
“But have you ever considered that your personality might be a strength?” he said.
“What do you mean?” she asked, folding her arms.
“I mean, that a stubborn streak could work for a relationship, too. That kind of tenacity could keep a marriage together, even when things are difficult.”
“Maybe,” she said.
“Anyway, you don’t have to think about all that yet, do you? Getting married…your future…any of those long-term things. That’s way off, so why not just take it one step at a time?” Graham stepped closer until her arms nearly brushed his chest.
Her eyes were glued to his, but she didn’t speak.
“Your parents are happy,” Graham said. “But mine aren’t. After the thing with my dad, my mom refused to date anyone. It’s like she thinks keeping busy will distract her, but I see her every day, and she’s miserable. I don’t want to be like that.”
“Me neither,” Chloe said. “But if I don’t find the right person, why bother?”
“How can you even know if it’s the right person if you don’t give him a chance?” Graham’s face felt flushed, and his heart raced. He brushed his fingertips against her arm. When she didn’t flinch, he didn’t pull them away.
Chloe’s eyes squinted in puzzlement. When she spoke, her voice was barely above a whisper. “Why do you care so much about my personal life?”
He bit his lip. “Because I want to be in it.”
She examined his face for a moment, studying what, he wasn’t sure. Her crossed arms loosened, and she lifted them onto his shoulders. The motion brought her an inch closer, and Graham, unsure where to put his hands, let them trail down her arms and land around her waist.
“Okay,” she said, as soft as a whisper. Her breath caressed his chin.
Graham was caught in her eyes, in that first truly unguarded expression he’d seen on her. It was as if she was purposefully letting him peer beyond her barrier. He couldn’t breathe, and he didn’t dare move.
Chloe tipped her head toward him, and Graham was unable to look away from he
r mouth.
Just then, the bathroom door opened. In a flash, Chloe tugged away from him. She planted herself down on the chair and adopted a casual expression.
Stunned, Graham could do nothing but blink at Jade as she emerged from the bathroom, dressed in a t-shirt and shorts. Her long hair lay wet against her shoulders.
“What’s up?” she asked, rubbing at her hair with a towel. “Can’t sleep?”
Realizing he was standing in the middle of her living room, Graham grasped for an explanation. “I…uh…just needed something to drink.”
“Oh.” Jade nodded toward the kitchen. “Help yourself to anything.” She yawned. “I’m going to bed. Wake me if you come up with anything on Violet?”
Graham nodded. “I will. ’Night.”
Chloe, who’d found a book to leaf through, looked up to give Jade a wave. “Sweet dreams.”
When Jade had shut the door to her room, Graham turned to face Chloe. There was no way she could be as riveted by that book as she acted.
He let out a breath. “Did you tell me you would go out with me, or did I imagine that?”
She arched an eyebrow and peered over her book at him, giving him a little, crooked grin.
He cocked his head. “Chloe?”
Jade’s appearance seemed to have changed Chloe back to her old self, minus one thing. She surveyed him before she answered. “One date. We’ll see how it goes after that.”
The enchanter wakes to a darkened sky with starry pinpricks of illumination dotting the black ceiling above her. The piercing ache in her skull has interrupted her slumber, but Logan is still asleep on the mattress next to her.
She rises, and the surface beneath her bounces, the displacement of air jostling his sleeping form, but not enough to wake him. Leaning for her suitcase, she tumbles off the makeshift bed. Her knees scrape the hard concrete, and she curses aloud, but that pain is nothing next to the volcano pounding inside her head, threatening to send her spiraling into an eruption of agony.
A hand finds the bag, wrestles with the zipper, and is granted entry. With some prodding, she finds one of the sacred bottles of pills. She chokes down a handful of them and takes a deep breath. Then another inhale, waiting for the pain to ebb. Like always, it finally does, and the relief that comes is so sweet it washes away her tiredness.
Enchanter: The Flawed Series Book Four Page 26
