by Opal Mellon
“Wow,” Justin said, coming up to Molly and standing beside her. “Quality people.”
Molly brought a finger up to her mouth and started to bite the nail. Justin caught her hand and held it gently. “Don’t do that. You’ll hurt yourself.”
Molly frowned and looked down at the red, angry nail. He was right. She rewarded him with a small smile and put her hands together in front of her. She looked up to see Sean approaching. He was an intimidating person, and even though Molly inherently trusted someone who had picked Nicole, she was a little wary around him. He was surly and seemed to command a natural distance from others. She guessed he didn’t get his butt pinched like Justin did.
She was still embarrassed by her outburst. She hadn’t planned on making a scene. But she knew what it was like to be touched when you didn’t want to be, so she knew that someone needed to speak up. She also felt that Cynthia had no right. Justin was her date. The possessiveness welling up in her felt wrong and overwhelming.
Quite a few faces were turned their way, some with cell phones out that were doubtless recording the drama.
“My guess is a lot of people have been wanting to do what you did for a long time,” Justin said. “Looks like you’re going to have some new fans.”
“She was acting like a bum,” Molly said. “And grabbing yours.”
“Yeah,” Justin said. “I guess she was.” He dragged a hand through his hair. “Want to go out for some air?”
“Yes.” Molly touched Nicole, who was eagerly updating Sean. “We’re going outside for a moment. Enjoy flaunting your man.”
Nicole gave Molly a quick hug. “All right, be safe out there. Call if you need me to come to you.”
“I’m not a baby.”
Molly followed Justin out. When they exited the room, the air was a few degrees cooler and a few degrees fresher. They both took a deep breath, and held it. Then it became a silent competition to hold it the longest, and Justin won, mostly due to sheer lung size. He laughed at Molly’s defeated sigh and started towards the doors leading to the outside.
Molly stopped him and pointed to a bench just inside the lobby that still had a good view out the side doors.
“Can we sit there? I’m sun sensitive.”
“Really?” he said, eyeing her pale skin. “I’d never have guessed.” She squinted at him and he laughed, shaking his head. “I was being sarcastic. Lowest form of humor. So shoot me.”
“No,” she said. “I don’t think I will.”
He dropped his head in his hands. “You’re really something.” He sat back up and leaned against the wall. He pulled one leg up and rested the ankle on his knee, creating a table with his leg.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re just one of a kind. Really unique. Not like any other girl I’ve met.”
“Oh,” she said, looking a bit deflated.
“That’s a good thing,” he said.
“You’ve met Nicole.”
“She’s the exception,” he said, and looked outside. The day was beautiful. Typical sunny, cool day. Trees leaning slightly with shimmering, rustling leaves that danced in the wind and the sunlight. “I was shocked when you hit that girl.”
“Why?” she said.
“Because you hit someone,” he said. “Not something I see every day. Why did you do it?”
“I don’t know,” she said. “I haven’t done that before.”
“Was it because she grabbed my butt?” He smirked. “Or because she made your life heck growing up? Man, I can see why you’re so odd, if you had to put up with that for longer than five minutes,” he said.
“Much longer,” Molly said. “But I think she’s worse now. I think I mainly did it because those girls are part of the reason I was so isolated that I was almost molested. And even if I’d forgiven them for that, seeing them do to you what was done to me was too painful to ignore.”
“So you do remember?” Justin said, glaring at her for a moment.
She blushed, a red blotch moving all the way up her neck to the bottom of her cheeks, leaving white splotches on her cheekbones. She looked away quickly, nodding.
“I knew it!” Justin said, jumping up off the bench and punching the air, drawing a few confused looks from onlookers. He didn’t notice as he sat back down and rubbed the tops of his knees and grinned. “Silly Molly.”
She shrugged and didn’t turn to face him.
“Molly?” he said. “Look at me Molly.” When she didn’t, he reached over and put a finger under her chin to try and turn her towards him.
“Stop it,” she said. “I don’t want to look at you. I’m not ready to face you yet.” She stood. “Please don’t follow me,” she said. She turned and walked with her arms folded towards the hallway with the bathrooms.
Molly headed down the hall, only looking up from the teal and purple carpet more suited to the 80’s long enough to see that she was still headed in the general direction of the bathroom. She didn’t look to the side of it, just saw that it said restroom, and went in. She kept her head down, hoping not to see any familiar women there, and headed into a stall. She sat down on the toilet and thought for a moment. It was sad that there really wasn’t anywhere that you could escape people other than a bathroom. That had been her frequent destination at lunchtime during school.
She’d hide in the stall and think of how grateful she was to not be a monster like Cynthia and her girls, because she was pretty sure that, as much as it hurt, she’d rather be on the receiving end of that pain than the giving end. She’d known that she would grow up and get away and be able to choose who she was around, but Cynthia would have a hard time going anywhere with that personality.
She heard someone enter the bathroom stall next to her. She looked up at the stall wall to see quite a few obscenities. This bathroom was dirtier than she was used to. Then she heard someone speak up from the next stall.
“Could you hand over some toilet paper? There’s none in this stall.”
Molly blanched. It was a man’s voice. She’d gone into the wrong bathroom. She unrolled some and tried to throw it over the top. She tried to pull her feet up so they weren’t visible under the stall. But then how would she get up so that she could leave?
She decided to risk it. She planted her feet, quickly unlocked the door, and headed out, only to see a man rinsing his hands at the sink. Trying to look normal, she decided to wash her hands as well, not realizing how bad this looked in a men’s bathroom with urinals around.
“Whoa!” the guy said, jumping back from the sink. “Wrong bathroom!”
“I’m sorry,” she said, holding up her hands. “I didn’t look before I came in.” She pulled her hands dripping wet from the sink and headed towards the door backwards.
“Ha ha,” the guy said, pulling a paper towel down from the roller and handing it to her before drying his own. “Molly Harper, isn’t it? Gosh I love what you did to Cynthia.”
Justin froze from where he sat in the stall. He’d followed her in and had hoped to just alert Molly to the fact that she’d gone into the wrong restroom. But now she was talking to someone who actually had the balls to talk to a woman in the men’s bathroom and there was nothing he could do without embarrassing her and showing himself. He knew she’d be upset to know he followed her, and humiliated to know that he knew she’d messed up like that. He’d have hated it if he were in her position. Then again, they were very different in how much they cared about what other people thought. Maybe he shouldn’t assume that she felt the same as he did. Maybe he could just go out there and —
“Like I said, really ballsy,” the guy said. Justin could hear his feet moving, could hear Molly’s heels tapping. She seemed to be heading for the door. He seemed to be as well. “Also going in the men’s restroom. Kind of kinky.”
He heard a snort. “Hardly. It was a mistake.” He heard the heels move and the shoes move. The door opened and closed.
“Please move,” she said.
“No,�
�� he said. “I can’t believe I’m here with Molly Harper, alone in the restroom. You look great you know.”
“And you smell drunk, Chad.”
That’s it, Justin thought. Feelings or not, I’m going out there.
“I’m not,” Chad said. “If you’d have looked like this when you asked me to prom, I wouldn’t have said no.”
“Oh. Great,” Molly said.
Chad said something back, and Justin heard shoes scuff the ground. Molly squeaked.
Time’s up. Justin pushed out of the stall and saw Molly against the wall, Chad bent over her. Justin got there in a second, pulled Chad off, and realized Chad was bent over in pain, holding his groin.
“So you followed me?” Molly said.
Justin let Chad sink to the ground, slightly disappointed that he had no excuse to teach him a further lesson. “You’re the one in a men’s bathroom.
“I came in on accident. Why’d you follow me?”
“I guess I was worried.” He shook his head. “Look, we should probably continue this outside the bathroom.”
Justin followed Molly back to the front lobby, dreading the conversation that was probably coming.
“Thanks for trying to help,” she said.
“Looks like you didn’t need it.” He pulled his leg back up and picked at his sock.
“I still appreciate it. You always did know how to show up at the right moment.”
He watched her for a moment. Was she actually complimenting him? That was something she hadn’t really ever done even when they were friends before.
“Yeah. You never did get to thank me properly for that.”
“Well, you didn’t give me a chance. You disappeared.”
She was right. He’d run and he had no way to explain. Outside, the sun was shining and the wind was dying down.
“You’re probably right,” he said. “I don’t really have a good explanation. Not one I can give you. Not now.”
“What did happen that night, Justin? Why did you disappear?”
He wasn’t ready to tell her. Not ready for her pity, or for her to think him disgusting.
“I’ll tell you sometime,” he said. “I promise. Just not now.”
“Why didn’t you try to tell me? Why didn’t you send any word?” She wrung her hands slightly. “I may not have meant much to you, but you were my best friend. I missed you. I thought I’d done something wrong.”
“No no,” Justin said. “You didn’t do anything. I couldn’t contact anyone. I just can’t tell you why yet, but I promise it’ll make sense someday.”
“Someday soon?” Her blue eyes sparkled at him.
“Someday soon.” He gave her knee a quick pat then moved his hand away. They both sat and watched the trees until Sean and Nicole came out to meet them.
Chapter 3
Molly was starting to notice new things about Justin on her second visit to the club. One, he was a lot more comfortable around her now that they’d talked. He’d come smile at her, pat her on the shoulder, and then do the same with another customer.
She still had so many questions. Five years ago he’d disappeared. He hadn’t had a single deep conversation with her outside the club since.
“I’m going to take a walk,” Molly said, leaving the board game Nicole had started. She went to the back window and looked out. Did Justin see this view every night? Maybe that would make working here worthwhile.
“Mind if I join you?”
She turned to see Justin walk up beside her. She smiled and turned back to the window.
The city below was so dark, so sheltered under the clouds over the bay. She felt Justin beside her like warm air across her skin, soothing the hairs down into submission.
“So are you going to make this a habit?” he asked, too close to her neck, sending a tingle down a nerve that seated at the bottom of her hip. She hid the shudder.
“What, coming to the club?” she asked, putting a hand up to press against the glass.
“You know I have to wipe those fingerprints off.”
She left her hand on the glass but looked at him with one eyebrow raised. “I didn’t know.” She dragged the hand down, watching the heat smudge left behind spreading on the glass.
She gasped when he slid a hand over hers, holding it in place, for a moment. She looked at it, at its tanned largeness, the long fingers strong and masculine and manlier than she’d expected. His hands were rougher too.
He nudged his fingers around to wrap her hand, and squeezed for a second. Molly was about to say something when he pulled her hand from the glass. And released it.
“Actually, I do clean it pretty diligently. That glass is probably still not the best thing to rub on.”
“Because it’s not clean?” she asked, wondering if he was being protective. The old Justin always had been.
“Because you might ruin the view for the other clients,” he said.
He was impossible. She shoved him halfheartedly.
“You are impossible.”
“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.”
“Hmph.”
“Wait here a moment.”
He grabbed two chairs and brought them over to the window.
“Let’s sit,” he said. “If you are going to be certain the window is the most fascinating part of the building, you might as well sit in comfort.”
“So spoiled,” she said. “I guess you aren’t used to much exertion.”
“Are you kidding? I’m a male escort.”
She flushed, a sick feeling in her stomach. Why had he resorted to this? The Justin she had known was smart, one of the top in the class, with very little effort, certainly much less than she had put in. So why?
He pushed a chair behind her legs in a way that made her topple down. Then he held the back and turned it to face slightly inwards towards the other chair, which he sat in.
“Why?”
He glanced at her, then back out the window and sighed.
“Why this, you mean? Why the club? Why not engineering?” He frowned. “Why not?”
“Because you were studying engineering, and you were good at it.”
“Still am.”
“Still?”
“One of the stars at night school. Got a couple online courses as well.”
“I see.” She smiled. “Still ditching class?”
“Sure, but there’s less class to ditch.”
“Great.”
“So tell me more about what you’re doing.”
“Work?”
He nodded and she leaned back in the chair and pulled one leg up to rest on the other.
She thought about it and could feel Justin’s eyes on her. She looked over and saw he was looking at her mouth. He turned back to the window when she caught him.
“You’re making me uncomfortable,” she said.
“What?” He looked up.
“Checking me out,” she said. “We both know I’m not your type, and there’s no reason for you to be doing it, so stop. It makes me uncomfortable.”
“So it would be okay if you were my type and there was a reason for it?”
Her mouth fell open for a moment then snapped itself shut. “No.”
“Fine,” he said. He faced the window with folded arms and a pout.
“Fine,” she said. “What is there really to say about my work? You were in my major. You know what we do.”
“I don’t know what you specifically chose to do though,” he said. “There is some variety in computer engineering.”
She looked at him like a driver surveyed roadkill on the road and decided it was unavoidable. “I don’t know why we are even talking about this. I don’t know why we are pretending we are friends when we aren’t.”
“Can we really not be Molly?”
“I don’t see how,” she said. “I don’t know that you ever were.”
“Okay, I’m sick of this,” he said. “I left. I know. And I didn’t tell you why. But it was for your ow
n good. To protect you.”
“To protect me?”
“Besides, it’s not like you ever wanted to see me outside of class and studying. How could I have known you cared so much? You have a way of keeping everything in, Molly.”
“I don’t even know why you kept inviting me out when I said no so much.”
“Believe it or not Molly, I wanted to spend time with you. Non-homework time.”
She pressed her top teeth to her bottom teeth. What did he even mean? Non-homework time, what would they have had in common then? Not that she hadn’t imagined time alone with him, even a date in her more bizarrely farfetched fantasies. She didn’t want to think about all of the times he was kind. She wanted to focus on her anger so that she didn’t end up getting attached again to someone who could just disappear.
“Why did you leave? You say you wanted to protect me, but I don’t see how you could do that by disappearing.”
“This is what I always liked about you Molly,” he said. “You always lay it on the table.”
“This is what I hate about you: you speak in riddles that I can’t understand.”
“I left because I had to,” he said. “I left to protect you and everyone else. If I told you more it would defy the whole point of leaving.” He stood and folded his arms and leaned on the window. He hunched slightly and ducked his head, like he’d been walking in the sun and suddenly been hit by a rainstorm. She felt an uncertain impulse, to go to him, to touch him, though she knew little about how to comfort with touch, and how to tell if someone wanted you to comfort them that way.
“I guess I’m just supposed to be okay with that?” she said. “I guess I can be.”
When he turned to her with a surprised look, she stood and came to him at the window. She brushed a lock of hair back from his face, and he turned to her with shocked, vulnerable eyes that seemed to expect her to wound him. How had she missed this Justin in the years she had known him? Why hadn’t she wanted to see it?
“We all have secrets,” she said. “I’ll protect yours, whether you share them with me or not.”
