by Opal Mellon
“I don’t get it.”
“I don’t know if you ever will,” he said, then leaned down and captured her mouth again, tilting her head with one long finger. “I don’t know if you have to.” He pulled back and looked down. “Can’t you feel it?” He kissed her again.
She melted in, let him show her. Pulled away after a few moments of bliss. “What does this mean?”
“It means a lot of school,” he said. “A lot of therapy.”
She nodded. Blinked.
“It’s means watching lots of anime together. It means lots of walks on the beach, someone to fall asleep with. It means I never should have left you those years ago. It means I’m choosing to be happy.”
“What about me?” she said, putting a hand in his hair. It wasn’t as soft as she’d expected. Somewhat wiry. “What do I get?”
His hand covered hers. He pulled it down to his mouth, pressed his mouth there for a moment while he thought.
“What do you want?”
She took him in, like she could take a snapshot of his face at this moment, handsome, demanding. Wondered if he was just saying this out of stress. “It’s really sudden Justin.”
“I don’t think so,” he said. “It’s been years. Years and years Molly.”
She nodded. “I think I’ve been waiting all along.”
He sighed. “I think we’re probably weird enough that we are the only two who could make the other happy.”
She laughed and touched her nose to his.
Epilogue
Justin waded out behind Molly in the waves. When it got deep enough, he swept her up in his arms. She was light, the water holding most of her weight, so that she drifted in his arms. He laughed and jumped with oncoming waves, unsuccessful in keeping all water out of their faces. He reached the part of the sea where the waves stopped cresting and became gentle rolls that rose and fell, taking them along. He looked down to see her quietly watching him, wide eyes gray and reflecting the cloudy sky overhead.
“Happy three months, sweetheart,” he said, hugging her against him.
She grinned. “You can put me down. I’m a good swimmer.”
“No,” he said. He leaned down and kissed her quickly, then looked out to the horizon at the end of the water. “The sunset is beautiful.”
She looked out as well, shivered slightly. “Lots of gray.”
“Silver,” he said. “I see silver, shining in rings around the clouds and the sun behind them.”
“You found the silver lining?”
“Yes.” He pulled her lower below the water so less air could blow across her. “You cold? Should we go in?”
“Not yet,” she said.
The sky darkened, silver turned to steel. The water gentled. She shivered in his arms. He kissed her. Gently, though he wanted to be aggressive, couldn’t stop doing it ever since the day with Chuck. Couldn’t stop proving over and over that it was different with her. And it was.
As soon as their lips touched, pain crept in. The warmth that settled in his stomach as they kissed kept the darkness at bay, made him afraid to lose that warmth, afraid that without it the dark would take him. But for this moment he’d choose warmth, choose Molly. He loved the feel of her body against his, loved the feeling of supporting her. Couldn’t wait to take her home and plop down on the couch to watch a ridiculous anime.
She pulled away from him and watched him. Sometimes he felt exposed and naked when she watched him. Sometimes he felt protected by it.
“Do you have homework tonight?”
He snorted and dropped her in the water beside him. “Always the moment killer.”
She treaded water smoothly, looking like a mermaid, complete with unruly, kelpy curls. “I’m practical.”
“I guess one of us has to be.”
She nodded and smiled.
“Can we finish the sunset?” He loved being next to her and watching the horizon. It gave him the feeling that they would end together.
“It’s going to be awfully dark,” she said. “I’m going back.” She turned and made a lot of movement towards the beach but very little actual progress. He stole one more moment to watch the sun disappearing beneath the waves and the darkness becoming beautiful around it, then moved to his wife and carried her back to shore.
#
Hi,
Thank you for reading Out of the Blue! I hope you enjoyed it. If you did, you can support the series and help others find this book by leaving an honest review.
You can also visit me at opalmellon.wordpress.com, where you can sign up for my newsletter or contact me with any questions or concerns. I’d love to hear from you!
I so appreciate you taking the time to read my books,
Opal Mellon
Here’s a quick preview of Chandler’s story in To Love You More, book 3 in the Sunset Series, available now.
Jenny slid down in front of the pole, letting her hand slide slowly above her until her butt hit her heel, the other leg extended out to the side. All she could feel was the darkness and the music, moving through her body like a memory, pulling the faces of the men far from her, like they didn’t exist, and it was only her and her heart and the music. She pushed away from the pole and swung to face it, staying low. She remembered Geoff, could see his face through the music, could feel him around her, and let her body undulate to the rhythm. Could feel everything, the heartache, the desperation, the love, the arousal, as she stood and continued to dance.
She kept her eyes closed. The world wasn’t there, just her and her body, and a melody that made her think life wasn’t over, even if her husband’s was. She held the top of the pole, caressing it like a lover, loving the strength it lent her in a terrifying world.
Putting all of her weight on it, she swung her leg and lifted off into a spin. As the world flew by she opened her eyes to the blur and felt tears fly off in the wind. She clutched the pole and pulled her legs in to land. The floor hit her stilettos like reality. Rough, but she stood gracefully. She would get through this. She spun to put the pole against her back, put her hands behind her head and around the pole, and slowly lowered herself to her knees. She looked heavenward as she slid, and was still looking when the music ended, and the applause started.
The applause, the faces, the spotlight on a figure bathed in emotion, posed on a pole as if pleading to heaven, and money falling around her. She would survive.
She let her head drop forward for a moment, then stood with a swish of her bottom, and bowed. She moved to the front and collected the money that had been thrown. She needed it to feed Evan. She avoided the hands near the money easily, for the most part. And though a few touched her, she was long dead to that kind of touch. She headed back to the dressing room. Moved through it like you moved through a nightmare, avoiding the other women. All she could think of was a small boy that held her world and her need to get back to him. She pulled on pants and a coat and headed out into the parking lot.
When she walked out from the overhang, she zipped her coat up. An odd chill moved through her and she looked around. Her car was close, so she moved towards it steadily, as if she wasn’t afraid. As if there had never been a time when she’d been protected, had someone to walk with. As if this was fine. She got to the passenger’s side door and sighed. Someone had gotten in again. She looked around the dark lot once more, then opened the door to survey the damage.
She felt that someone was watching, so she crawled in and closed the passenger door behind her and continued to search her car. Someone had taken her spare bag, the one with her other shoes. Ridiculous. What was wrong with people? The adrenaline of dancing was wearing off, along with all of the heartfelt emotion that she allowed herself to bathe in only during the times she most needed it. No time to think of Geoff when Evan needed care. No time for regret when she had to sleep, to clean, to cook. She didn’t need a life beyond that. Would never risk that again.
Chapter 1
Chandler Wilson stormed into his sister’s offic
e and threw a paper down on her desk. “How can you hope, no pun intended, to keep this place running with another resignation?”
Hope sighed. “I don’t know what you want me to say. Justin’s too busy with school. We can’t expect these men to stay forever.”
Chandler softened, looked his half-sister over, noting the dark wisps at the back of her neck escaping her always immaculate ponytail and the shadows under her dark eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“Just tired,” she said. “Maybe I’ll have to close Club Blue. I don’t know what I can do without Chuck or Justin. They practically were this club. Without them …” She put her head forward in her hands and rubbed her face.
“I’m sorry,” Chandler said.
“No you’re not. You’ve always wanted this, always thought a host club was ridiculous.”
“I’m sorry because it’s your dream then.” It was true he hated the club, found it an embarrassing mark on the family’s name and wouldn’t miss it if it closed. His dad didn’t see why they shouldn’t invest in their own family, since they invested in what seemed like every other startup. His dad didn’t know the club was a place where women hired dates.
“If you’re really sorry, you could help me save it.” She took the paper from him. “I wonder why he sent one to you as well.”
“Probably just to annoy me. Maybe to rub it in my face because I’m an investor. I may hate the idea of this place, but I wanted it to succeed and be profitable.”
“You always did look at Justin like he was pond scum.” Hope laughed, then dragged her hands down her cheeks again. “What are we going to do?”
“Not let women into the club who are trying to steal our escorts away?”
“I’m happy for Justin. We just need to recruit more. Logan’s really developed a lot. I think he’d be able to fill Justin’s shoes for a while. I can’t believe Chuck resigned too. He’d have been perfect.”
Chandler moved to the windowsill and sat, blocking some of the sun, hoping it would help Hope feel a little better. It was so bright in this office in the morning.
Hope looked him over, and Chandler didn’t like it. She was the exact image of her mother, sharp, dark and beautiful, with sparkling black eyes that were calculating something involving him. Nothing like his mother, the one he’d lost before his dad had married Hope’s mother and had Hope.
“You know … ” She gave him a long head to toe look and his stomach gurgled.
“Oh no,” he said. “No you don’t.”
“Maybe just a couple of nights. Just until hiring picks up.”
“Oh no. No, no, no, no. No.” He punctuated his statements with a pointed finger. “I’ll help you interview, I’ll help you hire, I’ll even help you promote. But no way I’m going in there.”
“Oh come on,” Hope said. She stood and moved over to sit by him, put an arm around him as he stiffened. “It might be fun. You need to get out, need to date, anyway.”
He tried to pull away but couldn’t. He adored his sister. “They wouldn’t want me anyway,” he said. “I’m not charming. I spend my whole day around numbers. And I’m, well.”
“Tall, dark and handsome?”
“I was going to say not the usual.” He hated being half-black, half-white. He was out of place wherever he went, and tired of the staring, the “what race are you” guessing game. Best to stay in the office.
“Chandler,” she said. “You need to be around people our age. It really doesn’t matter.”
“No Hope. I can’t.”
“What do you expect me to do then, just give up?”
“No. We just need to recruit.”
“Yeah.” She sighed again and Chandler ground his teeth.
“What would I even do?”
“You just talk to people,” she said. “Just make the women feel welcome. And if they want to hire you, take them out.”
“No. I’m not going out on dates.”
“You know.” She pulled back and gave him a shove. “How are you supposed to know who to recruit, who would be good at the job, if you don’t even know what they do?”
Chandler supposed they really had been more dependent on Justin than he’d ever wanted to admit. He hadn’t wanted to understand this world, had assumed people like Justin and Evan were just born into it, and let them handle it. If it had been any other business he’d have been equally invested in, he would have tried to understand more about the essential product. And the product was the men. But he didn’t think he could be that product, no, not even to save Hope’s club.
“How about I just interview our current escorts about their experiences?”
Hope shook her head. “The clients are just women, Chandler. They won’t bite.”
“I don’t know,” Chandler said. “You know, Dad expects me to handle a lot of other investments than this one.”
“Yeah, but I bet he expects you to take care of your sister.”
“I could tell him what this club really does.”
“You wouldn’t dare.”
“Fine,” Chandler said. “I won’t. And you can’t make me go in there. Ever.”
“Fine,” Hope said. “But you might just lose a lot of money when we go under because word gets around we don’t have anyone worth hiring.”
Jenny opened the garage from within the car, and then pulled in slowly, keeping an eye out to make sure Evan hadn’t run outside to see her. Sometimes he stayed up no matter what Brittany did. He wanted to see his mommy, and Jenny couldn’t help but be delighted when he ran into her arms, beaming and holding her. Nothing tonight though.
She got out of the car, stretched, and went inside. The lights were off, except for one in the living room. She moved through the kitchen and into the living room, where Brittany was asleep with Evan beside her. The TV was still playing something from Cartoon Network, so she picked up the remote and turned it off.
Brittany woke up, yawned and stretched. Evan didn’t stir. “Sorry Jenny, he didn’t want to sleep tonight. Not till you got home.”
“It’s okay.” Jenny reached down and lifted him in her arms, noting how much heavier he was getting now. The difference between three and four was staggering. He stirred slightly, turned towards her and snuggled. She seemed to melt all around him and suddenly felt tired, weak on her stilettos. She turned to Brittany. “Can you carry him upstairs? I’m still in my shoes. I’ll be up in a minute.”
“Sure.” Brittany stood and took him, then started towards the stairs.
Jenny bent and unhooked the clasps on her shoes. Her sweats kept getting in the way so she dropped them and stepped out of them, then pulled off the shoes, then slung them back on. She hoped Brittany wouldn’t come down before she was done. She took off her coat and went up the stairs in her sequined bra. She went to her bedroom quickly and changed into a soft sports bra and T-shirt. She moved to the mirror, brushed her short hair back with her fingers, and washed the heavy glitter away.
She could see her son now.
She walked to his room quietly, hoping not to wake him. Brittany came out and closed the door behind her.
“He’s totally out now,” she said. “He must know you are home, even if he didn’t wake up for it.”
Jenny nodded. “Thanks Brittany. What do I owe you?”
“Oh forget it. Just pay me the usual at the end of the week.”
“But you had to come in tonight extra.”
“And I enjoyed it.” Brittany gathered her stuff as they spoke. “Look, I love this job, and if you have to take an occasional extra shift, I shouldn’t have a problem with doing the same.”
“But I—”
“Shh.” Brittany gave Jenny a hug and a little pat on the shoulder. “That’s what sisters are for. You work too hard.”
“I hope you didn’t have too much homework.”
“Not at all,” Brittany said. “Do you need anything else? If not I’m going to head out.”
“Of course,” Jenny said. “It’s late.”
&nbs
p; She walked Brittany out, then watched her pull away safely, and shut the garage. She’d wait for a text that told her Brittany was okay, and then she’d sleep too. Maybe.
She crept to the stairs, looked up towards Evan’s room, and decided it would be okay to go see him. She opened the door as quietly as she could, and moved over to the bed. At first she just listened to see that he was breathing, and when she heard the quiet air moving in and out, her heart relaxed. She sat gently on the edge of his bed. Touched his hair. She longed to hold him, longed to be held. Longed to be safe for a moment, to feel loved, but she didn’t want to wake him. A tear fell before she could stop it. She leaned forward and over him, letting herself rest on him for a moment. She had to be strong for him. She had to be okay for him.
Every night at the club was the same as the first time. A moment where she danced and expressed and ached and let herself believe that the men were enjoying her art, and not anything else. Maybe she could stay in that fantasy world forever. And it wasn’t just the money that made it possible to keep their house and not ever depend on someone again. It was the way that the spotlight and the pole and the music made her feel alive, totally alone without being lonely. No one could understand. Not even the other girls.
What she wouldn’t give to not feel lonely, to feel like someone understood. Not another widow, though. She didn’t know if she could stand having another widow as a friend, like somehow their pain would multiply together.
She did wish occasionally to be with someone who understood the pull of the service industry. The way you could be seen as an object but still feel like a person. Someone who didn’t judge. Someone who knew that beyond the desperation, there was a person with feelings and reasons of their own for being on display.
And she missed being around men. It had been three years now, and she could admit it. She missed men. Not the men at Sandz, or all the men in the world like them. But men you could talk to. Men you felt safe with. She guessed that even men that would normally be safe for women would treat her differently once they found out what she did. She guessed the only person who could really understand would be a male stripper. She went to her computer.
