The air clogged in her lungs. “Is that what you want?”
“Hell, no. I want you in my bed. Every night. But I won’t push you.”
Unexpected relief bubbled through her, insane thoughts that maybe he was right. “You’ve been pushing me from the start.”
When she leaned into him, she felt the smile that curled his mouth against her shoulder. “I guess maybe I have. Please tell me you’ll at least think about it.”
Her eyes slid closed, and she wrapped her arms around his shoulders. How could she fight him on this when deep down she knew it was what she wanted? “Okay, I’ll think about it.”
His arms tightened around her. “Thank you, Lord.”
Held firm in his embrace, she almost believed they could make this work. She eased back enough to look in his eyes. “I’d like to spend some one-on-one time with Julia today. I was thinking of taking her shopping.”
“I don’t want you out there alone right now.”
“Ryan, a few hours of shopping downtown won’t kill us. We’ll be in a crowd. I promise not to take her anywhere dangerous.”
She saw the hesitation in his eyes, so she pushed back. “You can’t keep me locked up here like a prisoner, you know.”
Indecision ran over him. Finally, he said, “Okay. I need to go into the office for a while. I can get John from security to go with you.
She shot him a look. “No way. I don’t need some security detail hovering over us when I’m trying to connect with Julia. That’ll make things worse.”
“Katie—”
“But I know how you worry,” she said quickly, seeing the persistence in his eyes. “So how about a compromise? I’ll call you to check in. Just to ease your mind.”
He frowned. “Every hour.”
She rolled her eyes. “God, you’re worse than a mother hen. Okay, every hour.”
The look in his eyes said he didn’t like the idea, but he wasn’t going to fight her. “Julia has softball practice this afternoon.”
“I can drop her off, then come back and get you.”
He nodded reluctantly. “I guess that could work.”
“Do you want a list of where we’re going too?” she asked, smiling. When his scowl deepened, she leaned in and kissed him. “Will you please let me go shower now before my parents get up?”
He let go of her, but she knew he was still watching her as she headed up the stairs.
“Need any help?” he called.
When she glanced back, the sly smirk tugging at his mouth almost did her in. Right or wrong, she had a sinking suspicion she was going to end up giving him exactly what he wanted.
***
“How about this one?” Kate held up a pink sweater.
“Pink? Are you serious?” With a huff Julia turned back to the rack she’d been studying. She pulled out a frayed, neon-green, fitted T-shirt that looked like it had been through the ringer. “I like this.” With a challenging smile, she held it out to Kate.
Across the front were the words, Pinch Me. I’m Hot and Sexy.
Metal clanged against metal when Kate grasped it and hooked it back on the rack. “I don’t think so.”
“Why not?”
Kate wasn’t about to fall for it. She’d already seen Julia’s claws today. “Because you’re nine. And they won’t let you wear that at school. And your father would kill me if I bought that for you.”
“A lot you know. I go to a private school. We wear uniforms.”
Kate stood in the middle of the junior section, staring after Julia. No truer words had been uttered that day. A lot you know. That was the problem here. She didn’t know a lot when it came to Julia. Didn’t know anything, as a matter of fact.
Feeling like a failure, she followed Julia out of the store. They climbed into Ryan’s Jag, and the motor hummed to life. After texting Ryan for the hundredth time to give him a status update, Kate pulled into midafternoon traffic. She and Julia had spent the whole morning shopping and hadn’t agreed on a single thing. If it were possible, this little excursion had done more to damage their relationship than help it.
Kate rubbed her aching head.
“Where are we going?” Julia asked.
Kate changed lanes on the freeway. “I need to run out to my house and pick up a few things.”
Julia rolled her eyes and leaned back against the seat. “You could have dropped me off at home first.”
Kate bit back her temper. She wasn’t going to fall into Julia’s woe-is-me trap. She pulled off the freeway.
“Why aren’t you staying at your own house, anyway?” Julia asked.
“Didn’t your dad talk to you this morning?”
Julia crossed her arms and looked out the window. “Yeah, he did. It still doesn’t answer my question, though. I know why he wants you at the house, but why are you going along with him? You know you don’t want to be there.”
Kate’s fingers gripped the wheel as she made a turn. “I do want to be there, Julia. Your dad and I both think spending time together as a family will help all of us.”
“One big happy family? It won’t last. Not with you.” She turned so Kate couldn’t see her face.
Kate breathed deep, her temper almost to a breaking point. “What’s it going to take for you, Julia? I’ve been bending over backward trying to get to know you, but you keep butting heads with me. What do I need to do to prove I’m not leaving again? That I want a chance to make it up to you?”
“You want a chance?” Julia’s blazing eyes shot to her. “I’ll tell you what you can do. Stop seeing my dad.”
“What?” The car swerved around a corner. Roaring waves crashed against rock off to the right. Cliffs covered in brush rose to the left.
“You heard me. Stop seeing my dad. You don’t love him. You know you don’t. The longer you let this go on, the worse it’s going to be when you decide to leave again. You don’t have any idea what he was like before. I don’t want to go through that again!” Her gaze shot to the churning Pacific below.
Kate’s chest ached with a fierceness she didn’t expect. She wanted so badly to reach out to Julia, to comfort some of that raging anger, but she didn’t know how. Hearing the words from Julia’s lips reinforced all of Kate’s fears.
What would happen to Julia if this relationship didn’t work out? She couldn’t put Julia through that a second time. And what about Reed? He was falling for Ryan in a big way. If she moved in with Ryan like he wanted and then eventually left, it would kill Reed’s little spirit.
You don’t love him. You know you don’t.
That was the ultimate question, wasn’t it? She was wildly attracted to Ryan, felt deeply connected to him, but was that love?
What she felt for Ryan was stronger than anything she’d ever felt before. She knew that, could admit it. Her heart told her it was love, but her mind was left questioning her judgment. She’d been so wrong about Jake. She didn’t want to make another horrible mistake. Acting on an impulse would only make things worse. She had to be sure.
The car whipped around the next corner, faster than Kate realized. She eased her foot to the brake.
Nothing happened.
Confusion gripping her, she pressed down again. When the car still didn’t slow, she pumped the brake. Instead of slowing, they seemed to pick up speed down the hill.
Fear prickled Kate’s skin. She tried to keep her voice calm. “Julia, climb into the backseat. Put your seat belt on and—”
“Why?”
“Listen to me! The brakes aren’t working. Get in the back now! Snap your seat belt and hold on. Do it!”
Julia’s eyes grew wide. Without another word, she climbed into the back.
Kate’s mind tumbled as she recalled the road. Ahead were some curves followed by a downgrade, which would inevitably speed them up, and another curve followed by a steady incline with a curve at the top. If she could keep the car under control until they got to the slope, they had a chance.
She pulled on the e
mergency brake, but nothing happened. Her heart raced, and she glanced at the dash. A quarter of a tank of gas—it wouldn’t run out in time. She swallowed the fear. “Julia. My purse is in the backseat. Find my cell phone. Call nine-one-one.”
Julia fumbled with Kate’s purse. “Can’t you just turn the car off?”
“No. The steering will lock up if I do. I’m going to try to downshift. Hold on, it’s going to give us a jolt.”
She held the wheel with one hand and shifted the automatic transmission into third gear. Sweat trickled down her back, but the shift was smooth, slowing them only slightly. She was already into a curve, trying as hard as she could to keep the car on the road. She downshifted again when the road straightened. The car bucked slightly.
They slowed down a little, enough to make the next two turns, then hit the downgrade. Kate tightened her grip on the steering wheel.
Julia’s muffled voice drifted to the front of the car as she spoke to the nine-one-one operator in a panicked tone.
They weren’t going to die like this. Kate drew in courage. She wouldn’t let them.
The car picked up speed, whipped around the next curve. A muffled sob tore from Julia as her body slid against the side of the car. Kate downshifted one more time into first, sending them rocketing forward.
Her hands were wet with sweat when she made the next turn, and the car whipped across the road, tires skidding over gravel. Julia screamed. Kate’s muscles tensed, and she managed to straighten out the car. It slowed considerably. Optimism settled over Kate for the first time since realizing the brakes were out.
Then her eyes caught the last turn coming up.
Oh, shit. They weren’t going to make it. She glanced down to check their speed. They were still going too fast. She’d miscalculated the number of turns. They should be on the rise by now, but they weren’t.
The road veered off sharply to the left. Ahead and to the right, the cliff dropped thirty feet to a small bay. If she tried to make the turn, they’d roll. She knew it. They’d roll down the embankment and most likely die.
She had only a split second to make a decision.
Chapter Twenty
“Julia, hold on.”
Kate gunned the engine. The car sailed off the cliff toward the water. Julia screamed again in the backseat, and for one terrifying moment, it was as if they were flying.
The car hit the water; the airbag deployed. Kate’s head smashed forward and back, hit something hard. The car bobbed for a few minutes before it took on water and the weight of the engine started to pull them down.
Cold water seeping in at her feet brought Kate around. Her head pounded. Every muscle in her body ached. With frantic fingers she unbuckled her seatbelt, swore frantically when she couldn’t get out of it.
They weren’t dead. They weren’t dead, yet.
“Julia!” Kate tried to shake the fuzziness from her mind. She climbed into the backseat where Julia’s head lay against the window, her eyes closed. “No, no, no.”
Julia’s head moved to the side, and she slowly opened her eyes. “What…what happened?”
“Oh, thank God,” Kate exclaimed. “Come on, we have to get out of here.”
Kate pushed against the back door, tried the windows. They wouldn’t budge. Shifting back to the front seat as water continued to spill into the vehicle, she found the windows there were stuck as well.
“They won’t open. They won’t open!” Julia shrieked.
Using her foot, Kate tried to bust the front windshield at the corner, but it wouldn’t move.
Darkness tried to draw her down. Kate shook her head, blinked and forced herself to stay awake. She was having trouble thinking and seeing clearly. Everything in front of her was blurry. “Okay, just relax, Julia. Listen to me.” She grasped Julia’s shoulders as the ice-cold water reached their bellies. “Listen. We have to wait for the water to fill the car. Once it does, it’ll equal out the pressure. We can’t open the doors right now because there’s too much pressure pushing on them. Once the car fills, the doors will open.”
“No, they won’t!” Julia hollered, cradling her arm against her stomach. “We’re going to drown!”
“Listen to me. They will. Trust me. Don’t panic, baby.”
“I’m scared,” Julia whispered, grasping Kate’s hand.
“I know. It’s okay. We’re not going to die in here, you hear me?” Julia nodded as the car continued to fill. “We’re going to make it. Just think good thoughts, okay? Think about Daddy and Reed and what you want to do tomorrow.” Kate’s vision blurred again, and she shook her head to clear it.
She had to stay awake. She had to stay coherent.
When the water level reached their necks, Julia’s fingers tightened.
“Just a little more, baby,” Kate murmured and lifted her chin. She took one last deep breath, gestured for Julia to do the same, then tried the door again. When it didn’t budge, her heart dropped.
Icy tentacles of fear wrapped around Kate’s throat.
Don’t panic. Try again.
This time Kate put her back into it. With one good thrust of her body, the driver-side door opened. She grasped Julia’s hand and pulled her out of the sinking vehicle. Light flickered at the surface above. Kate kicked as hard as she could.
They broke the surface together, gasped for air. Kate treaded water, gripped Julia’s shoulders, and checked her face for signs of shock. “You’re okay,” she told her. “We’re okay. Kick your legs, Julia.”
Julia spit water and tried to breathe deep.
“Can you swim?” Kate asked.
With a shaky nod, Julia tried to kick for land. Kate wrapped an arm around her when she realized Julia was having trouble. Gentle waves lapped at the shore of the bay. Crashing water pounded rocks on the other side of the spit. Kate’s energy waned as she dragged Julia out of the water.
Sirens blared in the distance. Kate dropped to her knees next to Julia and sucked in air. Water dripped around her, sending shivers down her spine, but all she could focus on was her daughter.
Julia lay on her back, her eyes closed, her chest fighting for air as she cradled her arm against herself. Kate grabbed her hand. “Stay with me. Hold on, baby.”
Relief bubbled through Kate when voices echoed from the road above. Help. They’d made it.
Julia’s hand slipped out of hers.
Kate glanced down sharply only to realize Julia wasn’t moving anymore.
***
Thrusting bills at the cab driver, Ryan sprinted from the yellow taxi. The automatic emergency room doors opened, and he dashed into the reception area. A woman holding a sick baby stood in line at the front desk, rocking back and forth. A man with a blood-tinged bandage draped over his hand waited behind her.
Ryan pushed his way to the front of the line.
“Sir, you’re just going to have to wait your turn.” The receptionist sent him a wicked glare.
Fear clenched its icy hand around his heart. “My wife and daughter were in a car accident.”
The receptionist’s face softened. “Last name?”
“Harrison.” He shook his head. “And Alexander.”
Time ticked by second after miserably long second while she checked her computer. The baby behind him screamed. Ryan raked a frustrated hand through his hair and was ready to climb over the counter to check the screen himself when the receptionist finally said, “Room five. Go through the double doors—”
He turned and waited for her to buzz him though. Pungent institutional cleaners cut through the hallway air. A crash cart was pushed up against a wall. Medical staff chatted around the nurse’s station.
Terror clawed through him as he checked doors, frantically searching for room five. When he finally found it, the muscles in his chest tightened, and he whipped around, heading for the nurse’s station.
A blonde intern leaning against the counter looked up. “Can I help you, sir?”
“Room five’s empty.” Panic made his voi
ce crack.
The blonde looked over at a redhead in blue hospital scrubs seated behind the counter. “Didn’t they take her up to surgery?”
Surgery? No, no, no. Ryan caught his breath.
The redhead checked a chart. “I think so. Car accident, right?”
“Where?”
“Um, let me see.” She flipped papers on a chart.
Good God, couldn’t they see he was dying here?
“Wait,” the redhead said. “That was the woman in six. Five’s in X-ray.”
Sweet Jesus, did they take classes on how to torture family members? “Where’s that?”
The blonde pointed down the hall. “Take the first left, go all the way to the end and turn right. You can’t miss it.”
He was already jogging down the hall before she finished talking.
The air choked in his throat when he rounded the last corner. Kate was seated on a chair in the hall, bent over at the waist, her head in her hands.
“Oh, my God, baby.” He dragged her out of the chair and pulled her tight against him. His heart thumped out of control when her hands slid around his waist.
Grasping her face, he pulled back enough to look down. Her eyes were red and bloodshot, her cheeks streaked with tears. A square bandage covered a wound above her left eyebrow.
He swallowed, his eyes locking on the bandage. “Are you…?”
“I’m okay,” she said, gripping his elbows. “It’s just a scratch. I hit my head. I’m okay.”
Her voice was weak, but her eyes were steady. On a relieved sigh, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close again. “Thank you, God.”
She wasn’t hurt. But she was alone. Reality settled in. Followed by a gut wrenching shot of fear.
“Where’s Julia?”
Tears filled her eyes. “They’re X-raying her. Oh, Ryan, I told her to get in the backseat. I thought she’d be safer there.”
He took a calming breath. X-rays were no big deal. CT scans, MRI’s…those were the things to worry about. “You did the right thing. Tell me what happened.”
Wait for Me Page 26
