by Patty Jansen
It was all a bit of a chicken and egg thing, and Melati had to force herself to stay focused. She was exhausted and her muscles were starting to go sore from dragging the heavy tanks with Ari.
Finally, Cocaro reached an agreement, helped by Kya. The ship would be allowed to come. They would stay in soft dock while a team of two went into the station. Those people would be guarded and any funny business would lead to their immediate execution. When the work was completed to their satisfaction, they would call in commercial shuttle operators to take away any of the New Pyongyang people who wanted to leave.
To give the team of two a chance of fixing the station’s problems, the plan would be carried out as soon as possible.
* * *
After that, Melati and the rest of the crew went to see Milo. He took the group to the gym, where he set up a passage made out of foam blocks about twenty metres long. He set off a smoke bomb in the middle of it and sent two halves of the team in from either side with the task to make it out the opposite side. They all had stun guns.
He watched each simulation on an IR screen and gave a run-down and instructions each time.
After coming out twice, being driven back once and being stunned twice, Melati had to rush off with Hasegawa to meet Cocaro again. She didn’t even have time to change, and the smell of smoke still hung in her clothes, enveloping her every time she moved.
In Cocaro’s office, they spoke about the flight plan to get to the station, how and when the shield would be deployed—because it was impossible to leave the ship when the shield was operating.
Cocaro also informed her that Dolchova had assigned a bunch of stealth fighters to shadow the ship and to cover it from a distance.
Somewhere around this point, Melati suddenly found herself on the floor, looking up at the worried faces of Cocaro and Hasegawa.
“Uh . . . I think I fell asleep.”
“We just had a close-combat training session with Milo Brown,” Hasegawa explained.
“I had a vacuum training session with Ari this morning.” Or was it yesterday? She could no longer remember.
“High time that we called a halt for the day,” Cocaro said. “Vacuum training is extremely exhausting. Lieutenant Hasegawa, do take Lieutenant Rudiyanto to her dorm.” Her eyes met Melati’s. “I order you to clean up, relax and take a dose of sleeping medication before going to bed.”
Melati protested. “That’s not really necessary—”
“Yes, it is. I understand that you’re worried about your family, but we can’t have that stop you from getting rest you desperately need.”
Melati let Hasegawa help her up and escort her out of the room.
Chapter 17
* * *
JOSHAYA HASEGAWA was a lot taller when he walked next to Melati than he seemed to be when viewed through the sight of a stun gun. He smelled clean and, in between getting stunned in a smoky tunnel and the meeting, he had even managed to tidy his hair.
Everything about him said pilot.
She wished he would keep his arm to himself, because the warm touch of it around her back brought memories she had thought she’d forgotten. Pilots. Istel pilots who came to New Jakarta and in their downtime did only two things: get drunk and fuck their brains out. They didn’t care how much either activity cost. They made lots of money and there was no way to spend any of it in the time they spent travelling through deep space. They liked the brown-skinned little girls, they said. And those girls would line up, all painted faces and glittering bangles, skimpy dresses showing a good deal more skin than their elders would be happy with. They oohed and aahed over everything the pilots said as the night wore on and the state of drunkenness increased. At some point in the night, he would pick a girl and then he would hold his arm around her back, just like Hasegawa did to her: nonchalant, careless, confident. It said You’re mine. I bought you and I’m going to fuck you until you scream for mercy. Except the latter didn’t happen a lot, fortunately. The bar owners made more on the sale of grog than the sale of girls, so the girls got higher tips if they managed to run up the pilot’s tab a bit more.
Eventually, though, the inevitable act needed to be performed.
“See, you’re even too tired to listen to what I’m saying,” Hasegawa said.
“Sorry, I was thinking . . .” of something else.
God, why did she even think of this? She had never spent that much time in the bar scene, because she’d been too naïve and dumb not to fall into the vilest trap of all.
“Too tired. You shouldn’t run yourself down so much. Vacuum training and close combat training in one day. What were you thinking?”
“I was thinking that I want to save my family.” And please get your arm off me. She wriggled by way of suggestion.
Of course he was way too cocky to get the message.
“You have a whole team. You don’t need to do everything yourself.”
“Then tell me which of today’s meetings and training you wouldn’t have attended.” She was getting really irritated. She knew he meant well, but that arm around her back was messing with her emotions.
She was going to have to tell him bluntly not to touch her, with all the consequences that would have for the dynamics of the team.
“Yes, you’re tired. Not thinking clear. Here we go.” He led her into the empty lift. The doors shut.
No, not an empty lift. He would—
Melati checked herself. She was overreacting. He was just trying to help. He was far too much of a professional to do anything else.
And he didn’t, of course, move his hand or start feeling her up while the lift went down. But her skin pricked in all those places where drunk pilots would grope.
Out of the lift and into the corridor. Fortunately, her dorm wasn’t far. He stopped in front of the door, which was closed. She assumed that none of the others had returned from their shifts yet.
“I’m all right now.” She stepped away from him, causing that offending arm to slide from her back. Phew. “Thank you.”
“If there is anything else I can do—”
“Thank you. I’m fine. I’ll just clean up and have something to eat and go to bed early.”
“Is the mess open yet?”
“I guess I’ll find out when I get there. If not, I’ll just buy a pre-packaged meal.” Another chunk out of her very average allowance.
He smiled. “You’re welcome to come to the pilot’s rec room. We don’t have any full meals, but there is always hot soup and crackers.”
“I’ll be all right, thanks.” Please, can I go now?
He dug in his pocket and held out a card. “Here, this will let you in.”
“Thanks, but I don’t need it.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.” Please, how many times do I have to say, “No, thanks”?
There was a small noise in the corridor behind her. Hasegawa’s gaze fixed on a point behind her. Melati turned around.
Jas leaned against the wall with his arms crossed over his chest. “Is he bothering you?”
“She is big enough to look after herself,” Hasegawa said.
“It didn’t sound like you were being friendly, mate. It sounded like you were trying to chat her up. How often does she have to say ‘no, thanks’ before it gets through to your thick skull?”
“Jas, please—”
Hasegawa snorted. “See? There you have it. Keep your nose out of places where it doesn’t belong. We were just talking—”
Jas whirled at him. “Shut the fuck up, overstuffed bean bag. Stop harassing her. I know her better than you, and she looked and sounded uncomfortable.”
“I wasn’t harassing her, and I’m not going to be told off by some construct—”
“Say that again and I’ll change the shape of your pretty face—”
“Stop it!” Melati went to stand between them. “What has gotten into you? Both of you! You’re acting like toddlers.”
Hasegawa said, “You’re the leade
r of our team. As a member of the team, it’s my task to look after your health and safety.”
Jas crossed his arms over his chest and glared back at Hasegawa. “Me, too.”
The two men glared at each other.
“Okay then, let me say a few things,” Melati said. “I am the leader of this team, and I order you to stop this silly nonsense.”
Hasegawa protested, “But I was only helping and not doing anythi—”
Heat flushed in Melati’s cheeks. “I am the leader of this team and I will not be interrupted. Furthermore, no one, male or female, will touch me without my permission. Hasegawa, seriously, thank you for taking me here, but I am all right now. Jas, in the future I would like you not to react to a situation that hasn’t developed. You’re both dismissed.”
Both men left, and Melati opened the door to the dorm, trembling. By God, she was angry. They were going on a mission in two days’ time. Whose idea was it to start this sort of nonsense?
She shut the door, barely registering that the light in the room was on, when someone said, “Are you channelling Dolchova or something?” Karmee, in the top bunk.
“What are you doing here?”
“I got my annual shots today. Strange how something that’s supposed to stop you getting sick actually makes you sick.” She pulled a face. “I hate being sick.” Yes, she was wearing pyjamas.
“Oh. I’m sorry for making so much noise.”
“It’s all right. It was entertaining.”
Melati took off her jacket and hung it in her cupboard and then peeled off her sweaty shirt. She flung it in the laundry box. “Men.”
“Eyup,” Karmee said, her voice definite. “Whatever you do, they just keep trying, and trying and trying. It’s sad, really. Think of it, an entire life wasted because their number one activity and priority is trying to get a member of the opposite sex into bed.”
Melati snorted.
“You know, I think Allion has it right, with eighty percent of their workforce female. Apparently the men they do allow are mostly eunuchs. You know, with their bits cut off.”
“Kerakis is a man.”
“Yeah, they put men in charge, because they know ISF reacts better to them, but they’re only sock puppets.”
So the real person in charge of the station was the old woman Melati had seen? The one who looked like someone’s grandmother?
She found her off-duty clothes and went to the showers, where she washed off the smell of smoke and the lingering warmth from Hasegawa’s touch. She should have expected this sort of behaviour from Hasegawa; he was an entitled pilot, after all. But it disturbed her coming from Jas.
She liked Jas. He was a reliable worker and he was really good with the boys, but she didn’t like him in that way. In fact she hadn’t liked anyone in that way for a very long time. A very, very long time.
Her young love had been ripped from underneath her, turned into something so horrific that words could not do it justice. She had wondered if she could ever love again, and it seemed she couldn’t. She kept men at a distance. Was petrified that they would come too close. That they would know too much, that she would come to trust them, only to find herself horribly betrayed. She didn’t just feel petrified, she was also very, very certain that she never wanted to be involved with a man ever again. Because once you gave a man power over you, he would abuse it. Once you became a wife, you would no longer be heard in society. Once you became a mother, your life would forever be measured through your children.
And why was Jas saying these kinds of things anyway? Constructs were given long-term hormonal implants that stopped sexual functions. She should be safe from him. But he hadn’t had his hormonal functions checked since they’d started working on board the ship. She thought, but couldn’t be certain, that Dr Chee would have checked his hormones when Jas’ mindbase and body were reunited. But maybe he hadn’t bothered. Jas was Taurus Army after all. Everyone had expected Jas to disembark at New Hyderabad, together with the other constructs and civilians. His insistence on remaining aboard had prompted Dolchova to instate the on loan from Taurus Army status. Of course he wasn’t on loan as such. In fact, rumour went that Charlotte West, the reclusive owner of the Taurus Army, had given ISF a first-class hiding for their failure to track down the fate of more than two thousand Taurus Army people on New Jakarta.
Melati returned to the dorm a bit later, feeling refreshed. Karmee lay in her bunk, watching something on her PCD, with the glow of the screen reflected on her face. A hearty smell hung in the air.
“What’s that smell?”
“Somebody came and delivered food for you.”
There was indeed a tray on the little desk next to the bed. Melati lifted the lid off the bowl. Soup. Not of the regular mess variety either. The smell was heavenly. There were also a couple of crackers on a plate. Next to the bowl lay a note sheet folded in half. Melati took it with a feeling of dread. It contained a handwritten message:
I’m utterly sorry if I have upset you. My priority is truly the functioning of the team, nothing else. Please accept my apology.
Joshaya Hasegawa.
Well, damn.
She sat down at the desk and started eating. The soup tasted as heavenly as it smelled. They fed the pilots well.
No, he’d done nothing wrong.
Except he’d invaded her personal comfort zone.
Which he couldn’t have known about.
And Jas had picked up on that signal, and overreacted.
“When did they stop checking your hormonal levels?” Melati asked Karmee whose attention had gone back to the PCD.
Karmee made a surprised noise and put down her PCD. “That’s a bit of a personal question.”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”
“It’s OK. They stopped checking when it was clear there was no point.”
“Because you were . . . too old?”
She laughed. “If only. No, I was a bit of a rebel. They stopped checking when my commanding officer walked into me engaging in a certain activity with his best mate.”
“Oh. Ouch.”
“No, not at all. This guy was one of the hottest lovers I’ve had.”
There had been many, obviously.
“OK, the situation was awkward, but I was glad of it, because I hated all that stupid pretence about ‘constructs don’t have sexual feelings’, because it’s bullshit. Those implants run out, sometimes after only a few years. I don’t think mine ever worked at all. I lost my virginity in the second year of schooling, to a boy from the cohort in the next dorm. He was about to go into battle and he was such a hunk. It was so much fun, with all my guys and girls watching, because they all read about it, and were sort of curious, because for some of the poor buggers, the implant really does keep them stupid. They sterilised me before I went out on my first assignment.”
“Ouch.”
“Nah. That’s fine. Never had to worry about anything except the fun. That’s what men are for. They think they own you, but you can turn around and say, ‘I don’t like this. No more sex,’ and you should see how quickly they come around.”
Melati couldn’t imagine living like that. Just the thought of one other man touching her, on any part of her body, gave her the shudders. “I think I prefer the Dolchova way.”
“Eyup, I think you would. Bite their heads off before they can stick any of their bits into you. Probably not a bad idea, if you want to avoid being called names. You’ll go much further with that attitude.” One corner of her mouth went up. With Karmee, it was sometimes hard to know if she was serious or joking.
Melati had finished the soup and its warmth in her belly made her feel sleepy again. Her arms and legs were getting very sore from the training and hauling tanks. She would have to do it again tomorrow, so she obeyed Cocaro’s order and took half a dose of sleeping medicine.
She was out for dead not five minutes later.
Chapter 18
* * *
THE NEXT
DAY was filled with more training and more meetings.
First she met Ari at the flight hall.
Assembling her gear and putting it on while suited was much easier in low-g, but much harder in zero-g. She bounced around on her tether, trying to manoeuvre the gear so that putting it on wouldn’t launch her in an unexpected direction. It was not as tiring as yesterday, but so disorienting.
“The second, large mouthpiece in your helmet is for when you need to spew,” Ari told her helpfully, and not five minutes later she had to use it for that purpose.
She didn’t complain today, even if the smell of vomit hung inside the suit, though she worried that all this hanging upside down might cause it to come out of the container and start sloshing about her helmet. She’d heard plenty of stories about that, too.
All that discomfort was forgotten when they cycled out of the airlock next to the large door where the ships came in.
The side of the ship faced Sarasvati, and the planet hung, huge and blue, in the ink-black sky. Sunlight hit the rings side-on and they were so bright it hurt her eyes. One of the planet’s many moons half-hid behind the rings, a bright semicircle sitting on a bright plain.
And the stars . . . there were millions. And millions. Wow.
“Hey, we’re going to move this way,” Ari said.
They moved themselves hand over hand along the rail for that purpose, with their tethers rattling behind. Large fighter ships were attached to the hull on either side of the railing, blocky, menacing-looking things with missiles attached.
The railing went up to a protrusion on the Felicity’s hull that offered a view of the entire side of the ship, bright in brilliant sunlight. The habitat ring was directly underneath, slowly spinning. Ahead were the dual engine chambers, huge fat tubes that stretched our of sight, massive in comparison with the habitat. The ship’s dark surface made it blend into space.
