by Gennita Low
“I think he wants more than friendship with you,” Amber finally said, not wanting to betray Brad’s confidence. Lily shrugged and turned away. “What he wants, I can’t give. I don’t have it in me.” She picked up her purse. “Got to go. You enjoy your date, okay? Just stop drugging each other. You’ll be fine. You can tell me all about it when you get back.”
“We’ll exchange girlie notes,” Amber said dryly as they went into the kitchen.
“Oh, I’m sure mine will be boring, boring, boring.” Lily headed to the back door. “Ta!”
You’re running out just a bit too fast, my friend. Amber smiled. Sometimes one had to let things play out to see where things were going. She doubted there would be any boring moments in a meeting between Brad and Lily.
Which brought her back to her plans for this evening. His handwriting was small and very neat. Meeting tonight. IM 0900 hours for instructions. Wear something hot.
Instructions. Bah. Who did he think he was? He needed her to help him, not the other way around. One thing was certain. She would have to lay some ground rules with Hawk McMillan.
8
Hawk thumbed through the tourist brochures Dilaver had given to him. Hrvatsko narodno kaza-liste. Beogradsko dramsko posoriste. All the different national and drama theaters.
“Pick any one you want,” Dilaver told him. He was comfortably lounging on his new sofa, still drinking beer. He had told Hawk that he was waiting for an international call, but meanwhile, his nonstop intake of alcohol didn’t bode well. It was going to be one of those nights, the kind Hawk had to steel himself to be part of.
“One’s in Croatia. The other’s in Belgrade,” Hawk pointed out dryly.
“I run business all through the Balkans and the former Yugoslavia, so we’ll go wherever I want next. Or we’ll fly to one place one day and the other the next. We’ll even take Amber along to keep you company if you want.”
“I don’t think the lady can just take off.”
Dilaver shrugged. “I’ll order her to. Or kidnap her. Only if you want her along, of course.”
“Out of curiosity, is there any woman you take with you that you actually have invited, Dilaver?” Hawk asked. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you with anyone but a kafena girl.”
Dilaver made a rude noise. “You’ve obviously been living in the civilized world too damn long, boy. Look around you. I have girls by the dozens at any time I want. Girls to break. Girls to teach. Even a virgin or two, if I’m lucky to get to her before her seller does.” He leaned closer, a lecherous look on his face. “Have you ever broken a girl, Hawk? And I don’t mean just a nice spread between the legs. I mean those obstinate ones, the ones who think they’re better than the rest of them. Oh, I enjoy those the most. And at the end, they’re obedient and willing, just like every girl I’ve got. Now, Amber Hutchens…she thinks she’s better. I can see it in her eyes, in the way she looks at me, but she’s smart, you see. She makes herself useful in other ways, such as sleeping with a powerful man. But one day”—He snapped his fingers—“her usefulness will be over and then I can have her, too. If I want. She’s too old for my liking, but her looks…now, those are still very nice, don’t you agree?”
It took every ounce of control to act detached whenever Dilaver got on this topic. He struggled with the urge to bash the other man’s face in. Six months ago, Hawk’s solution would have been easy. Pull out a weapon. Destroy the piece of shit. He usually countered his disgust by answering as truthfully as he could. That was the first thing he’d learned from his psychological training with GEM, the agency in a joint mission with his SEAL team. Truth would hide his lies, T., GEM’s chief operative, had advised him.
“It’s rather difficult to tell you about appreciating a woman when you’re contemplating breaking and taming her, don’t you think?” Hawk asked. He stretched out his legs in an attempt to release the tension inside him. “Not very appealing.”
“Now it’s your turn to satisfy my curiosity. I’ve been watching you around me for a couple of months now, and you’re like a damn Boy Scout when it comes to women. Now you’re interested in Amber. Don’t you find it exciting that you have the power to take her whenever, wherever you want? That she can be your sex slave? You can own her, just like that.” Dilaver snapped his fingers again. “I get horny imagining her all tied up for my pleasure, but you…all these months…and now you’ve found someone you want, why don’t you go for it, as they say in America? Life’s short. Seize the day.”
Hawk had never met anyone who used clichés like Dilaver. But it made sense, in a warped way. Every action was explained away by some colloquial saying, be it local or foreign, even forcing a woman to be a sex slave.
Again, he was forced to hide behind the truth. “We’re back to her having a powerful boyfriend,” he said.
Dilaver shrugged. “Want to get rid of him? You saved my life. I’ll do that for you.”
Saved his life. So he’d take one for Hawk. Hawk knew he had to get out of the room soon before he said and did something that would betray his real feelings. He affected a yawn. “Nah. I didn’t come here to start a local war over a woman, Dilaver. I have one errand to run for my boss and that’s it.”
“But you’re still considering coming to work for me.”
“Yes.” Then I’ll destroy you somehow. “Your offer sounds interesting.”
“Wait till you see the cache. I’m meeting a middleman right after my international call. I’ll let you in to watch me.” Dilaver checked the time on his cell. “She’s late again.”
“A woman?”
“Oh, it isn’t what you think. She’s my aunt, the one I told you about who is high up in the States. She’s been in the system so long she knows the ins and outs of their international networks better than the chief of the CIA,” Dilaver boasted. “And she’s my aunt. Cool, huh?”
“Dynamite,” Hawk said dryly, knowing that would bring a guffaw out of Dilaver. There was a certain ironic humor in knowing that by the time his SEAL brothers caught up with Dilaver, the brutal Slav would be speaking like a regular surfing dude.
“Let’s go out late, around tenish. Why don’t you go and do those exercise you love so damn much while I conduct some business here? It’s going to be a long night, with tons of partying. Maybe, now that Amber has gotten you all hot, you’ll take some action with a girl tonight, eh?”
Hawk got up from the sofa. He had planned a long night ahead but not in that way. “Later, then,” he said.
Back in his room, after a series of stretches, he changed into his warm sweats, knowing that he wouldn’t have any company if he went jogging. Some of Dilaver’s men had accompanied him at first, but they had given up when they’d realized he was a serious runner. And he had the training to run for a long, long time. He had a good excuse, too; he needed to keep in shape as a guide and Dilaver had seen outright how good a guide he had been, so no suspicions there.
He wanted away from the vicinity of Dilaver for a while. Meditation could only take one’s mind off the dirtiness of his situation for so long. Sometimes, good physical pain did a better job. And he was going to need a good dose of fresh air before venturing back into one of those kafenas tonight. He knew it would be a rough one; Dilaver’s drinking meant an orgy of abuse—breaking and taming girls, as he had called it.
He nodded to one of the many armed guards as he headed down the stairs and out the front door. No one bothered him. He was, after all, their boss’s guest.
“You’re crazy,” Zeti said at the doorway. “It’s cold outside! And you want to run around in all that melted snow? Wait till tomorrow, when it’s warmer.”
“What kind of freedom fighter are you?” Hawk mocked back. “What if you’re called right now to go out and fight?”
“That’s different. You’re talking about running around and around like an idiot, not doing anything.” Zeti showed his weapon. “With this and a few grenades and a Jeep, now, that gives me a reason to go out.”
&nb
sp; Hawk smiled and shrugged. “That’s why you’re a freedom fighter and I’m a guide, I guess,” he said. “See you soon.”
“A sniper will get you one of these days.”
It was a fair warning. There was very little safety in these parts. But Hawk needed the fresh air. “I’m a guide. I’m good at evasion,” he explained lightly, and nodded at Zeti before going out the door.
A cold blast of air welcomed him. He took a deep breath, then started at a steady pace.
To avoid the topic that would stir the swirl of emotions in his soul, he mentally went through his assignment and what he had to achieve for it to end. He was in Phase Three of a long operation that had taken years to come to this point. He couldn’t afford to let his emotions get in the way; many people depended on him, and there were the high stakes of the loss of military lives if he should fail.
The last few months, while “recuperating” under Dilaver’s care, his job was to get close to the kingpin and earn his confidence. He had done that. He needed to get certain information, but so far, Dilaver had just been showing off his “kingdom,” going from province to province, different states that used to make up Yugoslavia to check on his sex-trafficking and drug business. It didn’t help—although Hawk approved—that someone was targeting that part of the Slav’s business. That had meant less focus on what Hawk was after—the weapons that Dilaver had hidden.
Hawk had to accompany him everywhere, of course. It was a way to map out Dilaver’s routes, even though he couldn’t tell whether these were where the weapons were located. He had memorized the different airports and roads, making mental connections between each city, from Belgrade in Serbia, to Sarajevo in Bosnia, to Pristina in Kosovo, and now Velesta, Macedonia. And at every stop, he had seen enough human degradation to last him a lifetime.
He clenched his fists and ran faster. No, he wasn’t going to think about that. He must set his mind on the operation.
Get the locations. Find out about the hidden weapon silos. Then find out the last dropoff location. That was his target. He needed to get that. Once he had achieved this, he was to get his guide to take him there.
His guide. He still couldn’t believe his guide came in the form of a petite blonde who looked as if she should be shopping in Saks rather than running around the Macedonian countryside. But he had already experienced some of her skills, so he knew she had hidden talents. Besides, Jed had picked her and had told him she was the best for the job at the moment.
However—Hawk wiped the sweat dripping from his chin with the back of a hand—how the hell was she going to keep up with him? He wasn’t big-headed, but no matter how skilled a woman was, unless she had trained every day to be a Navy SEAL, her chances of keeping up with him while he tried to outrun Dilaver and his men were slim to none. Especially when Dilaver and his men would be gunning for Hawk once they found out he’d betrayed Dilaver. This was a problem.
And it wasn’t the only problem. Jed had warned him not to trust her all the way. How did one do that? He had spent his military career trusting his teammates when they were together, especially during a battle. He was so close to Jazz, they had been accused of being able to read each other’s thoughts. There was never any question of loyalty in his group. Now, on top of watching his own back, he’d have to watch the woman at his side, too. He now understood his cousin’s dilemma.
Steve had been in love with someone he thought was an assassin. At one point, he had to try to find out who she was planning to off, and just like Hawk’s situation now, he had to pretend to be what he wasn’t. But Steve fell from lust straight into love. Hawk grimaced out a smile as he sped up some more. Love and lust. He was straying back into emotional territory. Stay the course, McMillan.
He had known this operation would be very tough, precisely because of the lack of action in the beginning. He had to take the time to be friends with Dilaver. That meant actually talking to the man and watching him at work and at play. But he hadn’t counted on this growing fury that ate at him. He had nowhere to target his own frustrations and hatred of that monster.
He started to run at full speed, aiming for a tree in the distance. He needed to stop thinking and feeling. Needed to clean his insides out. Pain in his lungs. Good. Pain in his chest. Good. Unable to stop fully, he missed slamming into a low branch by inches. He finally halted, bending over to take deep breaths.
Turn around and repeat, this time steady and slow, McMillan. Then he would be ready for Dilaver’s festivities.
By the time he was showered and rested a few hours later, Hawk felt recharged. All this preparation, as if he were going into battle, when in reality it was more like sitting around and being unable to do anything that he wanted. He looked at his watch. It was almost time for his instant message session.
It had occurred to him that Amber might not come out to play. Well, there was only one way to find out.
He retrieved his small laptop, sat on the bed, and turned it on. After checking to make sure all the safeguards were activated, he opened the shadow drive. He didn’t quite understand it, but just seeing her little icon made him smile. It was green, meaning she was there, waiting.
He typed in her handle. Ambrosia.
Hot Stuff.
His smile widened. He could even hear her using that snotty little tone of voice. I like your new icon.
You did order me to wear something hot.
He did, just to rile her. Is that what you are, then, a little devil on fire? I see I’m going to have to be careful with my choice of words around you since you’re so literal.
You disapprove?
No. I’ll put the fire out. Hawk hadn’t meant to start flirting with her, but she was tempting and beautiful, and definitely a woman with a mind of her own. He would let her lead him for now.
You might get burned.
You’re quick with the comebacks, too. And a good cook. Among other things.
There’s more, and if you aren’t careful you might find out.
I intend to. The unexpected memory of his hand sliding up the silky flesh of her thigh popped up. Soft skin. Strong, strong thigh muscles….
Is this the way we’re going to communicate now? Through IM? I checked this program you have. All data is erased when you shut the window. Impressive. I gather you didn’t write it.
Hawk shook off the image of Amber’s bare thighs. He was definitely in need of a meditation session; thinking about sex when he was supposed to be working was not the right SEAL attitude. He had to get his mind out of his pants and back to business.
Nope. Not my area of expertise. Yours is writing codes and putting them in specific places, isn’t it?
What’s your area of expertise, then?
Apparently, his mind was faster than his resolve. Finding weapons. Haven’t I already demonstrated it? Want me to do it again tonight?
Okay, Hot Stuff, I’ll let you win this time. Why are we meeting like this?
This is the place to establish contact. We don’t have the privacy or time to know where or when to meet, so it’s the best way. All you have to do is pop up the window to establish contact. My PDA will zip the message. But I want to see you tonight.
Why?
Hawk had decided that it was best to keep things vague. First, he didn’t know how much he could trust Amber. Second, for some reason, he wanted to tempt her, as she did him. Maybe to test how much of her was real. Certain discussions need to be done face to face. Also sometimes we’ll be giving each other things.
Like what?
Massages. I like them.
Do you communicate with all other ops like this? It isn’t very professional.
I can ask the same about you. You started our comm by sexually assaulting me.
There was a slight pause before her answer, as if she were taken aback by his accusation. He had worded it that way to see how she would react.
Will it help if I apologize?
No.
That unforgiving? Come on, it was dark and
I didn’t see anything.
That didn’t sound like it was typed by a remorseful woman. Say that to my face when we see each other tonight. It’ll be late. One a.m. or thereabouts.
I’ll be in bed by then.
I have to be with D for a while. I can come into your bedroom and wake you up, if you like. Will you be alone?
No, stay away from my room!
Thought so. Besides, I would like to challenge you one more time.
I’m listening.
D should be busy partying. You know the back alleys in this town. I need you to show them to me. Here’s the addy.
Why? And why at night?
Will tell you later. IM is for establishing comm, remember? You want the rest of the hot stuff, you’ll have to come, sweetheart. Hot Stuff out.
Wait! Wear something hot.
Hawk grinned. She was trying to have the last word. I’m naked now. Is that hot enough?
Amber went offline without a reply. He chuckled quietly. Served her right if she was thinking about his body now. Tit for tat.
He closed the program and, putting the laptop aside, leaned back against the pillows in the bed. He hadn’t flirted with any woman since leaving his SEAL team behind in Asia. His SEAL brothers and he were used to months away from home and especially away from women, and when they were finally back among female company, flirtation came hard and fast as their male libidos bloomed overnight like morning glories.
However, these past few months Hawk had been among female company. Constantly. Dilaver had been checking up on his kafenas and Hawk had to go along. Female sexual slaves. Most of them were paraded in front of him half naked. Some were even willing.
Hawk had never experienced total rejection of something he loved—women. His natural tendency to flirt and tease had disappeared as he grew colder and angrier with everything he had to witness in the kafenas. There was no chance to relax, not with the feeling of helplessness that sat like a boulder on his soul, and it was a test of his willpower not to just go start a war all by himself. But he had a mission to complete and it had very little to do with these poor girls, some of whom fondled him at Dilaver’s orders. Their attempts to seduce him had made Hawk even angrier as he showed nothing on the outside.
