by K. Darblyne
"Oh, excuse me…come on in. Have a seat, Danni." The surgeon was befuddled by her roommate’s appearance at her office.
There was a moment or two of uneasy silence, each of them trying to muster up the courage to address the issue of last night. Their eyes avoided each others gaze by looking all around the small room so as not to settle on the other. Without warning, they both started to speak at the same time.
"I want to…"
"About last night…"
Then both looked at each other as the nervous round of giggling began.
Garrett was the first to regain her composure, "Please, you first." She bowed to the nurse.
Danni held a single index finger up in the air as she drew her giggling to a halt. She thought about how different her roommate seemed now, as opposed to last night. It was almost as if the surgeon was two completely different people. This one was definitely the Garrett that the nurse had looked upon as a friend.
"I want to tell you that I’m sorry for questioning your judgement in front of the team last evening." The nurse held her hand up to stop any rebuttal from her friend. "I was wrong. I should have talked to you in private. I’m sorry for not doing that." She let her hand come down to rest at her side. "I’ll understand if you don’t want me to be on your team."
The azure pools searched the young blonde’s face until they met the quiet green orbs, locking on to them. The words came from her mouth, but the feeling was spoken directly from her heart. "If I had to pick only one Trauma Nurse to work with, Danni, it would be you." The surgeon shifted her gaze, not wanting the nurse to feel uncomfortable. "I guess I fell into the "God Trap" last night."
Squinting, she allowed the wrinkles to play across her nose, "God Trap? I don’t understand."
"In medical school they warned us about "The God Trap", it’s when the doctor feels that the world is revolving around him. That he is the center of all necessary attention." She dropped her head, feeling the guilt of her actions. "My lack of sleep made it easy for me to become confused about who was really the center of attention. It should have been the patient. I’m sorry for rattling my saber so loudly." Looking up into a sea of green, "I’m sorry for everything that I said to you. You didn’t deserve it."
"That’s okay, we both learned from our mistakes."
"Yeah, only I like your version of the word Trauma, more then the one that they taught us."
The blonde raised an eyebrow at this acknowledgement, "How was yours spelled?"
"Well, remember, they were teaching us to be doctors." The tall woman shrugged her shoulders and began, "Tyrannical, Rude, Abrupt, Ubermensch, Meticulous, and Arrogant. That’s what they told us we had to have in order to become a good Trauma Surgeon. Honest!" She quickly crossed her heart, then held her hand up with two fingers crossed.
Seeing the laughter in Danni’s eyes, the surgeon let her smile settle in for good. She marveled at how good it felt to laugh with this person, even if it was just about some silly nonsense phrase. She decided right then and there that it was a feeling that she wanted to have more often.
Garrett was mesmerized as the small slip of a girl let the most beautiful smile come across her face. Her eyes felt as though they were transfixed on that smile for an eternity. Suddenly, the tired surgeon became self-conscious about the reason her friend was smiling. Looking over herself quickly and briefly into the monitor screen to see her own reflection, the surgeon could find nothing out of place. "What…?" Her eyes were searching still for a clue.
"I was just thinking. You’re the best Trauma Surgeon that I know, but you still don’t meet all the designated attributes."
"Huh?" The surgeon felt awkward for the first time in many years. A small amount of color started over the woman’s face as she began to blush.
"It’s just that you’re not rude. I can definitely say that at times you can be tyrannical, abrupt, ubermensch, meticulous, and arrogant, but rude is not one that I’ve seen, at least not just yet."
"Thanks, I think," the surgeon let her eyes roll and ever so slowly let her characteristic lopsided grin show.
Danni closed her eyes and bowed her head in acceptance. "You’re welcome." It was nice to see her friend respond to her in this manner, especially after the words that they had exchanged the night before. She had gone home this morning thinking that all hopes of a friendship with the woman had been thrown right out the window. Now it felt like the bond of their friendship had just grown, tenfold. They had weathered the storm and the outlook ahead was one of clear sailing.
There was a moment of quiet, acceptable peace that both of the women felt comfortable with, their eyes drinking in the other’s warm, silent outpouring of love.
Garrett knew now what it felt like, when she had seen that look so many times on her mother’s face as she watched her children play. It made her a little sad to think that finally, after all these years; she knew just how much her brother and she had been loved.
Not wanting to bring the moment to an end, but realizing that her time was short, Danni hesitantly began to speak. "Did you get my E-mail?"
Shaken out of her thoughts, Garrett cleared her throat. "Yes, I did. I have the entire weekend off so…are you still interested?"
"You better believe I am! Let me plan the weekend, if that’s all right with you, I mean." The young woman waited for approval. "After all, I’m not the one who’s been up and on-call twice this week. Okay?"
"Be my guest," she chuckled. "All that I’m interested in right now is going home and sleeping until tomorrow morning." The surgeon stood up grasped her small duffel bag and daily planner in hand. "Come on, I’ll walk you down to the E.R. on my way out." She tapped her coat pocket in search of her keys and followed the nurse out of the small office.
Seeing her colleague, Dr. Chabot, coming down the hall, she held the door open for him to enter the office. "I’m going home Rene, the office is all yours." She smiled at him politely. "I hope you have a good night."
"Thank you for the kind thought," he tipped his head towards the two women as he passed by and partially entered the open office door. He turned and watched as they made their way down the deserted hall. He studied the relaxed stature of his tall, fellow surgeon and enjoyed the friendly banter that he could hear coming from the pair as they waited for the elevator. A smile slowly crept across his face as his mind thought, ‘Let yourself be open to the thought, my friend, love will find its way in.’ But his whispered words were in his native language, " Ouvre toi a l’idec, mon amie, l’amour trouvera son chemin." He stepped back so as not to be seen watching. "You will see, love always finds a way in," he said under his breath, as he resumed his journey into the office.
*****************
The auburn-haired nurse had just caught up to Karen, as she reached for the door leading into the hospital. "Gee, thanks Mom!" She smiled and walked into the lobby bustling with visitors at this hour.
"Don’t mention it," the older nurse came back with, as she entered the building. Her eyes roamed over the activity of the lobby and stopped dead at the sight of a certain pair coming off of the elevator. "Look!" She tugged at Rosie’s sleeve and once getting her attention, motioned with her chin in the direction of two women. "I hope everything went all right," she whispered.
After watching for a few seconds, she witnessed the close proximity of her two pseudo-daughters. As their steps brought them closer to her, she could hear their gentle banter.
Putting her stern, motherly face on for the occasion, Karen waited only a few seconds before calling out to her fair-haired nurse. "Well, you going to come to work or lollygag with friends all night? Hmmm, young lady?
You’ve got a job to do, you know."
Danni scanned the lobby filled with moving bodies for the source of the familiar voice. Upon seeing Karen and Rosie, both in a crossed-armed glaring stance, the petite nurse could feel the flush rise up her neck and spread across her face. "I should have known it would be you," she aimed her speech at the Charg
e Nurse.
Garrett altered her course to go in their direction, gently nudging Danni along with her. "Hi, Mom, Rosie!" Her voice sounded playful as she continued. "I’d make her be Trauma One for the rest of the week if I were you, Mom," she winked, "especially for the way she bailed out on us last night." The surgeon coughed as Danni slapped her stomach with the backside of her hand.
"That’s enough out of you, my friend." The blonde countered. "It’s time for all good surgeons to go home and get some sleep." Her tone turned full of concern. "Garrett, be careful and call me when you get in, okay?"
"What…" The surgeon looked at the trio of concerned faces staring back at her. "What am I…five or something?" Seeing that she was outnumbered, she tipped her head from side to side, "Oh, all right." She kicked her foot at an imaginary stone, "but I don’t have to like it." She looked at them again and found that each one in their own manner was shooing her towards the door and home. "Okay, I get the picture. See you guys in the morning."
The nurses stood there daring her to head anywhere but home.
"And we’ll be timing you. We know where you live." Rosie voiced as the surgeon turned to walk away. Garrett nodded in assent and raised her free hand to wave weakly, as she walked out through the door and into the chilly fall air.
When the tall surgeon was no longer in sight, the sound of laughter filled the air around the trio of friends.
"I guess she accepted your apology," the older nurse inquired, wiping a tear from her eye.
"Well, we accepted each others’ and decided to learn from our mistakes." She smiled and looked back to where she had last seen her tall friend. "It feels good not being at odds with her." She turned and looked at Karen.
"Thanks, Mom, for your advice."
The Charge Nurse winked at Danni. "Any time, little one." Glancing at the huge clock in the lobby, she attempted to hurry them along. "We’d better get moving or I’m going to have to have a talk with all three of us for being late." With that thought in mind, the three women scurried into the locker room.
*****************
The week passed by rather quickly with each of the roommates anticipating the relaxing weekend awaiting them. Garrett had no idea of what to expect from her friend, but was sure that it would be delightful for them both. After all, Danni had grown up around this part of the country and probably knew some very interesting and picturesque places. The tall surgeon found herself willing to follow her friend just about anywhere, especially if it didn’t have beepers or a paging system involved. She definitely knew that she needed a break from her routine and hoped that this weekend would help her regain control of her life.
It was almost a month now since that night when the past had come rushing headlong back at her. The taunting dreams that crept into her mind while she slept would never let her go on with her life. They always reminded her of her inability to hold on to anyone that she cared for. For the longest time, she had given up and chose not to allow her heart or hopes to be placed on any one person in particular. That had seemed to work for the most part, but proved to take its toll, as the surgeon walled off the exposures of her heart. It had made her a better surgeon, being so independent of others and able to stand on her own two feet when those around her seemed to be floundering. But the skills that she lacked because of it would take a long time to nurture.
She had thought enough about her past. It was time to live in the present and dream of the future instead. With that thought in her mind, Garrett threw back the covers and greeted the new day. The chill of the early morning air inside of the house exhilarated her as she made her way around her room, taking the time to cover her naked form with her long silk robe as she headed toward the bathroom.
The small blonde was already busy in the kitchen getting things ready for the day that she had planned. By the time she was done packing the cooler with the necessary supplies, the tall surgeon was standing in the doorway dressed and ready to go. Looking up from her position seated on top of the large cooler, the nurse first noticed that she was being watched. "Hey! You been standing there long?"
"Just long enough to see you sit on the lid to get it to close." She shook her head in disbelief. "I hope that is not just for lunch." She teased the small woman, knowing her ravenous appetite.
"Nope, it’s our food for the weekend, two lunches, one dinner and one breakfast." She fastened the latch on the cooler to keep it closed.
"I take it we are spending the weekend somewhere that food is not easily obtained," she questioned.
The blonde woman lifted her head from her task and winked at her friend. "You’re just going to have to come along for the ride to find out, now aren’t you?" A sly smile shone across her face. She stepped back and looked at the cooler. "Hey, Gar…do you think we could take your Blazer? I don’t think this is going to fit in my car."
"Sure, but you are going to direct me, aren’t you?" She teased. "Do I need to take anything with me? Clothes, toiletries, anything in particular?"
Danni stood beaming, "Nope, already taken care of. I hope you don’t mind, but I packed your stuff yesterday when you were at work."
One dark eyebrow of the raven-haired woman rose at this tidbit of information. "So let me get this straight. I’m driving my Blazer to some place I don’t know, taking enough food to feed a small army, wearing outfits that you have chosen for me, leaving myself at your mercy for an entertaining weekend, and that’s suppose to help me to relax. Right?"
Nodding her head up and down emphatically, "Yep, you got it."
Garrett shrugged her shoulders. Putting her complete trust in the younger woman, she stated, "Sounds like a plan to me."
******************
Garrett felt like she was on shore leave, setting her sights for new and foreign lands as she made her way up the twisted road. The scenery was beautiful and intrigued her just as much as any port that she had seen during her time in the Navy. The only thing that was different was that, for the first time in her adult life, she was sharing the ride and looking forward to sharing the entire weekend of living and laughing with someone that she could call "friend." It was funny now, but the word no longer brought a dreaded fear to her. Instead, it felt like a breath of fresh air that had seeped into her world.
Stealing glances as she drove, she saw glimpses of the awed expression on her companion’s face as each turn in the road opened up another new world of color and whimsical fantasy in the showcase that Mother Nature was presenting to their very eyes.
Even though the young woman had planned out the course of travel the beautiful colors and her good fortune to pick the peak time for viewing, the seasonal changing of the foliage stunned her. Danni silently thanked the gods who were watching over her and her ‘Amazon,’ for not only giving them this beautiful and wondrous day to enjoy, but for allowing their friendship to weather the storm that had swept over them in such a fury.
The petite nurse had opened her heart to many of the doctors as they drifted through her work area during the course of their duties as interns, residents, and or fellows, but none had ever touched her in such a way as this one in particular. It was as if she had some hidden bond with the tall surgeon, tying the two together.
"So, we almost there?"
The question brought her back from her revelry. She looked down at the piece of paper in her hand, her eyes going over the cryptic notes that were scribbled on it. "Yep," she agreed, "just one more turn and we should be there."
"Is that turn in this state or the next?" Garrett teased her companion.
"Hey, you were the one that wanted to be far away from any beeper or paging system. I can’t help it if this was how far we had to go to get out of the hospital’s range." The blonde’s retort was filled with easy flowing laughter. "I think that’s it! Up there on the left, where the sign is." Her attention was directed from the road, as she leaned forward again, checking the note. The Blazer moved steadily forward as the seconds clicked by, each one bringing them closer
to their destination. With an assured smile on her face, Danni pointed to the small dirt road just passed the sign saying, "Turn here."
The surgeon studied the rutted, dirt path that her friend had been calling a road, as she stopped before crossing the two lane black top to turn onto it. "Hmmm…I can see why taking my SUV made good sense. Hang on, it looks like it maybe a little bumpy."
The half-mile trek on the trail had been well worth it. There, ahead of them, in an area of cleared out trees, was a small cabin nestled into the midst of the forest. Pulling up to the structure, Danni was eager to get out, undoing her seatbelt before the vehicle had come to a complete stop. Her eyes flashed with the light of recognition, as she surveyed her surroundings. "It hasn’t changed one bit. It’s just like I remembered it," she declared. She opened the passenger door and sprang from the seat. She ran up to the porch steps and turned around with both her arms outstretched.
The sight of the young woman, her blonde hair being tussled by the breeze and an incredible smile showing from her radiant face, made the surgeon think she was intruding upon some long-lost, private memory. The surgeon’s keen eyesight followed the dancing figure as it glided from one point to the next, spinning and laughing until she finally stood very still and hugged herself, trying to hold on to those things she had just experienced in her mind.
