by K. Darblyne
She breathed a sigh of relief when the door finally met its frame and she could hear the clicking sound of the lock as it fell into place. She looked up to see the face of her friend. At first her expression was one of being startled then it gradually changed for the better, showing that trademark lopsided grin of hers. "What?" Danni looked at her for an answer.
"I would have said something stupid in there if it wasn’t for you. Probably would have ruined our chances of ever getting that proposal through to the Board, too."
"Well, let’s just hope that hasn’t already happened." The two looked at each other and started to head out of the waiting room. Once in the hall Danni started to giggle, trying to hide it behind her hand.
"What’s so funny?" Garrett stopped, placing her hands on her hips for emphasis.
"I was just thinking." She reached up and cupped the surgeon’s shoulder. "We make a pretty good team. You had to push me into his office, while I had to pull you out of it." Her eyes flickered with the laughter in her voice. "You can’t get any closer to team work than that, now can you?"
The surgeon thought for a moment then answered. "No, I guess you can’t." She nodded in agreement, "Thanks."
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As fast as the days that they worked together on the proposal had passed by, the days waiting to hear of its approval dragged ever so slowly by. The hospital staff was all caught up in a state of anticipation for the upcoming holiday on Thursday. Even Danni seemed to be excited about it as she prepared her offering for the Thanksgiving feast to come. She had labored with love over the Pumpkin Roll Desert she was preparing for the next day, trying as she might to forget about the Board Meeting that was going on. There was nothing more she could do to get the proposal passed than she had already done. It was all up to the fates now.
She thought about her family and how lucky they were to be able to spend time together. Her siblings would be there and of course, her parents. She had tried to talk her roommate into going with her but sensed her desire not to dampen anyone else’s holiday. Her excuse being that she was working so that Rene could be with his new family. ‘If only I could get her to realize that she’s part of a family too.’ The nurse set about making that idea become a reality. After a few quick phone calls, she was smiling again. Her plan was being put into motion.
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It was going to be another one of those family holidays that Dr. Trivoli shied away from, always volunteering to work for someone else so that they could enjoy it. The truth of the matter was that she had no one to enjoy it with, let alone be thankful. Her only feeling of belonging was her work and there is where she chose to be as she had for all of her adult life.
‘Why should this year be any different?’ she mused sitting in front of the window overlooking the helipad. She couldn’t even get excited about work, there wasn’t any. Sure, there were still patients on the floors and in the units to take care of, but nothing that would get her mind off the outcome of the Board Meeting the night before. The Ol’ Cutter hadn’t gotten in touch with her yet about the Board’s decision. She had to assume that their proposal had been rejected.
The weather had turned colder now and the small flakes of snow coming down seemed to glisten in the late afternoon sun, the wind swirling them around and around on their way toward the ground. She stared out into nothing, yet her eyes looked at everything that came into view.
There, in the distance was a small figure trudging across the parking area, its form bundled tightly with heavy clothing and its arms laden with boxes and bags. The swirling snow sticking to it as it moved closer. The surgeon’s mind drifted briefly to that small snow globe of her youth as the images outside stirred her memory to life. She tried to place it but there was no larger figure coming into view.
She watched as each step brought it nearer to the hospital and her. When the figure had reached the illuminated helipad, Garrett sensed that she was familiar with the form. Straining her eyes against the falling snow she tried to make out who the person was. ‘I swear that looks like Danni.’ She blinked and looked again, seeing a tassel of blonde hair coming out from underneath the knit cap and for a brief second their eyes met. ‘It is Danni!’
Garrett was up in a flash, making her way to the trauma bay doors leading to the helipad. Without any concern for the cold and snow, the surgeon went outside, meeting her friend halfway. Relieving her of some of the packages, the surgeon was puzzled by her presence. "Why are you here? You’re supposed to be at a family dinner."
Danni pulled at the scarf that was covering her mouth, "I decided to be with my real family. The ones that accept me for who I am, not just because I share their blood." She smiled and nodded toward the door. "Besides, who else was going to bring dinner."
The surgeon shivered as the wind swept the clinging snow into her thin scrub attire, the white lab coat acting like a magnet for the snow. "Jeez, it’s colder out here then I thought. Let’s get inside."
The several minutes that it had taken for them to get to the door was more than enough to cover the two women with snow, causing them to look very much like two snow people, one small snow-covered figure with a larger one right beside it matching step for step. Mom stood at the door, watching as they came nearer. ‘If I didn’t know better, I’d say that might make a nice snow globe scene.’ She mused, ‘Wonder if I should mention it to them?’ When they were a few steps away, Karen triggered the automatic door to open.
The two snow-covered forms stepped inside trying to shed the remnants of the snow squall from their bodies. Karen watched with awe her two pseudo-daughters, as they slowly warmed up not only to the temperature inside but to each other with their quiet bantering.
"Jesus, Mary and Joseph!" The older nurse was blessing herself. "What are you trying to do, give our Trauma Fellow a death of a cold?" She shook her head with her hands perched on top of her hips, her right foot tapping to some unknown melody. "You’d think you two were some little street urchins the way you get into trouble." Her voice was now strained as she tried to keep from laughing. "Hey, Rosie!" She called out. "Look what the wind just blew into our midst."
"Yeah, I see that." Rosie had just turned the corner, coming down from the trauma hallway. "Its about time, I’m starved. One of those boxes better have a turkey in it."
"Come on, let’s get dinner set up." Danni shook her clothing one last time before she started down the hall. "If we’re lucky, it should still be warm enough to eat." She looked behind her at the surprised surgeon.
"You had this planned, didn’t you?" Garrett let Rosie slide some of the bags from out of her arms, then stepped lively to follow behind the spirited blonde.
"Yep! From nuts to desert." Danni led the way into the already prepared secluded exam room. "We’re a family here. Whether you like it or not, you’re now part of it."
"But…but…" Garrett stammered.
"No buts about it, Doc. I’ve…er…we’ve adopted you, just like everyone else in our little family here."
Karen looked at the surgeon challengingly. "You better learn to accept it. We’re even worse come the real family holidays. Don’t even think about trying to get out of those celebrations." She winked at the surgeon just to prove that her bark was worse than her bite.
"All right, but you could have at least let me contribute something to this meal." Garrett was slowly resigning herself to the idea of this adoptive family.
"Oh, but you are contributing, Doc. Who do you think is going to carve up this wonderful bird?" Mom stepped back from the table with a large carving knife in her hand, presenting it to the surgeon. "Since you’re the newest member of our family here," she looked at the motley crew of the E.R. staff, "it’s your honor to offer up a prayer in our behalf and then use those surgical skills of yours and carve away."
A look of panic flashed across the surgeon’s face. Sure, she would have no problem slicing up the turkey, but she wasn’t accustomed to praying. How was she going to do it now, i
n front of everyone assembled there? She could feel the spittle in her mouth turning to paste. ‘Why me? Why not…’ She looked up into Danni’s gaze like a deer that was caught in headlights.
"Mom, I wouldn’t mind doing the prayer for Garrett." Danni’s voice was strong. "I’m sure that I’ve had more practice than the good doctor here."
"Next holiday, Garrett." Mom warned her, shaking her finger. "You’re not getting off the hook that easy." Then she turned to the petite nurse. "Okay, Danni, let’s get this going before everybody else’s dinner is over."
Danni looked around the assembled group of doctors, nurses, aides, technologists, housekeepers, and security personnel. One thing drew her attention as all the different shades of skin hues had come together on this holiday to give medical coverage to the rest of the world as they celebrated at home with their families. ‘Medicine truly is a diversified field! No one country or ethnic group or gender is in control of it.’
The petite nurse bowed her head and the group followed suit, anxious to move on to the food. After collecting her thoughts for a moment, Danni began her prayer of thanksgiving for all of those gathered.
"Lord, look down upon us, your servants. Whether we are here to learn or to teach, it is in your name that we serve the sick and injured. In this time of global communication, we are thankful that you have chosen us to learn from one another, to act in friendship and fellowship. Both technology and our strong will to reach out to each other have breached the barriers that have kept us distant from one another in the past, isolated in a world of our own. For this, we are truly thankful."
Garrett let the words sink in, knowing that they were especially meant for her. She raised her eyes to view the tiny blonde that was making landmark changes in her life.
She didn’t hear the rest of the prayer, as her mind took off on it’s own tangent. The past suddenly became
intermingled with the present. Scenes came back to her of her brother Lucas, but were suddenly superimposed
with those of Danni in his place. Her mind raced with thoughts of the snow globe and what her parents had
told her.
Her parents had given the globe to her. It was their way of explaining the bond that was to fill her life. The two snowmen inside of the globe stood side by side, one slightly larger than the other. They had told her about an unseen bond between the two figures. Her mother knelt down behind her to wrap her arms around the young girl. Pointing to the snowstorm of activity inside the globe, she commented that the two snowmen were held together in their strength for each other and that nothing could separate the bond they shared, not even the cold, harsh winds of the snowstorm. At times it was hard to see the figures, but then, the snow would die down and there the two were, standing side by side, as if nothing had ever happened. The small child wondered which snowman she was. The girl looked up to her mother for confirmation of the choice. She was hugged gently as her mother whispered, "You are the older and bigger one, my love."
Then she thought of how Danni had looked when she viewed her through the window not less than half an hour ago.
The weather had turned colder now and the small flakes of snow coming down seemed to glisten in the late afternoon sun, the wind swirling them around and around on their way toward the ground. There, in the distance was a small figure trudging across the parking area, its form bundled tightly with heavy clothing and its arms laden with boxes and bags. The swirling snow sticking to it as it moved closer. The surgeon’s mind drifted briefly to that small snow globe of her youth as the images outside stirred her memory to life. She remembered looking down at the both of them thinking how they resembled the snowmen of her globe by the time they entered the trauma bay doors. She, of course, was the large one.
‘No, It’s just my body trying to warm up from being outside. I’m just trying to think too hard, making some sense of things.’ She shook her head and looked once more at the demure nurse deep in her thoughts. Before she realized it, another scene stole into her thoughts.
The silences of the moment allowed a fleeting glimpse of a tasseled-haired boy come to Garrett’s mind. His youthful features covered with a smattering of sweat and dirt as he laughed, holding up his prize catch, a rainbow trout.
Garrett’s mind recalled the joy of fishing in her younger sibling, then twisted and turned until the tasseled-haired boy turned into a petite blonde.
"If we hurry, we’ll have time to hike down to the lake," the small blonde offered. "You like to fish?" Her eyebrows jumped up and down in anticipation.
"Fish? Yeah, I like to fish." The surgeon stopped, thinking back to the last time that she had been fishing. A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth.
"Do you think we could do just a little fishing today, I mean, the two of us?" Garrett looked at the petite woman, hope written all over her face.
Speechless, the blonde hair moved freely on top of the nodding head, while a dazzling smile swept across her face. Her voice was unsteady at first, taken back by the emotion of the moment. "Sure thing! I’ll get the rods and gear."
Her thoughts were wild with abandon now, drawing more to her attention.
There were so many times that she felt like this, when the combined effort of some plan that she and her brother put into action had turned into one of accomplishment. Often it had come as a surprise to her parents. When all was said and done, her brother would always reach up, cupping her shoulder in victory, while communicating as only close siblings do, with a meeting of the eyes.
Then the surgeon’s mind flashed to earlier this week, bringing the petite blonde back into the picture.
"I was just thinking." She reached up and cupped the surgeon’s shoulder. "We make a pretty good team. You had to push me into his office, while I had to pull you out of it." Her eyes flickered with the laughter in her voice. "You can’t get any closer to team work than that, now can you?"
Her mind was changing its stance. Reasoning was giving way to wanting it to be so. She had loved her brother and missed that bond of fellowship. She thought about how easy it was to talk to him, to tell him of her dreams and what was eating at her soul. ‘If only I could have him back. I’d never let go of that fellowship again.’
The image of the dimly lit cabin came floating back into her mind. The warmth of the tea and the fire as she spilled her soul out for Danni to see. Now that she thought about it, she wasn’t sure that it wasn’t Danni’s presence that had warmed her, not the other sources. That night had been like a breath of fresh air to her soul. One that it had needed and waited on for a long time, like the birth of a long awaited child.
Garrett’s mind flashed to the night Rene’s babies was born.
"Oh, I see." There was silence for a moment of reverent thought before the young nurse spoke. "You know, they say that when one spirit leaves this earth, another one comes to take its place." She shrugged her shoulders. "Life goes on."
"Hmm…interesting thought, Danni. Interesting in a lot of ways." Garrett wondered who would be the one to take over the place that was vacated in her life. She’d have to give this concept more thought when she had the time.
Her eyes flashed brightly with the final realization, ‘Could it be? Could this blonde nurse be the one to replace my brother in my life?’ Her gaze falling upon Danni’s as she ended her prayer. The life that shown forth in that moment was phenomenal, her blue eyes twinkling in delight. ‘Have you been trying to show this to me the entire time?’ She thought of her brother and knew it to be true. "I love you," she whispered under her breath knowing that the one it was meant for would hear.
Danni raised her head with the final word of her prayer, "Amen." Her gaze falling upon the vision of a dark-haired woman, holding a large sharp object in front of her. There was something about her eyes that made the nurse take a closer look. She could see that the fiery blue crystals had come to life. ‘They’re twinkling like they are full of life. I’ve never seen her so alive before. I wonder if it was something that I said.�
�� The nurse tried to think what it could have been, but the same nagging image kept coming into her head. ‘Jeez, why would that darn journal of mine pop into my thoughts now of all times?’
Then her thoughts took in the periphery of her vision and she saw the glistening edge of the carving knife, recalling her first time in trauma with Garrett to mind.
Looking across her patient, Danni could see the dark-haired surgeon standing with the Trocar clenched in both hands. Danni’s mind thought back to her dream, startling the young nurse. Her eyes opened wider as she looked at the surgeon poised, ready to send the long blunt tipped rod into the patient’s side. The surgeon began the insertion of the chest tube, her face taut with concentration; the confident blue eyes focused on the job at hand. All of a sudden there was a feeling of Déjà vu, as a chill ran down the young nurse’s spine. It was an all too familiar scene but something was missing. Everything seemed so mechanical and devoid of emotion that it reminded Danni of a cyberspace movie. Her mind recalling her dream almost instantly, flashing it across her brain.
