by GG Shalton
Amelia spent most of her time sitting in a chair in the nursery—a small chamber beside her room. She painted pictures of ducks and ponies on the walls with bright colors. Mrs. Palmer purchased paint for her when there were leftover household funds, and she was grateful for the housekeeper’s kindness.
Amelia stacked the bookshelves with a few children’s books she received from Mrs. Palmer. Once she knew if it was a girl or boy, she could decorate more. Mrs. Palmer made her a few baby blankets and gave her two baby gowns. Their friendship grew as Amelia depended on her good graces and advice during her pregnancy. Mrs. Palmer raised two brothers and three sisters outside of Glasgow. Her mother had taken ill with fever and never recovered. Her father had died in a carriage accident. All her siblings were married, and she found a job as a housekeeper after she was widowed at the age of eight and twenty. She never had children but helped deliver many of her nieces and nephews. Amelia would be happy to have her around when she delivered her own baby.
A few weeks before the doctor said she was due Amelia started having sharp pains. She notified the housekeeper and a doctor was promptly called. Her heart rate increased and sweat beaded against her forehead as she braced for more pain. It was relentless, and she felt the pain would be more than she could bear. Falling into unconsciousness, she willed the pain away through tears and screams.
Andrew’s carriage pulled up in front of the cottage and was accompanied by Brian and many guards. He had arranged for them to stay at the inn in town but wanted to check on Amelia. Her due date was close and the last letter he received was that she was experiencing some difficulty with swelling and mobility. He hid his concerns and replied with indifference when anyone asked about her upcoming birth. Rumors whispered throughout the staff regarding the status of Andrew’s marriage.
One of the footmen came to the door as Andrew opened it. “Mr. Baird! They are with her now.”
A look of concern crossed Andrew’s face. “What has happened?”
The housemaid went down the stairs carrying a few towels with evidence of blood. Eyeing Mr. Baird, she hesitated and replied, “The other doctor is examining her.”
His chest felt heavy and the walls felt as they were closing in on him. Why did the sheets have blood on them? Struggling to keep the panic out of his voice, he asked, “Why? Is she ill?”
Mrs. Palmer came down the stairs with a stoic expression. Recognizing Andrew, she stopped her descent and addressed him. “Mr. Baird? I am glad you are here, Amelia went into labor this morning a few weeks early. The doctor has been with her for several hours and is worried about her. She is not doing well and keeps losing consciousness. He said it is the loss of blood and if she doesn’t deliver soon…”
His heart pounded against his chest “The baby?”
Mrs. Palmer looked away distressed. “I do not know. He sent a footman earlier for another doctor he knows that could help. He is with her now.”
Andrew walked past her up the stairs and stood outside Amelia’s bedroom door. He overheard the doctor’s low voices discussing Amelia like she wasn’t in the room. He opened the door, “Doctors? I am Mr. Baird.”
The older doctor pushed his spectacles up the bridge of his nose. “Mr. Baird, we meet at last. I wish it were under better circumstances. I am Dr. Carlyle, and this is my associate Dr. Brenham. May we speak outside?”
Andrew nodded and stepped out of the room with the doctors. He watched the doctor take in a deep breath finding it difficult to look him in the eye. “Mr. Baird, there is no easy way to say this. Your wife is in grave danger. If she doesn’t deliver soon, she may die. She is bleeding and the baby is breech. It happens sometimes when the baby is early and has not turned yet. Dr. Brenham has some experience of this in his past. His mother was a midwife and he will try to turn the baby. She is exhausted and in extreme pain. We are getting her ready for the procedure and will leave you a few moments alone with your wife.”
On the outside Andrew hid his emotions, but inside his stomach was twisting. He hated and loved her at the same time. The doctors left him alone and he entered the room eyeing her unmoving body on the bed. Afraid she was unconscious, he took a few steps toward the bed and saw her eyes open slowly, a look of confusion showed on her face. “Andrew?” The weakness in her voice made his chest constrict. She looked frail and had lost all color. Sweat had drenched her hair and her eyes drooped.
“Don’t talk, Amelia. You need to save your strength. The doctors are going to try to save you and the baby.” He sat on the bed next to her.
Amelia’s eyes filled with tears. “Andrew, please listen to me.”
He looked away and felt her hand touch his. Surprised she would touch him, he swallowed his pride and gripped her hand looking in her eyes seeing pain and desperation.
She whispered, “I know you hate me.”
He sat in shock watching her close her eyes struggling with her voice.
“But please don’t tell the baby I was a bad person. Please tell my baby good stories about me.” She was losing her breath between sobs and her face contorted with pain.
Andrew found it hard to speak. “Amelia…”
She shook her head. “No, please listen.” She tried to sit up moaning in pain. “I don’t think I will live through this, Andrew. It hurts so terribly. But I want our baby to survive. I told the doctor to save the baby. But before I die, I need you to know the truth. And I hope you can forgive me one day.”
Andrew wanted her to rest, but finally hearing the truth piqued his curiosity. Pushing aside his selfishness, he replied, “Amelia, please save your strength.”
She cried out grabbing his hand tighter and shifting in the bed. “No. Please listen to me. I wanted to hate you. I thought you were like my father and I never gave you a chance because my heart was closed.” Sobs slurred her speech as she tried to catch her breath. “I was wrong.” Her eyes closed and then there was silence.
He thought she fell asleep. But after a moment she took a deep breath struggling to speak. “You are a good husband. So gentle and you showed me so much kindness. I wanted you to know that I didn’t mean the words I told you that day. I liked your touch. Please forgive me, Andrew.” Her voice was strained and she let out a moan.
Andrew couldn’t take seeing her in pain any longer and stood up taking his hand away from her grip. “Amelia, we must get the doctor.”
She closed her eyes losing consciousness again.
Andrew stood over her unable to leave. Years of hiding his emotions had not prepared him for this. Taking a moment, he reached over and kissed her on the forehead. She was asleep. Emotions weighed heavily on his chest, and he whispered, “You are my heart, Amelia.” He walked out the door, so the doctors could check on her.
The servants brought up a few chairs and Brian joined him outside of her room. Bull brought up some brandy and sat with them beside her door. It was hard for Andrew to speak. “You may both go to the inn. It will be a long night.”
They watched five servants enter the room to help the doctors. Andrew could hear her moaning loudly.
Brian put his hand on his shoulder. “I am here for the night. I won’t leave you.”
Bull shook his head. “Neither will I.”
Andrew ran his fingers through his hair. “I have never felt so helpless.”
Brian raised his brow. “Did you speak to her?”
Andrew nodded his head unable to speak. His thoughts turned to her last words.
Screams shook the men and Andrew stood up reaching for the door. Brian grabbed his shoulder. “Let the doctor’s do their job. You can’t help her.”
Andrew dropped his head to his chest. His sadness turned to anger, and he punched a hole in the wall. Brian took his handkerchief and wrapped his bloody hand. “You won’t be any good to her if you don’t keep calm. She will need you.”
> Andrew’s face was red and he grabbed Brian’s collar. “Need me? What if she dies?”
Brian took his hand away and embraced him. It was a display of affection foreign to the men. “I know we are not the most religious men, but maybe we can ask someone from the church to visit?”
Mrs. Palmer came out of the room visibly shaken and out of breath. “Mr. Baird, the doctor asked me to tell you that the baby has turned. Amelia is ready to deliver. It could be a long night and he recommends you get some rest.”
Andrew took a deep breath. “How is she? I heard her screaming.”
Mrs. Palmer tried to reassure him. “The doctor said the procedure of turning the baby is more painful than delivery for a lot of women. She is exhausted and fainted from the pain. He needs to revive her to push the baby out.”
Andrew looked at Brian. “She is so frail. How much more can she take?”
Brian handed him a glass of brandy. “She is young and strong. You must believe she will be okay.”
Mrs. Palmer pressed her lips together. “The maids have been praying for her. We believe that she will come through this.”
Andrew took a seat looking down at the floor. “If you could give me a few moments alone.”
Brian motioned for the group to leave. He looked back at Andrew. “We will be downstairs. If you hear anything let us know.” Andrew nodded not looking at this friend.
Andrew’s mind raced with thoughts and suppressed feelings for his wife. He tried to block out the moans and cries coming from the room. At least he knew she was alive when he could hear her. He longed to hold her and give her comfort. The hate in his heart was melting, and only his pride kept him from declaring to her how he felt.
“Mr. Baird!” The doctor’s voice rang out.
Andrew was disoriented and realized he had fallen asleep in the chair. He stood up quickly almost knocking the doctor over. “Forgive me for falling asleep. How is she?”
The doctor smiled. “You have a son, and he is doing fine. They are cleaning him up now.”
Andrew’s heart busted with joy—yet a nagging feeling came over him. “How is my wife?”
The doctor tilted his head. “She is resting and will be the rest of the day. I gave her a hefty dose of sleeping medicine. Amelia suffered some bleeding. But we believe we got it stopped. Dr. Brenham is quite versed in women’s health and believes she will recover. She will be very sore and weak for a few days and I recommend bed rest.” He patted him on the back. “And I recommend you get some bed rest too.”
Andrew smiled. “Thank you, Doctor.” The door opened and one of the maids held a small baby swaddled in a blue blanket. She handed the baby to Andrew. He gently took him and kissed his forehead. “Oh, my son. You are a little fighter.”
Brian came up the stairs with Bull. “Congratulations. Baby Baird has made his arrival.” Brian touched the baby’s toes. “Aren’t you a handsome one?” They smiled ear to ear cooing at him. “What name have you for him?”
Andrew shrugged. “I will speak to Amelia when she wakes. If you will excuse me, I want to see her.”
Andrew entered the room as two women servants were cleaning up the mess. The doctor was checking her heart. She laid still in a deep sleep. Her hair was knotted, and her face was pale. The doctor smiled. “Her heart is strong, and the bleeding has not come back. I will check on her tomorrow. I suggest a wet nurse for a few days until she can regain her strength.”
Andrew looked at the housekeeper. She spoke up at the doctor’s request. “It’s been arranged, and the wet nurse is already downstairs. Mrs. Baird requested not to hire one, but given the circumstances, we will take your direction.”
Andrew looked at her. “Keep the nurse for now until Mrs. Baird has recovered.”
The housekeeper smiled. “May I take him for a while? The wet nurse is in the drawing room waiting for instruction. I will let her know to come up at once.”
Andrew kissed him again and handed him to the housekeeper. “Please bring him back in a few hours. I want Amelia to see him as soon as she wakes.”
The housekeeper smiled. “As you wish.” As she walked out the door, Andrew noticed her wink at Brian who looked away with a smirk on his face.
Chapter 22
Amelia woke up adjusting her eyes to the lighting in the room. She was dizzy and disoriented and felt a bit nauseous. She bent over the bed and was thankful there was a chamber pot on the floor, she let out the contents that were still in her stomach. After recovering and wiping her mouth, she surveyed the room realizing she was alone. Her body felt weak and her legs hurt. Gathering her thoughts, she touched her stomach realizing that she was no longer pregnant and remembered the night before. Where was her baby? She began to call out for a servant and saw that the door to the room was opening. To her surprise, in the doorway stood her husband who held a tiny bundle in his arms.
“You’re awake?” He walked to the bed with relief etched on his face. He sat on the bed and scooted his body next to her causing the bed to dip low. His eyes left hers temporarily to look at the bundle in his arms. He held the baby up for her to see and she felt her face light up with happiness. “The doctors will be happy you woke—you gave the household quite a scare.” He loosened the blanket placing the baby nearer to her face. “You gave birth to a beautiful son.”
Amelia looked down at her beautiful baby with dark hair and pink skin. Her eyes filled with tears as she reached for him. Lifting him up, she held him close to her chest. She let out a coo and closed her eyes, relishing in the baby’s smell.
Andrew could not suppress his joy. Admiration along with joy was all that could describe his elation of having a son. Noticing how vulnerable his wife looked, he offered his arms to take the baby. His lips parted forming a sentiment, but he quickly closed them. He affectionately soothed the baby who was beginning to stir. “We have no name for him.”
Amelia glanced at her son. “Do you have a family name you would like to use?”
Andrew shrugged his shoulders. “Not anyone that I know that would be worthy. I want him to have a strong name. Not Andrew, but something with meaning.”
Amelia thought for a few moments. “What about a king’s name? Edward or Henry?”
Andrew smirked with amusement mixed with a bad taste in his mouth. “Those were English Kings. He needs a strong Scottish name.” He looked down at his son. “What about Robert?”
Amelia narrowed her eyes playfully. “You do remember I am English?” A small chuckled escaped her lips. “No matter, I like the name Robert. But I think he should have a bit of his father in his name. What about Robert Andrew Baird?”
He smiled proudly. “A very strong name indeed.”
There was a knock on the door and the nurse entered. “Forgive me—I didn’t know that Mrs. Baird had awakened yet. It’s time for the baby to eat.”
Amelia’s face straightened showing her unwillingness to let her baby out of her sight. She glanced at Andrew with a look that said she was ready to do battle if necessary. Andrew looked at her reassuringly and handed the baby to the wet nurse, Mrs. Franklin. “Please bring him back once you are finished.”
She left the room and he turned to Amelia. “It’s only until you are feeling better. I hope you understand.”
Amelia bit back a retort. “I am feeling fine.”
Unapologetically, Andrew took a stance. “Amelia, even the doctors said you are not ready to feed Robert. Our decision to have a nurse was based on doctor’s orders.”
Amelia pushed out her bottom lip as if weighing her options. “Andrew, I do understand that he needed nourishment while I was resting. I just hope you understand that I didn’t have a mother growing up. I want to take care of my baby and make sure he knows that I love him. That I will not leave him like my mother left me.”
Andrew stared at her for a moment
before responding. “Amelia, he will know you’re his mother even if you have a nurse help you. I think it’s best to keep one on staff.” He paced the floor in front of her bed.
She didn’t want to argue. “As you wish.”
Andrew snapped his head in surprise at her obedience. Not knowing how to respond to her submissive behavior, he cleared his throat. “Very well. The doctor will be by later today. He insists that you stay in bed for a few days. Your body went through a shock and you will need to regain your strength.”
Amelia stared at him defeated. “I will stay in bed, but I do want my baby to stay with me for a while.”
Andrew agreed. “Of course. If you will excuse me, I have some business to attend too.”
Andrew found Brian and a few others in the drawing room. They all congratulated him again. After a briefing on the day’s agenda, they left for the inn, so they could meet with a few business associates. Andrew wanted to keep Amelia’s residence free from any unsavory men who asked for a meeting.
Andrew met with some of his men upon his arrival at the inn. Congratulations and well-wishers for the new father went around the group, and their smiles were contagious. Mr. Bradley was waiting in the dining parlor and asked Andrew to have a private luncheon with him. A few well-dressed men from London were accompanying him and they had waited all night for his return.
“Forgive me. My delay could not be avoided. My son came a few weeks early. My wife was in labor last night.”
Mr. Bradley raised his brow. “A likely excuse.” He laughed loudly echoing across the room. “I am jesting and wish you the best. I didn’t realize you were married until recently. She must be a remarkable woman to be married to the famous Black Baird and for you to return my precious gift the night of my dinner party.”
