He grinned. “Sweating already, baby?”
Those glorious eyes widened slightly, and he saw knowledge in them. Yeah, she knew this would end only one way. They’d been dancing around each other for weeks now. He’d backed off his advances, giving her time to breathe, to think. Telling himself the next move needed to be hers. The waiting had been harder than he’d anticipated, but he was glad he’d waited. No way in hell had he coerced her. She’d made this move on her own. And now, no matter who won this bout, he intended for both of them to come out supremely satisfied.
They circled each other silently, tension thickening with every second. If she looked below his waist, there would be no question of what was on his mind. He was rock hard. The thought of touching her firm, smooth flesh, of putting his tongue on those tight nipples, of sliding between her thighs into her hot, sweet body put him on the point of explosion.
It shouldn’t have surprised him that she attacked first. If he hadn’t been so immersed in his fantasy, he would have been better prepared. As it was, when she nimbly jumped and kicked his shoulder, it was all he could do to keep his balance. Righting himself quickly, his grin grew broader. “Score one for you. Now, let’s play.”
He went after her, ready to tackle her and bring her to the floor. She jumped out of his way, whirled, and managed a stinging punch to his stomach. Eli grunted, laughed again, and threw out a leg, tripping her. She fell onto the mat, and he was on top of her in a flash.
She heaved her body, trying to buck him off. When that didn’t work, she wrapped her legs around him and tried to twist, to turn him over. Eli laughed again and did what he’d been dreaming about for what seemed like forever. Pushing her arms above her head, he loomed over her and kissed her.
The instant Eli’s mouth touched hers, she stopped struggling. Kathleen had known where this was headed, and while the rational, self-protective part of her screamed dire warnings of impending heartache, she shushed them and went with what her heart, soul, her very being wanted. This man, this beautiful, exasperating, honorable, sexy as hell man, was what she wanted, needed…had been searching forever for. And he was hers. His intent was clear—he would take her. And her intent was just as clear—she would take him, too.
Though her arms were still stretched above her head, she could still use her legs. And since they were already wrapped around him, she made it easy for them both by spreading her legs wider and wrapping them around his hips. When his hard length settled against her sex, she moaned against his mouth. Never had anything felt so good…so damn delicious.
Opening her mouth, she welcomed his tongue, reveled in his taste, in his mastery of how to kiss like no one had ever kissed her. Eli kissed like it mattered. As if he were already making love to her, already inside her. He kissed with purpose.
Arousal swelled within her, and she became a writhing, wanton, needy creature who wanted only one thing. This man…her man, inside her.
Panting slightly, Eli pulled away from her luscious mouth to look down at her. Never had he seen anyone lovelier, more desirable. Eyes glittering with heat and need, she gazed up at him with approval, but beneath that, he also saw vulnerability, fear. He knew the fear had nothing to do with him physically and everything to do with her heart. When this need was sated, Eli swore he would get to the bottom of that worry. But for now…for now, this was what they both needed.
Using one hand, he shoved her top up, revealing small, gorgeous breasts. Groaning, he dropped his mouth onto a raspberry-colored nipple and suckled hard. She screamed softly and jerked upward, causing his cock to press deeper into her sex. Growling his frustration at the clothing impeding their final connection, he rolled away from her. Before she could react, he was pulling her shorts down and flinging them across the room. She surprised him by pushing him onto his back and straddling his knees. Hooking her fingers into his pants, she pulled them down, freeing him.
Eli kicked off his pants, rolled her back onto the mat, and came over her again. They were both breathing heavily, their mouths raking across each other’s skin, their hands grabbing, caressing.
Looking down at her, he checked once more to make sure she was still onboard, that this was still what she wanted. When he saw the acceptance in her expression, he knew there was no going back for either of them. This moment, this first time, was more than sex, more than the need to connect or satisfy an urge. This was commitment in its most elemental form. She was his…he was hers. It was as simple, as basic, as that.
Pushing her legs farther apart, Eli thrust deep.
She came on a scream. Bright, blinding lights exploded behind her closed eyes, and her entire body took flight, soaring like a rocket. Her face buried in Eli’s hard shoulder, her arms tight around his firm, damp body, Kathleen exulted in the most outrageous pleasure she’d ever experienced.
“Kat?”
“Yes?”
“Okay?”
“Oh yes.”
“Ready to go again?”
Before she could explain that there was no way her body could experience an ounce more pleasure, he was proving her wrong. With short, fast thrusts, followed by long, hard plunges that reached deep inside her. Kathleen felt pleasure spiraling up all over again. Her hands tightening on his back, her fingers digging into his skin, an orgasm, stronger than the one before, approached.
“Eli. Eli. Eli,” she whispered as she plunged over a cliff and once again flew into glorious, mind-blowing ecstasy.
With an animalistic groan that sounded both tortured and exultant, he shouted her name, and she felt him pulse inside her as he came.
They were still panting, his body only beginning to come down from the incredible high it had just experienced, when he felt her pulling away from him. Not physically. They were still wrapped around each other. Their damp skin almost glued them together. He was still inside her, softening but continuing to nestle within her warmth. But she was retreating from him all the same.
Raising his head, he looked into her eyes and confirmed his thoughts. The regret was there, and behind that, the fear had returned. He was determined to confront them both.
“Talk to me.”
“This isn’t a good time to talk.”
He barked a laugh. “It’s the best time. We’re connected, as close as two people can be. We can’t hide from each other. Tell me what’s on your mind.”
“Very well. I…” She closed her eyes briefly and when she opened them, they were swimming in tears.
“What, sweetheart? Tell me.”
“This shouldn’t have happened,” she whispered. “I realize I instigated it, but I—”
“You instigated it? I think we can both take credit for that. And I totally disagree that it shouldn’t have happened. In fact, I think it should’ve happened a long time ago.”
She shook her head. “No.” Pushing at him lightly, she said, “Let me up.”
“Not until we’ve talked this out. Every time I try to get you to talk to me, you walk away. Not today. Tell me what’s wrong. What are you afraid of?”
“I just can’t have a relationship with you, Eli.”
“Too bad, baby, we already have one.”
“No, I mean…yes, of course we have a relationship. But we can’t have a…a…an intimate relationship.”
“That’s exactly what we have, Kat.” He pressed into her and hardened, stirring to life inside her. “What the hell do you call this?”
She released a small moan of pleasure and then shook her head. “This…this was just…”
“What?” Eli fought it, but the anger was setting in, erasing the incredible pleasure. “Tell me what you think this just was.”
“Sex.”
“You’ve never been a liar, Kat. Don’t start now. No way was this just sex.”
“Then what was it?” she challenged.
“This was two people making a commitment to each other in the most elemental way possible.”
Her eyes went wide with horror. “No.” She shove
d at his shoulders. “No, Eli. Let me up.”
Eli eased out of her, gritting his teeth at the residual pleasure. He sprang to his feet, now angrier than he’d been before. Grabbing their clothes that he’d flung across the room, he dropped hers beside her. “Deny all you want, Kathleen. Pretend you don’t feel anything. Act like you just enjoyed a casual fuck. I know different. And you damn well do, too.”
Turning his back on her, he slid into his pants and stalked away. If he stayed, he’d say things he would regret. Having their first time together turn into an argument sure as hell hadn’t been in his plans.
Chapter Thirty-four
Kennedy took another sip of her iced herbal tea, hoping it would settle her queasiness. She’d read somewhere that being sick past the first trimester was a good sign of a healthy baby. If that were true, then this darling one would be the healthiest baby born in Texas. Which, despite the discomfort, was just fine with her. She’d gladly put up with nine months of nausea to have a healthy, happy baby.
She took another sip and then squinted at the computer screen. Her eyes were a little bleary, but something about this particular news piece had caught her attention. A niggling thought at the back of her mind made her keep coming back to it.
She twisted her neck to relieve the tension and then smiled as Nick came up behind her and began to knead her shoulders. She let her approving moan tell him he had hit the right spot.
He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and then sat down beside her. “How about we call it an early day? Start fresh tomorrow.”
She glanced at the open door. “It’s only a little after three. Kathleen and Eli will be—”
She stopped when he shook his head, a little smile playing around his beautiful mouth.
“What?”
“I went looking for Eli. Figured after his revelations today, he might need someone to talk to. Knowing him, I thought he might head to the gym to work out some of that anger.”
“And?”
“Let’s just say I stood outside the door and listened for about ten seconds and left.”
“Why?”
“Because he and Kathleen were working out together.”
“So? Why would that—” She broke off and found herself blushing a little. “Oh.”
Nick laughed and leaned forward for a quick kiss on her mouth. “Yes. I’ve got a feeling we won’t be seeing them again today.”
“I’m glad. It’s so obvious they’re crazy about each other. About time they admitted it.”
“So what do you say? Want to head home? Take a little siesta of our own?”
“Sounds lovely. Besides, if I have to look at one more hideous thing about Mathias Slater today, I’ll probably have nightmares.”
“Hey.” He took her hand and squeezed it. “Is this too much? Digging back into the guy who destroyed your life can’t be easy. It was selfish to even ask for your help.”
“Thank you, but no, it’s not too much. Mathias can’t hurt me anymore. What evil that man perpetrated is in the past.”
“And he’s in hell, where he belongs.”
“Yes.” She kissed the hand holding hers and then twisted back to her laptop. “I’m at a dead end on this anyway. The thread kind of petered out on me.”
“What were you pulling on?”
“Something Kathleen said a few days ago got me to thinking.”
“What did she say?”
“About how Mathias couldn’t have started being evil so late in life. That there must be decades of things he did that we know nothing about.”
“That’s probably true, but that’s way too much crap to wade through without knowing what we’re looking for.”
“I know, but all the research we’ve done hasn’t turned up anything substantial, so it makes sense that if the threats are related to something Mathias did, maybe it’s not anything recent. Right?”
At his nod, Kennedy went on, “Mathias covered his ass probably more than anyone will ever know. So I started digging for crimes that didn’t have his name attached to them, but looked like something he could’ve been involved with.”
“Holy hell, Kennedy, that would take years to sift through.”
“Yes, but I looked specifically for something that smelled like a cover-up but wasn’t recent. Crimes that might fit Mathias’s MO.”
“That’s an interesting thought, but again…a lot of shit. Did you find anything?”
“Yes and no. I found a lot of crap”—she grinned—“as you so succinctly put it. But nothing that screams a Mathias Slater cover-up.”
“But?”
Her grin got bigger. “You know me so well.” She slid her laptop around so he could see the screen. “Most small-town newspapers don’t have online archives. This one did.”
His eyes quickly scanned the information, not that there was that much to read. “This is some little town in Nebraska. Several robberies occurred on the same night. No names are listed but the suspects are referred to as ‘youths’.
“Crazy. Right? But I keep going back to it.”
“Why?”
“Because of this.” She pulled up another article from the same little town. It had a newsy hometown feel, mentioning various goings-on in and around the town. His eyes zeroed in on one line that mentioned that the Slaters from Dallas, Texas, were visiting relatives outside Omaha.
“See? These robberies happened during the time frame Mathias and his family were there.”
Nick gave a slow nod. “He would’ve been young back then…might’ve even been before he and Eleanor married.”
She sighed and then slumped in her chair. “It was decades ago, though. So crazy. Right?”
Instead of agreeing with her, Nick began to click on more sites. The gleam in his eyes told her he was on to something.
“What? You see something?”
He held up one hand. “Just a sec.”
As he worked on the laptop, Kennedy took another sip of her tea. Then, propping her arms on the table, she rested her head on them and gazed dreamily up at her husband. A year and a half of marriage and she was more in love with him than she’d ever thought possible. Not a day went by that she didn’t marvel at how blessed she was. When she’d lost Thomas and their baby, she had thought her life was over, that finding information on Mathias Slater to put him away would be her only purpose in life. She’d never believed she could find happiness again. Now, with Nick, she was unbelievably, ecstatically happy. And in a few months, she would be a mom.
Showing that after more than two years off the job, her husband still had a cop’s observant eyes, he kept his gaze on the computer screen as he said, “You keep looking at me like that, we’ll be going to find the nearest guest bedroom and have that siesta you promised me.”
Her heart skipped a beat. “Why don’t we—”
“Hot damn.”
She sat up straight. “What? You found something?”
“Yes. Maybe.” His eyes blazed when he looked at her. “Mathias was supposed to spend the summer with relatives in Dorman, Nebraska. Six weeks into what was supposed to be a three-month stay, his father came for him.”
“How old was he?”
“Twenty.”
“Over eighteen. He would’ve been charged as an adult. How could he—” She cut off at Nick’s cynical look. “Of course, his father paid to get him out of trouble. No wonder no names were mentioned. I wonder if all the boys had parents who paid.”
“Either that, or the others were minors.”
“So do you think this is something, or are we just whistling Dixie?”
“You do have a sweetly seductive whistle.” His phone chimed with a text message. Glancing down, he read it and then reached over to close her laptop. His eyes twinkling with amusement, Nick held out his hand and stood, pulling her to her feet. “That was Eli. He said something’s come up. Wants to call it quits for the evening. Start back again tomorrow.”
She beamed up at him. “Gee, a whole night off. What
will we do?”
“Oh, I think we’ll find something.”
She leaned into him. “We make a good team, don’t we?”
“In every way possible.”
Standing on her toes, she pressed a kiss to his mouth. “I love you, Nick Gallagher. You’re my heart.”
All the love in the world in his eyes, he said quietly, “And you, Kennedy Gallagher, are the very beat of mine.”
No matter how often she told herself that hiding in her room for the rest of the evening was a cowardly thing to do, Kathleen couldn’t make herself leave. Every dire warning she’d given herself had come true. She had known that staying here with Eli, working side by side with him every day, would be dangerous. This was one time she hated being right.
She paced back and forth across the bedroom floor. A sensible, reasonable person would have showered by now. She still wore the workout clothes she’d put back on after—
Shoving her fingers through her hair, she shook her head. Stupid, silly, sentimental Kat. Eli’s scent was all over her. When she showered, it would be gone. And all she would have was the memory of something she could never have again.
The tears started before she even realized it. Everything blurred, and with a hopeless sobbing sigh, Kathleen fell across her bed.
In her weakest moments, she had dreamed of how it would be if they’d made love. She had imagined it would be enjoyable, memorable. What lifeless words for the utter magnificence of what had happened. Eli had said their lovemaking had been making a commitment in the most elemental way possible. Despite her denial to him, she agreed. That’s what it had felt like.
She had hurt him with her lies, her refusal to accept what she felt, what he felt. Hurting Eli was the last thing she wanted to do. But if she didn’t continue to deny these feelings, if she accepted what her heart wanted to accept, what then? How many times did it take for her to see that when she loved, she lost? Everyone in her life, beginning with her mother, who she had adored, was gone. Everyone. If she lost Eli, too?
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