I look up at Kyle who’s standing by the doorway. “Who’s Aaron, you’re boyfriend?”
“No,” I snap.
“I’m going out for a little while, problem at the office. Will you be alright?”
“Well I’ve managed on my own so far, what’s another few hours?” I reply sarcastically, tearing my eyes away from his, folding my arms across my chest.
He sighs deeply. “I should be done around noon, we’ll go out for food, okay?”
I say nothing.
After a few moments he turns and stalks out of the apartment with a loud bang as the door closed behind him.
I’m alone, again.
Chapter 12
Kyle
She hates me, I can sense it. But who could blame her? After all, I did in effect buy her from her dad in exchange for money, used his desperation for money for the sole purpose of getting close to her, to have her.
Fuck, I sound like such an asshole, I guess I am what they say I am.
But I don’t want to be, not anymore.
I know I’ve been a dick to her, pushing her away and insisting she stay with me only for me to pretty much avoid her since she got here, spending most of my days hiding out in my office like a pussy.
It’s not the fact that I don’t want to be around her, because I do. Hell, that’s why I tracked her down in the first place after seeing her that first time in my casino.
I'd traced her father in our system, John Roberts has been a member at my casino for just over three years, so I decided to start there. Soon enough I found her, trawled through her social media, and found out she worked at her Uncle’s diner in Queens. I wasn’t expecting much when I walked through the door, I was only hoping to catch a glimpse of her, to sit and watch her work.
I left the poker chip for her, not just as just an excuse to see her again, to see if she felt anything towards me that would make her want to come back to the casino, but to put the first piece of my plan in motion; bring her and her father together and give him an offer he couldn’t refuse.
A sharp stab of guilt cuts through me at the thought of the game. She’s completely right, I use my money and power to exploit people, to get what I want. In this case, to get her.
Since the first night in the casino, I can get this girl out of my head, she’s in my thoughts morning, noon, and night, I can’t for the life of me figure out why.
Why her?
That’s what I’ve been trying to figure out for the past few days.
Why her?
Aside from burying my head in my work, I couldn’t help but poke my head out of my office every now and then to see her sat in the armchair, her legs dangling over one arm as she straddles it sideways, deep into the pages of one of the books from my study. I couldn’t help but notice how her lips moved silently as she read each word, how her brows would knit together, deep in concentration, how her face would soften and a smile would break out across her lips and a little giggle would escape as she laughed at something amusing. I couldn’t deny how my heart swelled and beat a little faster at the sight of her as I watched her like some fucking creep.
The reason I was avoiding her, was the simple fact that I can’t risk getting close, for her to get close to me, to open me up and see what’s inside, for her to see things that I’ve spent so many years of my life burying, things that would frighten her away. I can’t let that happen.
But at the same time, I want to be better for her. I want to be the man that is worthy of her. I’ve never had to do the romantic shit like buying a girl flowers or a box of chocolates, it's just not me, it’s not some I’ve ever wanted to do, until her.
I want her, I want everything with her, and I know she wants me too, she just doesn’t seem to know it yet, or at least won't admit it to herself. I’ve seen how her body reacts to mine, how she shivers when I’m near, felt it when I touch her.
God, how I want to touch her, really touch her.
I want to reach out and take her as my own.
But I made a vow to her and to myself that I won’t touch her unless she wants me to, no matter how much my fingers itch with the need to touch her, lace my fingers in her hair, over her body, no matter how much my lips tingle with the need to kiss her, taste her, but I’m a man of my word and I intend to stand by it.
But with each day it’s getting harder and harder to resist her. I crave her like an alcoholic craves booze, like a drug addict craves his next fix. Which is partly why I’ve been avoiding her. As much as I want to be around her, I want to keep my distance, to remove temptation so I don’t do anything stupid.
When I returned from the office, I offered her a bouquet of flowers that I picked up on my way home, a bouquet of pink and white roses, a peace offering. When she saw them, her face seemed to soften somewhat, a little bit of that anger she feels towards me chipped away, I daresay I even saw the corners of her mouth curve upwards slightly.
Getting her to agree to go for food with me wasn’t as hard as I had anticipated, maybe the flowers did the trick?
We stop at a small deli downtown for food and after a brief disagreement in which I insist I pay for the food and Hayley not having any of it, though eventually she backs down, finding a table in the back corner while I place our order.
Why does everyone have to be so damn stubborn?
I glance over my shoulder to find her peering around the deli, fiddling with her phone, twiddling it in her fingers.
My heart leaps.
She doesn’t belong with me, in my world, I’ll only corrupt her, I’ll only hurt her, so why can’t I let her go?
Because I’m selfish, I’m a bastard that’s why.
Maybe she can be the one to save me? To shed a little light on my dark.
I want this girl.
I want this girl so much, her body, her soul… and her heart.
I eventually reach our table with our food, for Hayley, a Greek salad and for me, a club sandwich.
I sit across from her and begin eating.
She does everything she can but to meet my gaze.
I clear my throat. “I’m sorry about leaving earlier, it couldn’t be avoided,” I take another bite before continuing, “and I’m sorry for being so distant for the past couple of days. This is all new to me.”
Her eyes flick to mine. “Never held someone in your apartment against their will before?” she snaps. She sighs and shakes her head. “It’s new for me too, you know. You were the one that wanted me for the whole week, and for the past two days all you’ve done is avoid me.”
“Fuck, I know. I just don’t know how to do this.” I rest my elbows on the table, pinching the bridge of my nose.
We sit in silence for a minute.
She sighs. “What do your tattoos mean?” Hayley asks curiously, changing the subject, eyeing the tattoos on my forearms, peeking from under the rolled-up sleeves of my shirt.
“A lot of different things. The tree represents my family, each branch represents them, me, my mom, dad and my brother.”
The tree was the first tattoo I got when I was nineteen, starting at the roots that circle my wrist, transforming into the tree trunk, spreading out into branches, winding their way around my forearm.
She nods slowly. “There are six branches, who do the last two branches represent?”
I hesitate. “One of them is for my mother… my real mother."
“Oh.” Her eyes widen.
“I was adopted,” I clarify. “The other, doesn’t mean anything, yet. I’m waiting for someone to mean something to me enough for it to represent them.”
A faint smile spreads across her lips. “And… your biological parents, do you know anything about them?”
Fuck. Here we go, I knew this question was coming, it always does when people find out I was adopted when I was a baby. I see it in their eyes when they ask me about it, the look in their eyes asking the questions they wouldn’t dare speak out loud, ‘were you a mistake, is that why mommy didn’t want you?’
If only that was the truth and not the real reason.
“My real mother died when I was a few months old.” I avoid her gaze, I can feel her gaze burning into me, searching my face for emotion.
“I’m sorry, mine died too.” I look up to meet her gaze, her eyes are filled with sadness and understanding. “What about your father?” she asks.
I tense up.
Fuck.
I can feel the anger rising up and up, it’s about to boil over, and there’s no stopping it, my heart is pounding loud enough to feel and hear it in my eardrums.
I ball my hands into fists.
“I’m not talking about him,” I snap, my jaw clenching. “Fuck, what does it matter anyway, I never knew him, either of them so stop with the twenty questions and just drop it, alright?”
I rise up, my chair screeches across the hard floor as I turn and stalk out of the deli, other diners turning their attention to me. Fuck them, I don’t care what they think about me.
I jump in my car and slam the door closed, resting my head on the steering wheel, my knuckles turning whit as my grip tightens.
One.
Two.
Three…
I breath deep, trying to steady my breathing.
Four.
Five...
The passenger door opens and shuts softly. I can feel her eyes on me without having to look at her.
I shouldn’t have snapped at her, she didn’t deserve that.
But I can’t control myself when it comes to him.
Hayley clears her throat. “I… um… I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have pushed you.”
I should reassure her, tell her it’s okay, but I’m scared to open my mouth in case I tell her more than I probably should, hurt her even more than I already have.
Instead, I stay silent, I turn the ignition and my car roars to life.
The atmosphere inside is so thick you could cut it with a knife, it's as if all the air has been sucked out, it’s suffocating.
For the entire journey, we stay in an awkward silence all the back to my hotel.
Chapter 13
Hayley
Kyle and I don’t speak all the way to the hotel, we continue in complete silence through the lobby and into the elevator. I attempt to make eye contact a few times to no success, Kyle simply turns his head away in the opposite direction to avoid my gaze.
His hands ball into fists, his breathing heavy but controlled, as if he’s trying to calm himself.
When we enter the suite, Kyle heads straight for his bedroom and slams the door behind him, leaving me standing in the middle of the room, alone.
I shouldn’t have pushed the subject of his real parents, it was dumb, but how was I supposed to know how he was going to react?
Why the hell did I even ask him about them? My heart tightens. I hurt him.
I head over to the couch and sit down, resting my elbows on my knees. I run my hands through my hair, taking a long deep breath, unsure as what to do.
I sit there for a moment before I stand up and walk towards the bedroom.
I clear my throat and knock on the door. “Kyle... look, I think it would be better if I just leave, I can see you don’t want me around me anymore, so I’ll go. I don’t care about the money, I just don’t want to make this even more uncomfortable for you, or for me. I'll come back for my stuff another time,” I say. I rest my forehead against the door. “Goodbye, Kyle. I'm sorry.” I straighten up and walk away, heading for the front door.
As I near the door, I hear a door open behind me, followed by heavy footsteps coming for me fast and loud.
“Hayley, wait.” Kyle grasps my arm and spins me around to face him.
He touches my face lightly, caressing my cheek with his thumb, his touch setting my skin alight. “It’s not you who has to be sorry. It’s me who keeps fucking everything up and doing and saying the wrong thing.” He rests his forehead onto mine, closing his eyes.
His closeness has my heart pounding. He’s so close. Close enough that if I lean in, just a little, his lips will touch mine. I can see the hurt that fills his red, bloodshot eyes.
I want to kiss him.
“I want to tell you about me, I just don’t know how, don’t know where to start. It’s dark, Hayley, really fucking dark, I don’t want to drag you into that.” His eyes never leave mine, they really are beautiful, like sapphires.
“You aren’t the only one with a dark past, Kyle.”
He sighs. “If you really want to go, then I can’t stop you.”
“What about the deal?” I ask.
“Fuck the deal, fuck the money, fuck everything, just…” His hold on my face tightens slightly and his jaw tenses. His voice lowers, almost to a whisper, “please don’t leave.”
My heart lurches at his plea, at the sincerity in his voice, it catches me off guard. He wants me to stay.
I look up into his eyes as he stares just as deeply into mine.
I exhale slowly. “Okay.”
He releases a sigh of relief, letting go his grip on my face. “It’ll be better. I promise I’ll try.”
I nod.
“I’m going to go take a quick shower, make yourself at home, I won’t be long.” He smiles down at me before he turns and disappears into the bedroom.
I hear the bathroom door close and the shower turn on.
I look down the hallway that leads to a series of doors. It has just occurred to me, that in the past two days since I’ve been here, I haven’t taken a look around.
Aside from the living area, kitchen, bedroom and en suite bathroom, there is a walk-in closet, not an inch of space that isn’t taken up with crisp white shirts, rows, and rows of suit jackets of different colours and dress pants to match. There is a study, with a pool table and bookshelves from floor to ceiling filled with books, DVD’s, CDs, and vinyl records. In the corner is a beautiful record player in a glossy mahogany finish. A grand armchair sits in the corner nearest the window that overlooks the city, no matter which window in this apartment I gaze out of, the view never fails to take my breath away.
Another room off to the left leads to an office, a room of navy blue and grey. An old oak desk sits in the center, light cascades in through the window.
I walk over to the antique desk that stands out from all of the modern touches in the room. I take a seat behind the desk in the leather swivel chair. I open one of the draws to my right, it’s filled with files and important documents.
“Hayley?” Kyle’s voice echoes through the apartment.
I slam the draw closed, just Kyle turns the corner into the room. I stand up from the chair and look at him. He’s changed into a fresh pair of jeans and a black t shirt, his hair damp from his shower.
“Hi.”
“What are you doing in here?” he asks, his brows knitting together.
“I was just looking around.”
“Snooping?”
“What? No.”
He eats up the floor and rounds the desk, a tiny corner of white paper peeks out of the draw. Kyle sees it and looks up at me, anger brewing inside him.
“So, what were you hoping to find exactly?” he asks, irritated.
“Nothing, I... I don’t know what I was doing. I-”
“You don’t know what you were doing? Hayley, the documents I have in there are private, confidential, for my eyes only, don’t you know it’s rude to snoop in someone’s house, through their stuff? When I said make yourself at home, I meant help yourself to a drink, or food in the fucking refrigerator, not rifle through my shit,” he shouts.
“I’m sorry, okay. I wasn’t snooping, I was just curious, you don’t have to speak to me like I’m a child.” I fight back tears that sting the backs of my eyes. “You know what? I’m out of here, screw the money and you’re pathetic little game, I don’t give a shit.” I begin to walk away, I round the corner of the desk and head for the door.
Kyle’s hand grips the tops of my arms and spins me to face him, my back hit
s the wall as Kyle boxes me in, his hand come down hard against the wall either side of my head.
I flinch away from him, squeezing my eyes shut, waiting for the inevitable blow, for his raised voice, but they never come.
Everything goes silent, only Kyle’s heavy breaths fill the small room.
I slowly open my eyes to find Kyle, who still towers over me, all the anger that had filled Kyle’s face has drained away, in its place is fear, pure fear. He stumbles away from me, terrified, the back of his thighs hitting the desk hard. His hands shake uncontrollably.
The Game Page 7
