by Fiona Palmer
‘Actually, you can,’ said Jaz. She almost laughed at the shocked expression on his face. ‘I could use a hug from a friend.’
Cody chuckled. ‘Yeah, I can do that.’
He pulled her in tightly and Jaz held him just as hard. Sometimes a hug was all you needed, that connection, feeling someone’s heart beat against your own, that reassurance you weren’t alone. She rested her head on his shoulder and they stood like that for a long time. And it was nice.
Chapter 20
Jaz was back at the bar a week later, after a very slow long week of no school to pass the day so she spent it sparring with the boys, shooting at the range, and they visited the paintball nearly every second day for battles. The guys who ran the paintball place, who they were now on first name terms with, mentioned another paintball place north of the city, if they wanted to try another venue, plus some outside ones in the bush.
Cody came up with a brilliant idea of buying their own paintball guns so then they could go to a block of land and hunt each other and set up targets to hit. Of course it turned out that Anna and Jaz would have to buy, thanks to Pax’s money, a bit of land, something still uncleared to use as their training area.
‘Plus it could be a place to bury a body if we need,’ said Tay.
They’d all stared at him, opened-mouthed.
‘I’m kidding. Gee whiz,’ he’d said with a belly laugh.
‘I think it’s a brilliant idea. Our parents will think we are using the money to buy investment property,’ said Anna. ‘But we’ll have a place to go to shoot whenever, even at night.’
‘Oh, we could get night-vision goggles,’ said Cody.
‘I wonder who will pay for that,’ Anna had mumbled.
Jaz had been a little disappointed that Tay and Anna seemed to have gone back to normal after their big snog fest at the party. She didn’t want to pry in case they were keeping it a secret from her while it was still new. But it was hard when she just wanted to see her friends happy. If they took too long, she’d decided she was going to talk to Anna and see what was going on. Maybe they’d blamed the alcohol for it happening and gone their separate ways? Who knew. It was a little irritating not knowing but Jaz was trying to keep her nose out of it.
Having work to go to was a blessing. It was a good distraction and she was dying to see Ryan again.
As it turned out he didn’t turn up on Thursday night, but the boys were there on Friday night and twenty minutes after Bud turned up, so did Ryan. Jaz didn’t think she could ever get sick of seeing him. Their eyes met briefly but so much passed between them. It was hardly a passing glance but they made every millisecond count.
‘Hey, great to have you boys back,’ said Jaz. She knew Stevo got a kick out of being included with the ‘boys’ even though he was the oldest. Jaz was really taking a shine to Stevo, which always came as a shock when she caught sight of the tattoo on his wrist. It reminded her that no matter how nice someone was, they could always hide a secret. Jaz did, but it wasn’t a bad one like Stevo’s. She wondered what he did for the Shesha Serpents. Was it just keeping an eye out or, being the gardener, did he bury bodies? For all she knew, Stevo could be the one that kills unwanted people snooping around Jamison. Probably took to them with his gardening pruners. She shuddered and found it hard to believe. Surely she was a good judge of character? She got Ryan right. Her gut told her that Stevo had a soft heart.
Hopefully he didn’t prove her wrong.
‘We come just to see you, Jeni,’ said Bud with a smile.
Now Bud, she was uncertain about. He could have a crazy killer hidden inside. Like a switch, or a Jekyll/Hyde kind of thing.
‘Awe, shucks Bud, you’ll make me blush,’ she said. ‘So who’s for a cold bevvy?’
She got to glance at Ryan when he said yes to a beer. It wasn’t much but another vision for her memory bank that she’d cherish, along with all the others.
It wasn’t until Ryan came to pay for the third round that she got to speak to him alone. Well, without his workmates around; there were still other guys at the bar but they hopefully weren’t paying attention.
‘Hey, Jeni, can I get another round?’ said Ryan.
He smelt so sexy Jaz was having a hard time stopping herself from leaning over the bar to take a deep breath of him. ‘Sure can, Reece.’
He held out his money between his fingers and as Jaz went to take it she noticed the small white slip of paper with it, tilted away from any prying eyes.
‘Thanks,’ she said, taking it carefully. As she dropped her hand down to walk to the till, while hidden behind the bar, she slipped the note into her pocket.
Then she had to ring up the change and sort out the beer the whole time the note was burning a super hole in her pocket like a hot coal.
‘Here ya go.’ With a last glance at Ryan, she turned and served a few more people down the end of the bar before Ted came back and she ducked off for a toilet break.
She just about wet her pants with excitement as she sat down on the toilet in her private cubicle to open the note.
24-16-5, 66-33-12, 11-25-6, 102-53-7, 98-54-8, 41-17-22, 70-26-18
Damn, she should have guessed it’d be in code. What if he was searched at work? Maybe they were searched all the time. It was good that Ryan was playing safe, only now Jaz had to wait until she could get home. Then she had to find the magazine he’d given her ages ago that they communicated through. In a way it was nice to know he still carried the same magazine around with him, like their own personal phone that only they knew the pin number to.
The rest of the night seemed to drag on, the note an even bigger distraction in her pocket. At least she still got to sneak glances at Ryan, but she was too busy with a big crowd to spend any time with the guys who kept to their group of three, Wilkins not making an appearance.
Bud made a point of finding her before he left, she was at the bar trying to catch up on washing glasses and getting them stacked into the fridge.
‘We are off now, Jeni. Just wanted to say goodbye.’ Bud held his hand up and gave a little wave, which was weird on his stocky form.
‘Aw, how nice. Bye Bud. Sorry I was too busy to get a game of pool in with you.’
‘That’s alright, maybe we’ll try come on a Thursday when it’s quieter?’
‘Yeah, that would be great.’
‘Sweet. See ya.’
Jaz waved and kept it going when she saw Stevo and Ryan looking her way. She tried not to let the longing and desire for Ryan end up in her eyes for all to see.
Half an hour later, Ted stood in front of her while she had the broom in her hands. ‘You’re like a cut bloody snake,’ he said shaking his head. ‘You really wanna get home, hey?’
Jaz did. She’d been going hard to get everything closed up and done. ‘Yep. I do.’
Ted took the broom from her. ‘Go on then. I’ll finish up here.’
‘Really?’ Jaz leapt into his arms and hugged him. ‘Thanks, Ted. You’re awesome.’ Then she grabbed her backpack and headed for the door at a jog before he could change his mind.
Jaz struggled to stick to the speed limit when she finally left the agency house and made it to the gym in record time. She cursed when the key wouldn’t turn properly as she was so eager to get inside. In the end Anna opened it up for her.
‘You right? It was sounding like a big ol’ rat trying to chew its way through the door, cursing as it went,’ she said sleepily.
‘Sorry, I got a note from Ryan and I’m busting to decipher it. Go back to bed and I’ll tell you what it says in the morning.’
‘Fine by me,’ said Anna, whose eyes had shut. She turned in her cow-print pyjamas and shuffled back to her bed, either by feel or she’d opened her eyes again.
Jaz went to her room, flicking on the light, and rifled through her drawers looking for where she’d stashed the magazine.
‘Bingo.’
She found a pen and paper then flopped down on her bed, pulled the note from her pocket and w
orked through the numbers. Page number, line number, then word number. Slowly the message came together.
garden city ten jeans west middle change room
Jaz took out her phone and googled Garden City and it brought up the shopping centre south of the city and east of her. It had a Jeans West store. Right, that’s where she’d be at ten o’clock tomorrow.
Was Ryan going to meet with her? Or was he leaving her something there? Jaz was so excited she almost skipped to the bathroom to shower and then ended up lying in bed wide awake. The only thing that got her to sleep was not wanting to look like crap just in case she did get to see Ryan.
***
Jaz woke with a fright as Anna’s face was almost pressed up against hers.
‘Good morning, Sunshine. Did you decode it?’
Jaz was about to curse her when she smelt the coffee. Opening her eyes wider, she realised Anna held a tray with a coffee and some toast with jam.
‘Oh, thanks.’ She sat up and went straight for the coffee, taking a good gulp. Now she felt more awake she could answer Anna’s question.
‘Okay, I think he wants to meet me at Garden City, in the Jeans West shop, middle change room at ten. At least, I hope I get to meet him and it’s not just something he’s left there for me.’
‘What would he need to leave you? I think maybe he just wants to be able to talk to you freely,’ said Anna before taking a bite of toast. ‘Do you want me to come and keep a look out?’ she mumbled.
‘Actually, that would be great. You could guard the change room.’
‘I’ll block my ears if any funny business starts,’ she said with a wink.
Jaz saw an opportunity and took it. ‘Like what happened with you and Tay?’ She puckered up her lips and did air kisses.
Anna’s eyes grew big and her hand went to her mouth. ‘You saw that?’
‘Yep, so did Cody, so we know it happened. But what’s going on? You two don’t seem to be together?’
‘I don’t know, Jaz. I thought it was just the alcohol making Tay kiss me. I mean, I was rather merry and it was all very in the moment stuff. It was amazing and,’ her face turned skywards, ‘perfect and his kisses are … well … I’ve never had that before.’
‘Did you talk about it afterwards?’
‘No. I just said I had to go get a drink of water.’ Jaz pulled a face. ‘What? I was a little overwhelmed. I could feel my face burning and I didn’t know what to do.’ Anna shrugged. ‘He hasn’t said anything since, so I just went back to being how it has been. Friends.’
‘Anna, maybe you should start looking at Tay as more than a friend. Personally I think he’s crazy for you.’
‘No. Really? Me? But I’m not …’
‘What? Not what he usually dates? Did you think that maybe he’s changed, he’s found someone who really gets him and supports him? You are smart and beautiful, Anna. Why wouldn’t Tay be interested?’
Anna’s mouth opened and shut but no words came out. She was doing a great goldfish impersonation though.
‘Look, I need to pretty myself up for Ryan, just in case, and you need to get out of your PJs.’ Jaz looked at her watch. ‘Hell, we’ve only got half an hour and we need to be on the road.’ Jaz cursed again before she sculled more of her coffee and reached for some toast. Late nights meant she slept in but she couldn’t do that this morning.
‘Heck.’ Anna took the tray back to the kitchen before going to change.
Half an hour later and they were in her Jeep on the way to Garden City shopping centre. After parking, they raced up the escalators to find the information stand so they could find Jeans West.
‘Here, just up and around the corner. Good.’ Jaz started walking at a slower pace that matched the shoppers.
‘You think Tay could really like me?’
Anna’s face was confused and unsure, her mouth twisted.
‘Yes. Why would he kiss you? Haven’t you noticed how attentive he’s been lately? You two have spent lots of time together.’
‘We have, haven’t we. But I thought that’s mainly because you’ve been busy, you know. I love Tay heaps but I just never let myself think about us that way, just didn’t think it would be possible.’
They got closer to the store; Jaz’s heart rate increased and she searched the crowd for that familiar face. ‘Just so you know, I’m happy either way. I love you both and just want to see you guys happy.’ Jaz glanced at Anna quickly to show she meant what she said.
‘Thanks.’ Anna gripped her hand. ‘We’re here. I’ll go look at the clothes and keep a watch.’
She let her go and walked to the ladies’ collection of Jeans. Jaz headed to a nearby rack and found a top, it was probably not even in her size but that didn’t matter, she took it to the back of the store where the change rooms were. Through an archway there were three change rooms and all were unoccupied. A large mirror was at the very end. Jaz put her hand on the door, her breath caught in her throat, her skin prickled with anticipation as she pushed it open and stepped inside.
There was nothing inside except a mirror, a seat and lots of hooks. Momentarily she was upset; no parcel, no Ryan, but then she realised maybe he was still coming.
She was a minute early. Jaz hung up the top and then sat on the bench, and waited. At five minutes past, the door opened and Jaz jumped up thinking it was someone wanting to use the change room, she hadn’t locked it. Except it wasn’t just anyone. It was him.
Ryan walked in with a shirt in his hand, turned and locked the door, then hung up the shirt on the closest hook.
Jaz stood there, totally lost in watching him move, the way his muscles rose when he hung up the shirt, his familiar scent driving her into a bliss-filled Ryan coma. His dark eyes latched onto hers, they were simmering. He was clean-shaven, wearing a black t-shirt and denim jeans. Jaz, funnily enough was in similar gear, except her black top was a singlet.
‘Hey, you,’ he said, almost a whisper.
There was music playing in the shop and it would give them some cover over any sort of conversation if they kept their voices low.
‘Hey, back,’ said Jaz, her throat felt dry like a sandy dune. Yeah, she was lost for words. This tiny change room was their little private oasis. They stood there like two cowboys sizing each other up before a fight. Only this wouldn’t be a fight, the look in Ryan’s eyes said not today.
Then he brought out his sexy, melt your belly smile and next thing she knew he had pulled her body against his. This time the hug wasn’t rushed like the last one.
Ryan groaned as she sunk into him. She latched her arms around him then, realising she could as she snuggled into her Ryan pillow of heaven. God he gave the best hugs.
She felt his lips against her ear, was he kissing her?
‘I’ve missed you so much.’ Another kiss. ‘Jasmine,’ he purred softly.
It sent her body into spasms of delight.
Ryan was now kissing down her neck. It was sweet torture as she tried to keep control of her thoughts. What was she about to say?
‘Um, really? You missed me?’
He stopped with the kisses and pulled back. Jaz made a little noise of objection. She didn’t want him to stop, ever.
His hands clasped her face as he tilted her to meet his eyes.
‘Were you followed?’ he asked seriously.
‘No. Were you?’ she shot back.
He smiled and shook his head. ‘I doubt you could you even begin to understand how much I’ve missed you. Your spunk and quick wit. This hair,’ he said as he reached for a handful, letting it slide through his fingers.
Jaz could feel him growing hard against her. Another shiver of delight racked her body.
‘And those eyes, this jaw, these lips,’ he said, running his thumb across them as he licked his own lips.
Jaz was hoping he was holding her tightly because if he kept this up she wasn’t sure how long before she went completely gooey. Her hand went to his face. ‘I’m a little confused,’ she said. And
she was. Pushed away one minute and held closely the next. She let her hand slip across, so her fingers could play in his hair.
Ryan closed his eyes and smiled. ‘I love it when you do that.’ He bent his head so it was touching Jaz’s forehead. ‘Jaz,’ he whispered, she almost missed it. ‘You’re what’s getting me though this. The things I have to do. You are my torch.’ He moved so he could place a kiss against her skin. ‘I love you.’
What? Come again. Did she hear that right? She looked up and saw the truth in his eyes and his expression. ‘You do?’
‘I think I always have and I’ve probably fought it every step of the way, knowing that I shouldn’t, but I refuse to fight it anymore. You are too important to me.’
She may have been looking at him in disbelief, her mouth open, shock all over her face, but that melted away the moment his lips found hers. Oh my Lord, she had waited so long for this moment. To see Ryan and not be able to hold him and kiss him had near on ripped her apart, but now she finally got to lose herself in his warm kiss. He tasted of coffee. His tender kiss soon turned hungry and hot.
Jaz felt his need as much as her own fire burned bright. His tongue made her forget where they were, let alone what city. He owned her, she gave herself to him completely. She pulled away just long enough to say, ‘I love you too, Ryan.’ She found his lips again like a hungry lion to its prey.
Never in a million years did she think Ryan would tell her he loved her. She thought she was alone in the love department.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said pulling away. ‘It seems wrong to tell you that and now I have to leave.’
Jaz had her hands all over him, trying to memorise the feel of every muscle. ‘I understand. Quite frankly, I wasn’t expecting any of this,’ a little smile crept along her face as she flushed a little, ‘but I’d do it again in a heartbeat.’
They hugged each other tightly one last time before pulling apart.
Ryan reached for the lock latch, paused, leant back to Jaz to get one last kiss. ‘I love you. Don’t forget that.’ Then he grabbed the shirt he was supposed to try on and left.
