by Dale Mayer
As they watched, the vet techs came out again and led the bigger dogs into two different treatment rooms.
Brock reached for a German shepherd, lying on its side, and Denton could see bald patches and scars along its side. The shepherd lay there, staring at Brock with huge eyes. Brock scratched him gently behind the ears. “You’ll be fine now, boy. You’ll be just fine.”
For Denton, it was one more shock to his system. He adored animals, all of them. And to see so many hurting, well … he could feel a lump rising in his throat. “I want to help.”
The receptionist stood from behind her desk, shuffling folders. She gave him a gentle smile. “And you certainly can. But one of the best things you can do is get strong enough so you can help yourself. And then you can take on as many volunteer hours in the vet clinic as you want to give.”
He nodded. The woman had a valid point.
“The first batch is getting their checkups now,” she said. “The rest of the day will be full of shampooing, a lot of fur clipping and many medical treatments. Now that the triage is essentially done, we know who needs treatment first.”
Brock nodded. He and Brock stayed for another twenty minutes, gently petting and calming the animals still in the larger room. And while they waited, several other animals were switched out and collected. When they finally left to go upstairs, only four dogs were left that still needed to be checked over. “We’ll come back later and see how they’re all doing.” He glanced down at Denton. “You ready to go?”
Swallowing hard, Denton gave a sharp nod. “Yes.”
Quietly the two headed toward the elevator. As he was about to push the button, Brock stopped. “Oh, I got so caught up with the dogs, I forgot to show you what else is down here.” He pushed the wheelchair farther down the hall and took a left. As he went, he pointed out the stalls, access to the barns, and the double doors that led out to the pastures. “But we want to go this way.” And he took Denton in the other direction. There the double doors opened up to a huge patio and a massive pool.
Denton sat back and stared. A huge smile crept over his face. “Oh, wow. All I want to do is go in there, like, right now.”
“And you will. As soon as you get the green light from your health team,” Brock said. He pointed out the changing rooms and the hot tub.
Denton could see all the modifications on the pool to help people get in and out—even a motorized seat that moved up and down for those who needed it. “You don’t see a pool like this in very many places.”
“No. We certainly put it to good use though.”
Denton scanned the water, watching three people splashing around. A man was doing laps, a woman sat on the pool’s edge, and the other woman was treading water. Denton wasn’t sure, but it looked like she didn’t have any arms. He stared down at his bad leg and realized, yet again, how lucky he was. He wasn’t helpless. And knew he could tread water in the pool without too much trouble. Then he remembered how some of his back muscles had been replaced in his right leg and wondered how that would affect his swimming.
“Don’t worry about it.”
It was as though Brock had read his mind.
“You’ll do what you can do as fast as you can do it, and then you’ll improve from that point on.” Brock turned him around. “The stairs over there go up to the deck, where we were sitting for coffee before.”
Denton nodded. “Too bad there isn’t an elevator right here.”
“You’re right, there isn’t, but we use the one back down the hall where we came downstairs. There is also a service elevator, but we’re not allowed to use it unless there are exceptional circumstances.”
“I guess there isn’t that much need for another elevator. Because people don’t use one for the vet clinic, correct?”
“Correct. The clinic has its own door on this lower level, and that’s what the vet clients use.”
Back at the elevator, Brock got them inside and upstairs. “I haven’t heard from Cole, but I suggest, given the hour, that we pick a table.”
“I’d like to see Cole over lunch, if we get the chance.”
“You will, if Cole’s in any physical shape to make it. If he’s not, then we’ll hit his room afterward.”
At that thought, Denton fell silent. Because of course, what he wanted was only part of the equation. What Cole wanted and what Cole could do—well, that was a whole different story.
They made it back to the same table they’d used before, but now the room had filled up by half. Denton could smell delicious aromas as big bins of food were brought out for the buffet. “I can’t believe I’m hungry.”
“You need the food to rebuild. They do not cut corners here, and it’s all good stuff.”
“Denton? Is that you?” Cole raced toward Denton.
Tears stung his eyes. He opened his arms, and Cole threw his arms around him and gave him a huge hug. When he stepped back, Denton looked his buddy up and down.
“Oh, my God, I’m so glad to see you here,” Cole said. “I was afraid you couldn’t make it.”
Denton was completely surprised to see Cole looking as well as he was. He wasn’t as fit or as big or as strong and obviously not quite as healthy as Brock. But Cole was still miles away from where Denton currently was. He shook his head. Seeing his two buddies was like a look into his own future, where he might be in a month or two as compared to where he’d be in six months. “Damn. You look good, man.”
Cole grinned at him. “It’s you who looks good. We’re so glad to have you here.”
Chapter 4
Hannah wondered what it was about her new awareness that made her see the missing element in her life everywhere. She remembered, back in college, a pregnant woman saying that ever since she found out she was pregnant, all she saw was pregnant women around her. Maybe that was a good thing. Maybe it made her realize she wasn’t alone in whatever condition she was in. Hannah seemed to understand how much her lack of friends had impacted her life now that all she saw were other groupings of friends.
Denton may have started this new process that she hadn’t noticed earlier, after she’d seen him with Brock. And now Cole was with them. She sat at the far end of the deck, all alone like always. The other staff, although friendly, weren’t necessarily friends. And when they did come together, it was usually over meetings or because they had patients to discuss and needed advice from one another. Still meetings but more informal.
After a year of being here, she hadn’t made close friends. Sure, there were guys like Shane. Stan downstairs. She was friendly with Dani. But not to the point where Hannah arranged to have lunch with them every day. Maybe that was on her. Maybe she had messed up. Maybe she sent out some sort of vibe that said, Stay back. I want to be alone.
It’s what she knew. And change was hard. Being alone was comfortable. At least it had been up until now. She didn’t like it, but she wasn’t sure that she disliked it enough to make the effort to change it.
Laughter came from the side of the deck where Denton and Brock and Cole sat, which brought her attention once again to the three men. They’d been friends since forever. Been through some of the most grueling training anybody had been through. When they saw one of their friends fall, the others had been there to help. But now that all three had fallen—physically injured, yet on the way to recovery—they were all here to help each other get through this chapter of their lives. It was incredible. It was amazing. It was uplifting.
It was also heartbreaking.
If she were in a car accident right now or some disease or illness overtook her system, who would help her get through the day?
She’d lose her job, and she wouldn’t be able to pay her bills. Sure, she had decent medical insurance here, and she would get medical care, but she couldn’t continue to live here. She’d have to find another place, and she’d be alone. She had no other friends in town or even close to town, and she would go through whatever healing process was required, either to recovery or to death … al
one.
It was a terrifying thought.
As she’d never faced a major trauma, her lack of friends and family wasn’t exactly something she’d had to face. But now that she looked at it closer, she didn’t like the gap in her world. Unlike some people, who filled the emptiness in their lives with work and hobbies, she’d just closed the door and acknowledged that that part of her life didn’t even exist. That wasn’t good either. She stared at the coffee cup in her hand, studying the swirls of coffee at the bottom of the mug. Aimless. Confused. Insecure. Because throughout all this was the question: Why didn’t she have friends? And that brought up the next question, which was: What was wrong with her?
She gave a heavy sigh, leaned back in her seat, raised her coffee cup and stared over it at the pasture. Many a day she’d sat here and smiled at the animals, enjoying the view, loving being part of this place. But right now it was hard to see the beauty. All she saw was a single horse in the pasture, which made her instinctively feel there should be two horses. Because, in her mind, she was certain the horse was lonely.
And if she felt the horse was lonely, clearly she was projecting her own loneliness onto the animal. And clearly she felt lonely because she was alone. The two didn’t always go together. Often she enjoyed her own company, just have silence around her, that sense of comfort in her own space, but right now, she admitted she was lonely. But for how long had this been? As she kept the door closed on that whole compartment within herself, she wasn’t exactly sure she had an answer. Now that she was wondering, however, it seemed like forever. She’d had various friends in school. But not friends she did anything with on the weekends or ones who discussed every detail of their lives with her.
She’d had a couple boyfriends but none lately. Most people preferred to be with a partner so they weren’t alone. Her last relationship had only been so-so, and when it had broken off, she hadn’t been upset. It was also why she hadn’t been too worried about finding another relationship until she found somebody she was really attracted to. No more settling.
So far, that hadn’t happened. Until now. Until Denton. Hannah had to wonder if her interest was merely because of that vibrant energy, that sense of gratitude, that sense of I can do this which surrounded him and how he had attracted two such good friends. She saw no hint of ego or arrogance, which she was accustomed to seeing from so many people. Neither was there that brokenness inside that she’d seen a lot of. It was like he walked carefully through the middle of all that maze of emotions and did it very successfully. He had charisma. Was that why he had friends? Did he send out a welcoming energy to say, You’re a friend I haven’t met yet?
She wanted to know. At the same time, she was scared to become too friendly with him in case that spark of attraction wasn’t mutual. What was it he had that allowed him to make and keep friends? And the people she worked with? What did they have that enabled them to have such good friendships?
Because they did. She saw the staff groupings but hadn’t really seen them until now. She glanced at Denton once more to see the three men full of joy and laughter with such a sense of welcome and delight in being in each other’s company. They’d all been through such hardships, and she was proud of them. Amazed at how well they had handled life when it had reached up and smacked them down.
Insight struck her like a lightning bolt. She wanted to be part of that circle.
As she watched them, Sidney joined them, placing a hand on Brock’s shoulder. He looked up at her, and his smile didn’t brighten, but it changed. It became more intimate, more loving. Sidney got inside that circle. Sidney had a bright, sunny personality, whereas Hannah was quietly reserved. She was happy to be around others but quite content to retire to her room all alone.
Sidney called out to somebody. Hannah watched as Sandra walked over, for Cole. Sandra accepted his hand. He tugged her down and tucked her closer and whispered something in her ear. The other men chuckled, and Sandra blushed and rolled her eyes. Hannah was close enough to see the intimacy yet far enough to not hear the conversation. As she studied the five of them, she saw another aspect of Denton that she didn’t understand.
He was clearly content to simply be there, content to watch his friends find partners. He didn’t show any sign of being jealous or of feeling left out. Instead, his huge expanse of a smile said he was so grateful to be included.
Maybe that was it. Maybe she wasn’t happy with her friend world as she wasn’t included in much. She knew many people here, but she wasn’t part of any inner circles. She was happy to be here—thankful even. But she wasn’t particularly grateful for something special in her life. And that was sad.
In fact as she watched Denton for a while longer, she realized how empty her life truly was.
“You guys look great together,” Denton said warmly. “I never thought to see the two of you pair up with such beautiful women.”
Brock smiled. “These women are beautiful on the inside as well as beautiful on the outside. I’ve thought about this. Maybe we had to get so empty inside so that there was room for them. I guess our lives were so full of people before, so many orders, so many routines, so many instructions, and so many things to do in a day that although we had time for relationships, there wasn’t nearly as much room for them then as there is now.”
“It’s not just that,” Cole added. “We weren’t as welcoming of something at this level because of all the other stuff that filled our days. Our relationships were more superficial as well. That was all we had time for. But now look at us. It’s a whole new world out there. And I, for one, want to make the most of it. I feel like I didn’t lose ten years of my life but more like my life had gone by so fast I almost missed those ten years. I know the next ten will disappear almost as quickly. And I don’t want them to go by in a blur, not knowing anything about what happened. I want to look back and know they were the foundation for the rest of my life. I want them to be happy years. I want to wake up in the morning and smile. I want to go to bed at night with peaceful dreams, not nightmares.”
It was hard to miss the whisper of concern across Sandra’s face. She squeezed Cole’s shoulder gently.
He reached out and patted her hand. “I’m fine. Don’t worry. The nightmares haven’t started up again.”
Denton could see the relief on her face.
“Just checking,” she said quietly.
Denton nodded and smiled. “Sounds like nirvana, what you all have.”
“That doesn’t mean it’s not available to you too, Denton,” Sandra said. “Maybe you’re not at the point yet where you can see the joy of what’s to come.”
He glanced down at his mangled leg and gave a shrug. “That’s possible. It’s hard to see anything yet.” He raised his gaze and caught sight of Hannah sitting all alone on the other side of the deck. He had assumed she awaited somebody joining her. But now that her meal was done, she sat there alone, her mug in her hand, staring out over the pasture. It was the lonely look on her face that caught his attention. Surely she had friends here. He couldn’t imagine working in a place like this without making lots of friends. Then again, he was an extrovert. He made friends easily, always had. He understood some people had to work at it. He always thought that was a shame. But the world was full of all kinds of people. He watched as she put the cup on the table, then pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. As if holding herself in and keeping the rest of the world out.
“Hey, Denton? You there, buddy?”
He pulled away his gaze and glanced at Brock. “I’m here. What did I miss?”
A knowing gaze crossed Brock’s face, as he looked where Denton had been staring.
Denton shook his head. “Nothing there, Brock.”
“There could be, if you want it to be,” Brock said with a big grin.
Cole piped up. “I feel like I’m missing something now.” His gaze slipped from one buddy to the other, as if looking for answers.
Denton smiled. “You’re not mi
ssing anything, yet.”
At that point the two women said goodbye to their partners and headed inside the dining hall and back to their various workstations. The men stuck to their schedules and were able to spend their free time however they wanted. But both women were employed at the center. That was a whole different story for them.
Suddenly Brock pounded the table with his palm. His grin widened. “Damn, it’s good to have you here, Dent. Who’d have thought all three of us would have made it like this?”
Cole grinned. “Hey, we all survived. That’s the most important part. I’m happy to be alive and with whatever health and physical ability I have now. I know it’ll get better—especially with Sandra at my side.”
Denton had no one at his side, but he had his friends, and he hoped that, in time, their new partners would become his friends too. The three guys had all had girlfriends in the past and at no point had those relationships been allowed to break up the three men’s friendships.
And instinctively he knew that these women wouldn’t come between them either. Content in knowing that he had friends who would be there with him through thick and thin, a clan of like-minded people who would grow and develop as their relationships and families grew, he smiled.
He was truly blessed. Denton studied his friends’ faces and nodded. “And I’m damn glad to be here too.”
Chapter 5
For the next week and a half, Hannah went about her job but constantly noticed groups of people paired up in discussions, both professional and personal. Also, a lot of visitors came back and forth as several families checked out the facilities to see if it was the right place for their loved ones. Other family members came to visit loved ones. Everywhere Hannah looked, she saw togetherness. To combat being overwhelmed by her feelings, she focused on the people who were single at Hathaway. Shane and Stan came to mind, and there were certainly lots of others. Stan had a life downstairs with his own staff. She didn’t know a whole lot about them. But as she gravitated away from the friend groups, she realized she was gravitating more toward people who were single.
