Well, now is as good of a time as any to get up out of bed, piss, and at the very least brush my teeth. I’ll worry about my looming mountain man status later.
I roll out of bed and notice that I’m still in my jeans from last night. I go to unbutton them but realize that they are soaking wet on the front.
Did I get so drunk last night that I pissed on myself? If so, this is a new low for me. As I lift my pants to toss them blindly into what I assumed was the corner my hamper is in, I catch the faint tang of soured milk. I gag, holding out the pants a fair distance away.
Damn that reeks!
With more will power than I currently own, I hesitate for a second, then bring the jeans to my face, sniff, and about puke at the cream and sour milk smell coming from them. White Russians.
Thank god, I didn’t pee myself, but damn this is just sloppy. I can’t even recall how I got home last night.
I shuffle slowly to the bathroom making sure to stick close to all the surfaces available to hold onto. I have yet to get my rolling stomach under control. I feel like I’m on a boat swaying back and forth, dizzy from the pounding behind my eyes. I make it to the dresser just in time to be crumpled over with a cramp in my stomach. I lurch forward trying to steady myself, while simultaneously trying to breathe through the stabling sensations going through my gut. Unfortunately, while doing so, I proceed to knock off everything that had once been kept in meticulous order. As the items hit the floor, I moan, covering my ears with my hands as the noise sends another wave of pain through my head. I drop to my knees, curling into a fetal position trying to get a grip on myself.
I really need to get my shit together.
In all honesty, have known this for a while, but I just don’t know how to move on from what my life has become.
After a few minutes of steady breathing and keeping as still as possible, I decide now is better a time than any to get back on my feet and finally get to the bathroom.
I’m so tired of this shit, honestly, I am. Last night will be my last night of getting that bad off.
I roll to my side ready to push up, but wince, “Ouch, shit!” I bellow as I drop back and cradle the back of my elbow while sucking in ragged breaths. A hot pain slices down my left arm. My fingers feel wet; I pull my hand away to find bright red blood coating my palm which starts to drip between my fingers.
What the hell happened?
I look around blinking the remaining blur from my eyes and see that I have landed in some glass when I went down.
What the hell did I break?
I twist backwards and that’s when I see it. A picture frame fell, the cover glass now shattered all around my body. I pick up the frame and my stomach rolls but for an entirely different reason. My chest starts to feel tight, restricting. My hand starts to shake. I try very hard, every day, not to look at this photograph, having turned it the other way so that I don’t have to see it. I close my eyes, but it doesn’t help much as I have the image imprinted in my mind, every single detail big and small. This photograph used to give me such joy, my heart would stutter happily from seeing it, from seeing her. I squeeze my eyes tight. Now all it leaves me with is a hollow feeling, a bitter sweetness. It’s just visual proof of one of my many major fuck ups in my life. The one that haunts me day and night. Her name whispers to me in the back of my mind, but I shut it down.
Lock it the fuck up, man.
But temptation overrules my feelings, the urge to see the photograph physically and not just mentally. I slowly open my eyes, taking the last remaining jagged pieces of glass away from the frame. Then I proceed to I dust it, drawing out the moment a while longer. Then I zero in on it photograph.
It’s a picture of my best friend and me after we were placed first and second in our first professional surfing competition. That day truly was one of the happiest days of my life, but this isn’t why I love this picture. No, the reason this is my favorite picture is because of his sister’s expression as she looks to me off to the side. I can’t even remember who took this back in high school, but I am glad they did. They captured her natural beauty, the type that makeup could never accomplish. She looked radiant in her bright yellow sundress, fitting really, because she really was like my sun. I kept gravitating to her, needing her light and sunny disposition in my life, only to darken it and ruin everything. The complex look of love and pride on her face shines at me. My heart clenches as I work hard not to cling to the picture frame. My eyes start to sting from unshed tears.
She will never look at me like that again.
I suddenly remember all of the things I have been working towards trying to forget. My monumental fuck ups constantly following me like a dark cloud over my head. My vision starts to blur in and out, my pulse pounding in my ears. I shake my head.
Ugh! One more night of drinking couldn’t hurt. Well, not nearly as bad as it has hurt since losing her, my sun.
***
Connor
I have about had it with Flint’s angry pacing!
He is really waning on my patience, and that says a lot. Next in line to Tucker, I am probably the most patient person here.
“Chertpoberi, Everett! Yes, that is exactly what happened!” Flint throws his hands in the air, frustrated, with a growl in his tone. His face is starting to grow red just like a ripe tomato.
Although, it’s on the tip of my tongue, I probably shouldn’t point that out to him right now. I know he’s beyond his breaking point this morning. He had lost his will to remain calm sometime between getting home and having to wait thirty extra minutes for Zephyr to come down from his doom and gloom, sweaty room. I think the reality of what has happened to his bar has finally set in. Or at least that was what Tucker had told me when he leaned over to whisper in my ear just now, as that’s what he’s been picking up off of him.
I, on the other hand, am working very hard to keep my mental walls up. It’s always overwhelming whenever one of the guys is on a tirade. With Flint’s anger, Everett’s confusion / disbelief, and Zephyr’s broodiness picking for a fight, there would be no way I could keep myself calm and clear headed.
Would I even be able to hear myself?
So, I’m just casually sitting next to Tucker while feeding him some of my control while he leaks a little calming sensation to everyone.
Not like it’s helping much.
“So, let me get this straight,” Ev readjusts his black rimmed glasses up his nose as his brow crinkles in confusion, “each of you has encountered this young woman and after making contact with her she has merged with your alliance? Not only that, but afterwards you guys have had enhanced reactions to your element? Does that sum it up?” He takes his time looking to each of us.
“If you want to put it so mildly, then yes that is basically what has happened. I still think she is a damn succubus taking our life force.” I pop off to him. This earns a sarcastic snort from the Zephyr still brooding in the corner, rubbing at his tired, red and bloodshot eyes.
“Sounds more like a bad case of blue balls to me. Maybe you guys should try and get laid. Might release some of that built up tension, I know a few hot ladies who be happy to service you, or maybe even some guys for you Flint, seeing as I’ve never actually seen you go home with a woman before.” He stops rubbing his eyes, now crossing his arms over his chest, smirking. I sigh.
He is such a dick when he is hung over.
Tucker gets up suddenly from next to me and walks over to Flint, wrapping his hand around Flint’s arm in warning.
Yeah, Zephyr is looking to get his ass kicked.
“I like women. I just do not sleep with everyone I see like you drunkenly do so lately.” Flint growls and Tucker squeezes his arm.
“Do you even know what the fuck has happened to my business, you creaton?” Flint yells over Tucker, causing him to wince. I look back at Zephyr, to see a feral smile cross his lips. This wasn’t going to be good. I stand up bracing myself to be ready to jump in between them and assist, just as he opens his s
mart mouth back up with a remark.
“It’s not my fault that you can’t seem to get a woman… or man,” he winks at Flint. “To release some energy, like I said, maybe if you had worked some of that built up pressure off in some way you wouldn’t be dealing with this.” Zephyr finishes as he lounges back on his chair, cocking his brow up in challenge.
Flint rushes to his feet abruptly; Tucker’s grip on his arm loosens and falls away. Just as Flint is about to shove him out of the way, Everett stands up, intercepting him before he can do anything further, bellowing out a stern, “ENOUGH!” Everyone freezes. Everett rarely raises his voice, so when he does, we all tend to stop and listen. He turns from Flint to Zephyr, jabbing an angry finger towards him.
“Zep, shut your fucking mouth. We don’t need this today, and if this wasn’t an important issue concerning you, I wouldn’t have even had Flint wake your worthless drunken ass up.” Zephyr’s eyes grow large. Ev was the last person he expected to get told off by. Good he deserves to be startled a little. We were all trying to be patient with him, but frankly we were over his crap. Everett wasn’t done though; he swung his body around now pointing at Flint.
“And you get your damn temper under control and ignore Zep. You, just like the rest of us, knows he’s still not in his right mind.” Flint freezes seeming to take in all that Ev has flung out at him. He looks to Zephyr, tilting his head slightly, truly looking at him. When it seems like he’s accepted the truth of his words, his eyes soften, and his head dips in acknowledgement. He squeezes Tuckers shoulders gently in an apology, and then drops his hold.
“Now, Flint, Tucker, sit your asses down and let’s go over what the hell has been happening.” He finishes after staring Zep down, daring him to say anything else. When he doesn’t, he nods, and sits on the arm of the dark brown leather recliner.
“Now Tucker,” Ev turns to him after he reclaims his seat next to me on the couch, “let’s go over what you told us to begin with, and this time please give us all the details.” Tucker nods his head and then proceeds to retell what had happened to us that day at his office.
“I had an appointment with a woman regarding the follow up of an inner family adoption. There were no complications within the file so I just wanted to consult with her face to face to be able to see and feel out her emotions and her intentions.” Tucker started to play absentmindedly with a thread hanging off the side of his shorts. He was truly in the best field for his talents; one that I knew was personal to him. Ever since that time Flint showed up on his door step, it was like Tucker had discovered his true calling in life.
“Well, it had been a rough morning and I had originally thought due to that I was just a little over sensitive in my perceptions, but when circumstances had us touching, the sensations I felt were intense. I had a throbbing pain so intense that I thought my brain was going to melt and drain out of my ears.” I wince alongside Tucker as he tells this, because somehow, as soon as he touched her hand I felt exactly what he did.
“Ah, all because of a little touch huh? Good touch or bad touch Tucker?” Zep has his feral smile set back in place, ready to garner a reaction out of someone.
“I meant for you to keep your damn mouth shut Zep. I am serious.” Everett turns his scary guy look on him, and Zep drops the smile immediately.
“What about you Connor?” Ev looks at me to hear my side again.
“Like Tuck-a-roo said; as soon as he touched her I felt the same pain. Except, I was in the waiting room so I struggled to be more covert about it; I’m pretty sure that the receptionist thought I had a bad case of gas, what with the way I kept moving around.” I glance at Zep only to see him crack a millimeter of a genuine smile.
Huh, well maybe he isn’t completely lost to us.
I feel my shoulder relax a fraction. In this moment, I actually realize just how tense I am, and how scared I have been for Zep and his behavior lately. It seems like nothing we do can break through to him.
Everett keeps telling us to give him time and that people grieve and heal in different ways, but it’s truly hard to just sit here and watch him destroy his life. I guess Tucker feels the swell of hope that’s built up in my mind because I catch him looking from me to Zep just as that small smile drops from his lips. When he looks back to me I shrug my shoulders and try to strengthen the barriers in my mind more.
“Well we’ve already heard about what happened with Flint,” Ev looks over to him perched on a chair that he had dragged over from our island bar during Tucker’s rehash of his side of events. He may have calmed down, but is still sending scathing looks towards Zep.
I sigh quietly, rubbing my forehead, making a mental note to make sure neither of them are alone in a room together for a while. Ev continues, “The only things I see that have a common denominator is the fact that this woman has been forced into our alliance and your connection to your elements has amplified, is that correct?”
“More like we lose control over our elements,” Tucker says, “but yes, that’s right.” Out of the corner of my eye, I see Zep open his mouth to say something, but this time Ev beats him to it and throws up his hand to stop him. Zep deflates and sinks back further into his chair trying to seem like he doesn’t care. I suppress a snort.
“Well, I think I might have the answer, but I won’t be certain until I can make physical contact myself.” Ev announces to us and I see most of the room scoot further up in their seats, anxious to finally hear the answers to our questions.
“This might seem a little farfetched with the way we were raised, but please keep an open mind.” Ev turns and gives us each individually a stern look, even to Zep whom has now decided he would perk up and find interest in our conversations. I roll my eyes.
“Okay just tell us,” Flint demands.
“I do believe this woman might be our Manipulator.” Ev blurts out in such a calm and convincing voice, that it takes me a minute to rethink through his words to actually grasp their meaning.
“Our what?!” Zep, even though still nursing a bad hangover, was the first one to comprehend, “you have got to be kidding me, and we all know that the Mikroelementy gene is only patriarchal. There has never been a recorded female Mikroelementy, let alone a Manipulator.” He scoffs, looking at Ev like he is a moron.
The rest of us stay quiet, soaking in the shock of what he has just dumped into our laps. Out of everyone, I trust Ev’s perceptions and logistic answers the most, as he never allows his feelings to overrule his judgment. So, I start to think about the possibility.
What a fricking minefield. It could change everything. I know Ev would never have suggested it if he didn’t think possible. It seems to me that he has thought long and hard on the possibility of having a female Manipulator. I know him; his answer was too fast to have really looked into all angles from our meeting alone. Which leads me to my next question, how long has he been puzzling over the possibility of a female Manipulator?
He catches my look and nods, telling me that he has listened in on my thoughts and I am on the right track.
Well, fuck a duck. Why hasn’t he said something before now?
“Nothing is impossible Zep,” Ev calmly retorts a moment or so later. That’s when I notice how calm he still is. I realize he is set on the truth of his answer.
“What are you going to tell us next? That a pig can fly?” Zep pops off meaning to be a smart ass, which knowing Ev he promptly tears down.
“Well Zep, evolution is a powerful thing. You see, I do believe one day that yes pigs will be able to fly. That is if our world evolves to cater to the need of forcing a pig to evolve or die. That would require our life as we know it to pertain more upon higher elevation, or the sky. Thus, it would remove a lot of the main source of foods from within the pigs well reach. At that point as it has been proven before, I believe a pig’s body would start adapting like all creatures do, and then will begin the slow process of evolution. Of course, it would start out small at first, little lumps somewhere on their back, a
nd quite possibly these lumps, over a long period of time, would develop into something resembling a wing. Just bones and flesh of course. Maybe, using these mock wings, the pigs are able to reach nutrition from without its reach; then at that point, the pig will slowly adapt and their bodies would start revolving around the goal of survival. So, as you can see, yes, it is possible for them to evolve to fly. Just like it was for early humans whom walked on all fours, then evolved to our modern day forms to only walk on two.” Everett finishes in complete seriousness, leaving Zep slack jawed and unable to formulate a response.
Score one for Geek Lord.
Zep shakes his head and gets up out of his chair, making his way to the kitchen to rummage through the fridge. The rest of us smile towards each other, I swallow down a laugh that wants out.
Ev, sits with his chin tilted up, thoroughly enjoying the fact he has shut Zep up and outwit the smartass game he’s been playing.
“Like I was saying, I do believe this woman is our Manipulator. The results from the situations in which the three of you have explained seem to point at that being the only answer. Don’t ask me how yet, because I haven’t gotten that far, but what each one of you have felt what I have felt too. Only, it was when I was gathering all of you.” He pauses to let the true meaning of his words sink in once more.
No one in the Mikroelementy knows why, though I am sure Ev is still searching for the answer, but Earth based elements tend to be the one to feel a pull to create an alliance. Ev believes it has something to do with being one with nature, I say that’s his hippy side coming out and trying to compensate for not having the solution to his little puzzle.
“Tucker, do you by chance have her case file on you? I would like to start digging into her and find out all we need to know. If this is the answer, this is ground breaking. It is also something short of a miracle since it has been over twenty years since the last complete alliance was formed.” I watch as his eyes glaze over, his face goes slack; a vacant look appears on his face as he disappears into his mind, the Geek Lord’s world of puzzle solving. What he considers his happy place.
Controlling the Elements Page 11
