by Jeremy Asher
Jesse paused and turned to face her. She threw her arms around him and squeezed him tightly. He knew he should tell her how he felt about her. About the fire that burned deep inside of him every time the thought of her passed through his mind. But the words wouldn’t come. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I just care about you.”
“I know,” she said.
It was now or never. If he didn’t tell her today, there would be no more chances.
She released her hug but kept her hands on his arms. Jesse stared into her eyes and swallowed. “Sarah, there’s something I need to tell you.”
“What is it?” Her soft voice echoed music into his heart.
“I think…I think I’m in—”
A knock on the door interrupted Jesse. “Is that Kevin?”
She had a confused look on her face like she wasn’t sure. “It shouldn’t be. He’s out of town taking care of some business before the wedding. I don’t know who it could be.”
Sarah checked the peephole and then opened the door. “Dr. Bradtmiller.” She opened it wider. “Please, come inside.”
Dr. Bradtmiller’s scrubs and white coat had been replaced with a pair of khakis and a dark green polo shirt. “Thank you,” he said, taking a few steps inside. “It’s good to see you, Sarah.” He gave her a hug as if they were old friends. Then he turned to Jesse and held out his hand. “Hello again.”
Jesse shook his hand. “It’s good to see you.”
“What brings you here?” Sarah asked.
“Is it all right if we have a seat?”
“Of course,” she said, waving him over to the couch. “Can I get you anything?”
“No. I’m quite all right, but thank you.”
They both sat on the couch and Jesse took his seat on the sofa. Dr. Bradtmiller looked around, his smile never fading.
“That was a moving ceremony, dear. Your father would have loved it.”
“Thank you,” she said. “For everything. I never did get the chance to tell you how grateful I was for everything you did for Dad.”
He waved it off. “It was nothing. I was only doing my job.”
Sarah shook her head. “Not the times when you stopped by his house to check on him. Or when you’d come into the hospital during his treatments when it wasn’t even your day to be there. You went out of your way to make him feel comfortable and I am so thankful for that.”
The doctor placed a hand on Sarah’s “He was a good friend and a great man.” He paused as if trying not to cry. “I just wish I could have done more for him.”
“He knows you did the best you could. And if there was anything else you could do, you would have done it.”
“That’s actually what I’m here for.” Dr. Bradtmiller opened a thin leather briefcase that Jesse hadn’t realized he was carrying, and pulled out an envelope. “Your father did have one more thing that he wanted me to do. He asked me to give this to you.”
Sarah’s eyes narrowed on the envelope. “What is it?”
He handed it to her and shook his head. “That I don’t know. He gave me this letter the morning before he passed away. He told me to wait two weeks before giving it to you. I tried to talk him into giving it to you that day, but he made me promise that I’d wait two weeks.”
Sarah stared and then flipped it over. Her fingers traced the letters that spelled her name. “It’s Dad’s handwriting.”
“Your father was one of the kindest, most caring men I ever met. And one thing I know for sure is that he was very proud of you, Sarah.”
She turned to the doctor and reached over with a hug. “Thank you.”
“Well,” he said, standing up. “I really need to get back to work. I just wanted to give that to you and honor one final wish for a friend.”
Sarah and Jesse stood up and Jesse shook the doctor’s hand.
“It was nice seeing you again, Jesse.”
“Same here.”
Dr. Bradtmiller pulled Jesse closer and whispered, “Take care of her.”
Jesse nodded.
They both watched as Dr. Bradtmiller walked out of the apartment and shut the door behind him.
“Would you like me to leave?” Jesse asked.
Sarah didn’t answer. She stared at the envelope in her hands. “Actually, I think I’d rather you stayed. Is that okay?”
“Of course,” he said. “Anything you want.”
Lowering herself into the couch, Sarah took a deep breath, then finally worked up the courage to open it.
Inside was a folded-up piece of paper. Sarah said, “Would you mind reading this for me?”
Jesse nodded and took the letter from her. He waited as Sarah grabbed a tissue. “Just getting prepared,” she said.
Dear Sarah,
I’m so sorry you have to read this letter. The thought of leaving my beautiful little girl, especially someone as incredible as you, is difficult for me. But knowing that you won’t be alone brings me great comfort. You are about to be married, and Kevin is a good man. You also have surrounded yourself with good friends in your life. One who has recently come back into your life, one who I know cares about you very much and will see to it that you are safe and happy, just as he did when you were a little girl. Please tell both Kevin and Jesse thank you for me. It brings comfort to a father, knowing that his daughter is safe.
I want you to remember what I taught you. Don’t make the same mistakes I made. Make sure that you go after the things in life that you are passionate about. It’s passion that breathes life into the shells of our existence. Always take time to enjoy the small wonders that are all around us. They’re blessings in disguise. And don’t forget to enjoy a sunset now and then.
There’s one thing that I need for you to do for me. It’s something that I had planned on doing before your wedding but didn’t have the strength. Do you remember that time capsule we buried about ten years ago? I know that you made me promise that we wouldn’t dig it up for a hundred years, but there is something in there of value. Something that you need to have. Please do this one thing for me.
I’m so sorry that I won’t be there to walk you down the aisle. To stand by your side and give you away. But when you’re staring down that aisle and you feel the butterflies stirring as everyone stands to see you, I’ll be right there, looking down on you. You’ll feel my love like a warm and tender kiss on your cheek. I love you, Sarah. You will always be my sunshine.
Love,
Dad
Chapter 31
Sarah
“Thank you for driving me to Whispering Meadows.” Sarah looked over at Jesse, staring through the windshield of his old truck. A truck she had grown to see as a perfect fit for Jesse, her old and dependable friend.
“Well, I couldn’t let you ride your bicycle there, could I?”
“I could have taken my dad’s car, but I don’t know if that old thing would make the trip.”
“It’s no problem. We should probably stop by my place and get some supplies though.”
“Sounds good.”
Sarah couldn’t believe she was doing this. Driving three hours to New Haven to dig up a time capsule that she and her father had buried nearly ten years ago.
Jesse’s truck came to a squealing stop as he pulled into the parking lot into the back of the store. “Did you want to come in or stay here?”
“I’ll stay.”
“Okay. I won’t be long.” Jesse got out and disappeared into the store.
Sarah looked up at the sky. Feathery clouds splayed across the expanse, glowing pink and purple in the fading sunset. It had been a long time since she had enjoyed a sunset. She thought about her father and how finite things like sunsets really are. You never really know how many are left.
When Jesse returned, his arms had an awkward grip around a bundle of tools and gloves. He tossed them into the back of his truck and climbed in. “Well,” he said. “We’re off to the willow tree.”
Sarah spent most of the first hour staring out the pass
enger window. Neither said much. She wondered how it must feel for Jesse, returning to a place so close to the awful events of his childhood.
Soon the sun had completely gone down, leaving the moon and stars as their only light as Jesse drove down the highway.
Jesse turned to Sarah. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. I’ve just been enjoying the ride,” she said. “What do you think our lives would have been like if we had never moved from Indiana?”
“It’s hard to say. I guess I would have had to take you to prom.”
“Had to? Jesse Malone, you would have begged me to go to prom with you. And then I’d have had to look into those big blue eyes and give in.”
Jesse let out a laugh. “Yeah, you’re probably right. I mean, you are a Whispering Meadows princess after all. I was just a poor boy from Clear Creek. In fact, you probably would have stopped talking to me by the time we were in high school.”
Sarah’s mouth opened wide. “What? I wouldn’t have done that.” Jesse gave her a yeah, right expression. “You’re the one who would have stopped talking to me,” she said. “You would’ve been too cool to talk to a Whispering Meadows girl.”
“You’re the one who’s too cool. Look at you. Long, curly blond hair, perfect skin and teeth. You’re way too manicured and cool for me,” he teased.
“Me? Look at you. Tall with long, wavy brown hair and big blue eyes. You’re definitely the one who’s too cool.”
“Wow, so you really do dig me.”
Sarah turned to hide the warming in her cheeks. “You’re too sweet, Ponyboy.”
“Hey! You weren’t supposed to start repeating that name.”
She looked back at Jesse. “I’ll admit that at first I didn’t see it. But after spending some time with you these past few weeks, I can now.”
“See what?”
“You and Ponyboy,” she said. “You’re sweet, a little shy, cute, and you have a depth that it is rare in men. You have this intensity about you. And you’re very passionate about the ones you care about.”
“You’re very passionate, too. Your eyes radiate when you talk about your father and the plant nursery.”
Sarah turned her head toward the passenger window. “I miss him.”
Jesse reached over and placed his hand on hers. “I know you do.”
Sarah folded her hands and tried using them as a pillow against the passenger door.
“Are you tired?”
“A little,” she said.
“Come here,” he said, waving her over. She slid across and Jesse wrapped his right arm around her, offering his shoulder as a pillow.
Sarah took in Jesse’s manly scent of soap and cologne. The type of smell she could easily get lost in. The safety she felt within his arm was more than she had felt with anyone else. Kevin was strong, but they rarely took the time to do things like this. In fact, would he have even gone on this trip with her? He wasn’t one to get caught up in whimsical journeys, no matter how romantic. He had been raised to be practical, level headed, with two feet planted firmly on the ground at all times. But beneath Kevin’s hard shell was a heart every bit as big as Jesse’s, Sarah knew.
Jesse kept one hand on the wheel and his eyes fixed on the road. “You should get some sleep. We’ve got another two hours before we hit New Haven.”
“My mother stopped by last week.”
“Are you serious? And how did that go?”
“I slammed the door on her.”
“Really? So not well?”
Sarah had run that conversation with her mother over in her head a thousand times since that day. Could her mother really be sincere? Had her father been seeing her for the last couple of months before his death? Where the heck had she been all these years? “She blames me for Henry’s death.”
“Are you sure?”
Sarah nodded. “That has to be why she left us. Ever since Henry died, she treated me like I had a cold she didn’t want to catch and acted like my father didn’t exist. Then she vanished.”
“What happened to Henry?” Jesse looked down at Sarah. “If you don’t mind me asking.”
The memory of that day had haunted her nearly every day since. Henry’s smile was enough to melt the coldest ice. He had an innocent way about him.
“Henry and I had a game that we played all the time.”
“Robbie and I did, too. Ours was bloody knuckles. I played it because it was easier than taking a beating from him.”
“That sounds terrible.”
“It wasn’t as bad as you’d think. One person has to hold out their fist while the other person punches it. If you flinch or pull back, then you lose. It was stupid really.”
“Ours was stupid, too. But at the time I didn’t realize how much.”
“What was it?”
“Tag.”
“That game isn’t stupid. Lots of kids play that game.”
Sarah remembered the look on Henry’s face when she rounded the corner of the bush. She gave him the I’m it and going to catch you look. “Henry was busy building something out of a pile of rocks. That’s what he used to do; instead of pushing boundaries, he built things.
“He looked up at me and smiled. He knew the game was on and all I really wanted to do was catch him. It was just something we did for fun. But when I ran after him, he darted straight into the road and in front of a car.”
Jesse’s arm tightened around Sarah. “I’m so sorry.”
“It was my fault. I shouldn’t have chased him. I should have known that he would do that. He was only five years old and all he wanted to do was avoid getting caught.”
“You were young yourself, Sarah. You had no idea that he would do that. Did you ever speak to your father about this?”
“No. The last time we spoke about Henry was when we were still living in New Haven. I noticed Henry’s bedroom door was open a little. I peeked inside and saw my dad sitting on Henry’s bed with the Star Wars blanket and holding onto an action figure that Henry used to carry around with him everywhere he went. He saw me and waved me in and we cried together.”
“It had to be hard on your family.”
“It was. And my mother spent the next few years blaming me for it.”
Jesse looked down at Sarah. “Look at me,” he said, his voice as soft and caring as his large blue eyes. “It’s not your fault, Sarah. It was an accident. Accidents happen. There was no way for you to see it coming. It’s not your fault.”
She looked back out the windshield. His words were comforting, and she almost believed them. “Thank you, Jesse.”
Chapter 32
Jesse
Shortly after driving past the sign welcoming people to New Haven, Jesse pulled into the entrance to Whispering Meadows. The lights in most of the homes were off. The large Victorian houses were bigger than he remembered as a kid. Most were white with a different colored trim, and many had large balconies. He couldn’t help but wonder how different his life would have turned out if he had grown up in a place like this. Then he looked at Sarah, who had fallen asleep with her head on his shoulder, and remembered what his Uncle August always told him: Money can’t buy love or happiness. Maybe he was right.
“Sarah.”
Her eyes opened and blinked a few times before she sat up. “What time is it?”
“I’m guessing it’s after ten. We’re here.”
She looked around and wiped her eyes. “You mean I slept this whole way?”
“No. Just the last two hours.”
“I’m so sorry. I’m a terrible traveling partner.” She stretched her arms. “This place hasn’t changed a bit.” Jesse’s shoulder felt as if someone had frogged it. He gave it a few rotating twists. “I’m sorry. You should’ve knocked me off of you.”
“No, you’re fine. Which house was yours?”
She looked up and down the streets as if catching her bearings. “Turn here,” she said, pointing to the left. “That’s our house there.” She pointed at a house not much differe
nt from the rest. Three stories, white, with large windows and decorative molding around the house. Only the huge pillars at the top of the steps set it apart from the others.
“Nice house.”
“Yeah, too bad it doesn’t come with the nicest of memories.”
Jesse shot her a smile. “They weren’t all bad, were they?”
She smiled back and shook her head. “No. Not all bad.” She looked back at the house. “How are we going to get to the willow tree?”
“Just leave that up to me.”
Jesse got out of the truck first. He looked around before pulling out a blanket, tossing it over his shoulder. Then he removed a flashlight and handed it to Sarah before removing the shovels and gloves.
“Yeah, this doesn’t look criminal or anything.” Sarah giggled.
“Shhh,” Jesse said, pressing his finger to his lips. “You’re going to blow our cover.”
Sarah laughed even louder.
With a military wave, Jesse set off, Sarah following behind with the flashlight. They crouched down, careful not to make too much noise as they walked up the side yard and stopped beside Sarah’s old house under a cloak of darkness.
“It’s too dark,” Sarah said, turning on the flashlight.
Jesse tossed the blanket over the flashlight. “Are you trying to get caught?”
“Oh yeah, this whole trespassing thing is illegal, isn’t it? Sorry. I keep forgetting that we’re breaking the law.”
Jesse leaned in toward Sarah, placing his face directly in front of hers. The smell of her sweet perfume was enough to make him forget for a moment what they were doing there. Then he noticed that her eyes held a slight reflection of the moon. The thought of kissing her passed through his mind but he dismissed it in order to focus on the task at hand. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but you are a terrible criminal,” he informed her.
“I’m sorry. I’ll try harder, sir,” she said, saluting.
“Have you been sneaking alcohol when I wasn’t looking?” he asked.
“I’m sorry. I always get a little goofy when I’m really nervous. I don’t think I’d make a very good bank robber.”
