by Sara Breaker
She didn’t say anything. She wasn’t even looking at me. But she took one of the glasses I was holding and drained it quickly. I had to grin. “I see time away from Marco is agreeing with you,” I remarked, giving her look another once-over.
“Oh my god,” Claire shot me an annoyed look, “would you just shut up? I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Jeez, someone’s having a really bad day,” I noted passively, then offered the other glass of wine I had to her. “My offer still stands, you know,” I said with another grin, “Whenever you want to get that palette cleansed.”
Naturally, I had seen Claire’s look of scorn before but it was particularly prickly tonight. “It’s that fast, is it?” she cut in, before declaring, “Just because Marco’s got a new girlfriend doesn’t mean you’re suddenly allowed to hit on me.”
Just then, I noticed Claire’s gaze distract somewhere and I looked up to see what it was.
Tyler and Janice had found Marco and Nina. Marco, inexplicably, was also wearing a shiny silver shirt for tonight’s party.
I was about to snicker and remark something insulting about matching couple outfits to Claire, but before I could say anything, Claire grabbed my second glass of wine, chugged it down quickly, then whirled around to walk away.
I tried to see where she went but she was quickly swallowed up by the party crowd.
Admittedly, I’d had a couple of drinks in me when I wandered into the house about an hour later. My date had gone to powder her nose and I was actually looking for the hot bartender whom I thought I had seen come into the house a few minutes earlier.
I easily recognized Claire through the ornate stained-glass door of one of the lounges on the ground floor. For sure, nobody else was wearing that dress tonight. The door was already ajar. It creaked slightly when I nudged it open. “Hey Claire,” I called out, “do you need a drink refill?” I was being friendly. I mean, we were friends.
It was only a split-second when she glanced back at me but I could tell right away what was going on.
Claire was crying.
I blinked in shock.
“Oh shit, Alex,” she mumbled, clumsily wiping her face.
I shut the door after coming in. “Are you okay?” I asked, a little bit concerned.
She didn’t reply. I heard her attempting to control her breathing from short gasps.
“Oh jeez…” I patted her back awkwardly. Obviously, I didn’t know the first thing about comforting crying women. That was, without getting them to sleep with me. I should have gone and looked for Janice so she could help Claire out. Instead, I asked, “Is this about Marco?” and couldn’t help to add, “I thought you said that was ancient history?”
I heard her take a long, deep breath. She still didn’t say anything but the answer was plain. I’d had absolutely no idea that she had carried this torch for him for so long. It struck me as strange that even Janice didn’t even seem to know how upset Claire was about this whole thing.
I creased my forehead. Ironically, what was going through my mind was how talking about exes was specifically successful in making women feel vulnerable that they would feel the need to lean on your shoulder for support. And I actually knew exactly what I should do and say in these particular situations, but I hesitated for a moment. It was Claire, for god’s sake.
But then finally, she spoke.
“He didn’t even tell me…”
I tried to meet her gaze. “Well…maybe…he thought it would be better this way,” I guessed, trying to be helpful.
“Oh god, what about this is better?” she sighed dejectedly.
I noticed tears stream down her face again and my frown deepened. “Sshh… It’s okay. Come here,” I shushed, pulling her towards me. It seemed natural to stroke her hair, have her face buried in my chest. At the same time, it felt awkward and strange.
When Claire broke off sniffling for a moment to look up at me with those big, blue eyes, I just did what naturally came to me. I cupped her face in my hands and leaned down to brush my lips across her eyelids - just to soothe her, to make her stop crying. It just didn’t seem right, her crying. I had never seen Claire like that before.
Then I realized my heart was pounding in my chest, and instinctively, I leaned my head further down to taste her lips. I intended to be brief, light, comforting. But as soon as I felt her soft lips against mine, I kissed her again, more ardently the second time, as though hungrily, my tongue parting her lips, tasting her tears.
Claire pulled away abruptly, bewildered at my actions.
I met her gaze, looking stunned myself.
Unfortunately, I knew exactly what she was thinking – the only thing she could have been thinking. My record with women was certainly nothing modest, and I knew that she knew full well it was absolutely within my capabilities to take advantage of her vulnerability.
“Ugh, what the hell is wrong with you?” Claire broke off, sounding disgusted.
The stained-glass door rattled as it slammed closed behind her.
I blinked, trying to reconcile reality with what had just happened. Whoa. I touched my mouth, blowing out my breath. I knew I definitely shouldn’t have done that. That was a total mistake. But I creased my forehead in wonder and disbelief. That was one hell of a kiss. Claire was absolutely full of surprises tonight.
And I was suddenly revitalized. New mission: I totally had to hit that.
Marco and Nina Get a Cat
I wasn’t sure what it was about couples, but they tended to want to take care of things together. I would have thought like sharing a plant would have been the easy option, but I supposed that wasn’t enough of a responsibility.
That day when Marco and Nina decided to get a cat, I decided to tag along. Not that I was terribly interested in rescue animals. It’s just that I knew Claire volunteered at the animal shelter.
Since the party at Marco’s parent’s house, I had taken on a new challenge. I put a temporary hold on my weekly roster of hook-ups and one-night stands with a view to score what I considered the biggest ultimate hook-up ever. The surprisingly lovely Claire Hale would be the crowning glory of my year. The mere accomplishment of it would be an incredible confidence boost and would surely carry my ego for months. But only if I managed to pull it off.
The plan was simple. I just had to always make sure to be around Claire every time Marco would be – at the bar, at parties, whatever. That way, if the time ever came again that she needed a shoulder to cry on, or perhaps more, I would be the first guy that she would see.
And I would be the most sensitive, most comforting, most decent gentleman in the world.
The perfect rebound.
Except it never seemed to work out.
Honestly, it was feeling like it had been a pretty long two weeks already. I guessed I had underestimated how long a mission like that would actually take, and what I would have to give up in the meantime. I didn’t even want to count the number of times I’d had to pass on hooking up already and how much sex I’d had since I started—way less. Not zero, of course, but I’d seriously had to cut down.
I knew it sounded completely cold, but I also told myself that, to some degree, I was also going to be helping Claire get over Marco. What better way to get over some guy than to do his super-hot best friend, right?
It was around Thanksgiving when we went to the animal shelter and the place was decorated for the holidays accordingly. Fake cardboard turkey on the counter, red and green paper cut-out chains hanging on the ceiling, certain volunteers wearing fake feathered headbands or pilgrim hats.
On the beat-up corkboard on the wall, under the heading: “Volunteer of the Month”, I spotted a picture of Claire. She had put on a goofy smile on purpose. She had been volunteering at the shelter for years. It was one of those details about her that I’d never really paid attention to but had always known.
When Marco, Nina and I came in through the doors, I immediately spotted Claire in the back. She was playing with one of
the dogs, waving a tattered little toy rabbit. Her hair was in a messy bun and her clothes had splotches of muddy water on it, but she looked so happy, her smile was bright and genuine. She was wearing an angel halo, instead of feathers. Somehow, I thought it was appropriate. I couldn’t help an involuntary smile.
Then Marco called out his greeting, “Hey, Claire.”
Claire glanced up and her smile immediately faded upon seeing the three of us. Yup, probably the last three people she wanted to see.
Then Marco and Nina spent ten whole minutes describing to Claire the kind of cat they wanted to get. I had to stand there and listen to them jabber on, and in couple talk no less, like constant giggling and finishing each other’s sentences. A tabby, a kitten, a calico, something furry and cuddly, black with orange stripes—no, no, white with black stripes, or wait—black, white and orange. They were going to share custody of the cat – half the week it would stay at Marco’s, the other half at Nina’s, but they wanted to make sure that the cat felt at home, so that it didn’t get too confused with the arrangement.
What the fuck did it matter? It was a cat!
And after those ten whole minutes, when Claire led them through the gate in the back so they could have a look at the cats that were available, Nina glanced back at Claire, smiling brightly. “Thanks, Claire,” she beamed. “You’re a doll.”
“Take your time. I’ll be right here if you have any questions,” Claire called melodiously, putting on her biggest and fakest smile.
I had stayed behind and had to laugh.
“What?” she prompted, darting a look back at me.
I pursed my lips, shaking my head as I leaned back against the counter. “You absolutely cannot stand them looking so happy, can you?” I prompted, even though I already knew the answer.
Claire rolled her eyes and replied wanly, “I honestly don’t give a flying fuck.”
That made me chuckle again. Claire had always struck me as so prim and proper. Sure, I had heard her swear before but never as emphatic, or colorful.
She shot me another look as if to say ‘what’s so funny’, but instead, “What the hell are you doing here anyway?” she asked, purposelessly rearranging some flyers on the counter.
I stopped short, straightening up. “Oh right,” I blinked.
I was on.
“Well, I…” I paused, pursing my lips again. “The truth is…I…actually wanted to apologize for—that time at Marco’s party,” I relayed, before clearing my throat. “I was totally out of line. Honestly, I was drunk. And I know it’s been kind of weird between us since, so I just wanted to…clear the air.”
It wasn’t totally insincere, since ever since the last party, Claire was being really careful not to be alone with me. And it wasn’t always easy to make excuses as to why I always around. At the bar, sure. Out to dinner, or to the movies, no problem. But accidentally running into the three of them when Claire had accompanied Marco and Nina to the bank for some legal purpose, for example—did get a bit tricky. Although to her credit, Claire was still always civil, always nice, but she would also always make a point never to linger.
Claire just looked at me with a blank look on her face, and I swallowed hard, hoping she didn’t see through the fake 80% of that apology. Turned out, I was in luck.
“Is that why you’ve been following me everywhere lately?” she finally prompted, peering at me with narrowed eyes. “You wanted to apologize?”
“Uh…” I hesitated then answered correctly. “Yes.”
She blew out her breath, looking away. “Forget about it.”
I watched her expression. It sounded as though I was instantly and completely forgiven, which was surprising, since I knew a lawyer could quite just as easily argue that I should be arrested for assault. I creased my forehead and glanced over briefly at Marco and Nina talking to one of the other animal handlers, and then Claire asked the question I thought she would ask next, “You didn’t tell Marco, did you?”
I wondered if she was worried for a different reason, like maybe she wanted to try to make him jealous. But I just shook my head quickly, still carefully watching her face, before I stated rather than guessed, “And you haven’t told Janice.” Because I knew if she had, a “storm” of Janice would have definitely already come bearing down my head, and it was highly unlikely that I would have survived.
Claire gave me a look. “Are you kidding?” she said. “Can you imagine if I told Janice any of this?”
I cracked a grin. We both knew Janice well enough to know the answer to that question.
Claire and I both watched the “happy couple” play with one of the kittens they picked up from the fenced little cat playing area. Claire didn’t look sad…or upset. But after a moment, I caught her take a deep breath in to sigh heavily.
I took a deep breath myself. “Ssso…who’d have thought, huh?” I gestured to Marco and Nina cooing over the cat.
She blinked up at me like she had only just remembered I was standing there, before she shook her head slightly, sounding rueful. “I’d just always thought Marco was a dog person,” she said, shaking her head. “I guess I really was mistaken.”
I furrowed my eyebrows at what I believed was misplaced remorse on her part. “Look,” I started in earnest. “You could do so much better than Marco. Trust me. I mean,” I shrugged casually, “you just have to pull out that hottie in the white dress again.”
A corner of her mouth turned up, amused. “You liked that, huh?”
I looked away, chuckling to myself again at her tenacity. She didn’t even blush. “I mean, you know. That girl was smokin’!” I remarked. “Where’ve you been hiding that all these years?”
“Oh, you don’t like this look then?” Claire quipped, gesturing to herself good-naturedly. “The ‘just got peed on by dogs and got mud in her hair’ look?”
“No, no,” I shook my head laughing lightly. “This—this is good too,” I replied nodding slowly, surveying her appearance. “But I mean, that girl—that girl could get any guy she wanted. I would kiss that girl again,” I remarked offhandedly.
It didn’t occur to me that Claire would get offended by my bringing that up again. But sometimes I say things I don’t think through. It happens.
Her entire face clouded over and she shot me a poisonous look. “What the hell are you doing?”
“I’m just saying—I’m here for you, you know?”
Claire shook her head in loathing, but not exactly disbelief. “You’re such an ass.”
Before I could say anything more, another girl came up to the counter just then. She was wearing an volunteer’s pilgrim hat. “Claire, sweetie, can you do the closing tomorrow? Pretty, pretty pleeeeez,” she sort of cooed at Claire, giving her the batty eyelashes treatment. “I have to take my mother’s car to a mechanic, and it’s going to be such a drag if I have to keep driving her everywhere for another week.”
Claire visibly groaned. “Seriously? Why am I always the one doing you favors? I closed for you twice already,” she rolled her eyes before resigning. “Fine, but this is the last time, okay? We all have other jobs too—and I don’t mean just dancing at random clubs waiting to be discovered.”
But the girl was looking up at me now. She gave me a cute little smile. “Hi.”
I cleared my throat and managed to smile back at her. “Hi there,” I said shortly.
Claire rolled her eyes again. “Daphne, Alex. Alex, Daphne,” she recited mechanically.
Daphne giggled as she put out her hand to shake mine. “It’s really nice to meet you.”
“Likewise,” I replied, before looking back at Claire.
Claire had her eyebrows raised expectantly as she looked back and forth from Daphne and me, since Daphne was still standing there.
I glanced back to meet Daphne’s gaze again. She was still smiling up at me. I hid my groan and just turned back to her with, “Say, why don’t you give me your number and I’ll call you sometime?”
Daphne giggled again
before she quickly wrote her digits down on the back of one of the animal shelter business cards. “I get off at 6,” she added. “Maybe I’ll see you later?”
“Sure,” I smiled back at her nonchalantly as I pocketed the business card.
When Daphne still didn’t leave, Claire cleared her throat loudly and pointedly, “A-hem, don’t you have some work left to do?” which made Daphne jump in surprise and only then finally walk away, but not without a glance back at me and another sweet smile.
I bit my lip in amusement, shaking my head to myself, as I turned to Claire to comment on the situation. But she put her hand up to stop me. “Don’t even,” she said wryly.
That was when Marco and Nina finally came back with a little gray kitten and Claire had to write them up some paperwork.
“Thanks for coming along, Alex,” Nina beamed at me once it was all done. “Wasn’t this so much fun?”
I had to stifle my laughter and was glad when Marco interrupted, except what he said next was, “We’re going to get Chinese takeout for dinner. You two want to join us?”
Claire blinked and I thought I saw horror in her face at the thought of sharing a meal with the two lovebirds. It was the first visible reaction I had seen from her in response to the situation. I decided to reply for her. “Rain check, dude,” I said as I mocked Marco a salute. “Claire said she was going to introduce me to this hot friend of hers who works here too—Daphne something.”
Marco chuckled and he gave me a wink. “That’s my man. No rest for the wicked, hey?” he remarked as he bid me a wave. Then he glanced up at Claire with a charming smile, “Thanks for the help Claire. You’re the best.” And he and Nina left through the swinging double doors.
That last note made me involuntarily frown. Marco could really be so full of himself sometimes. I turned back to Claire, expecting her to still be standing at the counter, perhaps recovering from the whole encounter, but she had walked over to the supply closet and when she came back, she had a broom, a mop, and a bucket on a little roller cart.
“I’ll see you around, Alex,” Claire gave me a brief nod as she opened the dog play area enclosure gate to let herself through.
