She smiled to herself, relieved at the hesitation she heard in his voice. He was going to tell her.
He moved behind her, wrapped his arms around her waist and slipped his hand inside her light sweater. “We won’t be able to sleep together tonight.”
“Yes, I know.” Her voice sounded thick even to her own ears.
He caught her earlobe between his teeth. “One night can feel like a very long time,” he said in a whisper.
“It won’t be so bad.”
“It could be, though.”
“Oh.” Brilliant conversation was beyond her when he touched her this way.
His lips nibbled at her ear and hot sensation spread though her. “I was thinking you might want to give me something to send me off.”
“Like what?” Not that she didn’t know exactly what he meant, but she was annoyed with him because he was so casual about letting her learn the truth.
“I was in a foul mood all morning,” Chase continued, “hurrying because I wanted to get home.” He laughed. “Wanting to rush home was a new experience.”
“What was the big hurry?”
“Do you honestly need me to say?” He gave another throaty chuckle. “I can’t get enough of you. We make love and instead of glorying in the satisfaction, I immediately start wondering when I can have you again. Have you put a spell on me?”
“No.” If anything she was the one who’d been enchanted.
He groaned. “Pete will be here in five minutes.”
She nodded, turning her head away.
“You’re crying,” he said with a frown. He held her face gently, brushing the hair from her brow, using his thumbs to wipe away the moisture on her cheeks.
She gazed up at him, blinking hard, hardly able to see him through her tears. Closing her eyes, she shook her head. “Go, or you’ll be late.”
“I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s wrong.”
“Pete’s coming.” She pushed him away.
“He’ll wait. Lesley, tell me what’s wrong.” He reached for an overnight bag, stuffing it with the essentials he’d need as he waited for her response.
She didn’t, couldn’t, respond.
“You’re upset because I have to leave you so soon,” he said, “but, sweetheart, I told you. It can’t be helped.”
She was so furious by this time that she clenched her fists at her sides. “Pete told me his wife didn’t last the winter. My sympathy was with Pete because of the weak woman he married. I was making all sorts of judgmental statements in my head, automatically blaming her. I blamed her, without the benefit of the doubt. I considered her weak and—”
“What does Pete’s marriage have to do with us?” Chase took her by the arms, studying her intensely. A horn honked outside and he cast an irritated look over his shoulder.
“Go,” she said again, freeing herself from his hold. “Just go.”
“I can’t, Lesley, not with you feeling like this.”
She swiped impatiently at her tears. “It might’ve helped if you’d let me know Twin Creeks is nothing more than…than a hole in the road. There are only five women here. Three of them are years older than I am, the fourth is a twelve-year-old girl and the other one is…me.”
The honking went on longer and more urgently this time.
“Go on,” she said, squaring her shoulders. “Pete’s waiting.”
Chase wavered, took one step toward the door, but then returned to her. “Will you be here when I get back?”
She had to think about that for a moment, then nodded.
He briefly closed his eyes. “Thank you for that.” He left without kissing her. Without touching her. And without saying goodbye.
* * *
Lesley ended up throwing out the chili she’d prepared for Chase. She’d never been fond of it herself, although Chase certainly seemed to be if his cupboard was any indication. There was an entire shelf filled with nothing but cans of chili.
She moved from one room to the next, feeling sorry for herself. She’d let the opportunity to really talk about their situation slip through her fingers.
Her cheeks burned at the memory. They’d kissed—and then fought. But their physical longing for each other hadn’t diminished.
Their relationship hadn’t started out that way. This was a new development. One that had taken them both by storm.
Lesley delighted in how frequently Chase wanted her. Her joy was made complete by the ready response he evoked in her. But their mutual passion meant she not only needed him, she’d become dependent on him. This was the very thing she’d come to fear with Tony—this total giving of herself. Yet it was what she’d done with Chase. He ruled her head and her heart, as thoroughly as Tony once had. No, even more so.
Was this love? She didn’t know. All she knew was that she couldn’t be without her husband, but didn’t want to lose herself in him.
Tucking her arms around her waist, she wondered how she’d ever manage to fill up the time without Chase.
* * *
Chase impatiently filled out the registration forms at the Fairbanks hotel. The sooner he finished, the sooner he could call Lesley.
He wanted to kick himself. He’d known from the moment he arrived home that something was bothering her. He’d seen it in her eyes and in the way she preoccupied herself with making him lunch. He should have settled things between them right then.
Once he had the key to his room, he glanced longingly at the coffee shop. He hadn’t eaten since breakfast and that had been a quick cup of coffee and a blueberry muffin.
He’d eat later, he decided, after he’d spoken to Lesley, after he’d explained, if that was possible. He couldn’t stand it if she left. She already meant too much to him.
He let himself into the stark hotel room and after dumping his overnight bag on the bed, sat on the edge of it and reached for the room phone. His hand was eager as he punched out the number.
She answered on the second ring.
“Lesley, hello.” Now that he could talk to her, he didn’t know what to say. The need to explain had burned in him the entire flight into Fairbanks, and now he was speechless.
“Chase?”
“I just got here.”
“How are you? Did you have a good flight?”
“I suppose so. How are you?” He needed to know that before he proceeded.
“Fine.”
The way she said it told him she wasn’t. “I realize it’s probably not a good idea to have this conversation over the phone.”
“We’ll talk later,” she said, but Chase was afraid that might be too late.
“I didn’t want this misunderstanding to ruin what we have.”
“And what do we have, Chase?” she asked, her voice a mere whisper.
“A marriage,” he returned without hesitation. “A fledgling marriage, which means we need to learn to communicate with each other. I’m going to need help.”
“We’ll learn,” she said, and there was a new strength in the words that reassured him.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you more about Twin Creeks. There always seemed to be other things to discuss and…it didn’t seem all that important.”
Lesley had no comment.
Chase pressed his hand to his forehead. “That isn’t true,” he said in a voice so low, he wondered if she could hear him. “I was afraid that if you did know you’d change your mind about marrying me.” He was taking one of the biggest risks of his life admitting it, but that was what made honesty of such high value. It was often expensive. But Lesley deserved nothing less.
“There’ll never be a teaching position for me here, will there?”
“No.” Once more the truth stabbed at him.
“What did you expect me to do with my time?”
“Whatever you want. You can take correspondence courses, teach them if you’d like. Sometime you might want to start a business. The internet’s created a lot of possibilities. Whatever you choose will have my full emo
tional and monetary support. More than anything else, I want you to be happy.”
“That all sounds good in theory, but I don’t know how it’ll work in practice.”
“Time will show us.” He felt as though he was fighting for his marriage. Either he convinced her here and now that he was serious or he’d lose her. Maybe not now but later, sometime down the road.
He couldn’t bear to think of his life without her. It seemed impossible that she could own his heart after so short a time. “Give us a chance—that’s all I’m asking.”
“All right,” she agreed in a whisper.
Chase scowled at the phone. He didn’t know if what he’d said had made a difference or not. All he could do was hope that it had.
* * *
Chase had told her there was beauty in every part of Alaska but that some of it wasn’t immediately obvious. The beauty around Twin Creeks was dark—that was how she’d describe it. Lesley stood outside his four-wheel-drive vehicle. She couldn’t shake the feeling that life was very fragile in this part of the world.
The colors she saw thrilled her. Wild splashes of vibrant orange, purple and red covered the grassy and lichened meadows. Pencil-thin waterfalls traced delicate vertical slopes, pooling into a clear lake. The valley wasn’t like the rain forest of western Washington, but it was filled with life.
A moose grazed in the distance and she wondered if the great beast was plagued by mosquitoes the same way she’d been. Pete wasn’t teasing when he’d warned her. These were the most irritating and persistent variety she’d ever encountered.
She’d found the keys to Chase’s truck in a kitchen drawer. After less than twenty-four hours on her own, she was going stir-crazy. Chase had been adamant about not exploring on her own, but she didn’t have much choice. If she had to stay inside the cabin one more minute, Lesley was convinced she’d go mad. Her books and other things hadn’t arrived, and she didn’t feel like emailing any of her friends. Not yet.
Anyway, it was time she introduced herself to the ladies of Twin Creeks, she’d decided, but she’d gotten sidetracked on her way into town.
The sight of the moose had captivated her and she’d parked on the side of the road to watch.
She’d soon become engrossed in the landscape. She lingered there, enjoying the beauty but aware of the dangers. After a while, she climbed back inside the truck and drove to town.
Twin Creeks itself didn’t amount to much. She’d visited rest stops that were bigger than this town. She counted three buildings—a combination grocery store and gas station, a tavern and a tiny post office. There wasn’t even a church.
The sidewalks, if she could call them that, were made of wooden boards that linked the three main structures. She saw a handful of houses in the distance.
Lesley parked and turned off the engine. A face peered out from behind the tattered curtains in the tavern. She pretended she hadn’t noticed and got out of the truck, walking toward the grocery. If she remembered correctly, Thelma Davis ran the store.
“Hello,” Lesley said to the middle-aged woman behind the counter, determined to be friendly. “I’m Lesley Goodman, Chase’s wife.”
“Thelma Davis.”
Lesley glanced around. Thelma’s business must be prospering. She not only carried food and cleaning supplies, but rented DVDs, sold yarn and other craft supplies, in addition to a smattering of just about everything else.
“Heard this morning that Chase got married,” Thelma said, coming around the counter. “Welcome to Twin Creeks. Everyone around here is fond of Chase and we hope you’ll be real happy.”
“Thank you.”
“Ever been to Alaska before? Don’t answer that. I can see you haven’t. You’ll never be colder in your life, that much I can promise you. Some say this is really what hell will be like. Personally, I don’t intend on finding out.”
“How long have you lived here?” Lesley asked.
Thelma squinted. “We were one of the first ones to move up this way when word came that the pipeline was going through. I was just a young married. That’s, oh, more than forty years now. We love it, but the winters take some getting used to.”
That Lesley could believe.
“We’ll want to have a party for you two. I hope you don’t mind us throwing a get-together in your honor. There isn’t a lot of entertainment here, but we do our best to have fun.”
“I love parties.”
Thelma’s hands rested on her hips. “We’ll have it at our house, since we’ve got the biggest living room in town. Are you and Chase thinking of starting a family soon? It’s been years since we had a baby born in Twin Creeks.”
“Ah…” Lesley wasn’t sure how to answer that.
“Forgive me, Lesley, I shouldn’t be pressuring you about babies. It’s just that we’re so happy to have another woman, especially a young one.”
“I’m pleased to meet you, too.”
“If you have a minute I’ll call Margaret and get Heather and we’ll have coffee and talk. Do you have time for that? Everyone’s dying to meet you, even Gladys. We’re eager to do whatever we can to make you feel welcome.”
“I’d love to meet everyone.” The sooner the better. If Chase was going to be away often, her link with the others would be vital to her sanity.
“I knew I was going to like you.” Thelma grinned. “The minute Pete mentioned Chase had brought back a wife and described you, I knew we’d be good friends. I think Pete’s half smitten with you himself, which to my way of thinking is good. It’s about time the men in this community thought about getting married and starting families. That’s what Twin Creeks really needs.”
Lesley couldn’t agree more.
She stayed to meet the other women and by the time she left they’d talked for two hours. Rarely had Lesley been more impressed with anyone. They were like frontier women—resourceful, independent, with a strong sense of community. After the first half hour with the others, Lesley felt as if she’d known them all her life. The genuine warmth of her welcome was exactly what she needed. When she returned to the house, she felt excited to be part of this small but thriving community.
Lesley wasn’t home more than five minutes when the phone rang. She answered it eagerly, thinking it would be Chase. There was so much she wanted to tell him.
“Hello.”
“Lesley, it’s your mother.” Their conversations invariably started with June Campbell-Sterne announcing her parental status as if Lesley had forgotten.
“Mom?” She couldn’t have been more shocked if Daisy had arrived on her doorstep.
“It’s true then, isn’t it? You’re married and living with some crazy man in Alaska.”
“Mom, it isn’t as bad as it sounds.” She should’ve tried phoning them again, had planned to, but she’d been too involved in becoming familiar with her new environment.
“When Tony contacted us—”
“Tony?” Lesley said, fuming. Daisy had warned her that her former fiancé was up to no good, but she’d never dreamed he’d resort to contacting her family to make trouble.
“Tony was kind enough to call us and let us know you’d gotten married, which is more than I can say for you.”
“Trust me, Mom, Tony did not have my best interests at heart.”
“I don’t believe that.”
“He’s being jealous and spiteful.”
Her mother breathed in deeply as if she was trying to control her temper. “Is it true that you married a man who advertised for a wife on a Seattle billboard?”
“Mom…”
“It is true?”
“Yes, but I didn’t answer his ad, if that’s what you’re thinking. I know you’re hurt,” she said, trying to diffuse her mother’s disappointment and anger, “and I apologize for not letting you know, but Chase only had a few days left in Seattle and you and Ken were traveling and I tried to call your cell and—”
“As it happened, we returned early, but you didn’t know that because you
just assumed we were gone. You’re my only child. Didn’t you stop to think that I’d want to be at your wedding?”
“Mom, I’m sorry.”
“Tony says you don’t even know the man you married. That you weren’t in your right mind. He sounded very worried about you.”
“None of that’s true. I’m very happy with Chase.”
“I won’t believe that until I see you for myself and meet this man you’ve married. Ken’s already made the flight arrangements for me. I’ll be leaving first thing tomorrow morning and landing in Fairbanks at some horrible hour. I have no idea how to reach Twin Creeks from there, but I’ll manage if I have to go by dogsled.”
“I’ll fly down and meet you in Fairbanks,” Lesley said, thinking quickly. “Then we’ll fly back together.” She wanted Chase to meet her mother, but she would rather have waited until they’d settled into their lives together.
“All right.” Some of the defensiveness was gone from her mother’s voice.
“If you’d like to talk to someone about me and Chase, I suggest you contact Daisy instead of Tony.”
“It broke my heart when you ended your engagement to Tony,” her mother said.
“Mother, he married someone else! I didn’t end the engagement—he did. Despite the claims he’s making now.”
“Look what’s happened to you. Just look.”
“Mother! I’m married to a wonderful man.”
“As I said, I’ll judge that for myself. See you tomorrow.” She gave her arrival time and Lesley wrote it down on a pad by the phone. Now all she needed to do was find a way of reaching Fairbanks and meeting her mother’s plane.
* * *
Chase clutched his cell phone so hard, he was afraid he might break it. “What do you mean she isn’t at the house?” he demanded, scowling at Pete’s unsatisfactory response. He’d spent the most frustrating day of his life, first having to deal with the motor company and then attempting to contact Lesley. He’d tried repeatedly that afternoon with no answer.
There were any number of reasons she might not have answered the phone, but he’d started to worry. Two hours of no response, and he was beside himself. He’d called Pete and had his friend drive over and check out the cabin for himself.
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