Shadows

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Shadows Page 18

by Amber Lacie


  I will. I want to tell her in person. I see Kayla. Ttyl. Xxoo

  I don't wait for his response. Kayla walks by wiping her nose. Has she been crying?

  "Kayla, wait! What is going on?"

  "Like you don't know! Thanks for reporting me to the boss. She said there was a miscommunication between Anne and her. I don't know. I saw the chat messages. It was your name. I know what I saw. Then she informed me you told her I violated protocol by talking about employees outside of work. What the hell, Eve? Why the fuck would you throw me under the bus like that?"

  "I never said you broke protocol. She said she left Anne a letter. I told her you never mentioned one." My eyes go wide. I did throw her under the bus, I should never have mentioned her name. "Kayla, I'm so sorry. It wasn't intentional. I just. I’m sorry. I wasn't thinking."

  "Well, that's kind of obvious, isn't it?" Taking a deep breath, she rubs her face with her hands. "Listen, I love you. We've been friends forever, but you need to get your damn head out of the clouds. You are so wrapped up with your new boyfriend and in your new life, you can't even see what's going on around you."

  "What am I missing?"

  "Well, for starters you could at least act like you just lost one of your best friends. It hasn't even been two weeks yet and you've forgotten him."

  "Fuck you, Kayla. You have no idea how hard it is for me to function. I can barely breathe. All I can do is push it all away."

  "You're doing a fucking great job of it. Theron must be amazing if he can make you forget a friend's death."

  "Go to hell, Kayla! I need him. He's the only reason I'm holding my shit together. You have no clue what it's like to feel your heart ripped out."

  "You dumb bitch! You have always had the perfect little charmed life. Everything has always been so easy and perfect for you. Someone dies and you lose your shit. You’ve changed. You’ve become completely self-involved. I don’t even know who you are anymore. Matt was my friend too, damn it! All three of us were inseparable, or have you forgotten that too? You, know what? Don't fucking answer that. I’m done with you.” Her shoulder slams into mine as she walks away.

  "Where are you going?"

  "Lunch. I still get a lunch, right? Is that against protocol? I wouldn't want you to run to the boss and rat me out again." Flipping me off, she slams the front door to the office.

  My heart is racing. I'm so fucking furious right now. How could she think I forgot about Matt?

  "Well, that was interesting." Bridgette stands behind me. I know she must have saw everything. This just keeps getting worse. I stare at the door. I really want to go after Kayla, but we both need to calm down. I need to get out of here first.

  "Yeah. Interesting. Look, Bridgette, we really need to talk."

  "And we will. I figured you might be put off by everything today, so I made a reservation at Talmon's. Grab your things and we'll head out."

  "Talmon's? How is that even possible? They are booked months in advance."

  "I used to date the head chef, I pulled some strings. Get your things, I'll drive."

  Ignoring the last part about her driving, I grab my purse and log out of my computer. Taking a quick look around my desk, I grab the picture of Robert and me at the beach, the books I have tucked around my desk, and I take a couple stacks of sticky notes. Who doesn't need sticky notes? Making sure I have everything, I head to the parking lot with my keys in my hand. Bridgette is waiting by a sporty looking silver BMW.

  "Is this yours?"

  "No it's…well, let's just call him a friend for now. Are you not coming with?" She nods to the keys in my hand.

  "No, I need to stop at the pharmacy, so I'm going to drive separate." She smiles sweetly at me, but I swear I see her left eye twitch.

  I pull up to Talmon's and park the car myself. Bridgette pulls up to the valet, but I want to be able to leave quickly if I need to. I feel my phone vibrate in my purse as I sling it over my shoulder. It's Theron. I don’t read his message, but I send him a text.

  Can't talk. With my boss now. I'll text you if I need saving. Love you. Xxoo

  Come home now. Please.

  Can't babe. Ttyl

  Dropping my phone back into my purse, I walk into the restaurant. I have never actually eaten here before. It is way out of my price range and from my understanding the salads are made from dandelions. I have no reason to eat that crap. I prefer burgers and fries. The hostess seats me at our table directly across from Bridgette, who's already enjoying a glass of red wine. Isn't it a little early for that?

  "Ms. Clarks, I would like to clear the air about somethings."

  "Eve, just because it's a business lunch doesn't mean we have to be all formal. Please, call me Bridgette."

  I sigh. She is not making this easy. "Bridgette, I'm sorry, but I can't accept the position. I'm afraid this is my notice. I already collected my things, and I won't be coming back to the office today. This is rather unprofessional and I realize this, but it's my final decision."

  Setting her glass of wine down, Bridgette straightens the silverware placed in front of her. "I'm rather shocked. I never imagined you backing down from a raise or management experience. However, as off putting at this conversation is, I would still like us to be friends. I admire your loyalty to your friends. I wish I had people who do the same for me." A tear falls down her cheek and she wipes it away.

  "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

  "Oh, it's not you honey. Will you stay for lunch? I could really use some girl advice, and I don't have anyone else to turn to."

  Not wanting to upset her or leave her feeling like this, I nod my head in agreement.

  "Thank you so much. Now if you'll just excuse me for a minute, I need to pull myself together."

  While Bridgette's in the bathroom, I decide to check my phone. I have four messages from Theron, each one increasingly getting angrier. The last one is in all caps.

  WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU? COME. HOME. NOW. LEAVE. NOW

  Not wanting to anger him any further, I send him a text.

  I'm at Talmon's. I just told my boss I quit. She took it rather well.

  Beautiful, please leave now. Grab your luggage and go.

  It's not luggage. It's my purse. Thank you for your concern. I'll be leaving shortly.

  Please do.

  I will. Bridgette is in the bathroom. As soon as she's back, ok?

  Bridgette? WHO THE FUCK IS BRIDGETTE?

  Bridgette Clarks is my boss.

  You need to listen to me right now. Don't say another word to her, leave now.

  Ok. But she’s coming back to the table now.

  Fuck It. I'm coming to get you.

  I roll my eyes. What am I supposed to do while I wait for him? Bridgette sits down and I can tell she's been crying, her eyes are red and puffy. "Everything okay?"

  "As good as it can be. I started seeing this new guy. We were supposed to go out last night, but he never showed. Now I find out my ex-fiancé is dating some rotten spoiled brat. She's absolutely horrid and taking complete advantage of him. His family can't stand her either. I don't know what he's sees in her. She's a complete selfish bitch."

  "Wow, um, I'm so sorry. I don’t know what to say. How long were you and your ex together?"

  "Two years, but we've known each other longer. Our families are really close."

  "I can't imagine how that feels."

  "The worst part is I'm still in love with him. Everything was set to go, and he got in a fight with his parents. He called it off and I never heard from him again. He shut everyone out. He is an amazing guy and now he's sleeping with some slut." Blowing her nose into her napkin, she looks around.

  I'm assuming she's looking to see if anyone is taking notice of her, but then I see an evil dark look take over her features. She sits back with grin on her face, which I'm sure the devil created. My stomach feels heavy as if it's full of stones weighing me down, pulling me under water. I feel like I'm drowning.

  "Hello, Theron."<
br />
  Everything is in slow motion. I barely register her saying his name, as I turn around to spot Theron coming up behind me. The look of worry and desperation is plainly written all over his face. How would Bridgette know his name? Then it hits me. I'm the slut. I'm the selfish bitch her ex fiancé is sleeping with. "What the fuck is this?" I wave my finger back and forth between them. She continues to sneer at me, and Theron drops his head.

  "Beautiful.”

  Holding up my hand, I cut him off. "Do not call me, beautiful. What the fuck is going on? You were engaged?"

  Bridgette gasps, but I refuse to look at her. Everything is making sense. She was punishing me for being with Theron by attempting to destroy my relationship with my friends. She lets out an eerie maniacal laugh, "It's her. This is the one you refused to let go of. This is your beautiful girl you fell in love with? For Christ sakes, Theron. You were what? Twelve? Thirteen? You didn't know what love is. All you had was a friend who didn’t tease you because of your eyes. You are such a freak. Wait until I tell your dad about this. He's going to love this! I hope he destroys the both of you!"

  Theron stands beside me clenching and unclenching his fists. Anger, frustration, and hatred are emanating from him. "Screw off, Bridgette. Nobody gives a shit about your plastic ass. I have no idea how you are involved with all of this, but I will find out. You will regret this."

  "The only thing I regret is sleeping with you. Is he rough with you, Eve? Does he tie you up, too? Do you want to know why he does that? It's because he's not right in his head. His dad always said he was a freak. Now, I understand why."

  Turning my head back and forth, I look between Theron and Bridgette. They were engaged. He was engaged. She still loves him. I've just hit my breaking point. My head is swirling. He knew it was me all along. I was the one who didn't remember, I was the one left in the dark. What other secrets does he have? This is too much, too soon. Shaking my head back forth, I stand at the table. "I have to go. I can’t do this."

  Theron looks straight in to my eyes, his fear obvious. "Can't do what, beautiful?"

  "Don't. Don't you dare call me, that! You were engaged Theron! That might be something you tell your girlfriend before she moves in. You knew who I was. I've dreamt about a boy with sunglasses so many times, and I just recently had suspicions it was you. I thought you didn’t remember, but you knew this whole time." A sudden realization dawns on me and I run for the front door. Theron runs after me, grabbing my arm as I reach the sidewalk. "Let go!"

  "No. Not until you talk to me."

  "Tell me why you were there."

  "Why I was where?"

  "At the laundromat Theron. Why were you there? I know you have a washer and dryer, hell you could even have used your gram's. Oh my, God. You were stalking me! That's so fucked up. Is that why you were there that night at the restaurant?"

  "I just wanted a chance to tell you who I was, but then everything went to shit. I didn't want to mess you up or hurt you anymore than you already were."

  "What gives you the right to determine what will or will not hurt me? You kept secrets from me. You were engaged before and kept it to yourself. Now, I find out us meeting wasn't even a coincidence?" Yanking my arm from his grasp, I open my car door. "How long Theron?"

  "Maybe six months, I don't know. I saw you at a bookstore. Then, they said your name and I knew I found you again. I wasn't going to let you go."

  "You followed me around for six months? What the hell? You could have just said hello, or introduced yourself, but instead you stalk me for six months. Then, you make me fall in love with you, invite me to move in, and convince me I need you. Did you think I wouldn’t find out? I hate secrets, Theron! Secrets are made to be broken. That's how I feel right now. You broke me." He clings to my door as I slide into my seat.

  "Wait, please, I love you. Let's go home, we can talk this out." His hands fall to his side, he must know he's lost this battle.

  "Oh, I'm going home, just not to yours. I'm going to my mom's. It's where I should have been all along." Slamming my door, I start my car. Tears stream down my face as I glance back at Theron in my mirrors. He's just standing there, not moving, with his hands behind his head. My fireworks have just exploded in my face, and I have definitely been burned.

  Chapter 15

  I'm lying in my bed at my parent's house, hiding under the covers. Anger, tears, anger and more tears consume me. It seems as though my heart and mind are having it out. It's been three days. I haven't left my parents’ house except for my visit to my doctor. It turns out I need to make an appointment with an orthopedic surgeon just to make sure it's healing right. They gave me a business card with a number on it. I'm supposed to call and make an appointment, but I don't want to talk to anyone let alone leave the house.

  I hear my door open, but I won't come out. I'm hiding from the secrets which are now exposed, eating away at what's left of my heart. Pressing my palm to my chest, I check to make sure it's still beating. I can feel it thump with my hand, but on the inside it feels void. My dreams are hellish. The boy with the sunglasses is constantly taken from me, but he's different every time. I watch him get dragged away, his sunglasses fall off, and then suddenly I'm looking at Matt. The next time it will be Theron. I can honestly say I've loved them both, it may be in different ways, but I've loved both. Burying my face into my pillow, I wonder what would have happened if Matt would have said something sooner. Could I have loved him like I love Theron? The idea takes off and courses through my mind with the possibility, but my heart thumps a steady "no".

  Someone sighs. They can't make me come out of here. I'm not ready. Theron would have pulled me out of my self-pity by now. He'd probably tell me he loves me, but I stink. Tears fall softly from my eyes as I remember the first time he said he loved me.

  "Evelyn, you need to be done with this. Feeling sorry for yourself is never going to help you heal. Robert is coming by for you. I packed a bag."

  Coming by for me? Are they kicking me out? What kind of parent does that? Slowly sitting up, I pull the covers down from my face. "Are you making me leave? I have to go?"

  My mom wrings her hands in her apron. The fact of her even wearing an apron makes me smile, just a little. I remember being in high school and asking her why she always wears aprons. I will never forget her response, "Aprons help me carry in fresh food from the garden, grab hot pans from the oven, dry my hands, and most importantly they wipe your tears when you are hurt." I never fully understood it until now. I so badly want to be little again, so my mom could wipe away my tears and pull me into her arms. As an adult my tears may come less frequently, but they fall even harder now.

  "No. I don't want you to go, but what am I to do? You won't eat. You won't tell me anything. You just sit in here and cry. Robert and you have always had an unspoken connection. You can read each other like books. When you were little, you always comforted each other by trying to make the other one laugh. I don't know how it feels to lose two people in such a short time. Robert wants you to come stay with him, even if it's just for a couple days."

  I flop back down on my back, throwing my arms over my face. This sucks. Theron sucks. Everything sucks ass right now. "Fine. I'll go, but I'm not happy about being shipped off."

  "No one is asking you to be happy. We just want you to eat and possibly shower. You're an adult, and you need to start figuring out where you are going from here."

  Refusing to look at my mom, I hear her sigh and leave the room. Deciding to just get this over with, I grab some clothes, and head to the shower. It helps a little, but it’s nothing like Theron's shower. I'm going to have to find a job that pays well, because I definitely need a better shower. I've been spoiled.

  I'm going through the bag my mom packed me, and double checking my purse for everything I need, when Robert walks in. Not saying a word he sits at the end of the bed. I look around my room once more. It was my bedroom for nineteen years, but it feels so strange to me. I walk over to my closet to shut th
e doors, when I notice a box on the floor labeled Matt's. "What's this?"

  Robert closes his eyes, looking down towards the floor he sighs, "That would be a box."

  I glare at him. "I know it's a box."

  "It's from Matt. He had it in his closet, the other side has Evelyn written on it. I figured you wouldn't want it in the garage, so I brought it in here."

  "Oh." I stare at it for a few minutes, chewing on my bottom lip. "Did you open it? Do you know what's in it?"

  "No, my name isn't on the box."

  "Oh." My stomach feels sick, wiping off my sweaty palms on my jeans, I pick up the box.

  "Stop! You shouldn't lift it with your hand."

  I turn around holding it with my good hand. "It's fine. It's very light."

  "Are you taking it?"

  "I don't know." I just stand there holding the box looking at Robert. Neither of us speak. Grabbing my bag, he slings my purse over his shoulder, causing a laugh to escape my lips. "That looks good on you. It really brings out the color in your eyes."

  "Shut up, Eve. Just carry your box and keep your comments to yourself." Turning around, he walks through the door with me following close behind. We are walking through the living room towards the front door when my dad spots us.

  "Robert, I have to say that's a rather nice purse you have." I giggle again, and Robert turns to look at me over his shoulder. His stare is deadly and I quickly break eye contact. "Evelyn, let him put your things in the car while we talk for a few minutes." I roll my eyes. I don't want to talk about anything. Robert takes the box from my arms and loads everything into my car. "Say what you need to say, Dad."

  "I want you to know, your mother and I both love you very much. I'm not sure what happened between you and Theron, but maybe you should just take some time to yourself for a while. Maybe you guys rushed into things. It's just something to think about." He wraps me in his arms, squeezing me tightly. "I love you, sweet pea."

  "I love you, too." He lets me go as my mom walks up beside him. She gives me an encouraging smile as I leave. I slide into my car and give Robert a nod of my head. I follow him to his house, which surprisingly isn't that far. My parents live close to the beach, but not on it. It's a good ten minute walk from their back porch to the beach. Robert's house is directly on the beach. His driveway is steep so I make sure to use my emergency brake as I park. It's a quaint two story beach house. It has a small garage and a wraparound porch. There's a set of wooden steps off the side of the porch that lead to the back of the house and bottom of the sand dune. As I lean against my car I notice how quiet it is, despite being so close to a public beach. Of course, it's only spring so it's likely to change once summer comes. Robert parked in the garage and is pulling the door down as I unlock my trunk. There's no sense in waiting for him. I don't have much since I am now stretched between three separate houses. I should probably get my things from Theron, but I would have to talk to him and I'm not ready for that.

 

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