The Wicked and the Witless coaaod-5

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The Wicked and the Witless coaaod-5 Page 23

by Hugh Cook


  Trap or no trap,' said Jarl, 'we have to come down from the Eagle Pass if we're to finish off Tor. Either we descend or we end our campaign right here and now.' 'What do you recommend?' said Sarazin.

  'I make no recommendations,' said Jarl, 'for I am but a simple military policeman who knows nothing of war.'

  TJon't be like that!' said Sarazin. 'Have I done something to offend you, or what?'

  He was upset that Jarl should be so dour and sour when he, Sarazin, was happy, victorious, on top of the world.

  There's no quarrel between us,' said Jarl, 'but here I'm as ignorant as you are. I've never been to Hok, I know nothing of this Tor and I cannot predict the future. Perhaps we'll find the camp Heth speaks of. Perhaps we'll find an ambush. We don't know. Such is war – and you must live with it.'

  Whatever decision Sarazin took he must take it quickly, for his men had but a single day's rations left. He longed to order all his men to march south to war and victory. But memories of various disasters in Tyte made him cautious. His seizure of the Eagle Pass might be a single isolated lucky stroke, a one-off fluke. He decided to hedge his bets.

  In the end, Sarazin sent a third of his soldiers back to the baggage wagons with the prisoners (though Sarazin kept Heth with him, thinking the peasant potentially useful as a hostage). When that party reached the baggage wagons, some would stay to guard the prisoners while the rest returned with food.

  Meanwhile, all Sarazin's soldiers divested themselves of all their rations. These rations were then divided among the one third of Sarazin's men who would stay to hold the Eagle Pass.

  The remaining third would march without rations under Sarazin's command to attack the unprotected camp which, so Heth alleged, lay not far to the south. If the camp truly existed they would be able to feed off its supplies, while if the enemy lay waiting in ambush food would be no help to them. 'What do you think of my plan?' said Sarazin.

  But Jarl refused to comment until Sarazin had given his orders and the lead contingent was marching south with Jarl and Sarazin at its head. Both Glambrax and Elkin insisted on coming with them.

  As Sarazin and Jarl marched at the head of the invasion force – both leading their horses, for the ground was too rough for them to ride – Jarl said: 'What do you hope to achieve by your orders?'

  'Why, to make sure that whatever I lose I don't lose everything. This way I at least keep control of the Eagle Pass, even if I lose my life.' 'Fair enough,' said Jarl. 'But what was your mission?' 'To seek out Tor and destroy him.'

  'True,' said Jarl. 'Doesn't that mean you must inevitably force a major battle? All your men against all of his?'

  Sarazin was already regretting his caution. He should have taken all his men on this march to the south. This was how a hero would have done it. To save face, he said:

  'I've decided on a scorched-earth policy. I'm going to starve the ogre out. That's the way I'll destroy him. This raid is the first move in my scorched-earth campaign.'

  Jarl absorbed that in silence. After a while, Sarazin said anxiously: 'Am I doing the right thing or the wrong thing?'

  'It's not what you do,' said Jarl, 'it's how you justify it when you get back to Selzirk. I've seen a lot of famous victories which were actually no more than draws – a couple of them were in fact defeats!'

  Well worry about Selzirk when we get back there alive,' said Sarazin.

  'No!' said Jarl. 'Start writing your history now. This is what happened. By a skilful forced march you took the enemy by surprise. You seized the Eagle Pass. You estab- lished a base on the heights. Then you yourself led a reconnaissance in force while your subordinates were busy bringing up the supplies necessary to support a determined thrust deep into enemy territory.'

  'Why,' said Sarazin, in admiration, 'that sounds really good.'

  'Of course it does,' said Jarl. 'With the right line in storytelling, you can make the worst defeat into a triumph of courageous, dynamic soldiering.'

  Then Jarl – apparently taking this very seriously – drilled Sarazin endlessly on precisely what he should say on his return to Selzirk. This surprised Sarazin greatly. Jarl was a soldier through and through, and, under the circumstances, Sarazin would have expected him to be concentrating all his attention on the here and now. Finally, unable to restrain his curiosity, Sarazin asked: 'Why do you care how our history is told in Selzirk?'

  'I care,' said Jarl, "because of the political implications of the telling.' And he refused to be drawn further on the subject.

  Sarazin's men came down from the Eagle Pass into the Willow Vale, an expansive valley of rough-grass sheeplands, studded with outcrops of grey granite and clumps of trees and shrubbery. They found the camp Heth had spoken of – a hutment of a hundred or so shacks.

  The enemy were evacuating the camp when Sarazin's men attacked. The foemen fled, leaving Sarazin in uncon- tested possession of the camp. The spoils of war amounted to a dead dog, two crippled crones, a bawling baby with two heads, a considerable amount of rice, flour, mutton and salt fish, and, of course, the huts themselves.

  Sarazin was exhilarated. This was completely unlike the baffling, despairing campaigning he had done in the marshlands of Tyte. He was winning. Again he wished he had all six hundred of his men with him instead of just a third of them.

  'Let's take what we can carry, burn the rest and go back where we came from,' said Jarl.

  'No,' said Sarazin. There were women and children here. Valuable hostages. They can't have gone far. We'll give pursuit.'

  He had won two victories without losing a single man. He was ready to dare. And his soldiers, when they knew it was women they were chasing, happily dared with him. Dragging Heth with them, they pursued the refugees south. But found them not.

  By dayfail they had overtaken – and captured – five enemy warriors. Then, exhausted, they set up camp under some trees. It rained all night; the trees gave little shelter; and, in the sodden dawn, Sarazin found his high spirits had evaporated. Now he paid heed to Jarl's counsels of caution and marched his men back towards the Eagle Pass, taking along Heth and the handful of prisoners won on the previous day.

  But, on retreating, they found the way to the Eagle Pass barred by four hundred assorted enemy footsoldiers and cavalrymen. The enemy had outflanked them by night, cutting off their escape. 'You're doomed!' said Heth.

  'Rubbishl' said Jarl. 'The forces are equal, and the odds in battle equal also.'

  'Better force a fight quickly then,' said Heth, 'for Tor commands three thousand men, many more of whom will be here shortly, doubtless.' 'Nonsense!' said Jarl. But Sarazin could tell he was worried.

  Since delay would only worsen their position, Sarazin ordered his men to attack immediately. They refused. While Jarl stoutly maintained the odds were even, any fool could see the enemy outnumbered them two to one. Sarazin and Jarl faced the untrusty two hundred.

  'What do you want to do?' said Jarl. 'Stand here and die?'

  'No!' cried an unhero, anonymous amongst his com- rades. 'Stand here and surrender!'

  Sarazin was most unhappy. From conqueror glorious to miserable captive in a single day – the thought was unbearable. He looked at Elkin, who shook his head. Doubtless, if asked for a display of wizardry, Elkin would say that no single wizard of Ebber could subvert the will of hundreds of belligerent, determined enemy soldiers.

  'Very well,' said Jarl. 'But let's at least get the best terms we can for our surrender.' 'What kind of terms?' yelled someone.

  'Wine rations, bread rations, fish rations, women rations,' said Jarl. The basics. Let's march away west lest we're attacked on the spot. Then we can stand our ground amidst the rocks and negotiate.'

  Jarl eventually cajoled the men into withdrawing west rather than surrendering. Why west? Sarazin could not guess, but hoped Jarl had something in mind. He watched, anxiously, to see what the enemy would do. The foe followed. A steady rain fell from dismal death-grey skies. It was summer, but that was the merest technicality: it had grown cold enoug
h to pass for winter easily.

  The enemy never showed the slightest intention of attacking – which suggested to Sarazin that the enemy commander was content to wait for reinforcements and expected to receive such shortly. Sarazin's men grumbled incessantly, and a couple wept. The prisoners – except for Heth – were quiet and apprehensive, doubtless fearful of being murdered.

  Heth, cheerfully telling Sarazin about the beating he could expect if he delayed surrendering, was silent himself after Jarl clouted him a couple of times.

  By late afternoon, it was clear the retreat was taking them into a steadily-narrowing western arm of the Willow Vale. The sheer escarpments to the north offered no prospect of escape. Finally, at dayfail, Jarl revealed his plan.

  Jarl made some prefatory remarks about duty, courage, heroism and such – he was speaking, perhaps, with the history books in mind. Then he mentioned sacrifice.

  'You want a sacrifice?' yelled someone from the rear ranks. I'd give you my mother-in-law to sacrifice, only the bitch is dead already.'

  There followed laughter – which had nothing nice about it.

  'Who said that?' demanded Sarazin. 'What's that man's name?' 'His name is legion,' said a shout. 'Legion, legion,' roared half a hundred throats.

  Upon which all two hundred took up the nonsensical one-word slogan. This was the battle-cry of outright mutiny.

  "Never mind who said it,' declared Jarl, as the noise died down. 'Let's talk survival. Westward, this arm of the Willow Vale narrows further. Eventually we run into a cliff. But there is a gate in that cliff. The gate opens into a tunnel. The tunnel leads to safety.'

  An anonymous unhero declared that nobody was in any mood for fairytales.

  This is no fairytale,' said Jarl. The secrets of gate and tunnel were researched by old Epelthin Elkin in Narba. He-'

  But Jarl was shouted down by the men, who thought he was bluffing, and meant to march them on hoping to chance upon a path over the mountains. None of the cat- bath-bedraggled foot sloggers were prepared to go another step on such an offchance. Finally, Sarazin appealed for silence.

  There are two ways we can handle this,' said he. You can mutiny here and now, which means you'll be tried for high treason if you ever get back to Selzirk.'

  That provoked some rock-throwing. Some of the rocks were quite large – but Sarazin ducked efficiently. When permitted to speak again he said:

  'Alternatively, I can order you to surrender. Not now, but tomorrow morning. Then you'd be safe on your return to Selzirk. What's more, as prisoners you'll get one day's pay for every ten you spend in captivity. Not a fortune – but money in your pockets all the same. So what do you want? Mutiny now, and exile from Selzirk forever? Or surrender tomorrow and take prisoners' pay if you ever get back home?' What's the catch?' cried a man.

  "No catch,' said Sarazin. 'Just hold this ground till dawn while I race for the west. With me will go Thodric Jarl – and any other man who lusts for freedom.'

  You've got a deal,' declared one of the soldiers, and this sentiment was duly seconded, voted on and confirmed.

  Thus Sarazin and Jarl escaped to the west by night, taking with them Heth – their most valuable prisoner. Their only other companions were Epelthin Elkin and the dwarf Glambrax.

  Sarazin was shocked by the speed of events. He had gone from being a victorious commander to a hunted fugitive in scarcely no time at all. Anxiously, he asked Jarl: 'This gate, this tunnel – do they really exist?' 'Ask Elkin,' said Jarl. 'He's the scholar.'

  Was Elkin's scholarship accurate? It must bel Otherwise,

  Sean Sarazin might shortly die. He said as much to Elkin when they halted about midnight to rest their horses. 'Your life?' said Elkin. 'My life is at stake here too.'

  Then drew Sarazin away from the others and said to him, in an urgent whisper:

  'Remember, Jarl thinks me a scholar. Only you know me as a wizard. If Jarl learns as much it will prove my death for certain. Whatever we find to the west, remember – never speak to me as a wizard. To do so would be to slay me.' You can trust me,' said Sarazin.

  Thoroughly bewildered by this. What would they find to the west? Something other than a gate and a tunnel? And why would their discovery spark talk of wizardry? And why would Jarl kill Elkin if he knew him for a wizard?

  Towards dawn – a miserable dawn of driving rain and rising wind – Sarazin finally remembered Jarl's first audience with Farfalla. The Rovac warrior, offered the position of Master of Combat for the Watch, had taken umbrage because the salary was denominated in wizard coinage. He had spoken of a feud of long standing between wizards and the Rovac.

  Great! Not only was Sarazin running for his life, but he was also embroiled in a mysterious feud between the ruthless wizards of the Confederation and the homicidal mercenaries of Rovac!

  Through dawn's grey rainlight they roughed on over rain- slide rocks until their mounts broke down entirely and had to be turned loose. On they went by foot.

  'Cut me loose,' said Heth, whose hands were tied behind his back. 'I need my hands to steady myself.' 'AH right,' said Jarl, cutting Heth free. Immediately, the peasant sprinted for freedom. 'Stop!' shouted Sarazin. But Heth ran on. Thwap!!

  A bolt from Glambrax's crossbow slammed into a sapling just to the left of Heth's ear. Waterdrops thick- splattered down from the sapling's leaves. Heth glanced back, saw Glambrax already recocking his crossbow – and halted. 'I give up,' said Heth. Jarl advanced on him looking grim. 'Don't kill him!' said Sarazin.

  'I will, unless he swears himself to our escape,' said Jarl. 'By all means!' said Heth hastily.

  And duly swore to do all in his power to help the fugitives escape alive and uninjured (and, for Jarl was thorough when it came to formulating oaths, unhexed, unfrightened and in the best possible state of health and wealth), and not to try to escape himself no matter what the temptation or provocation.

  'IJnth!' said Glambrax, cursing in an uncouth tongue unknown to any of the others. 'A hunting party comes! For us, I warrant!'

  Indeed, looking back they saw a full three dozen soldiers in the distance. Friends or enemies? Probably Glambrax was right and they were enemies.

  'So our men betrayed us,' said Sarazin bitterly. 'They surrendered as soon as we were gone.'

  'Don't be so quick to judge,' said Jarl. "Mayhap one crept away from the rest to betray us. Or the enemy attacked once we had left. Or perhaps among our enemies there are wizards or witches who read our thoughts and acted accordingly.'

  'Friend Jarl has a mind with analytical powers formid- able,' said Elkin. 'But-' 'Save it,' said Sarazin. 'We know the rest.'

  And he set off for the west, thinking to set a crack- ing pace. But geography conspired against speed. They shouldered through thickets, fought brambles and dared uprearing rocks. Were they still being pursued? Was the enemy gaining on them? It was impossible to say.

  They marched till old man Elkin was utterly exhausted, and the others not much better. Even though life and liberty were at stake, they could go no further. Jarl led them into the thickest undergrowth available, and there they huddled like so many pigs.

  The daylight faltered as the rain worsened. The ground ran wet with water. The wind came sluicing and slicing from all directions, swirling away all chance of dreams with gusts and buffets of water-slap. The dullsky day darkened at length to night – a night of sleepless misery which beggars description.

  By dawn, Sarazin felt a good half century older. But roused himself to his feet, helped eat the last of their food, then bravely led the march onward. It was march or perish: for unless they reached sanctuary soon they would die on their feet. He was sure of it. He was right.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

  The fugitives: Sean Sarazin (the man who would be king); Thodric Jarl (Rovac warrior and military policeman); Epelthin Elkin (scholar and wizard of Ebber); Glambrax (Sarazin's dwarf servant and son of the witch Zelafona); Heth (blond peasant from Stokos, a commander loyal to the ogre Tor and now Sarazin's hostage). Thes
e five are heading west up a steadily narrowing arm of the Willow Vale, hoping to find escape through a gate known to Elkin through scholarly research.

  Through pelting rain they stumbled, harried by the rough-fingered wind. The skies above, near black with the burden of cloud, birthed thunder. The thunder at first was distant. Then near at hand it spoke: THUMBLUMABLOM.

  Sarazin flinched, though he knew lightning comes first and thunder after. He heard the thunder so he was safe. For the moment. Then, close at hand – too close! – a tree shattered. Forked apart by lightning. He slipped, fell, thinking himself struck. A rock swung heavyweight into his head as thunder fisted the air apart. -Who? What? -Night? Or am I blind?

  That much he (gasping) asked, or thought he did. Heard incoherence reply, perhaps because the light was dazed, the sky still herding elephants, the river rain… '… all right?' -Of course I am.

  Yet there was a drunken discourse of stones beneath his feet, then and for some time after. The rains sluicing from grey to black. The strength of friends lugging, shoving, pushing and hauling, helping him onward, panting.

  Sick, bruised, stunned and stumbling, Sarazin mouthed surrender. But if anyone heard, they paid him no heed. Desperation ruled their will. He was driven onward like a slave being flogged to a place of execution. Several nightmares later, they halted. -To rest? No. To stare. Gawp. Gape.

  At a sheer-rising cliff topped by a bone-white pinnacle half a league high. Around that pinnacle coiled a dragon, its sheens and shines of jade and jacinth glittering as lightning writhed around it. Against such a monster, what sword could prevail? For the moment, it was looking north. But if it turned their way…

  Then Sarazin, with some sense left to him despite the blow to the head which had almost demolished his consciousness, realised the dragon was at least a hundred times too large to be alive. The brute was the work of hands. Statue? Sculpture? No word fitted.

  'I heard a man speak of this once,' said Heth. 'But he was drunk at the time. I thought the drink to be talking.'

 

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