by Lisa Shelby
I just moved a few weeks ago and am now a proud homeowner. That feels like the first step, and having the girls at my place will be the second. I hope I’m not kidding myself, but we’ll see what happens. Tonight, my mom is watching Ireland so that Emily could come out and meet all of my buddies from work. Many of them she already knows from growing up with a dad who worked for the department but there is a new generation of officers she doesn’t. Cops are a tight group. Like a family really. She needs to meet them all sooner than later and tonight is the night.
I can’t help but anxiously watch the front door. I’d be lying if I said it was just because I was waiting for Emily to get here. The truth is, I know that Alex will be with her and it’s been too long. There is just something about Alexandra Stotts. Always has been.
The first time I ever met her she was nothing but a gangly, little twelve-year-old. But there was still something about her that drew my arrogant fourteen-year-old self to her. Back then I was too cool to have liked one of my sister’s annoying little friends, but I always knew she was something special.
Now, my twenty-eight-year-old self, is standing here waiting for her to walk through the door so I can watch her from a distance. From a distance…just like I always have…well, except for that one night seven years ago.
2008
90’s night at Lola’s Room, one floor down from the Crystal Ballroom, is not my usual idea of a fun Saturday night. But the chick that Riley is dating wanted to come, so here we are. I’m a sucker for 90’s R&B and Hip Hop, so I couldn’t really argue when Riley pointed out there would be 90’s tunes, a bar, and a dance floor full of chicks. Works for me and here we are.
I’m standing off to the side, checking out the scene that I can instantly tell isn’t really my thing. The dance floor does provide some entertainment, and there are some decent looking women here, but nobody is really grabbing my attention. The crowd is a bit older than I’m used to. I’m only twenty-one and getting to go out is a great time no matter what at this point, but I think I’m going to head out as soon as I can get Riley’s attention.
Riley and She Whose Name I Can Never Remember, are currently slow dancing to an old Jodeci song and I just don’t have it in me to interrupt what they have going on. Riley really seems to be into this girl, and I know I should get to know her, but Riley and I never keep any chick around for too long, so I haven’t really made an effort. She doesn’t seem to be my biggest fan either, so…why bother?
The song finally ends and *NSYNC’s Bye, Bye, Bye starts and that is about all I can take. I have to get out of here. I spent the actual 90’s with *NSYNC blaring out of my sister’s room day in and day out. I need to find Riley and say bye, bye, bye to him pronto!
I put my not quite empty beer bottle on the bar and turn to make my way through the crowded dance floor to say goodbye to my best friend. The problem is I can’t move. My feet are frozen to the spot. This just can’t be. She’s only nineteen, how the hell did she get in here? Things here at Lola’s just got a lot more interesting. I tuck myself as far back from the crowd of dancing bodies as I can and settle in to enjoy the show.
This is what I have always done. Watched.
Alex is one of my sister’s best friends and therefore off limits. It doesn’t mean I haven’t lusted for her for years now. There is no denying she is, without a doubt, the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. She doesn’t look like every other girl in Portland and tonight, just like every time I see her, she stands out from the crowd. The fact that she’s just under six feet tall helps in that department but it’s also her exotic look. Her dad may be whiter than my Irish ass, but her mom’s family is from India. This combination has always made her look somewhat exotic with her light brown skin, long dark hair and dark brown eyes. She looks like she should be wearing a pair of bedazzled wings and be walking down the runway for a freaking Victoria’s Secret runway show.
Watching her out there on the dance floor, singing along to her favorite band, with that rare smile on her face is something to behold. She’s always been so quiet and shy when I’ve been around her. I would hear the girls in Emily’s room giggling hysterically or singing and dancing, but as soon as I would enter the room Alex would always clam up and seemed to be in a constant state of embarrassment. As the girls got older, and a little less giggly, she opened up a bit and would actually talk to me, but she always seemed shy. This is a new side to her that I’ve never seen. I like it.
I know I could ruin her evening and make her leave since she’s clearly not of age, but I’m enjoying the show too much right now. God, she looks good in her tight jeans and that crop top that shows just a sliver of skin. I feel like a perv standing in the background watching her, but this isn’t anything new. I have always watched Alexandra Stotts. She’s the one girl I have always wanted but never had, and I’m a guy who tends to get what I want.
When one of my favorites starts playing, and I see her swinging her hips in a slow motion that matches the beat of the classic Biggie Smalls tune, I find my feet are walking me out onto the dance floor and up behind the hottest ass in a pair of jeans I have ever seen.
I reach her, and just as I do her friend’s eyes widen. I put my finger to my lips and beg her not to say anything with a slow shake of my head. Her friend does me a solid and stops her reaction just in time. Before I know it I’m directly behind Alex, and my hands naturally go to her hips and I start to sway in time with the music. I feel her stiffen and try to turn around but my hands hold her in place. That’s a good sign. I’m glad she doesn’t just let random guys come up and touch her.
Putting my mouth next to her ear I take in the intoxicating smell of her hair before I say, “Alexandra Stotts, funny seeing you here. How old are you again?” I hear her gasp my name as she tries to turn around, but once again I stop her. “Dance with me, Alex, and your secret will be safe with me.”
She turns her head so she can look at me and the moment our eyes meet we’re both transfixed. Damn! There has always been something there, but being this close and having my hands on her has me feeling much more than I ever expected. She tries to say something in protest but I silence her when I say, “Just dance with me, Alex.”
With my order given, she starts to sway to the rhythm again. Within a matter of seconds her ass is gently rubbing on me in a way that I am more than certain gives her an idea of what she’s doing to me. To my surprise her arms come up, and she puts her hands behind my neck and exposes even more of her skin as her shirt lifts. My hands instinctively move to touch her. I leave one hand splayed across her lean stomach and the other I slowly slide up her side and then her arm. I use this move to turn her around so that she’s facing me. We don’t miss a beat and our eyes are locked on each other.
Fuck, she is more than I ever thought she would be. Who knew that the beautiful Alexandra Stotts could move like this? Who knew she could exude sex appeal like she is in this moment? It’s almost like she’s wanted me all these years, just as much as I’ve wanted her. I’m so lost in her eyes, her touch and in the moment, that I don’t even realize that there’s a new song playing. We haven’t changed our rhythm though. She straddles my leg; my arm is around her waist keeping her tight to my body and we continue to move together like we’ve done it a million times before.
It’s starting to get a little warm out here on the dance floor, and as if she’s reading my mind, she pulls her hair up in her hands and cools her neck. Shit, even her neck is sexy as fuck. She drops her hair once again and lets it all fall over one of her shoulders, leaving the other exposed. Not thinking, just acting on natural instinct, I lean down and kiss her neck and its quite possibly the softest skin my lips have ever touched. The moment I touch her, I feel her hands that were on my hips grip my shirt as she takes in a deep breath of air. Looks like she is just as affected as I am.
All too soon though she breaks the spell when she yells over the baseline that I feel pounding in my chest. “Mick, what are you doing?” I lift my head from
my new favorite spot and can’t help but grab her by the back of the neck and rub my thumb over the spot that my lips were just kissing. As soon as our eyes meet, I can see the worry shining back from hers.
“Sorry, Alex, but I have always wanted to do that. I just couldn’t help myself,” I reply honestly into her ear.
Sounding shocked and confused she asks. “What do you mean, Mick? You’ve always wanted to do what?”
Shit, why did I have to open my mouth? I don’t know if it’s because I’ve known her for so long, or if I feel close to her after that night at the hospital, but I don’t seem able to lie to her when I say, “I’ve always wanted to touch you, Alex. You’ve always been that forbidden fruit that I knew I wasn’t allowed to taste. I couldn’t resist you tonight.”
“You’ve always wanted to touch me?” She looks beyond confused and is looking at me like I have three heads. Okay, she may be sexy as shit but she is cute as hell too.
“Come on, let’s go talk.”
I don’t let her reply. I just take her by the hand and lead her off the dance floor. Like there is somebody up above looking out for me tonight, there is a tiny booth open to the left of the dance floor and I gently push her into the wooden seat and slide in right next to her. It’s a tiny booth and a tight fit but it’s too loud to talk from across the table. So, here I am pressed up next to her, still holding her hand.
“Mick, are you drunk?”
I can’t help the smile that spreads across my face. “Nope, I’ve only had one beer. I was just about to leave when I saw you on the dance floor.”
“You were?”
“I was.”
Her forehead is wrinkled in confusion and she’s biting her bottom lip. God, her lips are a thing of beauty. I can’t take my eyes off of them and before I know it my lips follow my line of sight and kiss her. I can feel her pull back at first but I lean toward her to follow her retreating mouth and finally, I fully capture her. Once our lips are locked on each other, she’s no longer resisting me as she wraps her arms around my neck and both hands grab the back of my head. I would give anything to take her right here on this table, but unfortunately I think the establishment might frown upon that.
“Let’s get out of here, Alex. Please?”
A simple nod of her head is answer enough for me. I grab her by the hand, and she pulls me toward her friend who is leaning against one of the big posts that run through the middle of the room. It appears she’s been watching our PDA, and she seems quite entertained. As Alex approaches her, to let her know she’s leaving, her friend is shooing her away before she can get a word out. Now that right there, is what I call a wingman. I like this friend. I spot Riley at the bar just as he spots me. I give him a flick of the head that signals that I’m leaving and I see the moment he realizes who I’m leaving with. His eyes widen and I can see the shock on his face, but I don’t want to think about what he or anybody else have to say.
Still holding her hand, I lead us in the direction of the exit and in a blur we’re downstairs, and standing out on the corner of Burnside waiting to cross the street to get to my truck. I should have known it was going to be a good night when I scored this rock star parking. I guess Riley will have to call a taxi. He’s a big boy, he’ll figure it out.
She hasn’t said a word. When we get to my truck, I go to open the door for her and can’t help but push her up against it to take another taste of that sweet mouth of hers before helping her inside. I walk around the back of the truck and take a moment to adjust myself before I climb in and join her in the cab.
Those few moments alone in the truck seem to have given her time to think. When I look over at her she’s wringing her hands and her knee is bouncing with nerves.
“Mick, I don’t know what’s going on but we can’t do this. Your sister is my best friend and she would never forgive me.”
“Emily doesn’t have to know, Alex. She’s all the way down in California and I know I’m not gonna call and tell her.”
She doesn’t reply. She just shakes her head and reaches for the door. I lean over and grab her hand and now I’m practically in her lap as I hold my weight with my hand that’s on the door. I’m so close that I can’t waste the moment and I take her mouth in a fierce kiss. She kisses me back, but not quite as fiercely. Something feels different now that we aren’t in the dark bar.
“What is it, Alex? This can’t just be because of my sister.”
Quietly…almost on a whisper I hear her say, “But you’re Mickey Jacobs. I don’t want to be one of the many girls that sleeps with Mickey Jacobs. I’m not like that, Mick.”
And there it is. She basically just called me out and tagged me a man-whore. I can’t say that she’s wrong. I don’t do repeats, for the most part, and I don’t do relationships. I still manage to have plenty of sex though. Whenever and wherever, sex is something that seems to always be at my disposal.
With a serious look on my face but humor in my voice I ask, “You calling me a slut, Alex?”
“No. Well, I mean maybe. I’m just not like that, Mick, and it’s not worth ruining my friendship with Emily just so all my childhood fantasies can be full-filled.”
And just like that I am harder than I have ever been. Her confession feeds my ego, but also fortifies my plans for the rest of the night.
I tuck her hair behind her ear and then get in nice and close when I say into the same ear, “Did I just hear you say that I was your childhood fantasy, Alex?”
“Shit.”
“Don’t worry, sweet thing, the feeling is mutual,” I say as I kiss her soft neck.
“What in the world is going on, Mick? What do you mean the feeling is mutual? Since when?”
“Oh Alex, you have no idea,” I whisper into her ear as my free hand slowly glides up her side and to her perfect breast. “There has been something about you since the first time I saw you. Watching you grow into the beautiful woman you are here tonight has been something to witness. If you didn’t practically live at my house all summer long and if you weren’t my sister’s friend, I would have been all over you years ago. Don’t you see? Tonight, is our chance. Sounds like we both want to see how good this could be.” I’m back to what just may be my favorite spot on earth…Alexandra Stotts’ neck.
I gently kiss and nibble on the side of her neck when she says, “Emily can never know, Mick.”
“I can keep a secret, Alex. Trust me?”
“Hey Pretty Boy!” I hear Emily yell from a few feet behind me. I turn from Jonathan and Devon just as Emily jumps into my arms and gives me a big hug. I see Cami behind her but no Alex.
“I thought Alex was coming with you guys. She scared to hang with me and the boys tonight?” I say trying to mask my disappointment.
“She’s here, but Kevin already grabbed her.”
And just like that all the excitement I had to see her vanishes. I forgot about the boyfriend. Watching her from afar with some douche attached to her isn’t as much fun as my usual stalking.
I leave my arm around Emily’s shoulder and introduce her to a couple people. Just as I introduce her to my co-worker, Jonathan Kelly and his friend Devon McCoy, I hear Emmett call my name. By the look on his face it’s important.
“Sorry, Emmers, be right back.”
I make my way towards Emmett and on my way across the bar I finally see her. Just as I suspected, she’s standing with some douche in a suit—and if I am seeing things correctly he has on cufflinks. Who the fuck wears cufflinks to Kells? He looks like about as much fun as a heart attack. I mean, I guess he’s a good-looking guy. He’s close to my height, which means he’s got to be around 6’3”. He’s got dark hair and looks fit, but he doesn’t look strong. Maybe I’m just telling myself that because I don’t want Alex to be attracted to this tool. Right now, she’s just standing there staring at the ground while he talks to a bunch of other suits and completely ignores her.
I finally reach Emmett, without taking my eyes off of her, and he tells me that the a
pparent emergency is that he just heard from some girls we met last week at Brew Fest and that they were on their way. Seeing Alex across the bar makes my excitement at the prospects that are on their way a little less than it normally would be. I really need to shake this off, but it’s a little hard to get excited over some random chick when the best night of my life is standing in the same room.
I know I need to keep my distance, but seeing the way Alex is standing there being ignored is unacceptable. Any man that could have her by his side and disregard her like he is right now well…that is no man at all. As I get closer she raises her head and her eyes instantly latch on to mine. One side of her mouth turns up in a little half smile, but it disappears just as quickly as it had appeared.
I approach the group of four men and Alex, and I can see her ever so slightly shake her head as if she’s telling me not to approach. Well, because I’m me, that just makes me want to go and say my hellos that much more.
I can see Kevin notice me as I walk up to Alex and pull her into my side and give her a little peck to the temple, just like I would to Emily or Cami. Nobody knows about our night and therefore it isn’t out of place to say hello this way. If only they knew that every time I touch her I feel like I’m on fucking fire.
“How’s it going, Alex?” I can feel her stiffen under my arm. She’s almost shaking.
“Good, Mick,” she says as she tries to scoot away from me.
Taking my arm off of her, I reach in front of her and offer my hand to Kevin. “Hey, what’s up, man. Mick Jacobs.”
He begrudgingly, takes my hand and says, “Kevin Lannister…and how do you know Alexandra?”
He let’s go of my hand, and grabs her by the arm to pull her closer to him. I can tell it hurts, but she goes along with him.
“I’ve known Alex since she was a twelve-year-old singing along to *NSYNC in my sister’s bedroom.” I make an obvious look at his hand on her arm and when he notices he decides to loosen his grip but doesn’t let go. “She’s like family to me. How did you two meet?” I ask staring down at him and looking him dead in the eye.
