CHAPTER XLIII
THE CYNIC'S SHADOW
The doubt and distrust of all humanity, first implanted in Winn Hardy'smind by his friend and adviser, Nickerson, was now working itsinevitable injury. Much of it had been brushed away during Winn'sassociation with the simple and honest people of Rockhaven andespecially Jess; but now that he was back again in the city and in touchwith its pushing, selfish life, once more cynicism ruled him. Hisvocation as reporter paid poorly; he was in daily contact withunscrupulous and suspicious men, saw poverty begging in alleyways andarrogant wealth riding in carriages, men obsequiously bowing before therich and snubbing the poor, and on all sides and in all ways he was madeto realize that money was the god the city worshipped, and show, itsreligion.
On Sunday, when the usual morning chimes answered each other, histhoughts flew to Rockhaven and the two bells there; but when with hisaunt, in church, he listened to the operatic singing and classicsermon, it all seemed to lack heart and sincerity, and not one solitarynote of supplication entered the minister's prayer. Then the elegantlydressed ladies who greeted one another as at a reception, the men wholooked bored and at the close of the service seemed relieved, each andall seemed to Winn to be there on exhibition.
Then, too, his moral safeguards were in daily danger, and the sneeringNickerson, their assailant.
"Well, old boy," he said to Winn one evening at the club, "how do youlike penny-a-lining these cold winter days? Is an editorship any nearerin sight?"
"Nothing in sight for me except one demnition grind," replied Winn,disconsolately; "I get discouraged sometimes and think I am no good onearth."
Nickerson looked at him with a sarcastic smile.
"Winn, my dear fellow," he said at last, "I'm going to be very candidwith you, so don't be angry with me. To begin with you are too honestand too good-hearted. You think of others first and yourself last, andthen you have scruples. Now scruples don't go here in the city, andwhoever cultivates them gets left. In the first place, Weston & Hillplayed you for a dupe, and if I hadn't come to the rescue, you'd havebeen stranded on the island and out five hundred, and the natives wouldhave been ready to ride you on a rail. Then when we saved your bacon andyou knew they were two thieves, you even returned them the little extramoney they had sent you to pay the men. I won't say anything about theheroic way you made your aunt's loss good. It was heroic, but it wasn'tsense.
"Now, after all this eye-opening experience, and you on your uppers, soto speak, I offered to start you in a lawful business, you won't haveit, simply because it smacks of gambling! Winn, you are one of the bestfellows in the world, and I like you, but you are a fool--net!"
"Well, I'll keep on being one," answered Winn warmly (for no man enjoysplain truth), "before I'll open a bucket shop and knowingly rob people."
"Yes, and walk while the rest ride," asserted Jack, tersely, "you knowthe old deacon's advice to his son just starting out in life,--'Makemoney, my son, honestly if you can, but make it!'"
"All very good," replied Winn, "but old. I doubt whether you can changemy fool ideas, if you talk till doomsday; but you may mellow them. Andthat reminds me of another fool thing I've done. I bought the soleright, title, and deed of the Rockhaven Granite Company's quarry a fewweeks ago."
"The wisest buy you ever made, my boy," answered Jack, quickly; "and nowif you will hustle around and get some men to put money into a newcompany, you will be in luck once more." Then, as another idea came tothis quick-witted man of the world, he added, "What's the matter withJess Hutton and all the money we made for him?"
But Winn was silent, while a tide of memory swept over his feelings. Andin it was Mona, with her tender love, and Jess, with the heart and handhe offered at parting, and all the good people on the island whom Winnknew to be his friends. And as all the possibilities Rockhaven containedcame back to him, now it suddenly dawned upon him that Jack Nickersonhad named him rightly.
"I see I've put you to sleep," continued Jack, after the long pausewhile he watched Winn, "and now I'll wake you up. I saw Ethel Sherman ina box at the theatre last night, with our mutual friend, Simmons. Hemust have reached his second childhood!"
Then Winn did wake up.
And more than that, a few unconsidered trifles connected with this samevivacious Ethel assumed index shape. He recalled that she had for thepast six weeks specified the evenings she would be at home to him, fora week ahead. He also recalled that a plenitude of choicest flowers hadalways graced her parlor lately.
"And why not," he answered coolly, "old Simmons is a widower worth amillion, has just built an elegant new residence of the granite wequarried, and Ethel's in the market. I think she shows good sense--atleast your kind of good sense, Jack."
"Yes, and of all experienced people," asserted Nickerson, defiantly."Sentiment is a fine thing in books or on the stage, it may influencesilly girls or callow boys, but it's out of date in this age."
And Winn, recalling his own early episode with Ethel, and the lesson inlife that for weeks had been forced upon him, was more than halfinclined to believe his friend to be right.
And yet, as he thought of this prospective January and May affair, and afossil like Simmons, with dyed hair, false teeth, and certainly sixtyyears wrinkling his face, he felt disgusted with Ethel. And the more hethought of the groove he was in, of the cold, selfish, grasping citylife where mammon was king and sentiment a jest, the more his heartturned to Rockhaven. Then the thought of Mona came back to him, and ayearning for her, impossible to resist. And with it, self-reproach thathe had let his own discouragement control his actions so long. A fewdays more did he waver, and then his heart's impulse won.
The winter had nearly passed and the days were lengthening when thisimpulse came, but he waited no longer.
"I'm going to Rockhaven," he said to his aunt that night, "and shall begone a few days. I've obtained a week's leave of absence from the paper,and start to-morrow. I want to see Jess Hutton and some of my oldfriends there. I've also an idea that possibly the quarry can be startedagain. If I can bring it about," he added, after a pause, "how would youfeel about loaning me a few thousand dollars, auntie?"
Then the motherly side of Mrs. Converse spoke out.
"I'll do it gladly, Winn," she responded. "I've felt all along that themoney you saved me was more yours than mine, and you shall have all ofit that you need."
And when Winn left the city, as once before, a new courage and new hopestinged his horizon.
And first and foremost in them was the flowerlike face and soulful eyesof Mona.
The wisest of us, however, are but mere bats in this world, blindlyflying hither and thither. At times one may, by sheer good luck, flyfree; and then again we strike our heads against a wall.
Yet we think we are very wise.
And so, Winn Hardy, full of hope and love, found, when he reached thecoast town where the steamer _Rockhaven_ made landing, that her tripswere but twice a week now and he had a full day to wait.
How slowly it passed while he chafed at the delay! how his eagerness tobe with Mona grew! how his longing increased as he counted the hours hemust wait! and with all mingled a self-reproach, need not be specified.For it had dawned upon Winn that his conclusions regarding Mona mighthave been wrong, and once we feel that we have made a mistake, we soonfeel sure that it must be so.
And Winn was now certain.
But he would and could repair it easily. All that was necessary was toassure Mona that he had been discouraged or he would have written again,and to reproach her gently for neglecting to answer his letter.
How easily we plan excuses for our own conduct, and how like a child'stoy we are apt to consider a woman's heart!
When, after a day's wait that seemed a week to Winn, the _Rockhaven_made landing, he leaped aboard to grasp Captain Roby's hand almost ashe would a father's. But a half gale was blowing outside, the captainnervously anxious to unload, and start back; and only a word of greetingdid Winn receive until the steamer was well under way t
oward Rockhaven.Then, feeling privileged, he entered the little pilot house.
"Well, Captain Roby," he said, "how are you and how's the island?"
"Oh, it's thar yit," answered that bronze-faced skipper, shifting thewheel a point and heading seaward, "an' likely to stay thar. It seemssorter nat'rel to see ye, Mr. Hardy," he added cheerfully, "an' I'mright glad to git the chance. We've been wonderin' what become o' ye an'how the quarryin' business was comin' out. Ye ain't thinkin' o' startin'it up agin, air ye?"
"Possibly," answered Winn, "in fact, that is a part of my errand here,and to make you all a visit. The old company failed, as, I presume, youknow, and I've bought the quarry myself now."
"I'm mighty glad on't," replied the captain cordially, "an' so'll all onus be. We've sorter took to ye, Mr. Hardy."
"And how is my old friend, Jess?" asked Winn, unable to withhold thatquery longer, "and Mrs. Hutton and her daughter and Mrs. Moore?"
"Wal, Jess an' the Widder Hutton took a notion to git hitched long 'foreChristmas," answered the captain slowly, "an' they're gone to the city'n' taken Mona with 'em. We gin 'em a great send-off, and I run ashorejist a purpose for 'em. It's curus ye haint seen Jess up thar. I'da-s'posed ye would."
Winn's heart sank.
"When do you go back, captain?" he said finally, trying to hide hisbitter disappointment. "I supposed you made daily trips as usual."
"Only Tuesdays and Fridays," he answered; "thar ain't much need o'runnin' oftener."
And this was Friday!
And Winn, the now ardent Romeo, had three full days and four nights tospend on Rockhaven, and Juliet was not there!
There are many of the fair sex who will say that it served him right.
And what a picture of cheerless desolation was this sea-girt island whenWinn neared it! A half gale was blowing, the waves leaping high againstthe snow-topped cliffs, and as the _Rockhaven_, rolling, pitching, andhalf coated with frozen spray, turned into the little harbor and nearedher dock, only one man, shivering in oil skins, was there to meet her.
"I wish ye'd put up with me," said Captain Roby to Winn, when thesteamer's plank was shoved out. "We'd be more'n glad to hev ye, an'llmake ye welcome."
And Winn, dreading the empty white cottage next to Mrs. Moore's fully asmuch as that excellent woman's curiosity, accepted the captain's offer.That evening, in spite of Winn's disappointment, was a pleasant one tohim, for the news of his arrival had flown like the wind, and a constantstream of callers came to the captain's house. It seemed as if allRockhaven was desirous of extending a welcome hand, and from Parson Bushdown to men whose names Winn had never known, they kept coming. Neverbefore had he been so lionized or made to feel that he had so manyfriends, and so cordially did they one and all greet him that, had theRev. Bush suggested that they all join in a hymn of thankfulness, Winnwould not have been more surprised. It recalled the parting words ofJess, and in a forcible way.
But alas! that genial philosopher was absent!
Winn, however, saw his opening, and with a little natural pride, statedthat he now owned the quarry, and, if some capital could be furnishedby these island people, he was in a position to put in a matter of fiveor ten thousand dollars, and the industry would be started anew. Then asa climax to this proposition, he read to them the history of theRockhaven Granite Company and gave a description of the auction of itsassets.
But he did not mention the price he had paid for the quarry.
It was midnight ere the crowd dispersed and Winn, proud and happy, wasshown to his room. But the next day a reaction came; for when he calledupon Mrs. Moore, as he felt he must, the closed white cottage next doorand the little dooryard, now under snow, where Mona had reared herflowers, seemed like a tomb. His worthy landlady was overjoyed to seehim, however, and gave an explicit account of the wedding that hadoccurred, of Mrs. Hutton's dress, how pretty Mona looked and how happyall were. She, too, supposed Winn must have heard of it, and marvelledgreatly that the Hutton family could have been in the city now threemonths, and Winn not meet them. Where they were stopping, what doing,and when they were to return, she knew not. So Winn left her, as much inthe dark as ever.
And then, though the snow lay thick on the ledges swept by the ocean'swinds, like a love-lorn swain he must visit Norse Hill and go over tothe gorge to peer into its interior, and the cave, then back to the oldtide mill and to the village. When Sunday came he was really glad toattend church, and by evening was so disconsolate that he wished forwings to fly to the mainland. In spite of cordiality, Rockhaven was nowa desolate spot.
And when Tuesday came and he sailed away, the sole passenger over themisty ocean with Captain Roby, Winn was a wiser and sadder man. When hereached the city he felt that if he could but find Mona, to kneel at herfeet and beg for her love would be a blessed privilege.
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