by Lynn Wolfe
He ignored her attitude. “I was wondering if Mary might be working. It’s imperative I speak with her immediately.” If Minnie wanted to act snobbish he wasn’t about to play nice. Thomas knew he stated his question curtly but he was very eager to get his visit with Mary over.
“It’s nice to see you, too, Thomas.” Minnie replied with acid in her voice. “Where now did you think she’d be? Mary returned to the shop this morning devastated beyond words for what has been done to her. And her poor heart is broken! What happened in America to make James fall out of love with our beautiful Mary and find someone to replace her and so quickly at that? Or was there always someone else, Thomas? How could James have fooled Mary and me both for almost two years with his claim to love her?”
Thomas tried to pay little attention to the fact that Miss Minnie had been crying. He was surprised at how upset she appeared. This wasn’t his fault. He didn’t want to listen to her scolding about poor Mary.
“Sorry, Miss Minnie, it truly is good to see you but not under these circumstances. I’ve urgent need to speak to Mary. Is she here or not? Once I have spoken with her, I’ll share with you what I know about James and everything that happened. Trust me when I say this should only take a second–-and then I shall gladly leave her to her misery.”
Minnie noticed that even though Thomas heard her words, he hadn’t paused long enough to take them in. She knew all Thomas wanted was to speak with Mary. Minnie had heard enough.
“What an evil thing to say! How dare you! Mary didn’t deserve this! In fact, no one deserved the treatment she was subjected to on this day! She’s the sweetest and kindest person I know. There was a time when you thought so, too! I can’t help but think America has not only destroyed James and Mary’s chance at a life together, but it appears she has lost a brother as well! So be it! Your mother would be greatly disappointed in you, Thomas Ball! Thank goodness she isn’t alive to witness such behavior!”
Thomas glared at Minnie. Who did she think she was to talk to him in such a way? Did she truly think James would never find out what Mary had done? Did she think for one minute Mary’s betrayal would have remained hidden. Did she really think she could marry James after she was used by someone else? He needed to face Mary now!
“Is she in the back room? Tell me, Damn you!” But Thomas didn’t wait for an answer. He headed for the back room and barely heard Minnie calling after him to stop. He turned his head just in time to hear Minnie’s last few words.
“Aye, she is. But please be gentle. She’s been through enough today to last a lifetime.”
Thomas clenched his jaw and ignored Minnie’s pleas. Mary was about to learn what pain was all about. He was pleased to see Mary weeping on the settee. Very pleased. He slammed the door closed.
He stood silently for a moment and watched as his sister looked up and he saw it slowly registered to her who had entered. He was pleased to see her in agony. Now, she would hear the words he had prepared and there would be no escaping her punishment.
“Well, what happened to you? Did the gentleman you married boot your ass to home once he discovered you were after his money? You didn’t really think you could fit in with England’s finest now did you?
“I feel no pity for you, Mary. You nearly destroyed James by what you did. But thank heavens he met a woman who loves him. I must say how extremely disappointed I am with your actions. Have no worries, though, for once The Emerald sets sail in a few days, you’ll never see us again! And might I add, we’ll be better off because of it!”
Mary stared at Thomas in disbelief. He just hurt her to the core when she thought nothing else could make things worse. How could he say such horrible things after what James had already done to her just a short time ago?
Who was this person yelling at her and telling her what an awful person she had become? How dare he infer she had caused this pain! What had he said? Mary was trying to make sense of what she’d heard. Did he actually make a reference to her running off with some type of English Nobleman and getting married?
After some time Mary had the ability to speak, once she had managed to contain her anger. She noticed Thomas standing before her with an awful smirk. She couldn’t help but feel mortified at how Thomas, the brother she loved so dearly, had just treated her.
“Thomas, I don’t believe I understand any of what you’re saying. Did you insinuate I ran off with someone else? That couldn’t be what you said! Did I not promise to be at the dock once I got word the ship arrived? Did I not swear my love to James over and over? I kept my promise! I never thought for one minute James wouldn’t keep his word! Never! What a fool I’ve been!”
Thomas sneered, “Please, Mary, don’t insult me with your lies. I would have spotted you at the docks if you’d actually been there. Besides, had you come, you would have found out James has taken a wife. In fact, they’re very much in love and are expecting a child in a few months. So what have you to say now? Did you think you could really con me into believing you went to the docks this morning? You’re the little fool, Mary. You would have certainly come forward to take James to task if you’d actually been there!”
Mary was horrified and crushed. The tears were flowing and she found she couldn’t wipe them away fast enough. She was filled with more anger than she had ever had in her entire life. She kept sucking in air trying to catch her breath.
“How dare you call me a liar, Thomas Ball? I was there! I was at the ship! I saw you, James and those women! I saw everything!
“When I first saw you, Thomas, I was foolishly thrilled. I just knew you had changed your mind and decided to surprise me. I called out several times to you and James, but no one heard! Yet, I was so happy you’d both arrived in London, especially you, and that you were coming to my wedding.
“But what a fool I’d been. I’ve done nothing for this past year but dream of my wedding and make my gown. It’s the most beautiful dress, too! I spent almost every Sunday for the past year in this shop making sure every bead was in place, dreaming of my life in America and thinking how wonderful it was going to be having you living close. I’m still remembering the promise we made, Thomas, the three of us together, forever.
“For the past two weeks I’ve gotten up early and prayed this would be the day James returned. I envisioned him greeting me at the docks and then receiving the emerald ring he promised. But what did I get? A cruel dose of the truth! I now know what a fool I was. Did you laugh at your silly, naïve sister who thought she had met the man of her dreams? How many nights did you make fun of me, Thomas? Tell Me! Was it worth it? Get out! I’m glad you’re returning to America. I’ll hate that bastard, James Parker, until the day I die! And you, why, you are just as bad!”
As soon as the words left her mouth about Thomas, Mary wished she had not said them. But the words she spoke about James had been true. She hated acting mean. She sobbed openly. Let Thomas go back and tell James how distraught she was. She knew he wouldn’t care. Why should he? Right now all she wanted was for Thomas to leave her alone to her misery.”
“Mary, did you really think father would keep your secret? I’m sure he took great pleasure when he wrote to James immediately after you eloped. Do you not know what delight he had in telling James you’d run off with another? Are you so stupid to think you could get away with such an evil deed and now pretend nothing ever happened? I was at the cottage, Mary, I know you’re living back home. Your marriage couldn’t have lasted too long for you to finish a wedding dress.
“James is not a fool, Mary, and neither am I! He would have found out you weren’t a virgin! Then what were you going to do? He would never have forgiven you. You deserve no sympathy!”
“Evil deed? You think I did an evil deed? How dare you insinuate I’m not a virgin! You’re trying to tell me this is over some letter father supposedly wrote. What English Nobleman could ever compare to James? How exactly, would I’ve had the opportunity to meet someone with a title? If I did, why would he consider a seamstress a
fit wife? You’re an idiot! You’re speaking nonsense!”
But Mary had a sinking feeling her father indeed sent such a letter to James. That was the only thing which made sense. James had foolishly believed whatever lies were in that letter. Why would James have doubted her knowing how much her father was opposed to their wedding? But the fact was, he had, and Thomas believed those lies, too. What fools! What stupid fools!
To her horror, Mary now realized what had happened, how it happened and why it happened. But knowing the truth didn’t ease her pain or mend her broken heart. She could never love another, not after falling in love with someone as wonderful as James. And those two twits believed her father instead of trusting her. The one person, who Thomas should have known, would never intentionally hurt anyone, not now, not ever.
To make things worse and add to her bitter disappointment, she realized it hadn’t taken James long to find another to take her place. He couldn’t have had the deep love for her she had held for him. How could he have doubted her? Was she the only person who had the ability to stand on honor?
Chapter Eleven
As Thomas watched Mary mulling over the situation, he was trying to come to terms with what she’d told him. He didn’t want to believe she had stated the truth. But what if she had? Mary would now be left to suffer, and suffer greatly for the remainder of her life, alone.
Thomas knew his father had been angry for him leaving England, but could he really do such a horrific deed to Mary? Thomas forced himself to take a close look at her. He saw the pain etched on her face, her trembling body, and her defeated spirit. She was barely holding herself together. He had never seen her distraught like this.
He now knew what Mary had told him was true. My God, what had he and James done?
“Mary, I’m not sure what to say. I beg you to forgive us. I see the truth now for what it is. You have to understand, we never thought to doubt father’s letter. I knew he could be cantankerous, but to lie about such a thing, even for him, is hard to believe.” Thomas said as he started to reach out to Mary but her glare told him to stand back.
After a minute or two had passed Mary knew she had to end this conversation. She was too exhausted both physically and mentally to go on. “Well, you’re going to have to accept it for what it is, Thomas. But let me tell you something. I’ve thought about James for the last year and few days. I cannot fathom how you or James could have been so ready to believe I could have loved another! You both doubted me when I have never given either of you a reason to.
“You’ve known me far better than anyone, Thomas. You’ve hurt me deeply! Not to mention the hurt James has done! Knowing he replaced me, without giving me a chance to explain, and that he could stop loving me so quickly hurts the worst. I can’t accept the fact he ever loved me as I loved him. I had foolishly believed his every word. And the emerald rings he promised me are probably on the hand of his new wife, are they not?”
Thomas looked down at the floor. He couldn’t bring himself to look at Mary’s face. “Aye, Mary. But he’d loved you deeply, Mary, at one time. I need to tell you how he’d gotten very drunk the day he received the letter from father and stayed that way until I came upon him several days later. The letter nearly destroyed him, Mary.
“We both believed what father wrote, for which I’m so sorry. We’ve wronged you in the worst possible way. Please forgive me. I beg you. When James finds out what’s taken place, he’ll be livid with father and himself. He’ll feel terrible, Mary. You know he will.”
Mary shook her head in anger. “Do you think for one minute I care what that bastard thinks or feels? Well, I don’t, Thomas! But you must promise me James will not find out the truth. I never want him to know I came to the ship this day. What good could come of him knowing the truth now? He would only pity me for the remainder of his life, Thomas, and I couldn’t bear it! Not from James––nor from you.
“There’s nothing more that can be done other than me dealing with father when he eventually returns home. I’ll learn to live with this pain in my heart. I can’t believe our own father could hurt me so badly. He’s betrayed me, you’ve betrayed me and most of all James has betrayed me. What have I left, Thomas? Only Minnie has stood by my side and has total trust and faith in me.
“Please leave, I’m very angry and hurt. There’s nothing you can say or do to change my feelings toward all three of you stupid, stupid, men. I don’t know how to answer you about forgiveness. I don’t have it in me right now to do so. Maybe in time I’ll feel differently.
“I’m angry, bitter, and ashamed of myself for ever being so naïve as to believe I could have found such happiness only to have my dream stolen by those who had no faith in my promises. No faith in me. When I give my word, Thomas, I don’t break it, unlike you or James. Go now. Get Out!”
“Mary, I want to make things right.”
“Make things right? Thomas, go! Haven’t you already done enough? If you truly wanted to have made things right, you should have written to me and asked if there was any truth to the letter written to James! You and James could have waited till the year was up to find the truth for yourselves! If only you had some faith in me.”
Thinking on what she’d said and now knowing in her heart the truth about everything, Mary reluctantly continued in a somewhat kinder voice, “Yet, I realize all those letters I wrote to James and you were never received, were they? Father had seen to that. And he would have never given me any letters from you or James even if one had been written. None of that matters now.
“If there’d been letters between us, this conversation would not be taking place. Father got exactly what he wanted and he is the only one who did. Although, I think you and James seem quite happy and content with your lives, wouldn’t you agree?” But Mary continued before Thomas had a chance to say anything further.
“But I swear father’s pompous attitude will be changing once I see him. I shall inform him in no uncertain terms how I, too, plan to move to America, once I save enough money. I must get far away from him, for I shall never forgive him for what’s been done. If America is as big a country as you claim, I can live there without the worry of ever running into you or James again. Maybe someday, Thomas, a very long time from now, we might make amends. I don’t know. Right now, I need to be alone. I’m not in the mood to feel forgiving towards anyone today.
“So this is goodbye, Thomas. Promise me you’ll never tell James what happened. Not now, or ever. I think one destroyed life is enough. I don’t want James to pity me. I would much rather he hated me for what he thought I did, than to feel sorry for me for what I’m now left to endure. You owe me this, Thomas. You owe me!
“I know James well enough to know he’d try to make up for the situation. But there is nothing he could say or do to help me. Now leave, Thomas, and I pray you have a very happy life, one I shall envy, one filled with someone to love and share your life with.”
Chapter Twelve
London
As Thomas turned to leave he saw Minnie in the doorway. She said nothing as he passed but she didn’t need to. The sadness on her face combined with her tears assured him he acted like an ass. He knew she loved Mary as much as he did. He was relieved she remained silent. Although, he might have felt better had she given him the tongue lashing he deserved. Anything she might call him would have been no worse than what he had been calling himself.
The only solace Thomas had was to know Mary had Minnie to help her through this. But what good would that do? Mary would still be left alone. Thomas knew Minnie would forgive him far sooner than Mary. Who could blame Mary for hating him and James? Certainly not him.
Thomas could not remember a time when he felt so low. How could he have doubted Mary? Yet, he knew how, because he foolishly believed his father. Why would any parent do that to their child?
Thomas started to panic knowing he would have to push down his feelings deep within him once he returned to the hotel. He needed to appear happy tonight when he met J
ames, Susannah and Anna for dinner. He wasn’t certain how well he could pretend everything was fine. Anna knew him too well. So did James.
Could he really pull this off? Making the others think he was happy while he knew they thought the worst of Mary? He understood what Mary was asking. He would never want anyone to pity him, for any reason. He was in an awful position. Yet, Mary had been hurt enough. He thought maybe she was right, maybe he should allow everyone to believe the worst, at least for now. What a dilemma to be in, damned if he told the truth and damned if he didn’t.
Would Mary ever be the fun-loving, kind and sweet spirited person she’d been before any of this took place? He feared and knew in his heart that this would change Mary. He hoped she could rise above the pain and hurt. Mary would now think twice before trusting any man–-especially now, when she knew she’d never have her fairy tale ending.
Poor, poor, Mary, Thomas thought. There was nothing he could do to help her get through her suffering. As much as he hated his father for the letter he sent to James, he hated himself for ever doubting Mary. He should have known Mary wouldn’t have gone back on her word. She had never been a shallow person. Why, had he ever doubted her? Why had he been so ready to believe the worst?
Because he had been blinded by his loyalty to James. By seeing his closest friend nearly destroyed he hadn’t stopped to think that he and James should have gotten proof of what his father had written. Now, the letter has changed the lives of so many.
Fools! He and James were indeed fools! Thomas only hoped his father would return home in time for him to teach him a lesson about honesty and integrity. A lesson long overdue! Yet, knowing his father as he did, he knew this coward of a man would find a way to keep out of sight until after their ship set sail to America.
