by Cole Lepley
“Um, Perry?” Jeremy says, interrupting my thoughts. “You coming or what?”
Biting down my frustration, I throw my bag in the back and climb inside. Surprisingly, Tess sits next to me. And by next to me, I mean very close. With all the baggage we are taking, there are barely two seats back here.
When Walker starts the ignition, she looks over at me with a small smile. “I’m glad you came.”
I pat the top of her leg. “Me, too.”
It was a friendly gesture, but the look in her eyes and the warmth running up my arm from where I touched her tells me otherwise.
Bishop.
Her name is Bishop, and she’s a dude.
The lake house, if you can even call it that, is only a thirty-minute drive. It’s basically a small cabin with barely any running water and shoddy electricity. But to us, it’s the greatest thing we’ve ever seen. Lake Wintergreen is perhaps the most scenic lake in all of New Haven. That may just be my personal opinion, but coming here every summer is something I look forward to the most.
The houses along the lake go for upwards of a million dollars and to have a small cabin like Walker’s family, you still need to spend a pretty penny. It does come with a dock, boat launch (complete with ski doo’s) and a sweet golf cart. No matter how hard we try, something always happens to the poor thing. I hope this year will be different. We like having it around.
I’m sitting on a wooden rocking chair trying like hell to piece back together my shattered phone. I let off a string of profanities every five seconds until a small phone is handed to me. I turn to see Tess in the chair beside me, an amused expression on her face.
“Here, use mine.”
I can’t help but smile a little. “Thanks, Bishop. But calling Sloan from another girl’s phone, no matter who they are, will just cause more problems.”
Tess slumps back in her seat and shoves her phone in her pocket. With a sigh she says, “Well, don’t let her ruin your trip.”
Turning to her, I tilt my head. “Don’t ever change, Bishop. Don’t let some guy make you feel like you’re not good enough or mess with some guy’s head just because you can. Just keep being you, okay?”
“Okay,” she says hesitantly. “Are you okay, Perry?”
I stand up from my chair and stretch my arms above my head. “Yeah, I’m cool. I need to take a walk.”
I step into the cabin to get my shoes and the door for the bedroom I’m sharing with Jeremy is closed. I knock twice.
“Who is it?” he shouts through the door.
I laugh. “It’s me. What are you doing? Jerking off in there?”
He opens the door and looks around before landing his eyes on me. He’s acting very nervous which isn’t like him at all.
“You alone?”
I push on his chest to move him back, but he stops me. “Yes, I’m alone. Why are you acting so weird?”
A wicked smile crosses his lips. “I have a plan.”
I arch an eyebrow. “What kind of plan?”
He steps aside and I immediately see what he’s talking about.
“Jer, this seems like trouble.”
He pats me on the back, pride in his eyes. “Yep. A whole lot of it.”
4
Kryptonite
Perry- Now
I left work early today. Not like it isn’t something I haven’t done before, but I can’t concentrate. Leaving things like that with Tess the other day has been eating at me like crazy. I’m not the type of guy to run from my problems, but this one is different. I know you’re not supposed to blame yourself for the stupid shit you get into when you are teenagers, but for us, it carried into adulthood.
I’m sulking away on my chair when there’s a knock on my door. With a sigh, I push myself up and prepare for the worst. Visitors haven’t exactly been friendly lately. When I see my mom’s warm smile, I smile back. Thank God.
I pull the door open and she hugs me. Now, for most families this may seem normal, but then again—not all families have an estranged felon living in the apartment above the garage.
I hug her back. “You miss me or something,” I joke into her ear.
She pulls back and slaps me lightly in the chest. “Can’t a mother check on her son from time to time?” She steps in and begins picking up clothes spread around the room. “Even if he is grown.” She turns back to me. “You do know how to do laundry right?”
I laugh. “Yeah, I’m a little behind, I guess.”
She grabs a laundry basket from the corner and continues around the small apartment until it’s filled to the hilt.
“Mom, did you have something you needed to tell me or are you just here to do my laundry?”
I itch to grab the cigarette perched on top of my ear, but I don’t. I don’t need that lecture along with whichever one is coming.
She sets the basket down by the front door and brushes her caramel-brown hair from her face. My little sister Mack looks so much like her.
“Perry, I would like you to come down and have dinner with us more often. It would be nice for you and your father to talk more.”
My eyes roll to the heavens. “Be serious, mom. I work with him eight hours a day, sometimes more—shouldn’t that be enough?”
Her eyes turn to the floor for a moment and I already feel like a dick. She’s been trying so hard to get us to find some common ground, but what she doesn’t realize is that we never had any. It’s always been difficult between us, which was only amplified by my time in the pen.
I place my hand on her shoulder. “Hey, what are you making?”
This causes her lips to turn up. “Chicken and potatoes. Your favorite.”
I hold my hand over my heart. “You know just how to get me in the feels.”
“You’ll come, really?”
Her eyes are now hopeful and I lean down and kiss her cheek. “I wouldn’t miss it.”
With an extra spring in her step, she grabs my laundry and practically skips down the stairs. Now if only my dad would have the same reaction.
I spend the rest of the day scrolling through social media. I still don’t understand most of this shit, but I keep going back to one page in particular. I’ll never get tired of seeing Sloan’s face.
No matter how much she tortures me.
The next time I look at the clock, it’s almost six. Running back to my bedroom, I grab the only clean pair of jeans I have and a fitted black tee. I need to go shopping soon. The only two looks I have are everyday thug, or court appearance. I need some everyday casual. With a final glance in the mirror, I decide I look respectable enough to have dinner with my parents.
As I’m rounding the corner into the living room, the face that greets me through the glass front door isn’t one I expect. She must have her socials rigged with GPS or something. My stomach knots and I consider jumping out of the window to avoid her. On the flip side, the really fucked up part of my brain wants to run to her. Hold her against me and never let go. Currently, I’m somewhere in the middle.
Sloan fumbles with her dress and tucks her hair behind her ear while she waits for me to make up my mind. With a deep breath, I walk over and pull the door back halfway.
I lean on the doorframe. “What are you doing here, Sloan?”
Her large grey eyes meet mine and I almost break. It’s been two years since she looked at me like that, but I still see them every time I close my eyes.
“I was worried about you.”
I scoff. “Worried about me, huh?” I cock my head down to her. “Is that why you never once came to visit me or wrote me even one letter?”
She looks down at her hands. “I tried, I just…”
I clap my hands in mock applause, cutting her off. “Thanks, Sloan. So fucking considerate of you while your boyfriend rots in prison.”
She looks up at me again. “You told me not to.”
“And it was so easy for you.”
Her nose scrunches and I can tell she’s getting pissed.
I nod, my features rigid. “Okay, so get the fuck out.”
I move to slam the door, but she steps in between. “Perry, please.”
The hand that is clutching mine has a new addition on it since I’ve seen it last. I grab it and push it up into her face.
“Congrats, baby. Sorry I didn’t send a card. I’ve been busy.”
Sloan sighs. “God, Perry. What did you want me to do?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Fucking wait for me?” I throw my arms up and she continues to have a passive look on her face. It’s like her heart is made of blackened souls.
She bites her lip and turns her head. I can tell she’s thinking, or more so regretting coming here. Or maybe she’s being sneaky and doesn’t want to get caught. When she turns back to me I see the familiar tears in the corners of her eyes.
“Can I come in?”
I step back without another word, and she slips past me. I close the door and watch her set her over-sized handbag on the counter. She pauses, taking in the place, before turning back to me.
“I miss you.”
I squeeze my eyes tight. “Sloan, please don’t do this. I seriously can’t fucking handle it right now.”
With my eyes closed, I don’t see her walk over to me until her hands are on my arms. Slowly I open my eyes and her lips are inches from mine.
“What do you want from me?” I whisper.
Instead of responding, she wraps her arms around my waist and lays her head on my chest. Instinctively, I begin the run my hand down her hair. She hums against me and I fight with everything I have left to hold it together.
When I pull back, she tightens her grip. “Not yet,” she whispers. “I’ve waited so long for this moment.”
I lean my cheek against the side of her forehead and release a sigh. “I’m never going to get over you if you keep doing things like this.” I pull back and hold her face in my hands. “My heart can’t take it.”
While I wait for her rebuttal, she does something unexpected. She kisses me. It’s soft and measured at first, but then her hands travel up my neck and pull me into her deeper. Our tongues dance together like they never stopped, and before I know it, I have her lifted into the air and am walking backwards towards my bedroom.
Breathlessly, she pulls away, and I set her on her feet. I take in the cinched waist of her dress and those long, tanned legs that I would have gladly suffocated for.
She bites her lip. “What now?”
I reach behind me and pull my shirt over my head. I catch her chest rise quickly when she takes in my bulkier form. One thing prison is good for is getting stacked.
I nod to her. “Take off your dress.”
She doesn’t hesitate to lower the zipper and let it fall to the floor at her feet. She steps out of it and stands in front of me in only a black bra and matching panties. As tight and perfect as her body looks, something is distracting me.
My eyes drift to her left hand. She followers my gaze and shifts it behind her back.
I shake my head. “No, baby. You want me… you take that ring off.”
Sloan seems conflicted, but then twists the multi-carat sparkler off and lets it clang on my dresser. “Better?”
This time I nod. “Yes, much.”
She steps over to me and begins to remove my pants while I kiss my way down her neck. When she gets them off, I kick them to the side and grab her by her hips, pushing her onto the bed. She leans up on her elbows and watches me while I lick a trail up her leg to her panties. I hook one finger inside, pulling the fabric to the side.
I pause, looking up at her. “Did you say that you miss me?” I lick once slowly up her center and stop. She reaches down to the stubble on top of my head.
“Yes, Perry, I miss you so much.”
I smirk and drag my tongue through her slick folds once more. She releases a frustrated cry and bucks her hips along my face, but I hold her down.
I tilt my head. “Do you love me, Sloan?”
This time the pleasure in her eyes turns into something else. She closes them so I can’t see and whispers, “Yes.”
Unable to tell if she’s lying, I move away from her and grab a condom out of my bedside drawer. Her eyes open again when she hears the foil packet. I position myself in front of her and watch her face.
“You want me?”
Instead of a yes or no answer, she whispers to me again. “Always.”
Even if I believed her, which I fucking don’t, I roll the condom over my dick, anyway. We’re both adults now. We both want this. I don’t need any kind of validation from her in order to get off. This isn’t about love, and I’m not stupid enough to believe it could be.
Sloan’s eyes are closed when I lower myself between her legs. I kiss a trail between her breasts and up to her lips before inching inside. She moans into my mouth and I thrust the rest of the way in. This causes her eyes to pop back open, her mouth parting with a sharp breath. She watches my face for a moment, searching for the regret we both should feel.
It isn’t there and I lean down and catch her lips, drowning her moans with a kiss. I don’t stop even though she doesn’t belong to me anymore. Maybe she never did, but right now I don’t care. I want her more than I want to be good, and if I’m really being honest, it’s always been that way. Two people unapologetically wrong for each other but can never stay away.
When her eyes drift closed once more, I kiss up her neck. My teeth graze her skin as she cries out my name. A whisper on her lips I’ve heard a thousand times. It haunts my dreams like a nightmare, reminding me of everything I lost.
Her moans get louder and it makes my movements more forceful. I can’t be slow with her. I’m thrusting hard, the bedframe screeching in protest. She grips my chin with her nails, pulling me to her mouth with wet, desperate kisses.
One of my hands grips the headboard while the other clutches her hip so roughly it will no doubt leave a mark. A reminder she can take home to her fiancé so she remembers how wrong this is.
“Perry,” she breathes when I slow. “Don’t stop.”
I raise my head to see her face and the pleading in her eyes. Her fingers dig into my back and I give in to her. I pick back up a punishing rhythm and all of her tight muscles clench around my cock at once. My release comes before hers and I empty inside of her with a strangled grunt. She continues to cling to me as I give her two more thrusts before pulling out.
With a chaste kiss to her lips, I slide off the bed and walk straight to the bathroom to clean up. She’s still curled in my blanket as I step back into the room and reach for my pants.
“Are you leaving?” she asks, leaning up on her elbow.
I nod. “Yep. I have dinner with my parents.” I pull on my shirt and she is still staring at me.
“And you’re just going to leave me here?”
While buttoning my pants, I shrug. “Don’t you have like a fiancé waiting at home or something?”
“Real nice, Perry,” she sneers. She throws the blanket off of her and fluffs her hair. “Shall I tell him how I spent my afternoon, or would that be too much?”
I roll my eyes. “It was your choice to come here. You knew what was going to happen.”
She pulls her dress up and adjusts the straps. “Really? I knew I was going to come here and realize that I was still in love with you?”
The anger on her face doesn’t match her words. I can’t seem to form sentences. I spot the cigarette that must have fallen from behind my ear and reach for it. She rolls her eyes when I light it and take a much-needed drag.
Sloan crosses her arms. “Well?”
I laugh. “Well, what? You want me to tell you I spent the past two years pining away for you and how this evening all my fucking dreams finally came true?” I narrow my eyes at her. “Because I won’t.”
She shakes her head, tears glistening in the corners of her eyes. “You don’t mean that.”
I snub my cigarette out in the ashtray and walk over to her. “You know how I feel about
you. I’ve made that very clear to you many, many times, but I refuse to be your dirty little secret while you prance around acting like your life is perfect.”
She wipes her eyes and reaches for her bag. When she turns back to me I take a deep breath. “It’s not perfect.” She laughs once. “My life is far from it. I’m not lying when I say I miss you. I do. I miss you every day and I can’t stop. I know that’s not fair, but it’s the truth.”
I bite my tongue. There are so many things I could say that would send her out of here hating the asshole that I am, but I can’t. She knows what to say to keep my heart beating just a little faster than it should. She’s been doing it since we were fifteen and it works as good now as it did then.
She runs a hand through her hair and pauses at my door. “I had a feeling you’d still be angry when I talked to Tess earlier this week. She didn’t seem too thrilled about me asking about you.”
My eyebrows pull in. “You talked to Bishop about me?”
She nods, pulling her sunglasses down. “Yeah, at the drug store. She’s really having a hard time.” She leans over and squeezes my arm. “I’m glad she still has you.”
I swallow the lump in my throat. If only that were true.
Sloan leans up on her toes and kisses my cheek. Her lips linger longer than usual. I turn my face quickly and catch her lips. Surprised, she touches her lips with her fingertips when I pull away.
“I love you, Sloan.”
She gives a sad smile before turning and walking out of my door. I close it behind her and slam my fist against the wood. So far, out of the two problems I’ve been trying to make better, I only made them worse.
5
Vices
Tess- Now
Being jolted out of sleep at two in the morning is nothing new. The thing is, it hasn’t happened in years. I glance at the clock beside my bed and sit up, rubbing my eyes. My phone rings again and I reach for it. I answer without checking the display.
