What kind of comfort was this? I tossed the question around my mind as I lay in the dark quietly. I could look back and admit that I’d been drawn to Boyce somewhere after starting middle school. I never pursued anything and dated boys my own age, but I remembered how worried Boyce was back then. Was he jealous?
The boys I dated through school were boys in every sense of the word. I always found Boyce to be sexy with his easy confidence and desire to succeed. He provided his family a good life when Nora was still alive and even after that when I moved into the house. I never wanted for anything, which was largely in part to my own parent’s planning, but I knew how much Boyce did for me. I knew how lucky I was that I got to come here rather than living in foster care or with a distant relative that barely knew me.
I thought back to the nights when I’d listen to him with other women. I was embarrassed at first but then realized how hot it was. I wanted sex to be like that for me and I chased that dream with a handful of guys through high school. I wasn’t a slut by any means and I didn’t sleep with guys that I didn’t care about, but I was curious. It never felt like I thought that it would. It never made me want to scream the way that Boyce’s women did, but now I understood why.
I smiled as I drifted off to sleep and groaned when my alarm went off. I didn’t want the erotic dream to end as I reached for my phone to hit the snooze button, needing some more time with Boyce. I got out of bed with enough time to shower and pull on some leggings with a sweatshirt before I shuffled out of the apartment. I walked to the campus and grabbed a coffee before class, slipping into the back row.
I told myself that it was good that I was dating off-campus. I could focus on my classes that way and achieve my goals. I slipped up at the party but that wouldn’t happen again. I was willing to allow Boyce to own my body and I opened my notebook and glanced up at the board in the front of the class, jotting down some notes.
I saw Miranda as I went to grab some lunch and she darted over to me with a huge smile. “Hey, there. How are you?”
“I’m good. How are you doing?” I asked her as I dropped the empty coffee cup into the trash at the entrance to the cafeteria.
“Great. So, I have Billy in my class just before this and he’s asking about you. He wants to see you again!” Miranda looked at me expectantly and I pressed my lips together as I tried to figure out what to say.
“He is?” I asked softly as she nodded and told me about another party the upcoming weekend. This was a birthday party and she gushed about how infamous the frat birthday parties were. “You have to come. He’s looking forward to another night with you.”
There was nothing special about the night that we already shared. In fact, there was nothing at all that stood out about it at all. “I am kind of seeing someone back home. It’s not serious which is why I didn’t make a big deal about it, but I want to focus on school when I am here and on him when I am there.” I met her frown and shrugged. “I don’t want to see Billy again.”
“You’re seeing someone. Who?” Miranda asked me as I walked forward to order my sandwich.
“Just a guy. It’s casual.” I smiled at her before ordering and she gave me a shrewd look. Miranda ordered her chicken sandwich and we moved along to grab drinks and some of the cookies the school served. She didn’t say anything until we were sitting at a table and it was then that she looked closely at me.
“You are having the best sex of your life, aren’t you? I can see it in your eyes, Vivian. Who is he?” She demanded as she leaned forward and stared into my eyes.
“It is a guy that I started seeing before I came here. Since I am not that far away, we decided to keep it going, but he isn’t stepping in the way of school for me. We just go back and forth,” I tried to be vague and she sipped her soda and unwrapped her sandwich.
“I don’t see casual in your face, Vivian. I don’t know you well, but I know what a girl looks like when she is feeling something for a guy.” I watched her shake her head as I picked up half of my sandwich. I couldn’t tell her who I was sleeping with. I wouldn’t tell her how old he was or how I knew him. I did wonder what look was on my face that gave my feelings away, vowing to work on that.
Bella could never know that I was sleeping with her father.
I was surprised later in the week when I arrived to find a box on my front porch. I carried it inside, using two hands since it was big, getting my backpack once it was inside. I stared at it, seeing no company name on it anywhere as I tried to remember if I ordered something. I grabbed the scissors from my desk and sliced through the tape carefully before I lifted the lid. I peered inside to see a lot of brown packaging and pulled it out slowly as I tried to see what was inside. “Oh, shit,” I murmured as I pulled out a box and looked at the picture on it as my skin heated up. I reached for my phone and dialed a number, waiting for the voice on the other line. “What in the ever-loving hell did you do?” I asked Boyce after he answered with a chuckle.
“I thought you might need a little something to keep you company on our nights apart.” I dropped the first box and reached in for another one, finding an even larger dildo.
“A little something? There is a lot of stuff in here,” I protested as I kept lifting boxes out. “I don’t even know how to use some of this stuff, Boyce.”
“I will have no problem showing you in person. I know what makes you tick and I ordered appropriately for your needs,” he assured me as I rested my head in my hands. “Just play around until we see each other again. Have some fun, Vivian.”
“I have never even walked into a store for this stuff before. Is there nothing that you haven’t done?” I asked softly, realizing that he had a lot more experience under his belt. I wondered if he liked to use his belt and blushed.
“It is all different with you, Vivian.” I heard the sincerity in his voice, but I let insecurity flood me for a moment. I knew that I was willing to give him any part of my body that he craved, but was it enough for him? Would Boyce get bored with me and move onto another woman? “Vivian? Are you there?”
“Yeah,” I replied, bringing myself back to the present.
“There is a green vibrator in the box. I want you to take that to your bedroom for me.” I blinked, realizing that he was going to listen to me with these toys. I sorted through the boxes, finding something that looked like it would penetrate me as well as tease my clit. It was the only thing that was green, and I locked my door before walking to my bed. “Are you there?”
“Yes,” I said as I dropped down to the mattress. I sucked in my breath and waited for instructions as I dropped back to my pillows, still messy from this morning.
“Take off your clothes, please. All of them,” Boyce told me as desire flooded my thighs. I told him to hold on and dropped the phone to undress, feeling desperate for a release suddenly. The room was hot, and I ran a hand through my hair.
“Boyce,” I moaned as I spread my legs wide. He told me to open the box and I did, turning the rubber device around in my hands. Boyce murmured dirty things to me as I followed his directions and turned it on, jumping as the vibration started against my finger. He told me to slide it around my clit with the setting set to low, and I cried out as it touched me. Soon I was thrusting it inside of me, each movement causing the nub to touch my clit and send me into cries of pleasure. Boyce talked me through it, soon moaning my name as I heard him jerking himself off. I turned the speed up and screamed his name as I came, pressing the vibrator against me as I jerked forward.
I dropped my hand to the side and breathed in deeply. I had neighbors that just heard a lot more of me than I ever intended, and I blushed at the thought. “I can’t wait for you to be with me again. There are some special surprises in that box for us,” Boyce told me as I smiled weakly.
CHAPTER 13
Boyce
There was a part of me that wanted to get into my car and drive right to her place after what I just heard. Vivian screamed for me once she got that giant rubbed cock inside o
f her and turned it up to full speed. It was the hottest thing that I ever heard.
“Come back this weekend. Come back to me,” I told her as I heard the sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line.
“I will. I’ll come back Friday night,” Vivian promised me as I relaxed completely against my pillows. I missed her. I needed Vivian here with me as much as possible and I closed my eyes, feeling complete. I fell asleep to the sound of her even breathing at the other end of the line, knowing that we would both have dead phones the following day. I didn’t care.
I went into work late the next day, needing the rest. I knew that everything was going to run smoothly if I skipped a morning. I built the company from the ground and did it well. My company was the top grossing architecture firm on the East Coast. I could afford to relax now a little bit.
I went down and greeted Anne as she gave me a surprised gaze. “What are you doing here?”
“I slept in,” I replied as she nodded approvingly. Since I was living here primarily alone now, Anne just came in and prepared meals for me ahead of time. I told her that the girls might be coming back for weekends, so she made some favorites of theirs.
“I assume that it will be Vivian visiting most of the time. Bella seems so far away. How is she doing?” Anne asked as I sat down with some coffee.
“She’s right back to it. I know that she hurts a bit, but Bella does not like to stop. She never has.” I smiled as Anne laughed.
“A chip of the old block?” I smiled and nodded. Nora was the same way when she was alive, and Bella got a little bit of both of us. “How is Vivian?”
“She seems to be doing well at school. I saw her last weekend for a bit when she came to get some stuff.”
“It must be nice to have the place to yourself again. You can really start to live for yourself now after devoting yourself to both of those kids for so long. It’s what Nora would want for you.” Anne smiled warmly at me as I shifted on the stool.
“I’m just enjoying the quiet. I don’t need a relationship right now.” I knew I was lying as I spoke because I was in something of a relationship right now. I just couldn’t tell Anne and face her wrath. She would think I was a monster.
“You’re a good man, Boyce. Don’t wait too long for happiness,” Anne said softly as she turned to work on breakfast. I told her that it wasn’t necessary, but Anne took care of me well. I ate the eggs and toast and read the paper that was still delivered daily to my house, letting the phone charge up in my room. Anne worked on dinners after I put my plate in the sink and headed upstairs to dress for work. I drove in around ten-thirty and the staff looked at me quickly as I walked by.
I was known for being a workaholic and this was unusual for me, but the company was doing just fine. I hired the best management and staff and my being here was just to stay busy. It was funny to me. I knew that I was supposed to be happy that I had the house to myself now and live like an empty nester, but I missed the sounds of the girls in the house. It was too big to be that quiet all the time. I agreed to meet some friends for a late dinner and left at seven to go to the corner deli that we all liked.
They greeted me as I slipped into the booth, ordering a beer from the usual waitress. She nodded and walked off to get it as I looked at my friends. It was no secret that Mary had the hots for me since she flirted heavily with me every time I came here. When I was married, I ignored it for the most part. After Nora passed away, I considered a night with her but there was too much familiarity in our routine. I didn’t want to complicate that, so I kept it to strangers at bars that I wouldn’t see again.
Until Vivian. Now I was back to feeling little about Mary’s crush.
They have me shit about giving Mary a chance even though I explained my hesitation in the past. I looked at Ned and rolled my eyes as he laughed at the others, telling them that not everyone was a horn dog like they were. Barry raised his brows, knowing how I’d been in the past as I thanked Mary for my drink, making her blush. “Are you seeing someone, Boyce? You’ve been on your own for a while.” Chris remarked as he looked at me with a curious gaze.
“I am sleeping with someone casually,” I told them, intending to keep it vague.
“As in regularly?” Barry asked as I shrugged.
“Sure. I do have the house to myself now,” I responded as he nodded.
“Are we going to meet her?” Ned asked as I almost choked on my beer. These guys would call me a hero, but I didn’t want them to know about Vivian.
“I doubt it. Like I said, it’s casual.” I was relieved when the subject was changed, and we moved on to sports as we ate. They mentioned going to a hockey game soon and I agreed since we had season tickets in a great section. I had that for all the local teams. I considered taking Vivian to some games, knowing that it might draw some attention to us. I could tell anybody that she was like a daughter to me and visiting from college though I’d have to keep my hands off her. That would be hard since sex in the box with Vivian sounded hot as hell. I excused myself around nine, using the excuse of an early morning at the office before I walked to my apartment. I had three beers with dinner and didn’t want to risk driving right now and I was hoping to talk to Vivian before she went to bed for the night.
I called her once I was settled on the couch, pleased to hear that she was hoping to hear from me. I asked how her day was and she did the same for me before the conversation turned sexual and she opened another toy, this time something that focused on her clit. I listened as she lost control on the other end, jerking my cock as she came. “Fuck me. I can’t stand being apart,” I murmured as she took a deep breath.
“We have to. This was always the plan, Boyce.” Her reminder was gentle, and I groaned. “We have this and the weekends that we visit each other. That has to be enough until you find someone that you care about.” Her voice sounded sad as my dick went limp after the release and her words.
“You think that’s going to happen?” I asked her as she sighed.
“I know it is. This is just sex for now. This is us getting this out of our system.” Vivian was honest, and I sucked in my breath. “Boyce, we can’t be together, not for real.”
“You’re right,” I agreed, coming to my senses as I nodded. We chatted for a bit longer but there was a strain to the conversation. I told her that I’d call her the following night and hung up, dropping back on the couch with a sigh. I couldn’t tell Vivian yet, but I felt like I was falling for her. It was going to be difficult, but I would try to fight it, moving on when the time was right.
I noted that I got Vivian’s voice mail when I called the following evening. I left her a message and looked out to the water since I was home tonight. This place made me feel close to Vivian and my memories here, many that involved my wife. I loved her madly and was a mess when she died, but I knew that she’d want me to be happy. I just wondered if she hated me for who I chose this time around.
I dropped into bed to the sound of the TV again, forcing myself to relax. I couldn’t help but to wonder if she was pulling away from me. I wasn’t ready for that and something filled my chest that I was unfamiliar with, something that vaguely reminded me of losing Nora. Fuck no. Vivian wasn’t Nora.
CHAPTER 14
Vivian
I reached for my tea, sipping it slowly as I took a break from studying for my test. I glanced back towards my bedroom, knowing that my phone was charging in there. I didn’t want the distraction of Boyce even though he was in my every thought. I heard something in his voice when he mentioned moving on from what we had, and it scared me. He sounded like I felt inside, and I sighed.
I adjusted my messy bun and looked down at the book in my lap. I knew most of the information by now since I remembered things easily, but there was that fuzzy part of my brain that was lost in thoughts of Boyce. I knew that I cared for him as more than just an affair though the idea of how forbidden it was did excite me. It was something that would always make me smile even when my heart was breaking
when he was gone. Boyce showed me a taste of what life might be like when I was older and getting past college and I loved the preview. My parents always told me that I was an old soul and they were right.
I stretched and yawned before starting on the book again. I had a test every day this week and it was going to be a long one, making me thankful that I was getting away this weekend. I needed the bay and my room with the breeze. I loved my little town here, but I didn’t think it would ever feel like home to me. Bella was loving New York and talking about staying there for an extra week at Christmas if she got a part in a play. She’d be home for the main holiday but leaving just a couple of days afterward. I selfishly felt happy that I’d be alone with Boyce during that time. Family would be at the house for meals and the main celebrations, but we’d be alone at night. I craved the idea of sleeping in his bed for several nights, making love until we fell asleep from exhaustion. I could make breakfast and play house with Boyce and I closed my eyes and sighed.
I hadn’t spoken to him in a couple of days. I was trying to focus on school and just stepping back a little bit. I could get myself off with the gifts that he sent me, and I did, but it wasn’t the same without his dirty talk urging me to go harder. I needed to hear him coming as well, knowing that I was the one turning him on. I also liked to think that he was being exclusive to me for this time even though we didn’t discuss it in detail.
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