“I remember my water breaking, and then a dim headlight, heading right toward me. That’s when I looked down to my hand, to the biggest feather I’d ever found in my life, sure it was a turkey feather. Of course it was, I was on Turkey Ridge and it didn’t get that name for its abundance of ostriches, but it wasn’t a turkey feather. It was a long, white swan feather and also, my sign. I wasn’t alone and when I looked up and saw my knight in shining armor, I knew he was my sign, too. Even if I didn’t want him to be. I knew it. It wasn’t until later though, after we’d gone to the hospital and had a baby, that I’d realized that. After he told me his name. The same name the fortuneteller had insisted I knew. Here’s your sign,” she added with a nod, never disclosing my name.
This wasn’t the only thing that hit a nerve with me. There was at least ten more that caused a sting and planted seeds. It was late into the night by the time she’d finally called it a night and ended the gathering with a simple line.
“Simple down, guys. Simple down and be happy. That’s why you’re here. Money doesn’t make you happy, yachts don’t make you happy, fame doesn’t make you happy, and money doesn’t make you happy. And I don’t need to hear the whole thing about money making life a lot more fun. I’m not saying it doesn’t. I’m saying it doesn’t make you happy. You can go out and buy as many distracting toys as you want, but that doesn’t mean you’re happy, and I respectfully call bullshit if you think it does. Go drop a few thousand dollars into clean water for a third world country, then tell me which one makes you happier.”
“I don’t care if you’re black, white, Christian, Jewish, Catholic, a cop, a veteran, a drug addict, a man, woman, or a man who dresses like a woman. We’re all calling the same place, guys, and it starts with the man in the mirror. We are the change and it’s time we come together and say enough. This planet is in the midst of a great awakening, and you’re invited to the party. Be the change. Be the one called a tin hat, a conspiracy theorist or a free thinker. Let them call you what they want and be proud for being different. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Justice is what love looks like in public. Go to your protests to spread peace. Don’t resist. That’s what they want you to do. Send everyone you see love and blessings. What you put out comes back. It can’t work any other way, guys. That universal law trumps any fucked up law of the land there is. Call peace out and refuse to be a part of anymore wars, segregation, or the propaganda. Simple down, guys. Simple down.”
Chapter Twenty-One
Not only was Baby-T, starting to stir, wanting his mama and a late night snack, I seemed to be having some sort of withdraw as well. I’d just spent three hours listening to her touch a group of people with electrifying vibes, including me. The strange part about it was, she didn’t really teach anything that everyone didn’t already know. We do know, we’re just too distracted to remember that we don’t have to do better, and consume; we have to be better. I forget where Tristan said she heard it, but it sunk in right that moment, something about not being able to help everyone, but everyone being able to help someone. That was true.
I stood with Baby-T and walked toward her, but so did everyone else. People wanting to talk to her about ideas they had for rallies, people wanting to say thank you, people wanting to hug her, people wanting to discuss ideas about projects they were working on, and of course Tristan listened to everyone, but I didn’t mind. Not really. As long as I could touch her if only a hand, and I could. As soon as she saw me, she pulled me to her, took Baby-T, and fell into me.
Baby-T was good and pissed off by the time we finally walked back to our site. Tristan had to feed him on the way; he was so upset. “I’m sorry, yes, I know, you’re so hungry. Poor little guy.”
“I don’t know what to say to you, T. You’re famous. You had these people eating out of your hand. Even me.”
Even through the dark, I could tell Tristan wore a smile when she turned to look at me. “Does that mean you learned something?”
“Yes, a lot.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know. A lot.”
“A lot, but you can’t name one thing?”
“I learned that kids should be free to learn and grow into their own person without being ran through the same system as every other kid. I learned that Baby-T will always be able to think freely, question any and everything he wants, and doubt a belief he doesn’t know or isn’t ready to believe in yet. I listened, T. I did.”
We walked a few more steps in silence, stopping at the fire pit, I’d made with some stone from the nearby woods and field. “You promise, T?”
I turned to Tristan, my fingers brushing the hair from her face. “I swear on my life, but right now I’m mostly amazed by you. You have a gift, girl. People listen to you.”
Tristan blew out a puff of doubt, an audible breath felt just below my lips. “The only trouble with that is the fact that way more listen to the garbage that comes out of my mother’s mouth, but I’d say we reached a few souls today. At least I shook their foundations. I hope.”
“You did. I’m hungry.”
Tristan laughed and kissed me. Her head dropped to my chin and she rested it there, along with a deep breath. “Nana Mae brought some zucchini muffins by. You can have one of those.”
“Yuck. I’m not eating vegetables in muffins. You okay?”
Another deep breath filled her lungs and a short laugh mixed with exhaustion, exhaled between us. “That was a lot of energy. Sometimes it’s a little much because I’m so in tune with it. You know?”
No. I didn’t know, but I asked anyway. “Good energy?”
“For the most part. Different. You can shower first,” she said as she turned away, dismissing me with quick kiss like she didn’t want to discuss it.
“Do you want a fire?”
“Hmm, maybe. Let me see how I feel after a shower. I’m kind of tired.”
Unlike my shower back home, I had two gallons of water. That didn’t leave much time for everything I needed to process. It was a lot to take in, especially the fact that my girlfriend was so looked up to, so loved. Needless to say, five minutes later, I was out, clean, but feeling the effects of the eventful day myself.
Tristan was meditating, her eyes closed and her nose pointed toward the dramatic moon. A dark branch swayed just in front of it, causing it to be even more intense. Put Tristan in the picture and you have a beautiful painting. One that could be sold for thousands. At least I would have paid that.
I quietly sat down beside her, but she didn’t care that I interrupted. She scooted next to me, raising my arm herself. “Can you believe the turn out here, T? This is crazy to me.”
“How did everyone know about it without the Internet?”
“The Internet,” she laughed. “We’re all on the Internet here and there. We just don’t live on it, and we’d rather socialize like this. I mean, how many cool people did you meet today?”
She was right about that. I did meet a shit ton of people. Cool people. “A lot, but they came to see you, Tristan. That baffles me.”
“They didn’t come for me. They came for the community, for the friendship; for the hope.”
“How many do you think live like you? In their van fulltime?”
“I don’t know. A lot of them.”
“But I don’t understand how. Isn’t it against the law to live in your van?”
“Isn’t it against the constitution to be told where you can live? Of course it’s against the law. It’s against the law to gather rainwater. We can’t just keep letting them do this. The system is designed to keep you dependent. They don’t want you to be able to take care of yourself or your family. You need Monsanto for their poisoned food, you need the city water full of fluoride and chlorine.”
“But fluoride is good for your teeth.”
“Yes, and for keeping your child’s pineal gland from its full potential.”
Yeah…It was too late for this one. My brain couldn’t process anything els
e right now. I’d look that one up myself later on. “Feel better?” I questioned instead, my fingers gliding over sleeping Baby-T’s little hand.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I thought meditating would help, but it didn’t. I couldn’t stay focused long enough. I’m going to shower. You go eat one of Nana Mae’s muffins. They’re delicious.”
“Wait, I want him.”
“I’ll put him in his bed so you can eat something. Do you want to watch a movie?”
“Maybe, but I can eat a muffin with T-Man. Hand him over.”
I stood and took Baby-T, but then something happened. Something that I don’t know what or how. It wasn’t even planned. Our lips touched and our eyes closed. I breathed her, she breathed me, and we kissed, magically kissed, emotions passing through us that I didn’t understand. It was so strong, so intense, and so unexplainable. There had to be something with this whole twin flame soul thing. There had to be. This was impossible, this was unheard of, and this was…my life. Full of unconditional love that one couldn’t even imagine. A love like this was written in the stars. It had to be. What else could it be?
Tristan broke the contact with a raspy, panting voice. “I’m so in love with you, Tobias.”
I hadn’t even realized her hands were on my ribs until she moved them. That’s how connected I felt to her. Her hands never felt foreign, unless they were cold of course. And then I said something cheesy as hell. Something I hadn’t even realized I’d said. “Don’t ever stop letting me fall. I want to feel this for the rest of my life.”
Tristan pulled her head back, the heated tension between us coming to an abrupt halt. “Whoa, T. That was deep. Don’t ever stop letting me fall. That came from you? I better write that down. Those words just affected me like you wouldn’t believe. Like a bee sting. I love that, Tobias. I love it so much.”
Okay, maybe it wasn’t so cheesy. I pulled her close again, this time wearing an egotistical smile. Since I was already on a roll with cheesy talk, I thought I’d press my luck. “Thanks, I’ll tell you what. You don’t ever let me stop falling, and I’ll never let you stop falling. Deal?”
Tristan twisted her lips to the side, like she always did when she was about to burst my bubble. “It doesn’t work like that, Ty. You can’t put that on me anymore than I can put that on you. Stop looking for happiness on the outside. It’s not there. It’s right here, in your heart,” she dramatically and softly said, one hand going to her baby’s head and one to my chest. “This is happening between us because you’re happy and because I’m happy. As soon as you go expecting me to keep you that way, our talons will fail to untangle and we’ll hit the ground. If you were unhappy right now, I’d still be happy, but if I were unhappy, you would be, too. You control inside what affects you from the outside. You don’t get a word I’m saying, do you?”
I don’t know if it was because it’s what she did or what, but I mimicked her. My lips twisted to the side while my mind soaked in what I thought she was saying. “I think I do. Unicorns, Whales, and Eagles. You’re telling me that if you’re being a bitch and I feel like we’re not falling anymore, and we’re in two different nests, I should think about something else.”
Tristan smiled a warm smile and took a long deep breath and I knew I was right. “No, if we ever stop falling, push me. Don’t let me be in a different nest. Use that on your mom and dad. I’d rather you didn’t replace me with magical unicorns.”
Whatever, I was close. “How about magical kisses?”
Tristan giggled and pushed away when I tried to kiss her neck, more like bite. “Quit. Stop while you’re ahead.”
I stared after her walking away, a stupid smile stuck to my face. Rather than trying to find food with Baby-T, I kissed his soft lips and gently laid him in his bed, covering him with soft pink blanket. I searched around the cooler for something to eat, dreaming of a cheeseburger or a steak and finding nothing. Sighing, I looked to the counter and the bag of muffins. First I smelled them, then I took a pinch, and then I ate two of them.
“Oh my God, T. These are so good. Want one?”
“No, told you. Have I ever steered you wrong, dude?”
“Maybe that one time,” I teased, instantly pulling her to my lap.
“Lies.”
“Why did you say Baby-T was born in a hospital? You always tell me not to lie, even when it’s a little lie. You always say the truth is better.”
Tristan sighed, moved from my lap and rolled to her back, her hands going above her head. “I do think that, and if my mom wasn’t Vanna Wise, married to Clay Wise I might not care. I know this election process like the back of my hand. Those two are making so much money right now, getting way more attention than either of their ego’s need, and believe me, it’s being stroked. Everyone around them is making a big deal right now because they’re everywhere, and every network wants them.”
“So you’re ashamed of being associated with them? I don’t get it.”
“No, not at all. It’s not that. I know they’re on a different path than me, and I know they’ll get to this point eventually. It’s what we all come for. Once you’ve learned all the lessons, there’s not much reason to come back. I might come back again, I don’t know yet.”
I didn’t touch on that one either. Sometimes she was the magical unicorn, and some things were better left unsaid. Besides; even if it was all a bunch of wishful thinking, I didn’t like her talking like that, like she wasn’t coming back. Lord knew that if there was any truth to her faith, I’d be back a lot more times. It would take me another fifty life times or so to get to where Tristan was. If it were true that is. I wasn’t quite ready to believe I’d been here a few times before. “That doesn’t really explain why you lied about Tobias.”
“I don’t trust reporters and I don’t trust Clay. I didn’t lie to keep the attention off me. None of those sheeples even know who I am, but they know them. When Obama was elected his second term, I told them I was going to a wedding with a friend. Which I did, Marcie Wheeler’s sister. It wasn’t my fault the wedding was held in the same place a peaceful protest was going on. My first peaceful protest. I’d been to a few that weren’t so peaceful. I stood with a group of pissed off people, all holding discriminating signs, yelling profanity at a lab using helpless bunny rabbits to test bug repellant sprayed on lettuce. I’ve been to some pretty wicked protest where shots were fired, and I’ve even been pepper sprayed by a cop. Those protests are pointless, but at the time, I thought I was doing what my dad wanted me to do. Protest something worthwhile. I wasn’t, but I needed to be there to see the difference. I still needed the lesson. This one was different than anything I’d ever witnessed.”
I listened to Tristan like my life depended on it. She truly was one of a kind. While the people most of us hang out with were busy buying Abercrombie at a mall, Tristan was trying to save bunny rabbits.
“I know it’s hard for you to understand, T, but I really do feel people. That’s why I’m beat right now. It’s a lot for me to be around crowds sometimes. I never felt good after doing a protest where fights broke out, streets were destroyed, or someone got hurt, but I thought it’s what my dad wanted so I did it. One time when I was about twelve or so, I snuck off to protest an abortion clinic. Someone who worked against Clay and my mom followed me and took some photos, and even a video of me acting like a total nut job. I mean straight up crazy. I was screaming in this cops face, like it was his fault they were killing babies, but he wasn’t shouting back. He just stood there and looked at me.”
“Your mom was pissed?”
“No, not at all. She used it to her advantage. She thanked me for the ratings they’d gotten that night while debating in Cleveland Ohio. I was made out to be her daughter out there standing up for something she believed in. They made me this twelve-year-old political prodigy, and tried to use it to feed me the same poison. Clay offered to get me some acting classes, and a gig with a radio station for political kids. Of course I declined, crawled back under my rock, an
d went under the radar again. The attention I was getting had nothing to do with the abortion clinic and everything to do with politics. It made me sick. Literally. I’m not the least bit interested in gaining likes or followers. I just want people to realize what the hell is going on and start doing something to make it better.”
“Then you accidently found a peaceful protest?” I questioned. Tristan had a way of trailing off and never getting back to the point. Not that she was ditzy or anything; more like passionate about the things she believed in. Passion that I’d never seen in my life.
“Nothing is on accident, my love,” she reminded me with a kiss. “While Marcie did family things with her sister, dress rehearsal, dinners, shopping, whatever comes with all that propaganda bullshit, I witnessed the protest my dad spoke of on the tape. Up until that time, I didn’t get it; why my dad, spreader of all good, would be a part of something so hostile and mean.”
“I was walking through the streets when I saw them. They weren’t doing anything at all, and unlike the cop who’d let me scream in his face and act like a belligerent idiot, these cops were the ones being the idiots. The people holding the signs were the ones calling peace. They didn’t want trouble; they just wanted to have control over what went into their food. It was the first time I’d ever heard the name Monsanto. The people protesting all wore shirts that said, viral peace, hug me to catch it. All the signs had a positive message and nobody was angry. Except the cops of course, but they weren’t there to protect the protesters, they were there to protect the billion dollar company who wanted control of our food.”
“So you ditched the wedding to protest?”
She glanced at me like I was crazy. “Duh, of course. You know me. Every time I went into that church I cringed. You should know by now that I don’t see God as this man in the clouds wearing white, ready to send me to hell for not obeying the laws of the land. I hate religion. Anyway, It was at least a ten-thousand-dollar wedding. I couldn’t get past the homeless guy right outside the door that nobody helped; yet there was all this money to waste on an event. They didn’t even stay married for three months. How ridiculous is that?”
Peace Love Resistance Page 30
