by M. S. Parker
His weight was hot and startling, the feel of all those muscled and angled planes feeling utterly alien.
The one lover I’d been with had felt nothing like this.
He pushed his hand into my hair, and I stared at him, entranced as he slowly twined the thick, silky mass around his fingers. “Your hair is beautiful.”
I might have said thank you, but then I felt him nudging against my entrance, and my lashes fluttered shut.
He lifted one hand to my neck, using his thumb to nudge my chin up. “Look at me, Lexi.”
I couldn’t disobey that rough command, and I lifted my lids to find his intense gaze locked on my face.
“That’s better. I want to see your eyes as I fuck you.”
My breathing hitched, and I realized there was a more vulnerable position for a woman to be in. It was this one, with a man’s cock pressing against her folds, demanding entrance while he stared as if memorizing every last expression, from her ragged breaths to her startled cries.
One of those startled cries ripped out of me as he flexed his hips and thrust deep, seating himself inside me with one hard lunge.
I went to grab at him. He gently caught my injured wrist. There was a twinge of pain, but it was lost in the erotic sensation of having him stretch me. With my good hand, I clung to his bicep, gasping as he withdrew, then filled me again, just as hard, just as deep, just as fast.
It went straight to my head, and I knew without a doubt if he kept this pace up, I’d very shortly be shivering and moaning as I came around him.
As if he sensed that very thing, he adjusted his rhythm and moved higher on my body, his thrusts going slow, almost torturously so. I sank my short nails into his arm and lifted up, trying to goad him back into that sweet, fast pace.
But he kept it slow, even pushing up onto his hands and staring at me as he rocked against me.
He shifted one hand up over my shoulder, smoothing the other one down until he could cup my breast in his hand. He rolled the aching nipple back and forth between his finger and thumb, stopping from time to time to tug on me. That light pull of his fingers arrowed right through me and echoed down in my pussy, forcing me to contract around him.
That was the first sign that this was having the same sort of effect on him. He closed his eyes.
In echo of his earlier comment, I said, “Look at me…I want to see you.”
The thick fringe of his lashes lifted. A muscle pulsed in his jaw, and he thrust harder into the cradle of my hips.
I arched up with a ragged moan, and he dropped his weight back down on me, shoving one hand down to palm my ass. He lifted me up, changing the angle of my lower body and the next thrust had him pressing right against my clit.
Another one of those unfamiliar, foreign sounds escaped me, part moan, part cry, all need.
He moved faster and was soon back to the driving rhythm that had so delighted me only moments ago. His cock throbbed as it rasped over sensitive tissues, and I whimpered as I felt my climax raging closer.
He saw it too. I could tell just by looking in his eyes. Hot, sexual male hunger gleamed down at me, and it only added to the sheer eroticism.
I came, hoarsely crying his name out.
He slammed his mouth down on mine and drank the noise down, while against me, his long, powerful body shuddered. He thrust inside me once more, then held there.
I felt the pulsations of his cock jerking within me and knew he was coming too.
As he sank down to rest his head against my chest, he muttered something under his breath.
It was my name.
Twelve
Roman
I was a colossal idiot.
That was the most-polite phrase I’d come up with to describe my actions over the past hour. I’d cursed myself in every language I knew, then started all over again in English, the self-directed anger becoming more and more intense as the minutes ticked by into hours.
Lexi lay sleeping on the bed, huddled under the blankets, with just the tip of her toes peeking out. She had all but wrapped herself in the covers, cocooning herself in their warmth.
I wanted to go back to her and curve my body up behind hers, sharing my heat.
But I’d already done one incredibly stupid thing.
I didn’t need to compound it by cuddling with her.
The logical part of me kept demanding answers. What had I been thinking? Had I lost my mind?
I had no real response to those internal questions, other than the fact that I hadn’t wanted to talk about the plane or about Cass, and giving into the strange, sudden attraction I’d felt for her almost from the get-go had been one hell of a diversion tactic.
It had worked a little too well, though, because I’d let myself get distracted as well.
By the time I’d freed myself from the tangle we’d made of the blankets, Lexi had been asleep, and the fire had started to burn down. We’d need the fire for its warmth, so I’d been able to busy myself with the simple task of adding more logs and waiting for them to catch flame before retreating back to the couch. It was the only place to sit save for one of the hard, ladder-back chairs at the table, and as pissed off as I was at myself, I wasn’t about to subject my sore ass to that kind of punishment.
Across the room from me, Lexi sighed and rolled over onto her left side. A sharp noise escaped her, and her lids fluttered, lines fanning out from her mouth as if in pain. She must have bumped her wrist or her ankle.
I watched another moment to make sure she wasn’t going to wake up, then I slumped back into the couch cushions and pondered what had happened.
It had been years since I’d been with a woman. Guilt and a need for self-isolation had pushed things like sex over to the wayside.
For a long while, I’d completely lost interest in sex. The mess in my head and memories haunting me had made it easy for me to compartmentalize a lot of things, relying on just the necessary actions to get through, each and every new day.
Sex, to my surprise, hadn’t been as necessary as I’d once thought.
Unless that was sex with Lexi.
I had a bad feeling she was like heroin – one taste and I was addicted. I wanted so much more than what we’d had, and that was something that wasn’t going to happen.
There were too many things in the way, and even if there weren’t, I didn’t deserve a woman like Lexi.
Even after only a few hours in her presence, I’d come to understand certain things about her. She was strong, determined and resourceful. She didn’t bellyache over the little things, and she’d handled even the big things without panicking – getting caught in a trapper’s illegal snare had to count as big.
She sighed in her sleep, and I shifted my attention back to her just in time to see a faint smile curl her lips.
Resisting the urge to return to the bed and tug her up against me, I wondered just what it was that had such a sly little smile curling her lips while she slept.
“You’ve got to stop this shit,” I told myself, rising and stalking over to the window.
The snow that had hampered our search had finally started to lessen. It looked like there were a few inches of the fluffy white stuff on the ground. It wasn’t anything that would prevent some sure-footed, experienced hikers from hitting the trails if there was a need for it, but with Lexi’s swollen ankle and likely broken wrist, I couldn’t call her sure-footed. Not now, at least.
She had been, moving through the forest with an ease and confidence that spoke of somebody who’d been doing it for a long while.
The only thing I could take comfort in was the fact that despite her fall and the pain in her ankle, she likely only had a sprain and that would heal. She could go rest up and heal, then easily return to her ranger job here in the Rockies.
Of course, that was assuming she didn’t end up in trouble for aiding me.
Even more than ever, I now wished I’d just gone on by myself. She wasn’t just stranded and injured in a small ranger’s cabin, sev
eral miles from the rest of her group, she could be looking at disciplinary action of some sort.
I had no idea how a forest ranger unit operated, but I did know that some forest rangers were commissioned peace officers, which made them law enforcement. Any time it came to law enforcement, there were procedures to be followed, and shit could ensue if those procedures were ignored. I’d likely screwed with her career on top of getting her injured.
And it hadn’t even been necessary.
One of the other rescue teams had found Cass.
My mind drifted toward her. Was she hurt? They’d said there were no fatalities, but that didn’t mean there hadn’t been serious injuries. The thought of it was enough to clear my mind of the problems I’d likely caused Lexi, and my thoughts shifted to worry.
Cass would be okay, I told myself.
She had to be. I wasn’t about to lose anybody else.
I’d known her for so long.
She was a part of my life, shitty as it was. The only decent part I could claim anymore.
I dozed off and on during the night, slumped on the couch and never really letting myself fully relax. It was because of this that I woke at the first sound coming from somewhere outside the cabin – it was a noise that didn’t belong. Years of living with my back to the wall, wary that death could come at any minute had sharpened my survival skills, and I was on my feet, immediately trying to place whatever had woken me.
It took a few more seconds for the noise to come again, and this time, I recognized it.
Somebody – or bodies – were approaching the cabin.
I glanced outside to see that it was past dawn, although still a little dim under the heavy growth of trees.
Although I knew it was likely the rescue team coming for Lexi, I waited at the window until I caught sight of the familiar, drab uniforms.
I turned to her and woke her up, glad I’d had her put on her clothes before going to sleep.
That was the last thing she needed, the harassment that could come if any of her co-workers realized what had been going on in here during the night hours.
She was sitting on the edge of the bed, her hair rumpled but eyes surprisingly alert given I’d just woken her from a sound sleep. She shoved a hand through her unkempt hair, attempting to tame it. It helped a little, but she still had that sexy, disheveled thing going on. I wanted to go to her and kiss her one last time, but even as I contemplated it, there was a hard knock on the door.
I heard the click sound of a lock, and in seconds, four other park rangers were inside the cabin.
One of them was the asshole from last night, and he gave me a sidelong look that he probably didn’t intend for me to see before focusing his attention on Lexi.
“Alex, you went and caused an awful lot of trouble,” he said, voice domineering. “What were you thinking, violating procedure like that?”
She lifted her head slowly and pinned a look on the man that would have made a wise man duck for cover. “Shove it, Stilwell,” she said in a cool voice.
“Stilwell, Lexi, we’ll discuss this once we’re out of here and Lexi has a chance to get her injuries evaluated,” a tall, broad man said as he moved to crouch in front of Lexi.
“Sir, I–”
“Stilwell, you heard me.”
The obnoxious ass fell silent, and I studied him from between narrowed eyes.
Stilwell.
Last night, I recalled thinking how Stilwell sounded like an asshole’s name. He’d done nothing but confirm my suspicion that he was, in fact, an asshole.
“Stilwell.” I crossed my arms over my chest and stared at him until he shifted his gaze my way. “Aren’t you the wise guy who told me that she could help me out and get me to the crash site?”
He sputtered for a moment, his jaw working up and down. “I never meant for her to bring you out here. You’re a civilian–”
“Let me quote something you said to me last night…” I cut him off, getting more and more pissed. This fuck-up was partly responsible for Lexi being out here. If he hadn’t pointed her – or anybody – out, I would have gone solo. “You said, ‘This guy says he’s the one who rented the plane that went down. He wants to join in with the search group. I told him you’d be the best bet to take him out to the crash site.’”
His eyes darted to the man kneeling in front of Lexi who had paused in the process of unwrapping her ankle. That man gave me an appraising look before focusing back on the job at hand. Guess he decided either it wasn’t worth trying to rebuke me…or he wanted to hear what I had to say.
“I hardly meant for Lexi to go off half-cocked with an untrained civilian–”
“I’m not a civilian,” I said, cutting him off again. “I’m an Army Ranger and can probably handle these woods and anything the weather can throw at me better than half you boys.”
Stilwell stiffened in insult, but before he could say anything else, I continued. “And if you didn’t intend for her to go off half-cocked, then why did you point her out to me in the first place and tell me, quoting again, ‘She’ll help you out. If you’re that determined to go out, maybe she can take you to the crash site.’” Memorizing details, down to the most minor ones was necessary for a Ranger, and my near-eidetic memory had come in handy more than once. I didn’t just remember things I’d seen, but things I’d heard, even years before. Giving Stilwell a sharp-edged smile, I added, “You also gave me her name, although the wrong one. Is any of this ringing any bells?”
Stilwell’s face had gone an ugly, mottled shade of red.
In a calm voice, the man who seemed to be in charge said, “Stilwell, why don’t you go outside and help get the basket ready?”
Stilwell didn’t reply, just turned on his heel and stormed out.
Lexi’s eyes drifted my way, and I managed to offer her a faint smile. She smiled back, and I thought I saw relief in her eyes.
The look was quickly gone as the man looked between the two of us, giving me an appraising look before focusing back on Lexi. “Pretty ugly sprain,” he said, taking her heel. “Let’s see how well you can move it.”
Lexi grimaced and let him gingerly prod and work at her ankle.
“I doubt anything’s broken,” he said finally. “You need to get an X-ray to make sure.”
“Yeah, I know.”
He shifted his attention to her wrist, and she curled her other hand around her injured arm. “You’re not messing with my wrist, Hawthorne. There’s some deformity so I can pretty much guarantee that it’s broken.”
The ranger, Hawthorne, nodded. “Well, I guess you went and paid the price for not following procedure.”
She scowled at him, and he shook his head.
A noise from the door had us all looking in that direction, and I watched as Stilwell and another ranger brought in a basket stretcher. I’d seen them before, back when I’d still been an active Army Ranger and had even had the unfortunate honor to be transported out in a similar contraption when I’d been injured in a hostile area.
The black metal contraption had a concave surface area that would cradle and protect Lexi as they transported her out of here, as well as straps to help secure her in place.
If we weren’t in such a heavily wooded area, they might have air-lifted her out, but the dense tree coverage made that impossible.
Lexi gave the basket a look of acute dislike, but she allowed Hawthorne to help her stand, supporting her on her injured side so she could use his body as a crutch and keep weight off her ankle.
Once she was on the stretcher, Hawthorne put the safety straps in place, then moved to the head. Stilwell started for the end of the stretcher, but one of the other rangers beat him to it.
“Stilwell; make sure the cabin is secure,” Hawthorne said as they carried Lexi out.
I didn’t trust the jackass to do a decent job of it, so I made sure the fire was out. That left him to collect the bag of trash left over from the night before. In that moment, I was glad I’d made sure to tie the
bag shut, sealing away evidence of the condom I used last night.
Stilwell gave me a sly look and glanced at the bed. “I guess you two ended up getting pretty cozy during the night, didn’t you? Alex is a hot piece of ass, so if things got a little heated, I can’t say I blame you.”
“Stilwell,” I said, shaking my head. He passed by me, and I shot out a hand, grabbing the stiff, upright collar of his winter coat. Jerking him close, I stared into his face, not bothering to hide the anger burning in me. “First…she goes by Lexi, not Alex. Second, if you even think about going off and running your mouth, I’m going to knock your teeth down your throat.”
Then, with a rough shove, I pushed him out of my face and headed out of the cabin.
They were still loading Lexi onto what looked like a rugged little golf cart with an extended bed designed for carrying equipment, or in this case, a patient.
Stilwell headed for the front of the vehicle, his face an angry red.
“I’m driving her back, Stilwell,” Hawthorne said, not even looking back at him. He gave me a quick look and jerked his head toward the cart. “You’ll be riding up front with me. Anders, you stay in the back with Lexi. The rest of you are hoofing it out of here.”
From the corner of my eye, I saw Stilwell’s face go ugly and mottled, but the expression faded fast, and he flashed his boss a quick smile. “You sure you want to try navigating the trail with the utility cart, boss? It’s been a while since you were out in the field.”
Hawthorne looked at Stilwell, and something in his eyes made me think he didn’t much care for the bastard either. They finished securing Lexi and the stretcher, and he hopped down out of the back of the cart with fluid agility. “I think I can handle it, son, but I appreciate the concern.”
He said it in such a way that the words came off in a polite, subtle rebuke.
I could tell by the look on Stilwell’s face he had heard it as well.
I strolled past the asshole and gave him a grim smile. “Have a nice walk back.”
Once they got Lexi back to the ranger station that had served as last night’s staging area, I asked what hospital Cass had been taken to.
