by Shey Stahl
This would change everything.
I was about to break the one rule I was told not to break.
The week after Christmas, Josh was out of town working on a project in Seattle. He’d be up there for the week and returning New Year’s Eve.
He didn’t invite me to go with him. But who was with them?
Addison.
“Do you want me to take you back?” Brevin asked hesitantly, his eyes searching mine for any indication that I wanted him to. He licked his lips slowly, his eyes hooded for the same reason I found myself panting beneath his stare. There it was—that spark between us that we couldn’t ignore. It didn’t matter how hard we tried. It was there and unavoidable. “We don’t have to do this.”
I made a decision.
I didn’t answer him. Instead, I put the helmet on and threw my leg over his bike. He shook his head, and started the bike. It rumbled to life, vibrating my body with the sound.
The slow need between us had been building, and we couldn’t deny it any longer. We both knew it. Something had to be done and I was making that move when Brevin stopped by the shop just before closing and I told him to take me back to his place.
The drive to his parents’ house was longer than I would have liked. I was afraid that if I had a moment to think about this, I wouldn’t go through with it, and I wanted to.
I wanted to like I needed to breathe.
Once inside the pool house, our shirts were being shed, both of us eager to get into it, a race to see who could get undressed faster. His head dipped to find my mouth, our tongues swirling together. I hadn’t realized it but this, right now, was our first kiss. There was no anticipation of our heads twisting and the tension building. It was only excitement and magic.
He felt different than Josh, or Jeb, or anyone else I’d ever kissed. It was like drinking salt water and knowing it would never quench your thirst. I felt every delicious texture and twist of his tongue with mine,
Pressing forward, his mouth kissed along my jaw until he found my neck and the spot right below my ear. “You are so fucking sexy right now.” He moaned, pressing forward more to show me how sexy he thought I was. “I can’t help but want you in every way possible.”
We kissed, slow and deep, but then, sometimes faster, sloppy-good kissing that I loved and felt like I hadn’t done since I was a teenager. Somewhere along the way when you get older, you realize how great everything past making out was, and rushed to the good stuff. I found comfort in not rushing and being like this.
We laughed when our teeth knocked together, but there was nothing funny about how he reacted to me. I didn’t feel like he was racing for the finish line now, like he just wanted to get off.
No, Brevin wasn’t making me feel that way. He was touching me like he was discovering me, taking in every curve and sensitive spot, making notes of the places I found the most erotic and squirmed for him.
His fingers traced the curve of my side until they were at the waistband of my jeans. We both stopped, just for a second. I was already aching. His mouth went to my ear and his fingers tracing the skin above my jeans making me shiver.
“Is this okay?” he whispered, his body tensing, eyebrows squeezed together.
I nodded, taking his hand, and we unbuttoned and then unzipped my jeans together. His breath became shorter, watching what we were doing. Logic and apprehension didn’t register then, didn’t want to register.
“I think you should just take these off,” he said, his heart thumping heavily against my back.
I laughed a little, looking over my shoulder. He was right there, smiling, sure of himself, and I took his bottom lip between mine just to taste before shimmying out of my jeans. Brevin helped, skimming one broad palm down the side of my thigh until I kicked them the rest of the way off.
“So fucking sexy ...” he trailed off, his voice thick.
Standing beside the bed, Brevin lowered the band of his shorts freeing his cock for me.
Wanting to taste him, I lowered to my knees taking his hardness between my palms. Running my hands from the base to the tip, I repeated the motions. Finally, I lowered my mouth to him.
Brevin groaned, the intensity in his eyes could only be described as raw hunger. He made a lot of noises, soft grunts and groans, with one hand tangled in my hair, guiding and encouraging me. All the talk, all the messages and wishing we could be together had led to this, something neither of us could slow down even if we wanted to.
My clit throbbed a sweet ache. I needed him.
He seemed to be on the same page when he stopped me, dragging my mouth from this cock and gently lying me down on the bed.
Brevin hovered over my slit and then pushed the head of his cock forward an inch. He looked down at me with this intensity, but his smile was playful. “You want my tongue on your pussy, Logan?”
“Yes.” I moaned, breath escaping in a whoosh when my lips parted.
“Yes what?” His eyes leveled with mine, tattered breathing making his chest shake, seeming to enjoy my struggle with controlling my composure. “Never be afraid to say what you want.”
“Yes, I want your tongue on my pussy.”
Moving down my body, his eyes closed and he breathed in. “Your pussy smells so good.”
Brevin and I both sighed when his tongue came in contact with my center. His tongue, wet and warm, was soft, and delicate to the touch. Almost tentative in nature, as if he was nervous maybe but still, there was more in the way he held me in place. As if to say he wouldn’t let me go now even if I had wanted him to.
He grabbed my hips tighter, his hands working with his tongue to send me over the edge, but what did it was the moan he let out at my reaction. Writhing in his hands, I screamed so loud my voice cracked and I was left with silent pleas.
When he drew back and stared down at me, I whimpered at the thought of his thick hard cock sliding inside my wet folds. My thighs immediately clenched in anticipation.
“You ready for me, baby?” he asked, crawling up my body. As soon as he shifted forward, I felt him against me, bare. I rocked against him.
I nodded, unable to hide my excitement. I needed him so badly.
It was then he remembered the condom and separated himself from me, the lack of heat from his body noticed immediately and my nipples hardened as I watched him. Tearing the plastic wrapper of the condom open, Brevin then took the condom between his thumb and forefinger and handed it to me. “Put it on with your mouth.”
“What?”
Sweeping the latex over my lips, his eyes were dark with need. “Put the condom on with your mouth.”
I wasn’t sure I understood what he was saying but I sat up and opened my mouth as he placed it inside on my tongue. “Make sure the tip is facing the back of your throat and then roll it on with your lips.”
Seemed easy enough.
So I did as he said, using my tongue to maneuver the condom to the head of his cock. Squeezing my lips together on his erection, I then drew him into my mouth, rolling the latex all the way to the base.
Brevin sighed, a small groan falling from his lips, hunching forward so his hands were on my ass, kneading and squeezing my cheeks. “So sexy.”
When I was finished, I sat up and waited for what he was going to do next. He blinked slowly, eyes so dark they looked black, like magical wishing wells you couldn’t see the bottom of but knew if you made a wish, it was coming true. Breathing in deeply, he watched me straddle him as I made the first move.
“Look at me.” His fingers brushed over heated freckled skin. “Do you want me to stop? It’s not too late.”
Panic rushed through me at the thought. “No!”
That was the last time he asked.
“Slide down my cock, nice and slow, baby.” He kneaded my chest with delicious roughness and held me captive with the intensity of his gaze and those black eyes.
How could someone’s eyes be so dark and mysterious, but so sensitive at the same time. The eyes that slowly complica
ted my life without knowing it.
“I want to watch your pussy devour every inch.”
As slowly as I could, my legs and arms shaking with both anticipation of what this would feel like, and our reactions, I slid down on him, down every single thick inch. It took me a second to adjust, but when I did, relief ran through me immediately, rising up from my center to warm my cheeks. The buildup, touching to grabbing, soft and hesitant to passionate and persistent, was intense and left me with a rush of emotions that finally surfaced, leaving me gasping at the surface for a breath of air only he could give right then.
“Fuck…”A low rumble left his chest and pressed into my skin.
In response, a shudder ran through me along with raw power knowing I made him feel this way.
Cursing under his breath, he took a firm hold on me, fingers digging into my heated flesh. I felt like two people right then, one so calm that nothing could shake me out of the trance. The other, lightning spreading through me, shocking every nerve ending, sending signals and reactions from a frantic touch to a hungry kiss, desperate to cure the hunger within.
“Don’t stop.” He slammed me down into every movement, refusing to allow an inch of space between us. His hands clutched my hips, rocking me back and forth, a trembling present in his body with every move. “Do you feel how much I want you? How badly I’ve wanted this from the moment I saw you in that shop with frosting on your fingers?”
I nodded, unsure what else to do when he thrust up into my movements, slow and cautious as I stretched around him.
Any fear I had over this vanished right then, as if it never really existed in the first place.
Nothing was enough.
No movement was enough.
It was more.
It was everything.
We moved from position to position, our bodies speaking when our lips wouldn’t. I wasn’t surprised when we didn’t say much of anything.
On my stomach, his chest pressed to my back, his hand moving to my center, pressed between me and the mattress. Wedging between my legs, I closed my eyes at the sensation of his weight on me. Oh, God, how I dreamed of feeling this weight, his smell, his closeness.
“Come for me again,” he growled in a begging plea. “I need to feel your wet pussy all over my fingers. And then I’m going to make you lick it off.”
His finger made a pass over my aching clit and my body jumped, the feeling too intense, but I wanted another one. I wanted more with him.
He slowed his pace and I wanted to die. He was leaving me hanging, just on the edge.
“No…” I pleaded, my legs straightening out.
“Trust me,” he whispered, hands moving to my ass. With both hands there, he could go deeper, harder, hit the very nerves I never thought was possible and bring me to a brand new level of desire.
Relentlessly, he claimed me with measured strokes, knowing how to draw this out. “The longer you deny yourself the release, the better it’s going to be, baby.”
Even with my body welded to his, sweat pouring from the two of us, hands slipping and sweet kissing, it still wasn’t close enough. I wanted to crawl inside him and feel every moment, every sensation he did.
And he was right. The release was intense and stirred needs inside me I didn’t know existed. How could it be every time it was different? With Josh it was different. With Brevin, it was different. My chest actually hurt when he touched me because of the way my heart trembled in response.
With a quick movement, he had me on my back again.
My head snapped back against his headboard, his hips creating enough force to move my entire body up the mattress. His hot breath fanned over me in time with his forceful strokes that were slowly killing me with unbridled desire. Sensation filled me again and again.
Brevin’s left hand was on the headboard, his knuckles blanching. His head fell forward, resting against my forehead, tender forced grunts falling from his sweet lips. His sweaty chest slid across my own, and the moan that left my lips shook the both of us.
“God, Logan…” He breathed against my skin, his tongue sliding over my salty sheen. “You’re so fucking beautiful. It’s too much.”
I knew what he meant. Every shift of his hips was the driving force I needed, the cure and the curse all in one.
Sex had never been like this.
Maybe it was the long buildup between the two of us, the anticipation, the obsession we’d developed. I didn’t know what it was but from the moment he entered me, I felt the draw, the connection. Our bodies welded together and seemed made to stay there.
Both of us moved frantic; moaning and grunting, fisting sheets between fingers and gripping the headboard. We couldn’t slow down. Maybe round two, we’d have more time. But this, this was all about the need.
My release was there before I could stop it, his iron hard cock slamming relentlessly into me, his pubic bone at the right angle, the right touch, the right everything.
I rode out my high, bliss pulsing through my veins like a volcano flowing hot lava. Rolling my hips into his movements, I let him take me higher and higher until I thought he’d take me away forever.
“Fuck, I’m going to come.” He grunted, pulling on my hair, arching my neck back. I rushed to find his eyes.
I wanted so badly to witness the fall, the way he shuddered and groaned. I needed to see that.
And when I did, it was worth it.
His long legs tensed, spreading my thighs a little more, his stomach muscles flexing as he pulsed into me, steady, panting breaths capturing my own broken ones. A grunt forced its way from his lips, and then a groan, his mouth moving to my collarbone where he bit down, crying out over his release.
Just as his hand slipped from the headboard and hit the pillow beside me with force, the wood cracked.
Looking up, I saw the splintered wood and laughed as he rolled off me. “You broke your headboard.”
Glancing up, he smiled, his eyes hesitantly met mine, and then he shook his head.
“You broke me,” he said, panting against my shoulder as he flipped over to flop his arm over my stomach. “You fucking broke me.”
I smiled when he kissed my neck again and took a firm hold on me, moving me so I was on top of him. His eyes were still hooded, and I knew then we were going for more.
HIS HAND FOUND mine in the darkness, fingers barely brushing but my body recognized his touch. Curling into him, I placed my head in the crook of his arm and relaxed. I was about to spend the night with him and not go home to an empty house. I wouldn’t go home, and I wouldn’t explain.
In an attempt to ease my nerves, because he knew I had them, Brevin’s head twisted, lips pressing gently to my forehead. “We didn’t do anything wrong. He did. He should have never given you the chance to think you wanted more.”
Even with my relaxed state, a rush of fear pricked my skin thinking of how that statement made me feel. My heart raced, hammering so hard it hurt, and my throat tightened as though I would vomit any minute. Though nothing about this made me feel sick.
If anything, it felt right. He made my head throb.
Taking his hand, I rested it in both of mine, exploring every detail behind the talent his hands held. Long fingers, muscular hands with calloused edges, he held a lot in those hands. And I couldn’t help but wonder if my heart was there too.
“Have you ever heard the story of the blue water lily?” He exhaled and inhaled again, drawing in a breath with his face buried in my hair.
“No.”
With his lips remaining on my skin, just below my ear, his hand splayed over my stomach tracing circles. “There’s this theory, or belief in Egypt of a deeper meaning than a flower blossoming in water. They believed the flower came from waters of chaos. Until one day, the flower emerged from the darkness and revealed a young god sitting on its golden heart. They believed that flower was the Creator, the sun god, the source of light. At the end of the day, as darkness took over, the lily closed its petals. And each morni
ng, it greeted the sun, an imitation of the sky and the sun.” His voice lowered, his breathing lighter as he felt the beating of my heart under his touch. “They believe that we too have the ability to bloom from waters of chaos and give light to the world.”
My chest constricted, my heart, my thoughts, my breath seizing at his words.
Now I knew what laid beyond the darkness of his eyes.
Beauty.
The kind of beauty a flower would blossom to see.
The once blue sky was splattered with purple and pink across the horizon, an ending to another day. My mind was just as muddled, thoughts, apprehensions…so much I didn’t understand where one ended and another began.
“They believe that we too have the ability to bloom from waters of chaos and give light to the world.”
Brevin consumed me. Our time spent together filling every sinful and stray thought to the point where I had nothing else left.
Johnny Depp once said, ‘If you love two people at the same time, chose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn’t have fallen for the second.’
That Johnny Depp, he was a smart guy.
Brevin had me looking at my life and what I was doing from another angle.
“I don’t know what to do,” I told Brevin as we walked along the boardwalk after I closed up the shop. The air was crisp, winter winds slapping at my face. I squinted, attempting to conceal my thoughts.
Brevin seemed different tonight. Tension rising in his rigid posture, trying hard to keep the worry hidden from the calm countenance he was handing me.
I waited for him to say something but his jaw only twitched.
He was quiet, his breathing light as the air. Twisting, I looked over at him and stopped walking near the water. His hands went to the railing, grasping the worn wood tightly.
He wanted me to leave Josh and be with him.
He’d asked me repeatedly over the last few days.
Choose me.
Leave him.
Love us.
“You know, I don’t understand you. You message me and wanted to hook up. We did. And now you are trying to act like I’m the one who pursued this and got us into this fucking mess,” he said matter-of-factly, but sadness lurked in his words and his eyes.
