by Bethany-Kris
Tommas knew what the price was.
The boss’s seat.
Glancing at his lover across the table, Tommas noted Abriella wasn’t touching her food. She had her hands in her lap, and her stare stayed stuck firmly on the same place. He could tell by the thin set of her lips and the tightness in her jaw that she was unsettled and confused.
He didn’t blame her.
Tommas wished he could soothe her worries.
All for you, Ella, his mind whispered. All for you.
Forcing himself to look away from Abriella was harder than Tommas expected. He pushed the potatoes around on his plate, trying to settle the way his thoughts and heart warred. His head wanted one thing while his heart wanted another.
He wasn’t sure which was right.
“I’m waiting,” Joel said.
Tommas cleared his throat, needing to get back into the right mindset for the dinner. “Sorry, I’m distracted lately. It’s been a difficult couple of weeks.”
“Oh?”
Damian passed his cousin a curious look, asking a million questions without even saying a word. Tommas didn’t have a single answer for his cousin.
“Yes,” Tommas said to Joel, smiling slightly. “But nothing I can’t handle.”
“I’m waiting to hear your offer,” Joel replied.
Was it the right one?
Tommas didn’t know.
“You can take it,” Tommas said quietly. “The boss’s seat, the Outfit, and the claim. Take it, Joel. I don’t want to fight for it anymore. I’m done.”
Abriella’s head snapped up at Tommas’ statement. Her blue eyes burned into his, a disbelief and anger darkening her irises.
No.
He could practically hear her screaming it inside her head.
No. No. No.
Tommas gave his girl a lopsided smirk, wanting to reassure her that everything was perfectly fine. To anyone else, it probably seemed like an afterthought to his statement about giving Joel the seat. Abriella would know better.
He hoped so, anyway.
“Tommas?” Damian said, two seats away from Abriella.
Tommas met his cousin’s gaze. “This is the best choice, D.”
Damian didn’t look like he believed that at all. “Are you—”
“Before you ask, yes, I am sure.”
“Okay,” Damian murmured.
“I like that offer,” Joel finally said, approval thickening his voice. “However, offers usually come with a clause, Tommas. What it is that you want in all of this?”
The only thing Tommas had ever wanted.
He was only now beginning to realize that to get what he wanted, to get Abriella, he was going to have to give up something else.
“A guarantee,” Tommas said.
“Of what?” Joel asked.
“My position. Nothing more.”
Joel sucked in air through his teeth, and leaned back in his chair. “Why are you giving up, Tommas?”
“Because I have nothing left to lose.”
“I haven’t taken very much from you, old friend. I would say you’ve taken far more from me, actually.”
Joel had no idea what he had taken from Tommas, but she was sitting just across the table with wetness shimmering along her bottom lashes and her teeth cutting into her bottom lip. Everything that was anything to Tommas Rossi was three feet away with her heart bleeding and her soul crying.
Tommas had done that.
He simply wanted to fix it.
“I’m tired,” Tommas admitted, shrugging. “I don’t want to do it anymore, Joel. What else do you need to know?”
Joel clasped his hands over his midsection. “A guarantee, you said.”
“Yes.”
“Like what, Tommas?”
Tommas smiled. “Like a marriage. There’s no better way to cement loyalties, offer forgiveness, wipe slates, and apologize in this life than a marriage, Joel.”
“Between you and who else?” Joel asked quietly.
“You know who,” Tommas said. “I wanted her to be here for a reason. Your sister. I want a marriage to your sister as a guarantee for what I’m giving you, and nothing more.”
Abriella sucked in a hard breath. The sound echoed in the near silent dining room. It felt laced with pain, rage, and disbelief all rolled into one. Tommas had all he could do not to look at his lover again.
He was doing this for her.
Didn’t she understand?
“It’s certainly an interesting offer to—”
Joel’s words were cut off by the screech of chair legs against tile. Abriella stood from her chair with her hands clenched into tight fists at her sides.
“No,” she whispered. “Absolutely not.”
Joel cocked a brow as he regarded his sister. “I beg your pardon, Abriella? This isn’t your choice to make. Sit down.”
Tommas swallowed the lump forming in his throat that threatened to keep him quiet. “Please sit, Abriella.”
She didn’t. Her gaze never moved from Tommas, either.
“I won’t marry him like that,” Abriella said “I won’t marry him at all for those reasons.”
The pain her words caused was the harshest kind of pain. It was the kind of agony that you didn’t immediately feel ripping into your nervous system, but instead, the shock of the immediate injury left you numb all over and unable to think, move, or react. Then, when the numbness subsided and you could finally feel again, the pain was immeasurable.
Unbearable.
Tommas hid his well.
Somehow.
“Abriella!” Joel snarled. “Sit down!”
“Not like that,” Abriella repeated, still looking at Tommas.
His pain ebbed away.
Not like that.
She wouldn’t do it like this.
He heard her unspoken words.
Tommas finally took a real breath.
Abriella glanced to the side, her gaze cutting into her brother. “I won’t do it.”
With those words, she stepped aside, slammed the chair into the table, and left the room without a single glance back. Joel spluttered to come up with a response.
Tommas found Damian staring at him, waiting for something—anything.
Slowly, Tommas stood from his seat. “We’ll go.”
Damian followed his cousin’s lead, standing and pushing his chair in without a word.
“She’ll do as I tell her to,” Joel said.
Tommas shook his head, knowing Abriella far better than her fool of a brother did. “I won’t force her down the aisle to meet me.”
Joel’s gaze narrowed, but the man said nothing.
Tommas didn’t mind. “Damian?”
“Yeah?”
“I think this dinner is over. Let’s go.”
Damian nodded. “Whatever you want, Tommy.”
“Your offer is still on the table, isn’t it?” Joel asked.
Tommas looked at Joel, cold and numb inside.
He didn’t answer.
But frankly, Tommas didn’t have to.
“Boss?”
Tommas’ attention on the buildings passing the car by as it sped through the city was enough to lull him into a daze. It was one of the things he hated the most about being in the backseat of a car while someone chauffeured him around. Boredom found him far too easily. Add in the fact that Tommas had gotten his new Mercedes to replace the old one, and couldn’t sit in the front like he preferred, and his annoyance jumped higher.
“Boss?”
“What, Nate?” Tommas asked.
“The streets are quiet,” the enforcer noted.
“Is that a problem?”
“No. I was just making an observation. You’re awfully quiet lately, too.”
Tommas sighed, rubbing at his right temple with two fingers. “You know I’m not angry with you, right?”
Nate swallowed audibly. “Yeah, boss, I know.”
“You did what I told you to, Nate. There’s nothing else
to say. Stop trying to fill the silence and pick my brain to find out if there’s something I’m not saying to you. It’s done, man. It happened. You did your job.”
“And fucked it up at the same time.”
“Yeah, well—”
Tommas’ words were interrupted by the ring of his phone. He recognized the unfamiliar tune instantly. It was only unfamiliar because he’d changed the tune for the phone number, and that number hadn’t called his very damned much.
Abriella.
He hadn’t seen her since the dinner two evenings ago.
Tommas pulled his phone out and pressed the device to his ear. “Ella?”
“Tommy?”
His relief felt as good as sex and damn near like being high.
He’d waited for her call.
Wanted it.
His fingers itched just hearing her voice.
Fuck, why was he so goddamn crazy like this?
What was it about Abriella that made Tommas so insane?
“Yeah, baby,” Tommas said, “it’s me. Who else?”
Abriella’s laugh was quiet, strained, and broken at the end. The sound tore into him, promising to hurt and feel damn good at the same time. “Where are you?”
“Just driving. Nothing important.”
“I’m at school.”
“Okay.”
“How far are you from the college?” she asked.
Tommas’ heart clenched at her whispered question. “About twenty minutes. Why?”
“Darryl had an appointment during my third and fourth period class. It’s a two-hour class, no break. Maybe he thought it would be safe and I wouldn’t know. I’m not sure, but I heard him telling Joel about it this morning. I left the class knowing he wasn’t outside watching for me. Tommy?”
“What, Ella?”
“I really need you.”
Tommas’ fingers dug into his thigh through his dress pants hard enough to hurt. “Why? What’s wrong?”
“I just …”
“Ella, tell me.”
“I’m not okay,” she said, a sadness coating her every word. “I’ve tried to be okay, and I pretended for a long time. I just wanted to feel like I was in control, because everybody else needed to hurt and I had to be strong. I can’t do it anymore. Please come get me. I’m at the west wing exit. I need to breathe for a while.”
Tommas didn’t even question her.
He understood.
Christ.
Of course, he did.
His lungs were finally taking in air again simply because she called.
Tommas barely had time to swing the back door open and Abriella was tumbling into the seat on top of him. Her messenger bag fell on the floor of the car as the door slammed shut. She seemed to forget all about her bag the moment she had Tommas in her sights.
Something was wrong with his girl.
Her gaze was pained.
Tears dampened her lashes.
A tiredness edged around her eyes.
Tommas’ air was knocked from the lungs when Abriella’s arms found his middle and hugged tight. Her embrace was strong enough to hurt, but he reveled in the ache. He held her tight, too, wrapping one arm around her back while his free hand tangled into her hair and rooted her against his form.
She trembled all over.
Her breaths stuttered.
Quiet, breathless sobs slipped from her lips while her shoulders heaved. Abriella buried her face into his chest, he felt her teeth clench, and the wetness of her tears soaked into his dress shirt.
“Shhh,” Tommas said, murmuring the words into Abriella’s sweet-smelling hair. “Whatever it is, it’s okay. I got you, Ella.”
She nodded, but her soft crying continued. It cut him to the fucking core, making him bleed on the inside where no one else could see. This woman shouldn’t cry—not with him.
“Boss?” Nate asked from the front.
Tommas sucked in a deep gulp of air, remembering who else was in the car with them. “Drive, Nate.”
“To where?”
“Anywhere. Just drive. I’ll tell you when to stop.”
“All right, boss.”
Abriella’s crying eventually turned into painful, gasping sobs as the car sped through quiet streets. Tommas barely recognized the buildings passing them by as he was far too focused on wiping the streaks of tears from his lover’s face.
“Ella, talk to me,” he demanded gently.
“My mom,” she managed to say.
Tommas flinched, remembering her words from the earlier phone call. She had to be strong, she’d said. Everyone else wasn’t. He’d seen her at the funeral, hiding her pain and seemingly more distant than ever in her blue eyes.
Did she think her grief didn’t matter?
Were her tears held at bay for others to cry instead?
“Oh, baby, I’m sorry.”
Abriella shook her head, hid her face from his view, and curled into his embrace until her legs were tucked to her chest and he was cradling her in the back seat. Tommas didn’t mind. Not at all.
“I just want to breathe, Tommas,” Abriella mumbled. “Please let me breathe.”
“Whatever you need, babe.”
“Tighter.”
“What?”
“Hold me tighter. I keep feeling like I’m going to break apart. Don’t let me do that.”
“I got you,” he told her, kissing her forehead.
“Who else does?” she asked.
No one.
“You could have called me long before this, Ella,” Tommas said.
“I couldn’t. If I did, I would have broken all apart. I couldn’t, Tommy.”
Sometimes, his lover was strange with her ways. Control was something she tried to maintain at all costs. Tommas understood because he was the same way. How could he judge her for what she needed? He couldn’t.
“Okay, baby.”
Abriella moved her face enough that she could look up at him. “Would you have done it?”
“Done what?”
“Joel, the offer … would you?”
Tommas’ arm tightened around Abriella’s back. “Had you not said no, then yes, I would have done it.”
“Why?”
“For you, Ella. I thought I didn’t have a choice. I was trying to make a new one.”
“He can’t have it, Tommy. Joel can’t win.”
Yeah, Tommas knew that, too.
“Nate,” Tommas said, willing the thickness out of his voice.
“Yeah, boss?”
“Not too far. Somewhere private enough that we won’t be bothered. Then take a walk.”
“Got it.”
“When do you need to be back?” Tommas asked.
“Not important.”
“It is. I don’t want you having more trouble to manage alone. When?”
“A little more than an hour.”
It wasn’t much time.
Tommas would take it.
Abriella’s back rested against Tommas’ chest. After his enforcer had found a quiet parking lot, parked the car into a back corner, and left the vehicle, Abriella had made herself a comfortable spot lying with Tommas. His back was to the door as his fingers played with the strands of her silky hair. He went back and forth between running his fingers through her waves and stroking the soft skin of her neck.
The simple touches seemed to calm his lover, so he kept it up.
Abriella fingered the sleeves of her sweater as she asked, “What were you supposed to be doing today?”
“Nothing more important than this, sweet girl.”
“I’m sure.”
Tommas chuckled. “I had some money to collect from Damian, a dinner to go to with Adriano, and then I needed to drive my mother to her AA meeting.”
Abriella stilled. “Your mom is going to AA?”
“It’s a recent development. I found her in my house the other night when I got home. She blurted out that she’d been thinking about it for a while and wanted to talk to me. I ov
erlooked the fact she used her emergency key to get in.”
“Oh. Do you think it will last?”
“No.”
Abriella tilted her head up enough for Tommas to see her frown. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. It is what it is.”
“It’s more than she’s done before, Tommy.”
That was true enough.
“Yes, but Serena does nothing without a reason. Usually that falls in line with her manipulation like it always does. None of that matters, Ella. Just you today, huh?”
“Okay.” Abriella sighed as Tommas’ fingers stroked her cheek. “I was so angry with you.”
“I know you were.”
“But I was angrier at Joel,” she whispered. “And I knew that it was a mistake; I knew you tried to stop it all, Tommy.”
Tommas pressed his lips to Abriella’s temple. “Yeah.”
“But I still couldn’t breathe. I didn’t want my father or brother to see me break down, and I didn’t want Joel to know how much it hurt me. I couldn’t do it anymore. I was so close to just skipping out for a day, even if it would get me into shit. I wanted you. After the dinner the other night, I thought …”
“Tell me.”
“I thought that you were ready to give up, and that you didn’t care.”
“Ella,” Tommas said, her name coming out like a growl. “Don’t ever think that. There is no soul on this earth that matters more to me than yours does. You are every part of me that is good. Every single part. I did that for—”
“Me,” she interrupted softly. “I figured that out, but I still couldn’t let you do it.”
“I’ll figure something out.”
“Please don’t make anyone else bury someone they love, Tommy.”
Tommas kissed Abriella’s temple again. “I won’t, baby.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“Don’t stop,” Abriella whispered when Tommas’ fingers stopped their travels through her hair. She’d been enjoying his attention. It wasn’t nearly often enough that she had his love and time on only her. When she did, Abriella felt like the queen of his world. “Keep going, Tommy. Please.”
Tommas chuckled, the movement rocking them both. “I thought you always said that whenever I touched you, you couldn’t think and you went stupid.”
“I do.”
“Well?”
“That’s what I want right now. Not to think. To be stupid over you. Please?”
