by Zoë Archer
“Who’s your CO, Si?” She surprised him with the gently voiced question about his commanding officer. His thoughts had drifted so far, he almost jumped when her question brought him back to Earth, but his training held him in check.
“I’m a civilian now, Mari.”
She looked at him in surprise as she finished with the last of his stitches. “A contractor? Don’t tell me you’re working for those black ops guys in the swamp.”
He should have known she would jump to the right conclusion. She had a quick mind and a wide knowledge of military and political things one wouldn’t necessarily expect of a medical doctor.
“You know I can’t tell you, Mari. Everything about my presence here is on a need to know basis.”
“Well, right now I need to know who to report your injury to. You must have a CO on base.”
She was right, but he didn’t really want her any more involved than she already was. “Give me the phone and I’ll report in.”
She stared at him for a moment, probably deciding whether to argue, then finally turned toward the wall phone, snatching up the handset. She handed it to him and he sent a pointed look at the two nurses, who were busy with various tasks in the small space.
“Oh, for heaven’s sake,” she grumbled, sending the two ladies on their way, giving them errands to run in other parts of the infirmary. It wasn’t truly private, of course. Still, it was good enough for him to report his location and condition. He wouldn’t get into any incriminating details of his mission while on a public phone line anyway. Mariana turned back to him as the other two women bustled off. “What number?”
He couldn’t reach the wall mounted keypad from where he sat. He would rather she didn’t know who he called, but there was no other choice. He gave her the commander’s extension number and a raised eyebrow was her only response. She dialed for him, then turned to leave the enclosure, giving him the illusion of privacy.
Soon after he ended the call, Mari returned, taking the handset and hanging it up for him. He had no doubt she had heard every word of his brief conversation, but no comments on the call were forthcoming. She didn’t speak at all, in fact, as she continued to monitor his vital signs and work on the less severe of his wounds. She had taken care of the most serious first. All that were left were a few shallow scratches and bruises.
The silent treatment was driving him nuts. He knew he owed her an apology at the very least, for the way he had ended their relationship. He had never been the most eloquent of men and still didn’t know how to make her understand his reasoning, all these years later. A bare bones apology would have to do. It was a good place to start anyway.
“I’m sorry, Mari.” The words spilled out as she bent near, tending a smaller slash on his upper chest, just below the collar bone. Her startled gaze flew upward to meet his. He had her attention, he only wished he knew what to say to make things right. “I’m sorry for not saying good-bye. I should have made a clean break rather than leave you hanging.”
“Why did you?” The echoes of remembered pain in her unguarded expression sent a wave of sorrow through his heart. He had hurt her worse than he’d thought.
Simon sighed. “It wasn’t anything you did, sweetheart. I just…I thought it was best to end things. I guess I hoped you would move on as soon as I shipped out.”
Silence met his statement and he saw anger begin to simmer in her expression. “I waited for you, Simon. When you said you had to go, I thought you’d be back after your mission ended. Remember how I didn’t ask any questions about where you were going or when you’d be back? I knew better than to ask, but then when you didn’t return, I thought maybe you’d taken my silence as lack of interest.”
Oh, he’d known she was interested. It had nearly killed him to leave her, but he hadn’t seen any other choice at the time. Not after he’d recovered from that last mission. Everything had changed too much by then. He could never go back. Not then and not now.
“I’m sorry.” It was too little, too late. The apology was all he had to offer and he knew it wasn’t enough.
She turned away. “Yeah, me, too. Sorry I ever met you.” Her words were pitched low, but he heard them…and felt them, like a knife to his gut.
He didn’t know what he would have said in reply because at that moment the curtain of his cubicle was swept summarily aside and a Navy commander swept in. Not just any Navy commander, this man was an old friend and the commander he had been tasked to work under on his current mission.
“Where are your weapons, Si?” Commander Matthew Sykes didn’t pull his punches. He was a man on a mission and all business while danger was a possibility. And they both knew Simon’s weapons were more than run of the mill and highly classified. That was precisely why he hadn’t brought them inside the clinic.
“Stashed in the bushes outside the good doctor’s office window.” Simon nodded toward Mariana, one raised eyebrow making Matt aware of her presence and the need to be circumspect in front of her.
Matt snapped a look at his aide who had followed close behind, and the young seaman scurried off to secure the top secret darts. The creatures Simon was hunting could only be destroyed by a special, super strong toxin, and it was kept under lock and key except when he was in the field.
“Sorry for the intrusion, Doctor,” Matt spoke to Mariana for the first time, and Simon didn’t like the interest in his old buddy’s expression.
“No problem, sir.”
“How is he?” Matt asked Mariana about his status rather than talk to Simon directly, which annoyed him to no end. He had spent too many weeks being talked over by medical personnel to have any patience with it now.
“He lost a lot of blood and required a few stitches. His prognosis is good. I believe he’ll be good as new in a few days. I’d like him to go to the base hospital for observation. He may still need a transfusion, though he’s responding well.”
“No hospital,” Simon said quickly. Matt, thankfully, agreed with him.
“Only if it’s absolutely necessary, Doctor. I’d prefer to keep this quiet. In fact, I’d prefer you didn’t discuss his treatment with anyone else, and make no record of his visit to your clinic, if possible. His position here on base is—”
“Classified.” Mariana dared to cut off the superior officer, a bored expression on her face. “I understand, sir. Simon and I know each other from his spec op days. He told me he’s a civilian now and I can extrapolate from that.”
Matt’s eyes narrowed. “Then you understand his presence here is on a need to know basis.”
“And I don’t need to know. Got it, sir. I’ll keep him here and observe him myself, then send him on his way if there are no complications.”
Again Matt watched her, an uncertain expression on his face. They had been friends too long for Simon not to realize Matt was intrigued by her.
“I’d like a verbal report on his condition this evening, Doctor. Call my office and speak to no one except me. Understood?”
“Yes, sir.”
“And Simon, I want you to stay here as long as necessary. I’ll have Johnson bring over your kit before dark, just in case. In the meantime, get some rest.”
“Sure thing, Matt.” They’d been friends too long for Simon to be awed by Matt’s rank. If Simon had stayed in the service, no doubt they would be equals at this point, having come up together through the ranks.
The commander left without further ado and Simon was left with Mariana once more.
“Want to tell me what that was all about?” A raised eyebrow dared him.
“Honey, you know I can’t.” The easy smile on her face said she was just teasing him and the idea that she would deal so easily when confronted by the very real secrecy he had to live with was surprising. He wouldn’t have thought she’d take it so well.
“Fair enough. How are you feeling? Still light-headed?”
“I never said I was light-headed.”
“You didn’t have to say it, Simon. You were pale
as a sheet when you wobbled onto that table. If you can walk, I have a more comfortable berth for you in back. You can catch some sleep and I’ll check on you during the day to be sure you’re bouncing back the way I expect. Sound good?”
“I’ve slept on some pretty hard ground over the years. Still, I wouldn’t turn down a soft mattress if one is available.” He levered himself upward with her assistance. He was still a touch dizzy, but he wouldn’t let that stop him. She held his arm and his other hand went to the rolling IV pole as she guided him down the short corridor to a back room.
“We use this cot when we need to work late or do double shifts when there are large numbers of men in the field. It doesn’t happen often, but it’s there if we need it and right now, I think you need it most. Nobody will disturb you back here. The head is just down the hall. You should probably wait for one of us to assist you before you decide to walk any distances. Just in case.”
“You’ll have to tell your nurses not to discuss my presence. My mission is top secret, Mari.”
He stopped just inside the door to gaze down at her. She was a head shorter than him but somehow they’d always managed to fit together like matching jigsaw pieces. When they’d made love, the experience had been transformational. Transcendent, even. Like nothing he had ever experienced before, and probably would never experience again.
“I’ll take care of it. Don’t worry. Margaret and Nancy are trustworthy. These days, medical professionals are held to a very high standard of patient privacy. Your treatment falls under that category.”
He nodded, unable to look away from her beautiful face. The moment stretched. He had one hand on the IV pole and his uninjured arm resting on her shoulder. It took very little effort to pull her unresisting body closer, until they were only a breath apart.
God, how he’d missed the feel of her, the touch and scent of her. He needed…just one taste. That’s all. One taste to hold against the future without her. Simon dipped his head, her lips so close to his own.
And then he kissed her. He did the thing he had promised himself he would never do again. He kissed her, getting lost in the magic of her, her soft sighs, her delicate flavor, her luscious curves that fit so tightly against him.
For a moment, time stopped. She was in his arms and all was right with his world—for just a second out of time. Then reality came crashing back as voices came down the hall. More staff arriving for their shift made a racket as they sought their desks, just beyond the wall that separated this back room from the rest of the small infirmary.
Mariana drew back, out of his arms, and he had to let her go. He hated to do it, but he knew damned well he had overstepped. The condemnation he feared he would see on her face would undo him. Instead of anger, he read the same startled deer-in-the-headlight response he was feeling. She would get mad later, he supposed, but for now, she was just as affected by their kiss as he was.
They’d never lacked chemistry. They’d had that going for them, at least. Still, there was too much else wrong with the relationship—with him—for there to be any possibility of a future together. Simon knew he would die a single man. No way would he subject any woman to the uncertainty that loomed in his future.
Mariana backed away from Simon, shocked nearly senseless by his kiss. It had always been that way with him. Explosive, almost mindless passion that sent her to the moon and back with nearly instantaneous motion. God, that man could kiss. And make love. She had dreamed about his lovemaking in the years since they’d parted.
He’d hurt her by leaving without a word and she didn’t know if she could ever forgive him. By his actions and words, she didn’t even know if he wanted to be forgiven. She didn’t know what this kiss was all about. Was it impulse? Or was it some deeper overture? Did he want to get back together? Or did he merely want to tease her again, work her up into a frenzy of need, want, and desire, only to leave her without a backward glance again?
The bastard.
He had disappeared once. He would do it again in a heartbeat. She knew that like she knew the back of her hand. He was a spec ops soldier, now a civilian contractor, which was a polite term for a soldier of fortune. A good, old-fashioned mercenary. Likely he was even worse now about commitment than he had been when he’d still been officially employed by Uncle Sam.
She needed to be wary. And she needed to stay away from him. No more kisses. No more tantalizing glimpses into what could have been…if only he’d returned to her.
This wasn’t a return. It was a matter of coincidence that he needed medical help and she was the nearest doctor. If not for his injury, she suspected he never would have revealed his presence. He had probably done all he could to avoid running into her.
“How long have you been here at Quantico, Simon?”
He stepped back farther, in clear retreat. “About four months.”
She should have known. Mariana just looked at him for a long moment, shaking her head as she mentally called herself all kinds of fool.
“Well.” She had to get out of this room and he needed to lay down before he fell down. She took charge of his rolling IV stand and ushered him into the bed. It wasn’t grand. More of a cot, really. But it would do. She arranged his arm and helped him find a comfortable position, tucking a sheet over his legs and up to his waist. He could tug it higher if he was cold. The infirmary was usually a little warmer than most of the other offices on base. “I’ll check on you every half hour until I’m sure you’re out of the woods. Try to sleep. If you need anything, just call. My office is next door. I’ll hear you.”
He grabbed her hand before she could bolt for the door.
“I won’t apologize for kissing you, Mari. I will admit I was wrong to do it, though. I won’t touch you again. Okay?”
He seemed to be seeking absolution. It was the least she could do for him so he would rest easy. And if he kept his word and didn’t throw her into a tizzy again, it’d be worth it. He was too dangerous to her peace of mind.
“Okay. Get some rest, Si. I’ll be back in a bit to see how you’re doing.”
Chapter Two
Simon’s eyes snapped open the moment she walked into the room about twenty-five minutes later. He had always been a light sleeper. Spec ops guys trained for that sort of thing.
“Feeling any better?” She kept her voice deliberately low, in deference to his awakening senses. She also didn’t want any of the other clinic workers to realize he was back here, per the commander’s orders.
“Much better, thanks. You don’t need to check on me. All I need now is sleep and I’ll be fine.”
She gave him a teasing smile as she advanced into the room. “Oh, I guess I thought I was the doctor here. Just let me take a quick look at your stitches and I’ll leave you to sleep.”
She reached for the edge of his bandages, but he caught her wrist in a firm grip, shocking her gaze upward to meet his.
“I’m fine, Mari. Seriously.”
“Well, seriously, Si. I need to check your condition. By rights, I should’ve sent you to the hospital for observation at the very least.” He stared her down, apparently unwilling to let go of her hand. She recognized a brick wall when she met one. Mariana sighed and relaxed her stance. “Come on, Simon. You know you can trust me. What’s up with you? Why won’t you let me take care of you?”
“You already did, Mari.” His whispered words reach right into her heart. “And I do trust you. It’s why I came here last night instead of heading for the base hospital. I knew you’d patch me up and not ask too many questions.”
“Oh, so that’s your angle.” She gave him a cunning smile as she perched on the side of his cot. “Buttering me up won’t make me drop the subject. I will check your stitches and I will read your vitals. I’m the doctor here, Simon, lest you forget. You came to me for help. I’m not going to leave my job half done.” He still hadn’t let go of her wrist, making for close quarters as she sat next to him. “And it should go without saying that doctor-patient privilege
holds. I won’t discuss anything private about your condition or treatment with anyone. The only one I’m authorized to discuss your fitness with is your CO and I’ve already promised to call him tonight with an update. If you trust me enough to treat you, you should trust my discretion as well.”
Simon seemed to think about it for a long moment, then finally let go of her wrist and lay back, flat on the small bed. The cot was barely large enough to hold his muscular frame, but she recognized the signs of intense fatigue. A man could sleep just about anywhere when they were as tired as he was. She had seen it before in troops undergoing combat training.
Simon’s circumstances puzzled her. He seemed to be working alone and was no longer an official member of the military. A lone former special forces soldier, working clandestinely on one of the nation’s most high-profile military bases, showing all the signs of having been living in the field and working hard on whatever mission he’d been given. It didn’t make a lot of sense.
Even more troubling was Commander Sykes’s unusual interest and the prohibitions he had given her against speaking about Simon’s presence or condition. Something was definitely up, but it looked like she was the only one, aside from the commander and Simon, who had any idea that something was going on. What it was, she had no clue.
When Simon didn’t make any more objections, she reached over and flicked on the bedside light so she could see him better. A few of the minor cuts had been left uncovered and they looked remarkably good. In fact, as she took a closer look, most of them seemed completely healed.
Impossible.
She adjusted the light closer and looked again. The minor scratches were gone.
Mariana felt chills run down her spine as she reached for the bandages that covered the worst of his wounds. She felt Simon’s attention focus on her as she lifted the edge of the largest gauze pad. The stitches were still there, but the gaping gash beneath was now only a thin red line.
