by Sophie Davis
“I know this is um, kind of awkward, but…,” I trailed off, feeling stupid even saying it.
“What?” James asked, still trying to discern my features in the dark.
“We, um…well, we should lay down. Or at least sit. We’ll be less noticeable to people passing by on the street, especially if they’re looking for human-sized shadows in the darkness.”
James quirked an eyebrow at me, his smirk materializing.
“Is that so? You think we should lay down, do you?”
It was obvious he knew I was right, but he was evidently going to make me pay for suggesting it. Instead of engaging, I peered down at the ground and swiped back and forth at the spot with the bottom of my shoe to clear any large rocks. With a glare at James, who was still grinning at me, I plopped unceremoniously to the ground. It’s not like there was any graceful way to do it.
Settled in with my back against the tree and a large root to one side of me, I gave him an expectant look.
“Oh, forget laying down. Just sit.”
James crossed the space between us and sank to the ground next to me, leaning against the same tree. For a moment I forgot about everything happening outside of our grove of trees. His shoulder was flush with mine, his knee brushing against mine as it rocked back and forth. Evidently his pent-up energy still needed an outlet. I leaned my head back and looked up, the sky barely visible in small gaps between the leaves. Taking in a deep breath, I savored the moment.
“Can I ask you a rather personal question?” James sounded almost shy.
I laughed quietly.
“I think we’re past preempting personal questions.”
“Could’ve warned me,” James muttered.
Cringing, I remembered too late that I’d broached the delicate subject matter at the King’s Pub without so much as a warning. The one that made him choke.
“Ask away,” I said quickly before the situation could become awkward.
James turned his head slightly, looking over at me while I resumed finding patterns in the foliage above.
“Is Invisibility one of your Created Chromes?”
The question caught me off guard and my head snapped back down. It took a long moment to answer.
“Um, yeah. It is,” I said. “Why?”
“That posh school of yours was all about instructing in the use of your abilities, am I right? Keeping them fit, perfecting the pupil’s skills and so on?”
“You sound like a brochure,” I snickered.
“Well, just before, you weren’t certain of your capacities. With Invisibility, I mean. I inferred it wasn’t your strong suit. It simply made me wonder how long you’ve had the gift,” James said, speaking as though I hadn’t interrupted.
“Yeah…you sure you don’t have some Higher Reasoning genes?” I joked.
Even though I was mocking him—it’s not like that was an impressive deduction—I’d actually considered the possibility before. James frequently made innate observations and was an extremely quick, logical thinker. They were the same qualities—although slower, as if unpracticed—I’d only seen in other Higher Reasoning Talents.
James shrugged, not picking up on my sarcasm.
“I suppose it’s possible that I do. We aren’t tested the way your lot is. Honestly, most of us don’t know all that we’re capable of.”
He paused, and I could see the gears churning in his head. James slowly opened his mouth to speak, as if taking a moment to consider his next words carefully, and then abruptly closed it, deciding to stay quiet.
“Let me guess,” I said glibly. “You want to know all of my Talents?”
“It’s only fair,” he said, leaning forward and turning to the side so he could face me fully. “I’m out here risking my life with you. Shouldn’t I know what I’m protecting?” James’s eyes twinkled, as if he meant the words as a joke.
I might’ve have bought that, too, since all along we’d been revealing ourselves to one another with a playful undertone, as a game. But his tone was gruff. Reminiscent of the way he’d spoken to me when we first met. Before I’d broken down and shared every sordid detail of my life, from the time Talia ran until I’d crawled onto that hoverplane. After all of that, he was suddenly a stranger to me once more. Speaking to me as he had before he knew me, when I was just a naïve threat magnet. Suddenly, joking or not, I was livid.
“No one asked you to come,” I shot back. “I don’t need a bodyguard, I’m not some fragile little bird. I’m Created, I can handle myself.”
“Okay, okay, I get it.” James looked wounded and I instantly felt guilty. He held up his hands, palms out, in a placating gesture. “Look, I apologize if I was speaking out of turn. You’re spot on—you didn’t ask me to come and you aren’t fragile. But…well, you do need looking after. I mean, just have a look at yourself. You’re right knackered after going full on with your Chrome for only a few minutes.”
I stiffened at the insult. Turning to the side and mirroring his position, I straightened my spine so our eyes were on an even keel and glared at James.
“I. Am. Fine,” I said, enunciating each word.
James sighed and leaned towards me, clasping my hands in his. My body defied me, relishing the feel of his long fingers wrapped around mine, the rough skin perfectly balanced by his gentle touch. There was a comfort there that I longed to embrace. To wrap his arms around me and envelope myself in his warmth. To let him protect me from the night.
Ugh, you’re such a girl! This is so not the time for this, Kenly!
Unable to let go of that sense of wellbeing brought on by his touch, I didn’t pull away. But I at least refused to move my fingers a millimeter, lest he thought I was returning the gesture. Fighting to hold completely still, I didn’t let my steely exterior give away my melting interior.
“I. Am. Sorry. Kenly,” he said, enunciating the words as I’d done. “Truly. I meant what I said. What you did before, to get us over here? It was fecking brilliant. The effort did tire you, though. Be as stubborn as you like and refuse to admit it, but I can tell.”
I opened my mouth to reply, but my voice was lost in my throat when he held a finger against my lips. When he continued, his voice was just as sure, but a gruff undertone crept in.
“And yes, I’m aware it was all for my benefit. You wouldn’t be so spent if it weren’t for aiding me. I’m bloody grateful. As soon as we find somewhere safe to hide out and all the nutters bugger off, I’ll think of a way to properly thank you for that.”
There was barely any space between us. I hoped the darkness was cloaking the blush that crept up into my cheeks at the thought of a ‘proper thank you.’ I leaned back against the trunk again, once more facing the trees opposite us, instead of the handsome boy with the strong hands and soft lips just inches away.
His apology went a long way towards alleviating my anger. In fact, in hindsight, I was ashamed of how quickly it had risen. I had many faults, but that wasn’t one of them. Anger was irrational, and my brain kept me logical most of the time.
It dawned on me that I’d seen this effect before, on someone else. On Talia. According to Donavon, she’d always had a short temper. But in the year she’d spent recovering for her final mission with the Hunters, that temper had become explosive. The doctors and the Director had fretted over her mental stability, constantly worried that Talia was on the verge of a nervous breakdown.
An ominous chill snaked up my spine.
Stop it. You are not her. You’re okay, you’re just edgy from using your Talents so much today. Try to relax, chill out…before he starts to regret coming with you.
I took a deep breath. There was a simple way to get past my outburst. Simple, but not easy.
“Visionary,” I whispered.
James froze, his gaze narrowed in my direction.
“Pardon?”
“You wanted to know all of my Talents. Including my new Created ones, I have four. You already know about three of them: Light Manipulation, Telekinesis,
and Higher Reasoning. The fourth, the one I didn’t tell you about—I mean, it’s not like I just didn’t tell you, I’ve actually never told anyone—is future glimpsing. Those of us with the ability are called Visionaries.”
James rose to his feet, and took several slow steps away from me. As if I’d just admitted to having a contagious disease.
“What? Don’t you have those over here?” I asked, confused. Even though I’d just told myself to relax, I couldn’t help feeling kind of offended. I wasn’t a leper.
James whirled around, seeking my gaze through the mist.
“Of course we do. But they’re particularly rare here, Kenly. You must know that.”
“Yeah, I do. Visionaries are rare back home, too,” I said, shrugging. “But it’s nothing to get all disturbed about, it’s not like I’m going to hurt you or anything.”
James’s laugh was hollow and absolutely devoid of humor.
“Really? Is that why you were so forthcoming with the information, Kenly? Why you kept it a secret this whole time? The Poachers would do anything to get their hands on you if they knew.”
“Then it’s a good thing they don’t know!” I shot back, fighting to keep my voice down. “And if I do get caught, which I won’t, it’s not like I plan to advertise my abilities. I refuse to help those creeps in any way, least of all telling them about anything in the future. Believe me, I appreciate how dangerous this particular gift can be in the wrong hands.”
“You refuse, do you? That’s it, you’ll just refuse?” James mocked. “You don’t get to refuse, Kenly. That’s not how they operate. The Poachers, they’re animals. They have no moral qualms whatsoever. Believe me, their creativity is astounding when it comes to assuring obedience.”
James paced back and forth, anxiously running one hand through his hair while flexing the other at his side. The repetitive head rubbing was creating an impressive amount of static electricity and strands of his silky hair were standing at attention.
James came to a stop in front of me, looking me in the eye for the first time since assuring me a ‘proper thank you’ was forthcoming. I’d give anything to go back to that moment. The whirling silver softened when he saw how tense I’d become.
Maybe you’re not as invincible as you think you are, an annoying whisper echoed in the back of my mind.
But I was, maybe not invincible exactly but close damn it. I was Created. If I refused to do something, that was that. All of those people out hunting should be terrified of me, not the other way around. The Poachers, too.
I had half a mind to let them catch me, just to teach them not to screw with the Created. How would they even contain me? Locks could be disengaged with a blink. Cages could be disassembled at the seams with only a thought. Jailors would be brought to their knees, begging for mercy, simply because I’d considered it.
And yet…I hadn’t been terrorizing the Monroes in my Vision. I hadn’t been gliding out the front door, the house taken to pieces in my wake. I hadn’t been able to stop Libby from causing James that excruciating, soul-shattering pain. A niggling doubt crept up, wondering how accurate the Visions really were.
I thought of the crew we saw prowling down the alleyway, less than fifty feet from us. The one I’d been desperate to evade.
The useless butter knife glinting under the streetlights.
If I’d been able to do those things, to make the Monroes fear the Created, fear me, surely I would have seen it in the Vision.
Fear slithered up my spine, chilling me to the core and causing the hairs to rise on my arms. James’s words whispered over and over in my mind: ‘their creativity is astounding when it comes to assuring obedience.’ I couldn’t let them use him to get to me. I just couldn’t.
James crouched down in front of me. His hands were on my forearms, gently rubbing away the goose bumps and bringing me out of my thoughts.
“Kenly, I’m sorry. I’m merely frustrated. Honestly, I’ve been caught by the Poachers once before. I don’t mind telling you, I’m a bit unnerved by the prospect of going through the experience for a second time. Please, let’s not have us a row.”
“I’m sorry, too,” I sighed, feeling like we were just continuously apologizing back and forth in a loop. “I should have told you before about the Visions. It’s just, I’ve only had a couple, and I’m not even sure yet what it’s all about. And, well…I sort of thought you might react like this,” I peeked up at him, gauging his response. “I don’t want to fight either.”
Awkward silence descended between us, neither sure what to say next. James sank back down beside me, fiddling with several sparse blades of grass. With all of the insanity racing through my mind, I wanted to grasp onto something finite. Maybe it wasn’t the best time—it certainly wasn’t the best lead-in—but I figured it was no holds barred at this point.
“What was it like?” I finally asked.
I didn’t elaborate—we both knew I was asking about his time with the Poachers. The question was exceedingly personal, and I half-expected him to tell me to mind my own business.
Crossing his arms over his chest, James tipped his head back so the trunk was supporting the weight of it. He closed his eyes, acting almost as if he hadn’t heard the question, and let the mist bathe his face. After a long sigh, he spoke so quietly that I had to lean in to hear him.
“Absolutely terrifying. I’ve never been more frightened. Not before, and not since.”
What he’d been through was beyond my comprehension. There was no adequate response to his statement. Saying “I’m sorry,” would’ve been trite and trivial and didn’t come close to expressing how regretful I truly felt. So I sat quietly, waiting for him to speak again.
Out of the darkness I heard a snort. “Still think I’m something of a badass?”
There were so many other things I wanted to say, but I followed suit, keeping the tone as light as the subject matter was dark.
“Don’t be ridiculous, give yourself a break. You were, what? Ten? You were still a child. Of course you were scared. It’s irrelevant to the badass you’ve become,” I replied, nudging his shoulder.
“It was the Monroes who caught me,” James continued as though I hadn’t spoken. “Earlier, when I told you the reason I got tossed from school, I wasn’t entirely truthful.”
“So you did electrocute Jaylen Monroe on purpose. I knew it,” I said, smiling despite the grim topic.
“No, it was truly an accident. But I hit him with enough charge that he wet his knickers. One of our schoolmates, he was an Intellect, like you, though he carried on as if he were just an absolute whiz with computers. Hacked into the live feeds from the surveillance camera that covered the sporting yard, and commed the recording to every bloke in school.” James laughed at the memory. “It was absolutely brilliant. Jaylen was humiliated, of course, and livid. Can’t say I fault him for that. But, apparently…having me tossed wasn’t good enough.” The mirth was gone from James’s voice, as he continued into the part of the story he’d left out before.
“Monroe wanted to settle the score, to get back at me. I suppose his father, the Duke, felt the same way. He came for me himself. Once they had me locked up, Jaylen came to have a chat. Said he wanted there to be no mistake about who was responsible for my capture, that it was no turn of fate when the Duke found me on the streets. Jaylen told me he was in control, that he owned me.”
I leaned in next to him and found his trembling hands in the dark. Winding our fingers together, I cupped my other hand on top of his and held on tight. A bitter bark of laughter escaped James’s lips.
“I have half a mind to thank him for that. That smug sneer of his made me so furious that I forgot to be scared for a time. The Monroes held me prisoner in that dungeon of theirs for nearly a month. Gave me just enough food to prevent starvation. I recall—”
James’s voice broke and I wanted to tell him to stop, that I didn’t need to know anymore, that I didn’t care. I’d already heard enough to want to tear Jaylen
and his spoiling father limb from limb, slowly removing pieces while keeping them alive. Despite my violent thoughts, I could tell that this was something James needed to say out loud, that it was a form of catharsis
No longer feeling self-conscious, I scooted closer and wrapped my other arm around his stomach, locking him in what I hoped was a comforting embrace. Then I sat quietly with my head on chest, listing to every beat of his heart while waiting for him to continue.
“I recall being so weak that I could barely form a proper thought. All I could think of was the pain in my stomach, my mind consumed by longing for just a sip of water. With so little energy, I wouldn’t have been able to use my Chromes anyway. But still, they…they injected me a formulary that suppressed my powers. Do you know what it’s like to be kept apart from your Chromes, Kenly?”
Even though James wasn’t looking at me, I shook my head.
“It’s the worst feeling in the world. Imagine you haven’t eaten in days. And there, just ahead, is an apple dangling on a cord. Scarcely beyond your reach. You stand on your tiptoes, jutting your shoulder out, praying for your limbs to stretch the smallest amount. Mere millimeters are needed for your fingers to make contact with the fruit. But they don’t.
“So you jump, knowing that’ll do the trick. And the apple seems to jump with you, forever suspended a bit too high. You can’t keep from trying again, continuing to jump over and over again until you’re too weak to carry on. Even then, you tell yourself that the next time will be it. You’ll get it. You just need a bit of rest. Because you are so starved, and because you crave that apple so badly, and because it is so very close, you cannot help but repeat the process. Over and over, even if drives you mad.
“Attempting to get hold of my Chromes almost drove me mad. They were right there, I could feel them, just a bit further on. Hating Jaylen Monroe is all that kept me from going mad trying to get to them. I couldn’t stop reaching for my Chromes, because they’re a part of me, just as yours are a part of you. I just had to get them back. It would’ve been so easy for me to fry them all, to show Jaylen what it was like to really feel my power. I just…I just had to reach them. I was…desperate.”
