by Marie Force
Seamus went flying backward, falling hard against one of the benches and landing on the deck. For the longest time, he didn’t move, and for a brief, terrifying second, Shannon feared he’d killed his cousin.
Filled with unreasonable terror, Shannon leaned over him. “Seamus, I’m sorry!” He shook his shoulder. “Seamus! Wake up!” They’d attracted a crowd of curious onlookers, including several of Shannon’s fellow deckhands. “Please wake up.”
“Quit yer bellowing,” Seamus said without opening his eyes. The left side of his face was already swelling and turning purple.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… I don’t know why…”
Seamus held up his hand, opening the eye that still worked. “Stop talking and help me up.”
Shannon took hold of his cousin’s hand and hauled him to his feet, grasping his shoulder when Seamus wavered.
“Show’s over, folks,” Seamus said. “Move along.”
“Go get some ice,” Shannon said to one of the guys he worked with. “Hurry.” He helped Seamus onto the bench. “I’m really sorry.”
“I heard you the first time.”
His colleague Mark returned with a bag of ice that he handed to Seamus, who applied it to his face. “Sit yer arse down,” Seamus said to Shannon when they were alone again.
Shannon sat next to him on the bench.
“You’ve put me in an awkward situation here. Because half the crew saw you hit me, I have no choice but to suspend you for three days for disciplinary reasons. An official note will be placed in your employee file. In this company, it’s two strikes and you’re out—cousin or not.”
Knowing he’d fucked up, Shannon took a deep breath and let it out. “Okay.”
“I want to say something else, and I want you to listen to me.” Seamus removed the ice from his bruised face. “For nine long years, we’ve stood by you and tried to support you as best we could through an unimaginable tragedy. In the last year, I’ve seen you come back to life, back to the man you were before you lost Fi. That’s because of Victoria. You lost Fiona through no fault of your own. If you push Victoria away because she’s gotten too close, that’ll be your own tough shit.”
Taking the ice bag with him, Seamus got up and walked away.
Filled with despair the likes of which he hadn’t felt so deeply in years, Shannon watched him go.
* * *
“I’m seriously in awe of you,” Luke said to Syd late that afternoon, after Victoria had declared both ladies to be in perfect health and left them alone to care for their new baby. Lily—he had a daughter named Lily—was asleep in her bassinette next to their bed.
“Is that right?” Syd said with a saucy smile. Before Victoria left, he’d helped Sydney take a shower and gotten her settled back in bed while Victoria watched the baby.
Though Sydney was exhausted, her eyes were alight with joy. “Mmm,” he said, nuzzling her neck. “That’s right. You amaze me. After months of planning and me stressing out about all the things that could go wrong, you go and give birth without even leaving our bed.”
Sydney laughed. “Well, that wasn’t exactly the plan.”
“I’m still allowed to be amazed.”
“I’m just glad she’s here safely, and we didn’t have to leave the island to have her.”
“Do you think she’ll always be so accommodating of her parents?”
“Doubtful. I expect her to be a strong-willed girl like her sister was.”
“That’d be fine with me, as long as you promise to protect me during the teenage years, when my little princess turns into a demon child.”
She patted his head. “I’ll run interference. Don’t worry.”
“Sometimes I still can’t believe…” His throat tightened and his eyes filled. He’d been an emotional disaster all day.
“What can’t you believe?”
“That you came back. That you actually love me and agreed to marry me and have given me a daughter. I was so alone for such a long time… And now…” He caressed her face and gently kissed her. “Now, I have everything.”
“I don’t even like to think about what I’d be doing if I hadn’t come to the island or if you hadn’t come to find me.”
“Don’t you mean if I hadn’t spied on you?” he asked with a chuckle.
“It doesn’t count as spying if I knew you were there. The scrape of your boat landing on the beach was one of the most familiar sounds in my life back when we were first together. I used to listen for it every night.”
“Best thing I ever did was row my boat to your beach, baby,” he said with a lascivious grin.
Sydney laughed at the double meaning behind his words. “You’re going to make sure I’m not a total freak show with her, right?”
“Of course I am.”
“I don’t want her to grow up to be afraid of everything the way I am now.”
“You’re not giving yourself enough credit, honey. Look at what you’ve already done to prove you’re not afraid of what might happen.”
“What do you mean?”
“You married me. You had the tubal ligation reversed. You allowed me to knock you up, which was a great pleasure, I might add. You’ve given birth to a new baby. To me, all those things indicate your tremendous courage, not debilitating fear.”
“That’s nice of you to say, but the fear is still there. Maybe I just hide it better than I used to.”
“I’m not just spewing platitudes here, Syd. I mean it when I say you’re not giving yourself enough credit. You aren’t the same fearful person you were when we first got back together. You’ve come a long way from there. Maybe you can’t see it, but I do.”
“If that’s true, it’s because of you. Your love has given me the strength to go on, to be optimistic and hopeful and joyful and all the things I thought I’d never be again after I lost Seth and the kids.”
Luke leaned in to kiss her. “Whatever I’ve given you is a fraction of what I’ve gotten back in return.”
Her smile lit up her gorgeous blue eyes. “I was thinking…”
“About?”
“This one went pretty well. Easy conception, uneventful pregnancy and delivery…”
His heart stopped beating for a second. “What’re you saying?”
“Maybe we ought to do it one more time so Lily doesn’t grow up alone.”
Luke stared at her, incredulous. They’d agreed that one child would be a miracle. The thought of another was almost more than he could process.
Sydney waved her hand in front of his face. “Earth to Luke. Have I totally shocked you?”
“No, sweetheart, you’ve totally thrilled me.”
“So you’d be game for doing this again?”
“Anything you want. Anything at all.”
“Hmm,” she said, her expression mischievous, “that’s a pretty big mandate you’re giving me.”
“It’s a pretty big love I have for you.”
Moving slowly and carefully, Sydney snuggled up to him, and Luke wrapped his arms around her, profoundly relieved to have the delivery behind them and a lifetime to look forward to with Sydney and Lily and whoever might come next.
* * *
After leaving the Harrises’, Victoria spent a few hours at the clinic, helping David prepare Tiffany and Jenny to take their babies home. Jenny was having some challenges with breastfeeding, so Victoria spent an hour trying to help. She was so tired that her brain was actually buzzing from the lack of sleep.
“Go home,” David said at two. “Before you fall over and become a patient.”
“I’m going.” Victoria didn’t have the energy to argue with him. “Back to business as usual tomorrow.”
“Let’s hope so.”
Victoria drove home with the windows open, hoping the fresh air would keep her awake long enough to make it safely to her driveway. She couldn’t recall the last time she’d been this tired. Well, maybe the week she met Shannon when they’d stayed up every night for days becau
se they’d been having too much fun to sleep.
Thinking about those first days together made her smile. That had been the most exciting time, to have found someone who captivated her so completely. That was all she’d ever wanted for her personal life, a man who loved her as much as she loved him and to live happily ever after with him. Was that too much to ask?
This time yesterday, she would’ve said she and Shannon had laid the foundation for that kind of relationship. Now she wasn’t sure of anything.
When she pulled into the driveway, she was surprised to see his motorcycle parked outside. He was supposed to be at work. What the hell? She got out of the car and went inside, where he was seated at the kitchen table, an ice pack on his hand.
“Hey,” she said. “What’s wrong?”
He looked up at her, his eyes bleak. “Got into a fight at work. They sent me home for three days.”
Stunned, she said, “A fight about what?”
“If it’s okay, I’d rather not talk about it.”
“Oh,” she said, stung by his dismissive tone. “Okay. I’m… ah… just going to get some sleep, then.”
He nodded and returned his attention to his injured hand.
Victoria went into the bathroom and numbly went through the motions of changing into a T-shirt and brushing her teeth. In the bedroom, she closed the blinds and got into bed, staring up at the ceiling while trying to make sense of what he’d told her.
He’d gotten into a fight. Her Shannon, a pacifist down to his bones, had actually gotten into a fight at work and was sent home for three days. What the heck could’ve precipitated that? And why wouldn’t he tell her what happened?
She, who had been thoroughly exhausted ten minutes ago, was now so wired she couldn’t sleep. How was it possible that in just twenty-four hours, her entire world had been turned upside down? Why hadn’t she left well enough alone and resisted the temptation to ask questions of Seamus? Now she had information she didn’t know what to do with, and Shannon was getting into fights. Coincidence? Probably not.
Oh God. What if he’d fought with Seamus? The possibility had her sitting up in bed, reeling from the potential implications of Shannon fighting with a man who was not only his boss but also his cousin. Was that what’d happened? Victoria got out of bed and went to the kitchen to find the chair he’d recently occupied now empty.
Outside, the roar of his bike starting up had her running for the door, but she was too late. He was gone by the time she made it outside. Where was he going, and when would he be back?
Victoria went inside, but she was far too agitated to sleep. She needed answers, and she needed them now. Instead of going back to bed, she got dressed and shoved her feet into flip-flops, grabbing her purse and keys on the way out the door.
Mindful of her lack of sleep, Victoria made an effort to concentrate on her driving and not on the turmoil roiling inside her. She took a right turn into a driveway that had become familiar to her in the last year after many visits and parked next to Seamus’s truck. In the yard, Kyle and Jackson were playing with their dog, laughing and running around the way little boys ought to.
Victoria waved to them on her way to the house, where she knocked on the back door.
Carolina came to the door and didn’t seem surprised to see her. “Come in.”
Her stomach aching with nerves, Victoria followed her into the kitchen, stopping short at the sight of Seamus’s badly bruised and swollen face. For a long moment, she couldn’t bring herself to move. She could only stare.
“Come in, Vic,” Seamus said. “Looks worse than it is.”
“It’s all my fault,” she said, her voice rough with emotion. “I never should’ve come to you. If I hadn’t… He never would’ve… This…”
Seamus got up and came over to her. “It’s not your fault.”
“You two fought because you told me about Fiona. That’s why, right?”
“We fought because he didn’t like something I said to him.”
“But it started because I went to you with questions I should’ve asked him.” Blinded by tears, Victoria wiped her cheek with the back of her hand.
Carolina came to her, put her hands on Victoria’s shoulders and guided her to a seat at the table. “You didn’t throw the punch,” she said.
“I started the fight, though,” Victoria said.
“No, you didn’t,” Seamus said. “I pushed him too far.”
Carolina raised the ice bag to his face and held it in place. “That doesn’t give him the right to punch you.”
“I’ve made such a mess of things,” Victoria said. “I should’ve left well enough alone.”
“If you’d done that, your relationship with him never would’ve been more than what it is right now,” Seamus said. “I was under the impression you wanted it to be more.”
“I did. I do. But not if it’s going to cause this kind of trouble.”
“You were trying to understand him better by going to Seamus,” Carolina said. “You had no way to know the magnitude of what you were going to be told or how he’d react to hearing that Seamus told you. Your intentions were pure and came from a place of love. No one can fault you for that.”
Carolina’s softly spoken words broke something in Victoria, the core of strength that had been holding her together since learning of Shannon’s tragic past. She dropped her head into her hands as her body shook with sobs, her heart broken for Shannon’s loss as much as her worries about her own future with him.
A few minutes later, the unmistakable roar of Shannon’s motorcycle outside had Victoria hurrying to dry her face and wipe her eyes with the tissue Carolina handed her.
Seamus put the ice bag on the table. “Let me handle this.” He stalked to the door and went outside.
Chapter 6
The slam of the screen door closing startled Victoria out of the daze she’d fallen into. She got up to follow Seamus, who had Shannon by the arm in the yard.
“Wait,” she cried. “Stop. Just stop!” She forced her way between the cousins and took hold of Shannon’s arm. “Walk away. Right now.” She marched him toward the path that led from the yard to the rugged coastline.
Jackson and Kyle stood off to the side, watching them go by with big eyes.
Victoria felt bad for bringing their drama to Seamus and Carolina’s home.
“What’re you doing here?” Shannon asked when they had left the yard behind.
“About two seconds after you left, I figured out who you fought with at work, and I came to check on him.”
“You’re awfully cozy with my cousin all of a sudden.”
Victoria gave him a hard shove that he didn’t see coming, making him stumble on the dirt path. “Shut up. I am not cozy with him. I am friends with him through you, as you well know.”
When he turned to face her, she was taken aback by the stormy expression on his face. In all their time together, she’d never seen that particular look on him before. “I don’t know who you think you are, poking your nose into stuff that’s none of your business.”
“None of my business? How do you figure it’s none of my business when you’re living in my house and sleeping in my bed?”
“Both of which can be easily rectified.”
Stunned by the hostile rebuke, Victoria reeled from the meaning behind his words. “So that’s how you’re going to play this? You’re going to run away because I wanted to know why we’re stuck in the same place we were a year ago?”
“That’s what you think? That we’re in the same place we were a year ago?” He shook his head in disbelief.
“We’re exactly where we were then. We haven’t taken a single step forward from the day you moved in.”
“That is not true,” he said softly.
She couldn’t miss the hint of sadness in his tone. “Shannon—”
He held up a hand to stop her. “I can’t do this.”
A shockingly painful bolt of fear jolted her. “What can’t you do?”
“This. Any of it. I never should’ve… I can’t.” He brushed by her and started back up the path toward the yard.
“Shannon, wait! You can’t just walk away from me after everything we’ve shared.”
He whirled around. “According to you, we haven’t shared anything.”
“I never said that!”
“Didn’t you?”
When he started walking again, she chased after him, grabbing his shirt and forcing him to stop.
“I never said that.”
“What did you say, then, Vic? Explain it to me.”
She swallowed the huge lump in her throat and tried to ignore the roar in her ears and the relentless beat of her heart so she could focus on him. “I said we are stuck in the same place we started. That’s all.”
“I don’t know how you can say that.” He raised his hands to his head and ran his fingers roughly through his hair, leaving it standing on end.
She had to resist the urge to straighten it the way she would have only yesterday, before she ruined everything by digging into his past.
“If you think that,” he said, “you don’t know me at all.”
“I want to know you. Why do you think I went to Seamus in the first place? It’s because I want that so badly.”
“So badly that you couldn’t ask me what you wanted to know?”
He had her there. “I was afraid to.”
Seeming stunned, he stared at her. “You were afraid to talk to me? What the hell, Victoria?”
“I don’t know why I felt that way. I guess I figured if you were ever going to tell me what was holding you back from fully committing to me, you would’ve by now.”
“Fully committing,” he said with a huff of incredulous laughter. “I live with you. I sleep with you. I have sex with you almost every day, sometimes twice a day. How do you define fully committed?”
Victoria had to fight the need to squirm under his intense green-eyed gaze. “Is that it? Is that going to be our life? Living together, sleeping together, having sex?”
“I thought you liked our life.”
“I do!”
“Then what in the name of God is the problem, Victoria?”
